熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S05E09

Part 2 Dec. 8, 2020, 10:54 p.m.

Did you find a smart, conservative investment?
你找到精明的传统投资了吗
Better.
我找到个更好的
What'd you do?
那你都要做什么呢
You bought a whatever-that-is?
你买♥♥了一个不论它是什么的东西
No, I bought 5,000 of whatever-that-is is.
没有我买♥♥了五千个不论它是什么的东西
The Guzzle Buddy!
狂欢好伴侣
At first, I said, "Chug Buddy,"
首先我说"咔嚓好伴侣"
and then you said, "Guzzle Chug,"
接着你说"狂欢咔嚓"
and then I mated those two into "Guzzle Buddy"!
我就把它们合起来变成"狂欢好伴侣"
Oh, are you calling the news?
你是要给新闻中心打电♥话♥吗
No, I just told Bobby
没有我刚告诉鲍比
he was the dumbest person I know,
他是我认识的最傻的人
so I have to call and apologize.
但现在看来我错了我得打电♥话♥道歉
So, Andy's investment talk was all
安迪的投资谈话都是关于
funds and percentages and mutual hedgehogs.
资金和所占股份还有互利
But then I hit him with this.
但我现在用这个给了他一个回击
Is that a piece from a meth lab?
你这是从毒品实验室淘过来的吗
The Guzzle Buddy takes your wine bottle and turns it into...
狂欢好伴侣把你的酒瓶变成了
your wine glass.
酒杯
This is my fault for pairing Miss "Get rich quick"
这是我的错让"一夜致富"小姐和
with Mr. "If someone I like gets excited, I get excited too."
"看别人高兴我就高兴"先生组合在一起
You're like a golden retriever.
你就像个金毛猎犬似的
This is the real deal.
这真是个好投资
Do you think everyone was like "Ooh!"
你认为当初乔布斯研发出苹果手♥机♥
the first time Steve Jobs held up an iPhone?
所有人都看好吗
Yes, I do!
是啊我就看好了
Well, you'll see when we're the top-selling Christmas item.
等我们成了圣诞节畅销产品时你就知道了
Of all time! Yeah!
打破记录哦
We're gonna triple our money, like, times 1,000.
我们能挣三倍的钱比如乘一千
I'm sorry, did you say, "Our money"?
抱歉你刚刚是说"我们的钱"
I invested, too. 50/50 partners.
我也投资了我们是合作伙伴
How could I pass it up?
我怎能错过这样的好机会呢
Let's see.
比如说
Stand up and walk out of the room.
起身离开
Say "No."
拒绝投资呗
Call your not-stupid wife.
给你聪明的妻子打个电♥话♥
Cover your ears and say, "La, la, la, la."
捂住你的耳朵对投资不予理睬
She won't be "La, la, la"ing
等她看到我们开游艇到处游玩
when she's riding around on our yacht.
她态度就不会这样了
Guzzle Buddy.
狂欢好伴侣
So excited.
好激动啊
To our yacht. Mm.
为我们的游艇干杯
Is the parking lot possum back?
那个停车场的负鼠回来了吗
Why are you going all uncle Frank on your bag?
你为什么在你包上做弗兰克叔叔做的事
Who's uncle Frank?
谁是弗兰克叔叔
He's my uncle from Tallahassee who had a thing for bludgeoning.
他是我在塔拉哈西用大头棒打东西的叔叔
You know, there's a documentary about him on Netflix.
奈飞网上有一个关于他的纪录片
Hey, listen, I felt bad that we laughed at your bag,
对不起因为刚才我们嘲笑了你的包
so I came by to apologize.
所以我特地来给你道歉
Oh, no. You guys were right, man.
没有啊你们说得对
This thing's too new.
这东西太新了
That's why I'm trying to beat it up a little.
这就是我敲打它的原因
Good idea.
好主意
Once it's weathered, it'll be a total aunt Marge.
一旦它风化了它就完全变成了玛姬姑妈
It's my aunt who got stuck in a tanning bed for 12 hours.
她之前在美黑床上被困十二个小时
Her face is like the back seat of a Porsche.
脸晒得像保时捷的后座似的
I've been beating this thing up for, like, an hour,
我都打了快一个小时了
and I can't put a scratch on it.
结果它一点都没坏
Want to give it a shot?
想试一下不
But keep the hammer.
但我不用锤子
I'm gonna go "Girl fight" on this one.
我要和它进行"女生格斗"
Yeah, take that, bitch!
接招吧鬼东西
You think you can look at my man?!
你以为你能觊觎我的男人
Told you.
我就说吧
This bag is going down.
这个包包死定了
This place is weird.
这地方可真诡异
Why are we here?
我们为什么会在这
Well, I'm here because I own a bar
我在这里是因为我有间酒吧
and I want to check out the scene.
想来看下这里怎么样
You're here because you saw me walking and followed me.
你呢则是因为看见了我所以跟进来了
I was afraid if I asked to come, you'd say no.
我怕我主动要求过来你会拒绝我
Since when did the Pringles guy become a style icon?
什么时候品客胡子男成为时尚标志了
I thought it was "Mario Brothers" chic.
我还以为那是马里奥兄弟的胡子呢
Grayson? What are you doing here?
格雷森你来这里干什么
You know, just illin' and chillin',
随便耍耍而已
checkin' out the competish.
探探军情神马的
There's supposed to be a room in the back
在后面应该有一个房♥间
where drinks are half off
那里酒水半价
and they project French New-Wave Cinema onto the wall.
他们还在墙上放映法国新浪潮电影呢
Yeah?
是吗
Well, if you find it,
如果你找到那个房♥间
let me know so I can not go there!
一定要告诉我这样我就不会去了
I mean, it's - what's with this 1920s vibe?
这上世纪20年代的复古风是什么情况
It's like, extra, extra!
号♥外号♥外
There's a party over at Gatsby's house!
在盖茨比家有一场聚会
Do the Charleston, yeah.
让我们来跳查尔斯登舞吧
I just had a hot-lather shave in the men's room.
我刚在男洗手间刮了胡子
This place is the bee's knees!
这里真好
Who's this guy? He's so tall and random.
这男的是谁又高又随意
I'm Tom.
我是汤姆
Classic. We should take him with us to Coachella.
经典我们应该带他去科切拉音乐节
Well, I can't hear anything over all this accordion music.
因为这手风琴音乐我什么都听不见了
What do you say we take this party back to my bar?!
我们去我的酒吧狂欢怎么样
Who's with me?!
谁跟我走
Tom?
汤姆
Uh, I'm gonna stick. I dig the vibe.
我想留在这我喜欢这氛围
People look like they work in the engine room of the Titanic.
这里的人像在泰坦尼克号♥发动机室里工作一样
So random.
如此随意
Thanks for coming over for wine, everyone.
同志们谢谢你们过来喝酒
To the place we go every day and do exactly that?
难道就为我们经常做的事表示感谢
No problem.
不客气
Yeah, but, uh, what's with the empty glasses?
但为什么是空玻璃杯
Empty glasses? What the heck?!
空玻璃杯这是怎么回事呢
Andy, can you pour me a glass of wine?
安迪给我倒杯酒吧
Coming right up, Jules.
马上给你倒茱尔斯
Oh! Again?! What a mess!
怎么又这样搞得乱七八糟
And what a waste of time!
还这么浪费时间
There's got to be a better way.
一定有更好的方法
I already need another one!
我现在就要喝另一杯了
Another?
另一杯
I'm still busy cleaning up the mess from the last time!
上一杯的烂摊子我还没收拾干净呢
Has this ever happened to you?
你是否遇到过这样的情况
Not once in my entire life.
从来没有哦
Is this some sort of performance piece?
你们是不是在表演呢
Pouring wine is such a chore.
倒酒可真是个累活
The clean-up, the time wasting.
还要打扫干净多浪费时间
Ow! Wine wrist!
倒酒手腕
And the injuries!
倒酒带来的伤害
But those days are over, thanks to...
但我们马上要告别这样的日子了那是因为
Oh, my god. They're doing an infomercial.
天啊他们在做专题广♥告♥片
Guzzle Buddy!
狂欢好伴侣
What's a Guzzle Buddy, and how does it work?
什么是狂欢好伴侣啊它是干什么的
Well, there's two easy steps.
就只需要两个简单步骤
You just plug it...
把这个插♥进♥去
And chug it! ... and chug it!
拧一下再拧一下
If this is being filmed, I have to tell my agent.
未经经纪人允许我不能随便出镜的
So, the next time you're hosting a shower or wedding
下一次你再开送礼会或者婚礼
or simply hanging out with your friends, remember...
或者只是跟你朋友在一起记着...
Pouring is boring!
倒酒最傻
Guzzle buddy! Guzzle buddy!
狂饮好助手狂饮好助手