熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S05E10

Part 2 Dec. 8, 2020, 10:54 p.m.

Bitches be loco!
女人都是疯子
Uh, Helen Keller called...
海伦·凯勒打来电♥话♥
Do you ever wonder who these people are
你有没有想过这些人都是谁
or where they're going or what their story is?
或者有着怎样的故事
No. Good. Me neither.
没那就好我也没有
Oh, look, it's Tom. Hey!
看是汤姆
Jules, uh, you're not at, uh, work,
茱尔斯你没去上班啊
Where I -- I thought you'd be.
我我以为你去上班了呢
I have to go.
我得走了
Ready, dad? Got the tickets.
走吧爸爸我买♥♥到票啦
Dad? I thought you said your daughter left?
爸爸你不是说你女儿走了吗
Uh, the thing is, uh, Jules, I --
呃其实茱尔斯我
Wait. This is Jules?
等等这就是茱尔斯
I thought you were in chattanooga at a real-estate convention.
我以为你在查特怒加开房♥地♥产♥大会呢
I can't believe I finally get to meet my dad's girlfriend.
真不敢相信我终于见到我爸的女朋友了
Oh, I am definitely going on this ride.
这场好戏之旅可不容错过啊
I can't believe Tom told his daughter I was his girlfriend.
真不敢相信汤姆跟他女儿说我是他女友
Or do you think he meant that I was a girl that's just a friend?
你觉得他的意思是不是女性朋友呢
No. I think he meant you two were boom-chicka-wow-wow.
不是我觉得他的意思就是在一起啪啪啪
Jules. Thanks for not saying anything to Haylee.
茱尔斯谢谢你没有揭穿我
There's a simple explanation
至于她为什么把你当成我女友了
for why she thought you were my girlfriend.
其实有个很简单的解释
Yes, because you told her I was your girlfriend? See? Simple.
原因就是你这样说的很简单吧
Haylee's got a good life in New York --
海莉在纽约过的很好
amazing job, great friends.
有好工作好朋友
But she worries about me.
但她总是担心我
If she thought I was all alone,
要是让她知道我还是一个人
she'd drop everything and move here,
她肯定要放弃一切搬回来过
so I told her we were Boomchickawowwow!
所以我告诉她说我们啪啪啪
I'm -- I'm sorry.
我我很抱歉
I'll tell her the truth.
我会告诉她真♥相♥的
Dad, there you are.
爸你在这呀
What's going on?
怎么啦
Uh, Haylee, um, it's -- it's just -- I -- I've been --
海莉其实就是我
Giving his lady some grade-A Lovin',
正和他的女人打情骂俏呢
you know, the sex kind.
少♥儿♥不♥宜♥的那种
I can really feel the love here.
你俩好甜蜜呀
You should see them kiss. Why don't you guys kiss?
他俩接吻的时候才甜蜜呢亲一个吧
Oh, my lips are really tired.
我我的嘴唇太累了
You know, from all the making out
因为昨天我们的
we did yesterday with our mouths and our tongues.
亲亲抱抱什么的
Uh, oh, hey, Grayson.
嘿格雷森
Oh, this is Grayson?
这就是格雷森吗
Hi, Grayson. It's so sweet
你好格雷森你真好
you take care of your brother after his accident --
愿意照顾受伤的弟弟
hockey puck to the head? Poor thing.
被曲棍球打中脑袋他真是可怜
Dad told me all about it.
我爸都跟我说了
I'm confused.
我怎么不是很懂
Aww, of course you are. My baby's a saint.
你不懂就对了我女儿多善良
I can't believe I'm just now meeting all of you,
我才刚刚见到你们
and I have to leave so soon.
可是马上就要走了
I know. We should all go to lunch.
就是我们应该一起吃个午饭
You know, get to know each other,
了解了解对方
just talk more about this.
好好谈谈
That is a great idea!
这主意真棒
I have hockey practice.
可是我还要练曲棍球
I let him suit up and run around the yard.
就是穿着球衣绕着操场跑
Mrs. Torres, I need your help
托瑞斯夫人我需要您的帮忙
Not interested.
没兴趣
Your husband came to my open-mike night.
您丈夫来参加我的即兴表演之夜了
He did standup. Very interested.
说了单口相声呢这下有兴趣了
Open mike is supposed to be
即兴表演的初衷是
a safe place for creative expression,
表达创意的安全舞台
not a place to repeatedly yell, "Bitches be loco!"
不是一个来大叫女人是疯子的地方
Paint me a picture.
给我描述一下
Well, it started with a room full of daring,
刚开始屋里的都是些前沿的
original artists pouring their hearts out
有创造力的艺术家交流思想
and climaxed was an obnoxious Cuban comic
结果高♥潮♥成了一个讨厌的古巴喜剧
covering hot-button issues like
讨论女孩为什么结伴去卫生间
"Why do girls always go to the bathroom in pairs?"
这种敏感话题
Between the budding Jules/Tom
刚刚看了茱尔斯和汤姆的假恋爱
fake relationship and this,
现在还有这样的好戏
I may have died and gone to heaven.
我要快乐得死掉了
I'm trying to establish myself
我在试图打造一个
as gulfhaven's cultural taste maker.
避风湾高端文化制♥造♥人的形象
Talking like a douche is not helping your case.
像个白♥痴♥一样说话并没有帮助
Please tell me he trotted out his
告诉我他讲了那个
"You know what has two thumbs" Jokes.
你知道什么东西有两个拇指的笑话好吗
You know what has two thumbs and is gonna be
你知道他的下场表演坐在前排的
sitting front seat at his next show?
是哪位有两个拇指的人吗
Hugely helpful, as always.
帮大忙了谢谢
So, Tom told his daughter that a head injury
所以汤姆告诉他女儿我头部受伤
turned me into a simple, good-natured man-child
成了一个智商捉鸡
who needs help dressing himself.
穿衣服都需要帮忙的傻孩子
That's humiliating.
这太过分了
Or is it the role of a lifetime?
你可以当做是你梦寐以求的角色
Oh, right.
对哦
This could be my "Forrest Gump."
这就是我的阿甘正传啊
Oh, this just keeps getting better. Why are you even here?
越来越精彩了为什么你也要来
Jules is about to have lunch with her new boyfriend, Tom,
茱尔斯要和她的新男友汤姆吃饭
and her idiot brother, Grayson, is tagging along?
她的白♥痴♥弟弟也要跟着一起
Where else would I be? Can we focus?
难道我不该来吗别跑题行吗
Tom needs our help, so we're just gonna have to tough it out.
汤姆需要帮助所以我们只能坚持了
Besides, I'm the one who has to cozy up
再说我我才是那个做出牺牲
next to that gangly pile of -- hey, honey bear!
坐在那个瘦长的嗨亲爱的
You guys!
你俩真亲密
We're gonna have to get a fire hose for you two.
我们得找个消防水管来给你俩降降温
You should be glad you don't live next to them.
你应该庆幸你不住他们身边
I mean, the noises that come from that bedroom.
卧室的吵闹声都没法忍♥受
Have you spent any time on a farm?
你在农场住过吗
Sheeps grow their own sweaters,
绵羊自己长毛衣
and cows have finger boobs.
母牛的咪♥咪♥像手指
So, Jules, how did you two meet?
茱尔斯你俩怎么认识的呢
Was it love at first sight? Obviously.
一见钟情吗当然是啦
Well, it was for her. I played hard to get.
是她对我一见钟情啦我对她则是欲擒故纵
But that didn't stop me.
但我一直没有放弃
I would just stand outside of his window like some lunatic,
我像个跟踪狂似的呆在他窗户外面
just saying as many creepy things that popped into my head.
说着一些脑子里冒出来的胡话
I found that so sexy.
我觉得那很性感
Windows are baby doors with no clothes on.
窗户是没有穿衣服的小门
Oh, my god. Would you shut up?
上帝啊你够了没
He's just testing me. I have to set boundaries.
他是在试探我我们得约束着他
You know who doesn't have boundaries?
你知道谁最不受约束吗
These two.
他俩
Jules, you don't have to hold back
茱尔斯你不用因为
just because Haylee's here.
海莉在这就有所顾忌
I'm cool.
没事的
If you guys are into pda, I'm great with that. Oh, good.
我不介意你俩秀恩爱的谢谢
I think I'll get some right now.
那就秀秀好了
Oh, baby, that feels so good.
宝贝这真好
You know, like a xylophone.
简直如同木琴美妙的声音
Oh, keep playing, baby.
那就不要停宝贝
You're about to hit the high note.
马上就要到高音部分了
Isn't this the part where you usually sit on his lap?
通常你都坐在他腿上吧
No. Yes.
不是是
Oh, good. You're wearing shorts.
真好你穿的还是短裤
Oh, damn it!
见鬼
I have to go.
我得走了
I have dueling train-wreck situations happening.
我有个战后事故现场要处理
Thank you so much for everything.
非常感谢你们所做的一切