脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S03E02

Part 3 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:32 p.m.

I'm a mexa-nese jew-rican
想加入你们俱乐部哎哟喂
And I want to join your club, oy vey.
犹太人用的依地语
我们现在不招收新成员把他弄出去
We're not accepting any new members right now. Get him out of here.
嘿傻X们
Hey, stupid.
收了我你们不就轻易达到"平权法案"要求了嘛
I can fulfill all your affirmative action needs in one swoop.
求你们
Please!
让我咬一口你们的特♥供♥三明治
Just give me one bite of that club sandwich
给你们每个人口♥活♥我都愿意啊
And I'll go down on every single one of you.
二手滥用折扣鸡鸡
情趣商店
我要坐在斯蒂娃旁边她美呆了
I want to sit next to Steve-a Longoria. She's awesome.
别碍我的好事
Don't be a box blocker.
你们都好有趣哦
You guys are so much fun.
不好啦大家 - 怎么了 Labia?
Bad news, guys. - What's wrong, labia?
今年我们又被乡村俱乐部拒绝...
We got turned down for the founder's golf tournament
参加他们的创始人纪念日比赛了
At the country club again this year.
他们说咱们本质上还是女人
They said we're still technically women.
那些狂妄的直男简直把女人看成了二等公民
Those snotty breeders treat women like second-class citizens.
要是能有机会扳倒他们就好了
I'd love nothing more than to take them down.
咱肯定能打败那些老杂碎特别是在这周
We would crush those old bastards, especially this week.
有"大姨妈"来帮着我
I'm riding the cotton pony.
你们真觉得咱能赢? - 必须的
You really think we could win? - Hell, yeah.
其实我可能有路子把咱们弄进比赛去
I think I may know a way to get us in the tournament.
斯蒂娃斯蒂娃斯蒂娃
Steve-a, Steve-a, Steve-a.
好哎咱们来撞个胸吧
Yeah, let's bump our beef pies.
#无心说错话#嘛
#sorrynotsorry.
谢谢你带我们逛公园斯蒂娃
Thanks for the tour, steve-a.
你的生活实在太棒了
You have such an exciting life.
那也棒不过你们这帮最佳酷友呢
It's even more exciting with cool best friends like you.
有人说我交不到新朋友你们能信?
Can you believe someone thought I couldn't make new friends?
什么? 说你?
What? You?
真让我无名火起
That makes me irrationally angry.
好啦我得工作啦 "舔鲍者"们回头见
All right, I got to get to work. See you fish lickers later.
哦刚没注意到你在这儿 Denzel
Oh, I didn't see you there, Denzel.
不好意思你说啥呢?
Oh, I'm sorry, did you say something?
我们俱乐部正在就早餐红酒开重要电♥话♥会议呢
I'm on an important club conference call about breakfast wines.
我真不敢相信你这么虚伪
I can't believe you're being so fake.
我虚伪? 你特么都成女同了
I'm being fake? You're a goddamn lesbian.
你不过是嫉妒我的新朋友比你的新朋友更厉害罢了
You're just jealous that my new friends are better than your new friends.
厉害什么舔鲍吗?
Better at what, licking coochie?
你们不就好这口
y'all love that shit.
我敢打赌在高尔夫上我们更厉害
I'll bet we're better at golf.
高尔夫? 我的伙计们可从没输过我跟你赌了
Golf? My boys never lose. I'll take that bet.
正好这周末有庆典赛
And just so happens, there's a tournament this weekend.
真的?
Oh, really?
这个周末就有比赛?
There's a tournament this weekend?
只可惜不让女生参加
It's a shame women aren't allowed in.
这个我搞得定
Oh, I'll fix that.
我的白人兄弟们可听我的话了
These crackers do anything I ask.
好啦报上名了
There. You in.
那赌注是什么? - 简单啊
Now what's the bet? - Simple.
要是我们赢你必须退出俱乐部
If we win, you have to quit the club.
退出俱乐部? 让我想想
Quit the club? Well, I don't know.
你们不是不会输嘛? 别像个胆小鬼怂逼一样
You can't lose, right? Don't be a chicken pussy.
Steve 要么"胆小鬼" 要么"怂逼" 选一个说
Steve, it's either chicken or pussy. Pick one.
对我来说真是难以抉择啊
That's like sophie's choice for me.
好吧跟你赌
All right, I'm in.
如果你输了你必须告诉那些拉拉你是个男人
And when you lose, you have to tell the lesbians that you're a man.
好说
I'm in.
祝你好运斯蒂娃
Good luck, steve-a.
容我告退
Now if you'll excuse me.
超级小象向着俱乐部出发
Super baby elephant, to the club!
大家下午好
Good afternoon.
我是Fred Norris 我旁边这位是Russ Rowland
I'm Fred Norris, and this is Russ Rowland.
欢迎大家观看今年的创始人纪念日庆典赛
Welcome to this year's founder's day golf tournament.
你怎么看 Russ?
What do you think, Russ?
我看如果那个妓♥女♥的尸体没被冲上岸的话
I think if that hooker hadn't washed up onshore
我现在还在PGA混得挺好
I'd still be working for the PGA.
美国职业高尔夫球协会
行吧咱们还是看看场上情况
All right. Let's go down to the field.
先发挥杆的是"拉拉"队的Collette选手
Teeing off first is Collette from team lesbian.
我靠
Oh, shit.
女同领先咯
Lesbians got game.
可不是你那平民高尔夫了吧斯蒂娃?
This ain't exactly ghetto golf, is it, Steve-a?
欢迎来玩点真的贱♥人♥
Welcome to the big leagues, bitch.
加油斯蒂娃
Come on, Steve-a Longoria.
你能做到的
You can do this.
斯蒂娃打中了18尺洞
Steve-a Longoria has sunk an 18-foot putt.
双方打成平手现在进入下半场
We are neck and neck going into the back nine.
看来拉拉们确实在各种洞之间游刃有余嘛
I guess lesbians really know their way around a hole.
当初真该把那妓♥女♥埋洞里而不是扔湖里
I wish I'd put that hooker in a hole instead of that lake.
马上回来
We'll be right back.
好消息 Malloy 我找到个手小的兽医
Good news, Malloy. I found a vet with small hands.
他...
He's a--
诶我去
Holy shit.
好吧我觉得我得去看医生了
Okay, I think it's time to go to the vet.
你咋想通了?
Oh, what changed your mind?
没办法熊孩子都拿我屁♥股♥当充气屋了
When kids started using my ass as a bounce house.
我说了脱鞋
I said take your shoes off.
如果这帮贱♥人♥真以为能阻止我进入他们的傲娇小团体
If these pricks think they can keep me out of their precious little club
他们可得三思了
Ooh, they better think again.
妈呀天杀的
God! Goddamn it!
你给我做俱乐部特♥供♥三明治现在立刻马上
You-- you're going to make me the special club sandwich right now.
但是先生 - 别逼逼赶紧做你大爷的
But, señor. - Make the sandwich, goddamn it.
好
Si.
首先我得拿面包
First I get the bread.
快点快点你特么给老子快点
Come on. Come on. Hurry the [bleep] up.
他们比完赛回来前我必须得走
I got to get out of here before the tournament ends.
接着我得拧开封口绳
Then I turn the twist tie.
拿来吧你
Give me that!
把配方给老子我自己做
Just give me the goddamn recipe. I'll make it myself.
面包西红柿培根鳄梨生菜蛋黄酱还有...
Bread, tomato, bacon, avocado, lettuce, mayo, and...
黑人
A black man.
人们还不知道我们俱乐部特♥供♥三明治的秘密配方呢
If people only knew that was the secret ingredient in our special club sandwich.
我好喜欢吃黑肉
Oh, I do enjoy the dark meat.
配上沙布利干白口感特别好
It pairs nicely with a crisp chablis.
要屎了他们要吃了Denzel
Holy shit, they're gonna eat Denzel.
现在是第18洞比分仍旧僵持不下
We are at the 18th hole, and the score is tied.
如果Denzel打进这个洞
If denzel makes this next putt
乡村俱乐部将会获得胜利比赛也将结束
Team country club will win and the match will be over.
那妓♥女♥忘记暗号♥时我的人生就注定完蛋了
My life was over after that hooker forgot her safe word.
永别了残酷世界
Farewell, cruel world.
你特么就一贱♥人♥
You're a [bleep] bitch.
咱们继续看比赛
And now more golf.
你特么要干啥 Steve?
What the hell are you doing, steve?
Denzel 听我说
Denzel, listen to me.
他们要把你放俱乐部里
They're going to put you in the club.
我当然在俱乐部里傻X
I am in the club, dumbass.
不是放特♥供♥三明治里
No, the club sandwich.
我刚听你所谓的朋友们说了
I just heard your so-called friends say
他们要把你杀了吃了
They're going to kill you and eat you.
你得赶紧离开这儿
You've got to get out of here!
为了能赢你还真什么都编得出来
Man, you'll make upanything to win
就为了保住你的拉拉朋友
Just so you can keep your new lesbian friends.
我不管这傻X比赛或者我的新朋友我更关心你
I care more about you than this stupid game or my new friends.
我证明给你看
I'll prove it to you.
看好了女士们我不是真正的女同
Attention, ladies. I'm not really a lesbian.
我是个爷们
I am a man.
真搞笑斯蒂娃
Oh, that's funny, steve-a.
你可长着一对儿上好咪♥咪♥呢
Tell that to those sweet tits of yours, huh?
好吧这是你自找的
Okay, you asked for it.
Steve 别