脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S02E01

Part 1 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:31 p.m.

脆莓公园十周年纪念洗版

真特么爽
Hell yeah!
这就完了? 得整个大家伙事儿呀
That's it? I guess I gotta pull out the big guns.
嘿你特么在那儿干嘛吗?
Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?
啥? 打渔呢傻X 我是火爆Jim 你大爷的
Huh? Fishing, dumbass! I'm Firecracker Jim, God damn it!
打渔? 用炸♥药♥?
Fishing? With dynamite?
是啊你给我签了许可的
Yeah. You signed the damn permit.
我可得开始读读那些玩意了
I need to start reading those things.
甭担心我是爆破专家来着
Don't worry. I'm an explosives expert.
卧♥槽♥
Shit!
上帝啊奇迹发生了
Oh, my God! It's a miracle!
你可真特么对我能抚摸我二弟了
You're damn right it is. I can touch my Peter!

脆莓公园
暗殇天主教堂
我们沉痛缅怀Edith
We're all gonna miss Edith.
有生之年能见到我的曾曾祖母我感到幸运万分
I feel so lucky that I got to know my great-great-grandmother.
感谢在座都能前来... - 等一下等一下
Thank you all for coming. I know... - Wait, wait, wait.
翻译白云苍狗
我要说几句
I'd like to say a few words.
翻译偏执绝非过错
Edith对我而言很特别
Edith was very special to me.
翻译井脑湿
每一次我俩甜蜜爱爱感觉都仿若初夜
Every time we made sweet love was like our first time
至少对她如此她老年痴呆
at least for her. She had Alzheimer's.
这货特么谁啊?
Who the [Bleep] is this guy?
她曾很喜欢我的诗
She used to love my poetry.
翻译旗木佐罗
还有一首献给你 Edith
Here's one more for you, Edith.
Edith有点种族主义
Edith was a little racist.
她说她不喜欢黑黑的脸庞
She said she did not like black faces.
但我的那根黑又硬她可是心心相映
But I had a black part that she loved with her heart
那玩意进出了五次她的肛肛
and that part broke her hip in five places.
漂亮真是漂亮
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
真遗憾 Denzel
I'm sorry, Denzel.
看来你对Edith的死确实感到很难过吧?
Looks like you're taking Edith's death pretty hard, huh?
才没有呢她都112岁了
What? No. She was 112 years old.
这老婊♥子♥早在三十年前就该死了
That bitch should've been dead 30 years ago.
我难过是因为我上过全世界最老的女人了
I'm sad because I made love to the oldest woman on Earth.
都已经玩过了以后可该怎么办呢?
I've done it all now. Where do I go from here?
去死?
Hell?
所谓重大消息是什么呢?
So, what's this big, important news?
是啊 Woody 我们要干什...
Yeah, Woody, what are we doing...
好诶
Yes!
上帝啊她又满血复活了
Oh, my God. She's completely healed.
而且疹子全没了
And my rash is gone.
我在想能不能治好婊♥子♥
I wonder if it cures bitch.
我想我的处♥女♥膜又长回来了
I think my hymen just grew back.
别担心大醉完就会又不见的
Don't worry. It'll be gone after happy hour.
林警们老Woody发现了这个奇迹
Rangers, old Woody has discovered a miracle.
正如你们所见这湖可以治愈任何疾病上到癌症下到感冒
As you can see, this lake cures any ailment, from the common cold to cancer.
你直接告诉我们不就完了
You could have just told us.
当然不过这种方式更好玩嘛
Yeah, sure, but this way was more fun.
你怎么确定一定有效呢?
How were you sure it would work?
Connie可能...
Connie could have...
这事我会玩顺手的
I could get used to this.
肯定会有一个科学解释的吧
There must be a scientific explanation.
是啊混球有解释
Yeah, asshole, there is.
我被上帝选中来治愈病患
I was chosen by God to heal the sick.
又一个不去相信上帝的理由
And another reason not to believe in God.
上帝做什么都喜欢神秘而现在他想让我发财
The Lord works in mysterious ways, and right now, he wants me to be rich.
得病失意发财吧啦吧啦吧啦
Sick people, lost souls, deep pockets, blah blah blah.
宗教就意味着赚钱这下我们可有事做了
Religion equals money! Now, we've got a lot of work to do.
做事? 你今天应该是要带我去滑雪的
Work? You were supposed to take me snowboarding today.
抱歉啦没空啦小萌萌
Sorry. No time, Cubbykins.
爸爸是上帝的代言人了我得琢磨怎么从中获利
Daddy is God's prophet now, and I do plan to profit.
是啊另一件会惹得一身骚的丑事
Yeah. Another scam that'll blow up in your face.
我想像Shaun White那样驰骋雪坡
I want to shred the slopes like Shaun White.
美国著名单板滑雪运动员
他凭这个得到了一堆丑女
He gets lots of ass for an ugly woman.
驰骋雪坡? 你压根没见过雪好不好
Shred the slope? You've never even seen snow.
等下你从来没见过雪?
Wait. You've never seen snow?
谁来给解释一下物种的差异性之熊类冬眠?
Could somebody explain to the diversity hire that bears hibernate?
这表示要睡很长的一觉 Denzel 你应该对此很熟悉了
That means sleep for a long time, Denzel, something you should be familiar with.
不要难为Denzel了
Take it easy on Denzel.
他今天过得不好...
He's had a rough day...
怎么了 Denzel?
What's wrong, Denzel?
打我小时候起我就有一个梦想
Ever since I was a little boy, I had a dream.
后来我实现了这个梦想
And then, I realized that dream.
而现在...
And now...
卧♥槽♥
Shit!
不好意思屁话什么的真心听不下去
Sorry, I couldn't listen to any more of that.
上帝啊要是没有那个复活湖我是得有多开心呀
God, this would be so much more satisfying if that lake wasn't there.
Connie Steve 去找那些病入膏肓轻信人言
Connie, Steve, go round up every sick, gullible
寂寞空虚傻里傻气还有那些有点存款的屌♥丝们
emotionally needy, dumbass, lonely loser with a bank account.
Denzel Ethel 带Malloy去山上滑雪
Denzel, Ethel, take Malloy up the mountain to snowboard.
赶紧的
Stat!
所以就这样了? 你要开♥发♥这个湖?
So, that's it? You're gonna exploit this lake?
开♥发♥这个湖并帮助那些病人和残废
Exploit the lake and help the sick and disabled.
想想他们重获新生后会做些什么吧
Imagine what they'll do with a new lease on life.
我滴神啊
Oh, my God!
亲爱的自打炸掉了胳膊腿之后我一直在想着做这事
Honey, ever since I blew my arms and legs off, I've been dying to do this.
天啊
Oh, Lord!
天爽
Oh, God, yeah.
Jim 上帝啊
Oh, Jim! Oh, Lord!
Jim
Oh, Jim!
见鬼 Malloy 你确定这些破烂都能派上用场?
Damn. Malloy, are you really gonna use all this junk?
你是不是要一路磨叽到山顶啊?
Are you really gonna bitch the whole way up this mountain?
好了快到了你个娇生惯养的小杂种
All right, almost there... You spoiled little shit.
你说我小什么? - 我说你小帽子不错
Little what'd you say? - I said, "nice hat."
噢谢谢哦
Oh, thank you.
好了到了
Okay, we're here.
看好了
Watch this.
得了我不会滑雪
All right. I can't snowboard.
更受不了这堆又白又冷的玩意儿
And I can't stand this white, cold stuff.
呃那是雪
Uh, that's snow.
这就是雪? 早说嘛
This is snow? You should've told me!
真无聊我们走吧
It sucks! Let's get out of here.
完了? 爬五个小时这就完事了?
That's it? A five-hour hike for that?
别逗乐了既然来了至少也得堆个雪人啥的才能走
No, uh-uh. We ain't leaving this spot till you build a snowman or some shit.
伙计们我这里有绳子
Guys, I found some rope.
你们或许会考虑在冻死之前把自己吊死
You'll probably want to hang yourself before you freeze to death.
没啥难度嘛
All right, this isn't so hard.
赞美耶稣并向您问早安
Praise Jesus and good morning!
请允许我们向您介绍奇迹之湖
We'd like to tell you about Miracle Lake.
赞美耶...
Praise jes...
赞美... 赞...
Praise... prai...
赞美耶稣并向您问早... - 先让我们说吧
Praise Jesus, and good mor... - Let me stop you right there.
我们是山达基教♥徒♥ - 进来吧我们给你们讲讲
We're Scientologists. - Come on in. We'll tell you about it.
又称科学神教和科学教派等新兴宗教之一
由美国科幻小说作家L•罗恩•贺伯特创立的信仰系统
快得了吧低能才会信山达基教我们不买♥♥你们的账
Oh, no, scientology is only for the weak-minded. We're not falling for that.
难以置信我们也是山达基教♥徒♥了
I can't believe we're Scientologists now.
别担心我想我们随时都可以脱离教会
Don't worry, I'm sure we can quit any time we want.
你们在这儿搞什么鬼?
What the hell are you doing here?
我们是来传播我们和平与爱的信息的
We're here to spread our message of peace and love.
想都别想
Oh, no, you don't!
先让我们传播我们和平与爱的信息衰鬼们
We're spreading our message of peace and love, you [Bleep]suckers!
"亚伯拉罕生以撒以撒生雅各"
"Abraham begat Isaac, Isaac begat Jacob."
而Woody"生"头疼
Woody "be-gatting" a headache!
上帝啊你写这狗屁不通的玩意搞毛?
God! Why the hell did you write this gibberish?
嘿 Malloy Ethel和Denzel跑哪去了?
Oh, hey, Malloy. Where's Ethel and Denzel?
在冰窟窿里等着冻死呢
Freezing to death in an ice cave.
冰窟窿不错
Ice cave, that's nice.
早上好兄弟姐♥妹♥们♥
Good morning, brothers and sisters!