脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S03E06

Part 1 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:32 p.m.

脆莓公园十周年纪念洗版

褐丘小学
孩子们为了纪念退伍军人节
Now, kids, in honor of Veterans Day
我们有请到了一位特邀发言人
We've got a very special guest speaker.
一位我们身边的战争英雄
A real, live war hero:
Woody Johnson
Woody Johnson.
嗨孩子们她没骗人我就是战争英雄
Hi, kids, she's right. I am a war hero.
我爸爸是消防员
My dad's a fireman.
你♥爸♥真娘炮
Your dad is a pussy.
当你们老爸忙着抽他们的大♥麻♥ 洗他们的弱逼
While your fathers were all smoking doobies and washing out their vaginas
老子可在为你们的自♥由♥战屎沙场呢
I was in the shit fighting for your freedom...
当然除了带着丁丁•侯赛因去玩伊♥拉♥克♥婊♥子♥以外
When I wasn't giving Iraqi whores my Veiny Hussein-y.
您能直接跳到为什么获得奖章那部分吗?
Can you skip to the part where you got your medal?
这就说到了婊♥子♥
I'm getting to that, bitch.
我所在的精英特种兵小队名叫"红骷髅"
I was in an elite special ops unit called the Red Skulls.
一天我们正在执行巡逻任务
One day when we were on patrol
我的队友列兵Jackubowski 中弹受伤
a fellow soldier, Private Jackubowski, got wounded.
我救了他一命
I saved his life.
我拖着那半死不活的混♥蛋♥一路跑了三英里的战事沙漠
I dragged that half-dead bastard over three miles of war-torn desert.
实在是英勇可嘉
It was a truly brave act.
这位士兵是怎么受伤的?
How did the soldier get hurt?
你咋回事诉讼代理嘛?
What are you, the [bleep] hague?
时间过去这么久了
It was a long time ago.
我哪能记住那么多细节
Like I can remember all the details.
现在我们就是一辈子的结拜兄弟了
Now we are blood brothers for life.
要一直做彼此的天使
We'll always have each others' backs.
红骷髅肝胆相照
Red skulls! Respect and protect!
你机会来了
Oh, there you go.

脆莓公园
♢ 旗木 ♢ 偏执绝非过错
♢ 井脑湿 ♢ 白云苍狗联合译制
Steve 你特么太逗逼了
Steve, you're a funny mother [bleep].
乐成这副屌♥样你也是嗑嗨了
You'd have to be high to laugh at that.
我就不能不嗑是吧? 净瞎扯
I'm always high, huh? That's messed up.
4:20咯
It's 4:20!
听好了林警们
All right, rangers.
我就说他很逗逼
I told you he was funny.
Steve 我帮你
Steve, let me help you up.
坏消息林警们
Bad news, rangers.
今年圣诞节你们拿不到奖金了
You won't be receiving Christmas bonuses this year.
我去 - 啥玩意?
Oh, man. - What?
反正哪年我都没拿到过
I never get one anyway.
谁让你是同性恋 Connie 天呐
Well, that's because you're a lesbian, Connie! Jeez!
那我们剩下几个人呢? 指着那钱活命的好吧
What about the rest of us? We were counting on that money.
为了修缮公园我也只能挪用奖金了
Well, I had to use the money to renovate the park.
此处"公园"是指我们的房♥子
By park, he means our cabin.
太荒唐了
This is ridiculous.
你跟Malloy已经住豪邸了
You and Malloy already live in a mansion
我们可都还窝在破棚子里呢
while we're stuck in run-down shacks.
消停草民
Silence, peasant.
我是老大再难的决定我也得拿主意
I'm the boss and I have to make hard decisions
比如我就得决定房♥子的侧厅是用樱桃木还是红木地板
like deciding if I wanted cherry or mahogany floors in the new wing of my cabin.
咋地吧
Suck it!
要知道 Woody和我是上等阶层
You see, Woody and I are upper class.
不用高逼格的东西会死的
We can't survive without nice things
例如这款真熊毛夹克
like this jacket made of real bear fur.
听着我的心也不是石头做的
Look, I don't have a heart of stone.
我都张罗着办一场庆祝翻新的暖房♥派对呢
I'm even having a housewarming party to celebrate our renovations
我... 希望你们都能到场
and I want you all there.
这混账
What a dick.
敬我们的老房♥完成扩建:
Here's to our cabin's new addition:
圣诞节奖金屋
the Christmas bonus room.
敬这百分之一的阶级
To the one percent.
这派对纯属扯淡
This party is a bunch of bullshit.
是啊 Woody有必要整个室内雪景出来么?
Yeah, did Woody really have to spring for indoor snow?
穷逼才玩雪呢那是可♥卡♥因♥
Snow is for poor people. That's cocaine.
你好哇雪嗨子
Hello, Frosty the Blow Man.
恶搞动画片《雪孩子Frosty the Snowman》
堕天使大战
Eight ball fight!
爽诶
All right!
Woody 你的老战友们来了
Woody, your war buddies are here.
嘿蹦跶哥死瘸子左撇子
Hey! It's Hoppy, Gimpy, and Lefty.
你们的伤势正配得上你们的外号♥ 多有意思啊
Isn't it funny how you guys got injuries that matched your nicknames?
话说红骷髅战队就你一个家伙毫发无损这事儿够诡异
It's odd how you were the only red skull who made it out without a single injury.
看来英雄人物不光比一般人英勇
Well, I guess heroes aren't just braver than normal people
还更幸运呢
they're also luckier.
可别忘了我救过Jackubowski
Don't forget, I saved Jackubowski.
敬Jackubowski
To Jackubowski.
红骷髅肝胆相照
Red skulls! Respect and protect!
你用这玩意打飞机嘛?
Do you jerk off with that thing?
估计跟迅猛龙给人打飞机一个滋味儿
I'll bet it's like getting a hand job from a velociraptor.
美国内政部
那些个猪头 "上层"个卵
Those pigs. They don't have class.
他们压根就不懂什么叫"上层"
They don't even know what class is.
我去废伏特加
Ooh, trash vodka.
你在这儿上班吗?
Do you work here?
很不幸我大学半路辍了所以是的
Unfortunately, I didn't finish college, so yes.
我要立刻见到林警头子Woody Johnson
I need to see head ranger Woody Johnson at once.
干啥?
Why?
因为我是新任内政部秘♥书♥长♥
Because I'm the new Secretary of the Interior.
你老大的老大
I'm your boss' boss.
真不想害他惹上麻烦才怪
Oh, I'd hate to get him into trouble.
上次玩可♥卡♥因♥天使还是小屁孩的时候
I haven't made a coke angel since I was a kid.
我去 Jorge说搞点丑逼妓♥女♥过来
Man, Jorge said he was sending over some ugly whores
真心没开玩笑啊
And he wasn't joking.
不过看你这样给上两拳问题不大
At least you look like you can take a punch.
咱速炮速决小心可♥卡♥因♥丁丁哆嗦回去...
Well, let's get this over with before the coke dick sets in
搞得咱们两边儿都尴尬
And makes it awkward for both of us.
嘿 Woody 这几个丑逼妓♥女♥给你撂哪?
Hey, Woody, where should I put these ugly whores?
慢着你要不是Jorge的丑妓♥女♥
Wait, if you're not one of Jorge's homely hookers
你特么是谁?
Who the hell are you?
是你老大
She's your boss
新任内政部秘♥书♥长♥
The new Secretary of the Interior.
咋地吧
Suck it.
能解释一下这儿是什么状况嘛 Johnson先生?
Care to explain what's going on here, Mr. Johnson?
那个... 是恭候您大驾的派对啊
Uh, this is all a party in your honor.
惊喜
Surprise!
嗨一下?
Key bump?
我们来谈一些重要的事务
Let's talk about something important.
咖啡给我放下
Put that coffee down.
你以为我跟你瞎逼闹呢?
Do you think I'm [bleep] with you?
我没跟你瞎逼闹
I am not [bleep] with you.
你也敢叫自己林警? 你个狗♥娘♥养♥的?
You call yourself a ranger, you son of a bitch?
吓尿了
I peed.
你是我这辈子见过林警圈里最烂的一个
You are the sorriest excuse for rangers I've ever seen
老娘干这行足有十五年了
And I've been in this business for 15 years.
敢问大名? - 去你♥妈♥的♥
What's your name? - [bleep] you.
就叫这个
That's my name.
是韩文名吗?
Is that Korean?
脆莓是全美最操蛋的公园没有之一
Brickleberry is the worst park in the country.
奥斯维辛集中营也特么比这儿有好评
Fucking auschwitz would get a better yelp review.
在这个垃圾堆有所改观之前
I'm here to turn this dump around
我都会一直坐镇这里
And I'm not leaving until I do.
"改观"绝非一句空话
There are going to be changes.
第一步药检
Number one: Drug tests.
过去跟这儿干得很开心我会想你们大家的拜拜
It's been a pleasure working here. I'm gonna miss all of y'all. Bye-bye.
接下来轮到Woody Johnson了
That brings us to Woody Johnson.
你连在鸡鸡工厂里口♥爆♥的活都干不好
You couldn't manage a blow job in a dick factory.
鸡鸡工厂? 是制♥造♥鸡鸡的工厂还是用鸡鸡制♥造♥成的工厂?
Dick factory? Is that where they make dicks, or is it a factory made out of dicks?
闭嘴痴呆
Shut up, you idiot!
我真该炒了你这肥♥逼♥
I should fire your fat ass.
不要请再给我一次机会吧
No! Please give me another chance.
我知道这公园很操蛋但我有改变现状的良方