脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S03E11

Part 3 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:32 p.m.

Watch this, Malloy.
叫你呢
Hey, you!
整到他了
Got him.
他们不可能找到这儿来的 - 谁在找你?
They'll never find me here. - Who won't find you?
快快报♥警♥
Quick, call the cops.
你就是警♥察♥好吧 - 哦对
You are the cops. - Oh, yeah.
Briggs 快派增援来
Briggs, send backup.
这些飞车党会宰了我的
These bikers are gonna kill me.
那我正好如愿以偿
I was hoping they might.
没人会帮你的头警
You're on your own, top cop.
别担心宝贝儿
Don't worry, baby.
很快你就会回到我温暖甜蜜的菊花里来
Soon you'll be back in my sweet, sweet ass.
后♥庭♥拉珠
你爆了我们的会所
You blew up our clubhouse.
现在轮到我们口♥爆♥你了
And now we're gonna blow you.
我日啊 Rodney 我们都说好了
God damn it, Rodney! We talked about this.
我们要宰了他然后再口♥爆♥?
We're gonna kill him. Then blow him?
不
No!
这些飞车党真特么够奇葩
These are some weird-ass [Bleep] bikers.
送你上西天吧猪崽子
Time to die, porky.
等一下我还你们一个会所怎么样?
Wait, what if I replace your clubhouse?
拿什么还? - 这个地方如何?
With what? - How about this place?
只要你让我活命林警站就归你们了
If you let me live, you can have the ranger station.
风水倒是不错
Hmm, nice feng shui.
空阔式设计砖结构裸墙
Open concept, exposed brick.
成交
You got a deal.
猪崽子又可以苟活一天
I guess the piggy gets to live another day
但仍要好好调♥教♥调♥教♥
but he still needs to learn a lesson.
他又去哪了?
Where'd he go?
我正调♥教♥他呢老大
I'm teaching him a lesson, boss.
调♥教♥得我好舒服
It's a good one.
撒旦闺蜜帮机车会所2
你想要咱公园犯罪率升高现在满意了吧 Steve
Well, you wanted more crime in the park. You got it, Steve.
对不起大家全都怪我咯
Sorry, guys. This is all my fault.
要不我们重新找个公园干活吧
Maybe we should just find a new park to work at.
听说游乐园在招人呢
I hear Six Flags is hiring.
别那么怂好吧 Steve 你爹会怎么说?
Oh, don't be a pussy, Steve. What would your dad say?
是啊 Steve 这个公园是我们的辖区
Yeah, Steve, this park is our jurisdiction.
我们就是这里的警♥察♥
We're the cops here.
对逮捕他们是我们的责任
Yeah, and it's up to us to bust them.
能觐见教皇我真激动啊 Malloy
Ooh, I'm so excited to meet the pope, Malloy.
Malloy? - Woody 我的孩子
Malloy? - Woody, my son.
噢嘿好啊上帝
Oh, hey, what up, Jesus?
今天觐见教皇的时候
When you meet the pope today
他有可能会把你关起来然后扔掉牢房♥钥匙
there's a chance he may lock you up and throw away the key.
他为啥要那样做? - 那倒不重要
Why would he do that? - That's not important.
你只管记得告诉他们
Just remember to tell them
你的熊宝宝跟这个骗局没有任何关系
that your bear cub had nothing to do with this scheme.
骗局? 什么骗局?
Scheme? What scheme?
通话完毕孩子 - Malloy
Over and out, my son. - Malloy!
你骗了我
You tricked me.
这一切都是谎言吗？
This whole thing is a lie?
该死的
Holy shit.
教皇会把我们送到梵蒂冈监狱的
The pope will probably send us to vatican prison.
我们得抓紧逃走
We got to get out of here.
教皇殿下现在要见你
His excellency will see you now.
蕾妮•齐薇格在这里干嘛?
What the hell is Renee Zellweger doing here?
《BJ单身日记》女主角
嘿那是我老爸
Hey! That's my dad.
还给我
Give that back.
早该认清我成不了警♥察♥
I should've known I couldn't be a cop.
抱歉不能让你感到骄傲了老爸
I'm sorry I couldn't make you proud, dad.
你每天都让我骄傲儿子
You make me proud every day, son.
老爸?
Dad?
你和我一样都是脆莓公园的林警
You're a brickleberry ranger just like I was.
做父亲的还能要求什么呢?
What more could a father ask?
你在这里不觉得无聊吗?
Didn't you ever get bored here?
如果无聊了我就会躲到树丛后面...
If I did, I'd just go behind a bush
打飞机
and masturbate.
好吧
Okay.
儿子为你自己感到骄傲吧
Son, be proud of yourself and what you are
你是脆莓公园的林警
a brickleberry park ranger.
现在去把你的公园夺回来
Now, get out there and take your park back
如果要找我
and if you need me
我就在树丛后面打飞机
I'll be jacking off behind that bush.
遵命
Yes, sir.
塑身裤
不珍惜我的工作是错的
I was wrong for not appreciating my job.
诚然当林警既无聊又差劲
Sure, being a park ranger can be boring and lame
还有极高的风险得上莱姆病
and put you at a high risk for lyme disease.
一种以蜱为媒介的感染性疾病
你这一说我也不想干了
Now you got me wanting to quit.
抱歉脑子烧坏了你知道我有莱姆病的
Oh, sorry. Fog brain. You know I have lyme disease.
现在我有个计划能把那些混♥蛋♥赶出去
Now, I've got a plan to get these a-holes out of our park.
抱歉走神了我有莱姆病
Sorry, I was zoning out. I have lyme disease.
我们知道咱都有莱姆病好吧
We know. We all got lyme disease.
上我不要钱
Ethel一直留着这个中学的牌子实在太好了
It's a good thing Ethel kept that sign from middle school.
肯定有个神秘的崇拜者知道今天是我生日
I must have a secret admirer who remembered my birthday.
卧♥槽♥ 狼立方我就怕这个
A cube of wolves, my only fear!
你确定这会管用?
Are you sure this will work?
当然了这内♥裤♥你都穿了十天了
Yeah, you've been wearing them for ten straight days.
我的肺要熔掉了
Feels like my lungs are melting.
你好孩子我听了许多关于你的事情
Greetings, my son. I have heard a lot about you.
教皇先生我有个事情要坦白
Uh, Mr. Pope, sir, I got something to confess.
就是这个什么痔稣不是真的
This thing, hemorrhoid Jesus, it's not real.
我知道 - 你知道? 怎么知道的?
I know that. - You do? How?
因为这一切都是假的
Because none of it's real.
宗教就是编出来的童话故事
Religion's all a made-up fairy tale.
如果全都是编出来的那信教有什么意义?
Well, if it's all made up, what's the point of the church?
票子一切都是为了票子
Money. It's always been about money.
♪ 票子票子票子票子 ♪
♪ Money, money, money, money ♪
♪ - 票子票子 - 怎么? ♪
♪ - Money, money, huh - What? ♪
♪ - 票子票子 - 耶 ♪
♪ - Money, money, uh - Yeah ♪
♪ - 票子票子 - 怎么? ♪
♪ - Money, money, muh - What? ♪
♪ - 票子票子 - 来吧 ♪
♪ - Money, money, huh, uh, huh - get down ♪
要是哪个贱♥货♥敢刮教会的钱教皇会非常不爽
And the pope gets really angry when some punk bitch steals what's his.
我可没这么做过 - 你当然有了
I'd never do that. - Oh, you did do that.
天主教♥徒♥ 我是指大部分墨西哥人都跑去看你的痔疮
Catholics, mostly mexicans, are flocking to see your hemorrhoid
而不是去教堂了
instead of going to church
去教堂少了就意味着捐款少了
and less church attendance is less money.
知道那些动了教皇票子的人是什么下场吗?
And you know what happens to people who screw with the pope's money?
用薄薄的尺子打手腕吗?
Slap on the wrist with a flimsy ruler?
是升♥天♥
They die.
能给我侄女签个名吗? 她有一半墨西哥血统
Could you sign this for my niece? She's half mexican.
我要把这些人带到警署去
I guess I'll take these guys down to the police station.
慢着 Williams
Not so fast, Williams.
把这些畜生带到警署的人是我
I'll be the one taking these lowlifes in.
端掉撒旦闺蜜帮会让局长对我另眼相看
Taking down the Satan's bffs will impress the chief so much
他会让重回头警宝座的
he'll make me top cop again.
我们会告诉局长这根本不是你的功劳
We'll tell the chief you had nothing to do with it.
不可能因为我会把你们全都打死
No, you won't, because I'm gonna put a bullet in all of you.
然后说是这些飞车党干的
I'll just say the bikers did it.
抱歉来晚了我...
Sorry I'm late. I--
嘿这是谁的小裤裤?
hey, whose panties are these?
好了该废掉这帮家伙了
All right, time to waste these guys.
别动 FBI
Freeze! FBI!
别动 DEA
No, you freeze. DEA.
美国禁毒署
美国烟草火器与爆♥炸♥物管理局
谁也不许动 ATF
Everybody freeze. ATF.
该死这里还有谁是卧底吗?
Damn, is anybody else here undercover?
这里有真的飞车党吗?
So was anybody here a real biker?
不是 - 不是 - 我也不是
No. - No. - Nope. - Me neither.
所以过去十年我们又是吸毒又是杀人