脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S03E04

Part 3 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:32 p.m.

好啦之前我对你确实狠了点但...
Okay, look, I was a little hard on you, but...
现在我觉得咱俩扯平了
I'd say we're even now.
随你怎么说
Whatever.
靠啊我不知道这钩子怎么装饵
Oh, damn it. I don't know how to bait this hook.
这样就行了
Here you go.
你爹从来没带你钓过鱼?
Didn't your dad ever take you fishing?
只有一次那个妓♥女♥花了一整晚
Only once, and it took that hooker all night
才把她双拳深深插♥进♥我...
To get her fists deep up my--
哦你问"钓鱼"啊
Oh, "fishing."
没没带过
No, he didn't.
钓到了钓到了
Oh, I got one. I got one!
别放跑了快收线
Oh, get him! Reel him in!
快上来了
I got him.
我们成功了
We got him.
干得好儿子这鱼真不错
Good job, son. This a nice fish.
它咬我
He bit me.
靠操翻这死鱼
Man, [bleep] that fish.
哎哟我的腿
Ouch! My leg!
你们特么...
You goddamn--
天呐
Oh, my god.
我就知道
I knew it.
她杀了派特•萨加克还分尸了
She killed Pat Sajak and chopped him up.
我看不见呢
I'm not seeing that.
我勒个去 Ethel死了
Oh, my god. Ethel's dead!
那你特么是谁?
Then who the hell are you?
我才是Ethel
I'm Ethel.
你是Ethel的话我肯定是...
Then if you're Ethel, I must be...
派特•萨加克
Pat Sajak!
我脸上肯定戴了面罩
So this is a mask!
粘得还真牢哇
It's stuck on there pretty good.
好也许动刀就可以了
Okay, maybe this knife will help.
爽
Oh, yeah.
好哎割下来了割下来了
Okay, it's working! It's working!
我不是派特•萨加克我是骷髅哥
I'm not Pat Sajak! I'm a skeleton!
白种人这梗现在我懂了
White people, now I get it!
本周末父子野餐会
你还好么 Woody?
Hey, uh, everything cool, Woody?
还好就是...
Yeah. It's just...
其实有人周末要办父子野餐会
Well, they're having a father-son picnic this weekend
我感觉好难过
and it makes me sad.
难过他们都把广♥告♥打到酒吧来了?
That they have to advertise these things in bars?
不是是因为有一次我爹答应带我去野餐
No, because my dad promised to take me to one once
但根本没露面
But he never showed.
都怪我没给那狗♥日♥的♥植物掸灰
If only I'd dusted that [bleep] plant.
嘿不如这样
Hey, you know what?
我带你去参加父子野餐会好了
I'll take you to the father-son picnic.
你真的肯带我去?
You'd really do that for me?
我还是想买♥♥你的黑奴
I still want to buy your slave.
就是他 - 他不是黑奴
Him. - He's not a slave!
他是我爸
He's my father.
不好九点半了
Uh-oh. It's 9:30.
妈咪让我九点前回家的
Mommy told me to be home at 9:00.
别担心你妈现在可是老爹的亲子时间
Don't worry about your mama. This is father-and-son time.
咱们齐心协力开了这王八蛋的脑袋
Now let's bash this mother[bleep]'s skull in together
亲子时间
Father-son time!
嘘我妈是羊羊
Shh. My mom's a sheep.
我说"是羊羊"了? 其实我想说"睡觉觉"
Did I say "sheep"? I meant to say "asleep."
Woodrow 你没按时回来喔
Woodrow, you missed your curfew.
我该怎么惩罚你呢?
What am I going to do with you?
我有个主意
I got an idea.
派特等着看我准备的惊喜吧
Oh, Pat, have I got a surprise for you.
请别告诉我你还有"正面小派"
Please don't tell me there's a front Pat.
你觉得如何?
What do you think?
现在你可以跟我永远活在游戏里了
Now you can live the game with me forever.
幸...
Wheel...
运...
Of...
轮
Fortune!
天呐
Oh, my god!
Connie绑♥架♥了一个隆帕小矮人
Connie kidnapped an oompa loompa!
《查理的巧克力工厂》中喜爱巧克力的小矮人
那是派特•萨加克你个傻缺
That's Pat Sajak, you idiot.
也对小矮人没那么矮颜色也没那么橙
Right. Oompa loompas aren't that short and orange.
我报♥警♥吧
I'm calling the cops.
报♥警♥的话派特就没命了
If you do that, Pat Sajak will die.
你们的朋友Connie已经疯了
Your friend Connie has snapped.
如果你们想要救他的命就得照我说的做
If you want to save his life, you will do as I say.
你哪位? - 请叫我"谣言扩散器"
Who are you? - Name's Buzz Buzzer.
我是真人秀《人♥质♥》的洽谈人
I'm a professional game show "host-age" negotiator.
话说当红竞赛节目主持人经常被绑♥架♥吗?
How often are popular game show hosts held hostage?
超乎你想象 2012年《家庭骗局》
More than you think. 2012, Family Feud.
1976年开播的家庭对抗节目
你以为主持人理查德•道森是自然死亡吗?
You think Richard Dawson died of natural causes?
2006年《强棒出击》
2006, Press Your Luck.
1983年开播的综艺节目
你以为彼得•汤玛肯是退休了?
You think Peter Tomarken retired?
《美国舞台》节目主持人去世原因实为心脏病
迪克•克拉克遭绑♥架♥杀害后被抛尸在了七个地方
Dick Clark was kidnapped and killed on seven separate occasions.
我们只能去找一些像他的人去主持
We had to keep tracking down look-alikes.
所谓中风去世的那位
By the time he had the stroke
其实是第十任迪克了
We were on our tenth Dick.
听来Ethel这周末约炮前戏缓慢呀
Sounds like Ethel on a slow weekend.
顺便说下好奶奶给我买♥♥的骚车
Gam-gam bought me this, by the way.
回见了傻X们
See you later, assholes.
该死 Woody
Damn, Woody.
你要是再不挺起腰板儿
That woman's never going to stop treating you like a child
那娘们会一辈子拿你当孩子
unless you stand up for yourself.
霸气点老子可不是养怂逼的
Be a man. I raised you better than that.
知道吗老爹? 你说得对
You know what, dad? You're right.
是时候挺起我的腰板儿了
It is time for me to stand up for myself.
那帮傻X鸟把我的筋给挑了
Those [bleep] birds ate my hamstrings.
一旦进去装成是选手玩游戏就好
Once you're in, just act like contestants and play the game.
等Connie赢了趁她高兴分神
When Connie wins, the euphoria will distract her.
你抓住萨加克赶紧往外跑
Then you grab sajak and get out.
如果这畜生输了
If the crimson beast loses
游戏结束
Game over.
Anita 你儿子有话对你说
Anita, your son has something to say to you.
想说啥?
What is it?
您是全宇宙最美丽的妈咪拜
Uh, you are the prettiest mommy in the whole world. Bye.
Woody 跟她说
Woody, tell her.
好吧好吧
All right, all right.
妈咪你让杀人蜂和嗜血乌鸦咬我
Uh, mommy, when you let africanized bees and bloodthirsty crows attack me
这是不对的我...
It's not nice, and I--
我不想你再这么做了
I don't want you to do that anymore.
我不知道诶
Oh, I had no idea.
要是用这生锈的车链子抽你你高兴了不?
Would it make you feel any better if I whipped you with a rusty bicycle chain?
诶呀上帝啊
Oh, Jesus Christ!
你是你怂恿他这么做的
And you! You put him up to this.
你把我儿子带坏了
You're a bad influence on my son.
少特么这么和我说话老娘们
Don't you talk that way to me, woman.
贱♥人♥ 你以为全世界就你趁车链子吗?
Bitch, you think you're the only one with a bicycle chain?
我猜有个e
I'd like to buy an e.
我爱派特的南瓜头
你不会真以为我会和你玩这个疯狂游戏吧?
You don't really expect me to play along with this insanity, do you?
干嘛不
Yeah.
难不成你想要我切下你的脸喂给背面小派吃
Unless you want me to cut off your face and feed it to back-pat.
有没有e呢?
Do we have any es?
Steve? Ethel?
Steve? Ethel?
你们来《幸运轮》现场干啥?
What are you doing on Wheel of Fortune?
我们来参加比赛呀 Connie
We're here to play the game, Connie.
不好意思 Gary Charlene
Sorry, Gary. Sorry, Charlene.
你们时间到了感谢参与
Your time is up. Thanks for playing.
都特么给我去死吧
Goddamn mother[bleep]!
救命我这么土豪这么叼不能死啊我可是派特•萨加克啊
Help me, please! I'm too rich and important to die. I'm Pat [bleep] Sajak.