恋爱手册（2014）

A to Z S01E13

Part 3 April 9, 2021, 4:41 p.m.

这招有效
It works.
DJ 迪内希博士
被选为洛杉矶最佳年轻DJ之一
迪内希赞
Dinesh, man!
安德鲁你知道迪内希其实是...
Hey, Andrew, did you realize that Dinesh is actually --
泽尔达的前男友亲她了
Zelda's ex-boyfriend kissed her.
揍人时间到我们走
It's beatdown time. Let's ride.
好了书呆子们我们走我们走
All right, nerds! Let's go! Let's go!
我们要组织一个小分队
Puttin' together a posse
给调戏泽尔达的人点颜色看看
to rough up a dude that put the moves on Zelda.
你们谁加入
Which one of you are in?
我
I am.
我直接冲上去毁掉这个人...
I will straight up destroy that guy...
的信用记录
's credit.
只要把他指给我看
Just point him out,
我就可以使尽解数嘲讽他
and I will rain down taunts on him...
在安全范围之内
from a safe distance.
-我们走 -或者不走
- Let's ride. - Or not.
好
Whoo! yeah!
-走起来 -不过我们应该开两辆车
- Circle the copters! - We should take two cars, though,
因为我的雅力士载不下所有人
because I don't think we can all fit in my Yaris.
对说真的应该有人开车
Yeah, seriously, somebody else should drive.
我一整天都在喝酒
I've been drinking all day.
玛德琳你有时间吗
Hey, Madeline. Uh, do you have a minute?
有我正在做我上飞机前的
Yeah. I was just getting in last-minute workout
最后一次锻炼
before my flight.
我决定早一天离开
I decided to leave a day early.
那...
Uh, so...
我知道你跟安德鲁的对话有点诡异
Um, I know that you had a weird conversation with Andrew,
而我只想... 不好意思
and I just wanted to -- I'm so sorry.
你能上来说话吗
Can you come up?
对如果安德鲁觉得我只是来这里
Yeah, I don't really wanna be around
想跟他重新开始那我不是很想留在这
if Andrew thinks I'm just here to try to get him back.
他跟你说的话的一部分...
Yeah, when he said that, um, some of it...
好吧所有话都是出自我口
Okay, all of it came from me.
我以为你是为了抢我男朋友而来
I thought that you were here to steal him.
对你差不多说对了
Yeah, you pretty much nailed it.
你说什么
Excuse me?
自打我订婚泡汤之后我真的很寂寞
After my engagement ended, I was really lonely,
我想也许我能回来重新跟安德鲁在一起
and I thought I could just come back here and get Andrew.
真有意思你居然察觉到了这点
It's so funny that you sensed that.
对啊很有意思
Yes. Isn't it?
伙计们这主意很糟糕
Guys, this is a terrible idea.
安德鲁如果有人搭讪你女朋友
Andrew, if a dude hits on your girl,
他就是搭讪了我们所有人的女朋友
he hits on all of our girls.
你们都没有女朋友
None of you have girls.
这是我们的选择我们不想被女人束缚
That's a choice. We don't want to be tied down.
现在我的音乐就是我的女朋友
Right now, my beats are my girlfriend.
我在街上跟人碰撞
I bump into people on the street
只为了感受身体接触
just to feel physical contact.
你吓坏我了你先在小分队试用
You're creeping me out. You're on posse probation.
好了我们到了
All right, here we are.
你们准备好监狱游了吗
Hoo! You guys ready to go to jail?!
没有
No.
杰给我滚出来
Jay! Get the hell out here!
这是你最后一次
This is the last time
舌吻安德鲁的女朋友
you tongue Andrew's girlfriend in the mouth.
斯图我们真不需要这么做
Stu, we really don't have to do this.
安德鲁
Andrew?
怎么回事
What's going on here?
我来告诉你怎么回事长官
I'll tell you what's going on here, sir.
你为这个国家英勇服务
You have served our country honorably,
你有权跟你喜欢的
and you have earned the right
任意一个人的女朋友亲热
to make out with anybody's girlfriend that you want.
只要我在拉斯维加斯的哈克山俱乐部打碟
Yes, and here is a V.I.P. pass to club Hakkasan in Las Vegas
-您就是贵宾 -搞什么
- for whenever I'm spinning. - What?
这里是崭新的40块忠诚永远
And here is a crisp 40 bucks. You know, semper fi.
哥们我...不是真正的海军
You guys, I'm -- I'm not a real marine.
这只是为了上《购物街》节目[猜价格游戏]
This is just to get on "The price is right."
他们总挑军队的人
They always pick guys in the military.
所以你亲了别人的女朋友
So you kiss other people's girlfriends
还为上娱乐节目而撒谎
and you lie to get on game shows.
-拜托你就是个... -天才
- I mean, come on. You're a -- - A genius.
那我们进去喝杯酒
So let's go in there, have some drinks.
然后我们就去军需用品店
Then we'll hit the army navy store.
然后去赢得摩托艇啦
And then we'll go win us some jet skis.
你们在...
What are you...
我想要个真空吸尘器
I wanna get a vacuum cleaner.
-最烂的小分队 -闭嘴
- The worst posse ever. - Shut up!
我开雅力士回去
I'm taking the Yaris!
要知道这不是针对你
Just know that it wasn't personal.
我知道
Oh, yeah, I know.
在看到安德鲁为了你俩挺身而出时
The minute Andrew stood up for his relationship with you
我看到他有多关心你
and I saw how much he cared about you,
我立即撤了
I immediately pulled back.
如果不撤你会作何表现
What does not pulling back look like?
你懂的比方说露个半胸
Oh, you know -- like, side boob,
暗示性地舔棒棒糖
and licking lollipops suggestively.
对我懂的
Yeah. no, I know.
棒棒糖
Lollipops.
我猜这就是我那么难忘记他的原因
I guess that's why he was so tough to get over.
当我们相遇的时候感觉那么
I mean, when we met, it just seemed...
-不同 -怎么不同
- different. - How so?
我当时住在旧金山
Well, I was living in San Francisco,
我在机场和他一见钟情
and I locked eyes with this guy at the airport.
一周后我搬去洛杉矶
Then a week later, I moved to L.A.,
我在一家咖啡店他出现了
and I'm in a coffee shop, and there he is.
对我而言这只是一场奇妙的巧合
To me, it just seemed like an amazing coincidence,
可他说这是命中注定
but he said that it was meant to be.
好吧等等
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, wait.
这不是你们第一次约会时安德鲁对你说的
So...isn't that what Andrew said to you on your first date,
你们的相遇是命中注定吗
about how you guys met?
对
Yep.
不厚道
Not cool.
你在这里干什么
What are you doing here?
你在这里干什么
What are you doing here?
我早退去收拾你前男友了
I left work early to go beat up your ex-boyfriend,
现在我要加班赶上工作进度
and now I am catching up on some work.
你收拾了杰
You beat up Jay?
你知道他撒谎
Did you know that he lies
才上了娱乐节目吗
to get onto game shows?
还有他还非常能抢别人的死党
And he is a full-on posse stealer.
我能说什么呢
Well, what can I say?
看来我就喜欢虚伪的男人
It seems I am drawn to deceptive men.
你是在指我吗
Are you...referring to me?
对
Yeah.
这不是明摆着的吗
You know, the guy that I --
就是我和玛德琳
and Madeline, apparently --
都命中注定的那个人
was meant to be with.
你对多少女人说过这话
How many women have you said that to?
这是你的泡妞技巧吗
Is that your move?
用宇宙来当你的泡妞搭档
You just use the universe as your wingman?
不泽尔达
No. Zelda...
听着
Look, um...
我认为我对她说这句话的时候是真心的
I thought I meant that when I said it to her,
可我对你说这句话的时候也是真心的
but I know I mean it when I say it to you.
好的好的
Right. Okay.
直到缘分已尽
Until it doesn't work out,
你对下一个姑娘说这句话时也是真心的
and then you really mean it with the next girl.
别这样泽尔达不会有下一个
Oh, come on, Zelda. There's not gonna be a next girl.
好吧抱歉你得明白
Okay, but I'm sorry, you can see