恋爱手册（2014）

A to Z S01E13

Part 2 April 9, 2021, 4:41 p.m.

Plus, I get to miss my stepdaughter's dance recital,
她太没天赋了
and she is talentless.
好吧
Okay.
这真是好主意帮玛德琳相亲
This was a great idea, setting Madeline up.
-她和... -杰
- Her and, um... - Jay.
-真的很合得来 -是的
- Jay are really hitting it off. - Yeah.
我可为女生们留意着呢
Well, I'm just looking out for us ladies,
-你知道我在说什么吗 -我听到了
- you know what I'm saying? - I hear that.
他非常可爱是不是
He's pretty cute, though. Isn't he?
是的如果你喜欢扁平屁♥股♥
Yeah, if you like flat asses.
怎么男人就不能批评对方吗
What? Guys can't be critical of each other?
你是怎么认识他的
How do you know him anyway?
是... 是...
with a -- with the...
天哪杰刚刚告诉我
Oh, my gosh. Hey, Jay was just telling me
你们俩曾经约会过
that you guys used to date.
多有意思啊
How funny is that?
真有意思
So funny.
好吧抱歉
Okay, sorry.
所以你撮合你的男友的前女友
So you set up your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend
和你的前男友
with your ex-boyfriend.
那真是...
That's pretty...
-聪明 -我本想说幼稚
- Clever. - I was gonna say childish.
是他先开始的
He started it.
好吧我得问一句
Okay, I have to ask.
这真是为她找对象吗
Is this really about finding her a date?
我说你就承认吧
I mean, come on, admit it.
你介意她和我待在一起
You were bothered by the fact that she was staying with me,
你想要证明这一点
and you're looking to prove a point.
我没有我只是想要为玛德琳和好男人牵线
I'm not. I just wanted to set Madeline up with a great guy.
只是恰好我许多前男友都很好
It just so happens that a lot of my exes are great.
你不是和一个上过
Didn't you date a guy
美国真人秀
《捕捉掠食者》的男人约会过吗
that was on "To catch a predator"?
没有我只是说我觉得有一个掠食者很萌
No. I just said that I thought one of the predators was cute
让我忘了那是电视节目
before I knew what I was watching.
总之玛德琳能和杰约会很幸运
Anyway, Madeline will be very lucky to date Jay.
他很棒
He's a catch.
她也是她很聪明很风趣
So is she. She's smart and funny.
好吧他热爱运动
Okay, he's athletic
一天要读差不多一百本书
and he reads, like, 100 books a day.
她曾试图把肾脏捐献给陌生人
She tried to give her kidney to a stranger,
可惜不匹配
but it wasn't a match.
再说疟疾这事不容忽视
Plus, the malaria thing is nothing to sneeze at.
泽尔达谢谢你帮我和杰牵线
Zelda, thank you so much for setting me up with Jay...
-是嘛 -但是我...
- Yeah. - But I just...
我觉得我还没准备好开始约会
I don't think I'm ready to start dating yet.
再说了他其实不是我喜欢的类型
And plus, he's not really my type.
对反正他也看不上你
Yeah, you're out of his league, anyway.
而且他...他很有魅力很有魅力
And he's a -- he's a catch, though. He's a -- he's a catch.
他是你俩都很有魅力
He is. You're both catches.
如果我这样捡笔你会怎么想
What would you think if I picked up my pen like this?
你对我有意思
That you were coming on to me?
-你难道对我有意思 -没有
- Are you coming on to me? - No.
过来看这个
Come. look at this.
这是第三次了
That's the third time.
我请你来办公室你却把办公室搞得一团糟
I invite you down to my office and you make a mess of the place?
如果笔的数量有任何代表意义
Well if number of pens is any indication,
你一定做得很好
you're doing very well for yourself.
玛德琳来这里
Madeline is here
只有一个理由好吗
for one reason, okay?
那就是想要重新跟你在一起
And that is to get you back.
你能给我点时间吗
Can you give me a minute?
-当然 -谢谢
- Sure. - Thank you.
早上好
Good morning.
这就是为什么她对杰没兴趣
That is why she wasn't interested in Jay.
安德鲁一个姑娘要掉多少次笔
Andrew, how many pens does a girl have to drop
你才能懂她的暗示
before you take the hint?
如果你不介意的话这个妹子我要了
If you don't mind, I'm gonna take a run at this one.
你觉得你有机会吗
Do you think you even stand a chance?
她想要的是个酷炫有才的男人
She wants a cool and creative,
而不是只懂数字的书呆子
not some number pushing nerd.
《洛杉矶周报》称我为
"L.A. weekly" named me
本年度最佳年轻DJ之一
one of their top young D.J.s of the year.
等一下你是DJ迪内希博士
Wait a second. You're D.J. Doctor Dinesh?
不是吧
Oh! What!
出现在一个男人的办公室
Showing up at a guy's workplace
是抢人男友的经典招数
is a classic boyfriend stealer move.
我曾经花了六个小时在摩根斯坦利
I once spent six hours in Morgan Stanley.
抢了俩男朋友开了个人退休账户
Stole two boyfriends and started an I.R.A.
美好的一天
Good day.
听着我爱你是因为你有美好乐观
Listen, I fell in love with your sweet, optimistic,
非常非常正面向上的世界观
very, very positive view of the world.
但我觉得在这件事上你有点天真了
But I think in this case, you are just being a little naive.
我不是天真
I'm not being naive.
她对我没意思我告诉你
She's not into me. I'm telling you.
你接到个不愉快的电♥话♥吗
Are you having a bad call?
我重申天真
I repeat -- naive.
好的好的非常感谢先生
Yes, yes. Thank you so much, sir.
我会转告给客户的
I will relay that to the -- the client.
我很遗憾你跟玛德琳没有成
I'm so sorry things didn't work out with Madeline.
我觉得她仍旧没有从之前的那段感情中
I think she's -- she's having trouble moving past
-走出来 -人之常情
- an old relationship. - Yeah. it happens.
我觉得我知道你来看我的真实目的了
I think I know why you really came to visit.
你知道啦
Oh, you do?
不过我觉得是正常的
I guess that's common, though,
前男女朋友之间仍对对方有感觉
exes still having feelings for each other.
也许你对我还心存留恋
Maybe you have some unresolved feelings for me,
而这就是你决定回来这里的原因
and that's why you decided to come back here.
但...这不可能因为我有女朋友了
But it -- it can't happen because I'm in a relationship.
安德鲁跟你说清楚
Andrew, just to be clear,
我来这里是因为我正在经历一段难过的日子
I came here because I'm going through a tough time
我想要得到好朋友无条件的支持
and wanted the unconditional support of a good friend.
我很遗憾我以为那个朋友就是你
I'm sorry for thinking that was you.
我完全明白你在说什么
I totally hear what you're saying.
有时候你对某人有某种特殊的感情
Sometimes it's like you had something special with somebody,
而这...这感觉并不容易消失
and it's -- it's hard to make those feelings go away.
这正是我要说的
That's exactly what I'm saying.
她没想重新跟我在一起完全没有
Hey, so she didn't want me back. At all.
-她没有吗 -没有
- Oh, she -- she didn't? - Nope!
-你看上去有点难过 -是吗
- You seem upset. - Oh, I do?
想象一下如果我逼着你跟杰说
Well, um, imagine if I forced you to go up to Jay
"我知道你还想跟我在一起"
and say, "I know you still want me."
对如果我对杰这么说
Right. Yes. If I said that to Jay...
他会很生气
he would be mad.
但事实并非如此
Except not in this case
因为他舌吻我了
because he frenched me.
他什么
He what?
他把舌头伸到了我的嘴巴里
He stuck his tongue inside my mouth,
然后我试着用舌头把他推出去
and then I tried to push it out with my tongue,
但这样做是不对的
but that was the wrong move
因为那样就更像是舌吻了
because that just seemed like more frenching.
别再说"舌吻"了
Stop saying "frenching."
你亲了你前男友
You kissed your ex-boyfriend?
但是我马上把他推开了
But I immediately pushed him away.
好吗而且我不知道他还喜欢我
Okay? And I-I didn't know that he felt that way.
对...对不起
I'm -- I'm so sorry.
首先你毁了我跟玛德琳的友谊
So first, you ruin my friendship with Madeline,
然后你自己跟杰亲热
and then you go and make out with Jay?
我会纠正错误的
I'm gonna fix this.
我要挂电♥话♥了好吗
I gotta go. Okay?
史黛菲
Stephie.