恋爱手册（2014）

A to Z S01E10

Part 2 April 9, 2021, 4:41 p.m.

Ooh. Low.
我像一个电灯泡
Bit of a fifth wheel here tonight.
不不是你不是
No, you're not. No, you're not.
-亲爱的你可不是 -不是
- Sweetheart, you're not. - No, you're not.
不能坐这里
Can't be here.
-什么 -为什么
- What? - Why?
消防条例你得换位置
Fire regulation. You gotta move.
从法律上来说她不能坐这里
She legally can't be here.
是的好
Right, yeah.
-电灯泡和火灾隐患 -不是的
- Wow, fifth wheel and a fire hazard. - Oh, no, you're not.
不不如这样大家都站起来
No, you know what? Guys, everybody stand up.
我们都站着
We're gonna -- we're gonna stand.
别傻了别傻了
No, don't be silly. Don't be silly. Don't be silly.
没关系我要回家放松放松
Not at all. I am gonna go home, put my feet up,
睡个美容觉
get some beauty rest.
再见
Bye.
真是好极了撮合你的朋友
Well, this is great. By setting up your friend,
却让我的朋友陷入了深深的沮丧
I have sent my friend into a deep depression.
我确信她会振作起来的
I'm sure she'll snap out of it.
不我觉得你没理解
No, I don't think you understand.
你昨晚听到她说伦敦俚语了吧
Did you hear her using cockney slang last night?
她已经好几年坚持不说了
She's been trying to suppress that for years.
只会在她处在低谷时才会脱口而出
It only comes out when she's at rock bottom.
喂泽
Oy, Z!
你一直用俺滴香皂洗脸是不是
You've been using my bob to clean your boat race, have ya?
什么俺滴香皂洗你滴脸
What? My soap on your boat race, your face!
继续啊
Keep up. Ha ha!
逗你玩呢宝贝
I'm only messing with you, babe.
我只是有点兴奋别紧张
Taking a mickey bliss, ain't I? Relax.
-史黛妃 -怎么
- Stephie -- - What?
我知道你很不开心我懂的
I know that you're upset, okay? And I get it.
斯图没想恋爱却恋爱了而你
Stu wasn't even looking for someone, and you've been, um...
你努力想恋爱却没人爱
You've been -- looking really hard.
但是我向你保证我们会为你找到合适的人
But I-I promise you, we will find you someone.
没关系的
Yeah, look, it's all right.
说实话我没事我懂的
Honestly, I'm all right. I get it.
我是伊万·沃汉
I'm Ivan Vaughan.
对
Right.
-伊万·沃汉是谁 -不知道
- Who's Ivan Vaughan? - I don't know.
昨晚睡不着
Last night, unable to sleep,
史黛妃就看了电视
Stephie watched tv,
偶然发现了一段过去的采访
where she stumbled upon an old interview
有关保罗·麦卡特尼被问及
with Paul McCartney where he was asked
如何和约翰·列侬相识
how he met John Lennon.
我们有一个共同的朋友他叫伊万·沃汉
We had a friend in common. He was called Ivan Vaugh.
史黛妃发现伊万·沃汉
Stephie discovered that Ivan Vaughan
撮合了音乐史上最成功的组合之一
set up one of the most successful matches in music history,
伊万·沃汉
但自己却从没成功
but never found success himself.
那个歌♥手就是约翰
And the singer, who's John,
似乎他很有内容
just looked like he had something, you know?
史黛妃就联想到了自己
Stephie related.
毕竟如果不是史黛妃
After all, if it wasn't for Stephie,
安德鲁和泽尔达可能永远不会认识
Andrew and Zelda may never have met.
是我朋友史黛菲帮我注册的
Uh, my friend Stephie signed me up,
我这次来的目的
and I'm actually just here for this interview
其实是想把她的钱要回来
to try and get her money back.
史黛菲猜想自己是不是如同伊万·沃汉一样
Stephie wondered if she, like Ivan Vaughan,
是个撮合别人无数却撮合不了自己的红娘
was a matchmaker who could never be matched herself.
我要开始为史黛菲物色对象
I'm gonna start looking for someone for Stephie.
也许我会二次牵线成功
Maybe lightning will strike twice.
而我会用公♥司♥经实践证明的算法
And I'll use my company's empirically proven algorithm
来确保每天牵线成功3000次
that makes lightning strike 3,000 times a day.
我对自己的工作没有安全感
I'm insecure about my job.
完成 12个相亲对象
Done. 12 matches.
史黛菲·班尼特
恭喜你推荐12位相亲对象
罗拉非常感谢
Lora, thank you so much.
这很棒不好意思
This is great. Sorry.
约瑟夫·M
等下为什么约瑟夫也在这里
Wait, why is Joseph on there?
对了
Oh, that's right.
我们让他填写了问卷调查
We had him fill out a questionnaire
来看这个网站是怎么运作的
to see how the site works.
安德鲁
Andrew.
我们需要你在今晚的鸡尾酒会上
We need you to show Joseph a good time
让约瑟夫开心
at tonight's cocktail party.
你长了张人畜无害的乖乖脸
And you've got that smooth-faced frat boy look
很合纽约骗子的胃口
that appeals to these New York phonies.
好那我会到场
Yes, I'll be there?
正解可以聊的话题有
Correct answer. Suggested topics of conversation --
高尔夫威士忌饭店性♥爱♥
golf, whiskey, restaurants, intercourse.
这是你的酒券
Here's your drink ticket.
这有多简单啊
How easy was this?
我甚至都不用做介绍
I didn't even have to make introductions.
我只是给他大略指了下方向
I just pointed him in the general vicinity,
她转身他们对视成功
and she turned. They locked eyes, and voila.
-做得漂亮 -谢谢你
- Nicely done. - Thank you.
我本不想吹响成功的号♥角但...
I mean, I don't wanna toot my own horn, but...
如果你可以吹我也可以
Well, if you get to toot, I get to toot, too.
好吧
Okay.
嘟嘟
Toot.
真是成功
Toot indeed.
看看史黛菲找到了其他人
Look at that. Stephie found someone else.
真为她高兴
Good for her.
你为什么要关心她
Why do you care?
关你什么事
Why do you care that I care?
我要举杯庆祝
I would like to propose a toast.
我们撮合了两对快乐小情侣
We matched two happy couples.
我们做到了
We did.
我觉得我们都赢得了一杯免费酒水
I think we both earned our one free well drink,
小费另计
tip not included.
也许不只一杯
Or maybe more than one.
谢谢敬我们
Thank you. To us.
运用冰冷的数据两次出击成功
Our one-two punch of cold hard data...
还有盲目的运气
And blind freakin' luck.
好你知道吗
Okay, you know what?
我跟你玩完了
I am done!
你就跟这里这里
And you say goodbye to this and this
特别是这里说再见吧
and especially this!
你也对这些说再见吧
Well, say an equal goodbye to these,
你知道我在点哪里吧
You know what I'm pointing to.
你也对这里说再见
And you're saying goodbye to this...
我才不在乎
I don't care.
你对这里说再见
And you're saying goodbye to this!
你知道吗
And you know what?
这里你仍旧不能碰这里
This -- this is still off-limits!
-再见 -再见
- See ya! - Bye! Bye!
-再见 -不见
- Bye! - Bye!
你拿不回你的车钥匙了
You're not getting your car keys back!
我不在乎
I don't care!
别盯着我
Don't look at me.
嘟嘟
Toot.
昨晚斯图怎么样
Hey, how did it go with Stu last night?
我从来没见过他对一个女孩这么伤心过
Oh, I have never seen him that upset about a girl before.
他整晚都盯着他们俩在一起的照片
He spent the whole night staring at pictures of them together.
他们只约会过一次
They've only been on one date.
这是我们在饭店的照片
And here's us at dinner.
这是我们在嘉年华的照片
And here's us at the carnival.
饭店嘉年华
Dinner... Carnival.
饭店
Dinner...
没错只有两张照片
Yeah, there are only two pictures.
-难过 -小菲怎么样