恋爱手册（2014）

A to Z S01E03

Part 4 April 9, 2021, 4:39 p.m.

我正要去吃饭
I'm, uh, I'm just stepping into a lunch.
你看起来很漂亮啊
You look so good.
- 你看起来挺帅啊 - 谢谢
- You look amazing. - Thank you.
－太精神了－谢谢
- So amazing. - Thank you.
噢我给你带了点东西
Oh, I got you something.
噢不用这么客气
Oh, you didn't have to do that.
拜托
Come on.
非常感谢
Thank you so much.
古斯塔夫
Gustav!
塞尔达会见一下我的未婚妻
Zelda, meet my fianc.
- 真的非常荣幸见到你 - 见到你真好
- Lovely to meet you. - Very nice to meet you.
先生请你起立
Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to stand up, please.
我只需要在这儿再待一会儿
I'm just gonna be a couple more minutes.
我的天
Oh, my goodness.
干得漂亮啊古斯塔夫
Gustav, well done.
先生你能站到路边来吗
Sir, could you please step on the curb?
警官如果你能小点声音就再好不过了
Sir, if I could get you to just lower your voice, actually.
先生请你起立
Sir, stand up.
好吧两位警官这只是一个误会
Okay, guys, this... this is... this is a misunderstanding.
我的新女朋友也其实算不上真正意义上的女朋友
My new girlfriend... well, she's not my girlfriend per se.
我们刚刚在一起一个礼拜
We've only been together a week.
行了不要狡辩了
Okay, you know what? Come on.
等等
Okay. All right.
我们什么时候去见你的新男朋友？
When do we get to meet your new boyfriend, huh?
这个嗯
Well, um...
哦天呐
Uh...Oh!
她没看到我吧
She doesn't see us, does she?
你这儿有棉花糖
So, you got any marshmallows
可以让我们在你起火的内♥裤♥上烤一烤吗骗子
that we can roast on your pants that are on fire, you liar!
我从来不说谎 - 但是你假装自己有
- I never lied. - But you definitely pretended
很高的逼格但是实际上
to be all high and moralistic when the truth is...
我们俩没什么两样
We're cut from the same cloth.
拜托
Oh, please.
我和你的唯一共同点是
The similarities between you and I end
咱俩的胸一样大
at us having the same size boobs.
关了灯咱俩都一样
It all feels the same in the dark.
我从没寻求过你的帮助
I never asked you to help me.
我还不想帮你呢
I didn't want to give it.
但是安德鲁说如果咱俩不能快点解决问题的话
But Andrew said that if we don't patch things up,
会让他和塞尔达更难堪
we're just making things hard for him and Zelda.
难堪怎么讲
Hard? How?
咱们俩是好朋友并且他们不想让咱们打扰他们
We're their best friends and they want us to all, like,
比如咱们可以去个奶酪派对什么的
hang out or something, or go to, like, fondue parties together.
好吧
Okay.
我是说如果我们真的是好朋友的话
I mean, I guess if we were true friends, then, yeah,
咱俩早该知道如何言归于好了
we'd figure out a way to bury the hatchet.
是啊我也不知道该怎么和好
Yeah. Yeah. I can't see it.
但是我宁愿去割腕让我的血慢慢流出来
But I would rather cut myself and bleed out slowly
在在公厕的地板上
on a...Floor of a dirty public loo.
你的内心怎么了
What's going on inside you?
他们叫我"大鸟"
They call me big bird!
我告诉过你窃听监视
I told you that trolling and spying
和试着找出人们是如何评价你
and trying to find out what people were saying about you
是个馊主意
was a bad idea.
为什么他们这么叫我
Why do they call me this?
是因为我的胳膊吗
Is it my arms?
我的胳膊很像鸟吗
Are they birdlike?
我觉得不是
I don't think so.
可能是因为你经常穿的那条
Maybe it's that yellow canary pants suit
黄色的金丝雀短裤
that you sometimes wear.
为什么一定要是"芝麻街"里的人物听上去弱爆了
Why does it have to be "Sesame Street"? It's weak.
至少不是什么平常的鸟
Well, at least it's not just any bird.
是只"大鸟"
It's big bird.
他在芝麻街很努力的工作
And he pulls some weight on that street.
他也很富有
And he's rich.
真的吗
Is he?
虽然芝麻街中没有说的那么明确但是他住在曼哈顿（纽约商业街区）
Well, it's never said explicitly, but he lives in Manhattan.
推断出来的
You know, connect the dots.
我是说如果你自己好好想想
I mean, if you start to think about it,
大鸟真的非常厉害
I mean, he's a majestic, big bird.
他是一只与众不同的鸟
He's a bird without equal.
我tm的叫大鸟
I'm big bird, motherf...
你自♥由♥了快谢谢你女朋友
You're free to go. Thank your girlfriend.
对不起真的很谢谢你
Sorry. Thank you so much. Yeah.
祝你们今晚好梦警官们
Good rest of your evening, officers.
好了
Okay.
所以...
Okay, so...
我真的很抱歉没有告诉你关于古斯塔夫的事
Uh, I'm sorry for not telling you about Gustav.
我在法♥院♥见到他了他像是在说
I saw him at the courthouse, and he was like
我希望你能来见见我想起新未婚妻
"I want you to come meet my new fiancee."
哦是那个瑞典口音的人么
Oh, that's a Swedish accent?
是的
Yeah.
你刚才跟警♥察♥说了什么？
What did you say to the cops?
我只是希望他帮我个忙
Oh, I just called in a favor.
我们都知道你不太适合呆在监狱
I think we both know that you wouldn't do well in jail.
我我不敢相信在我犯了
I c... can't believe that you would do that
像你所说的那种神经病之后
after I acted like this psycho
你还帮我跟警♥察♥求了情
you suspected that I would be.
别这样
Come on.
安德鲁，我知道你是什么样的人
Andrew, I know who you really are.
真的吗
Do you?
我知道你会给态度恶劣的服务员小费
I know you tip waiters well even if they're terrible.
我知道你每天给你♥爸♥打电♥话♥
I know you call your dad every day.
我也知道你
One thing I know about you...
唉我们又开始了
Oh, here we go.
你是个很棒的朋友
You're a good friend,
你跟古斯塔夫结婚的事证明了这一点
as evidenced by the fact that you married Gustav.
噢对关于这个
Uh, yeah, about that.
我真的很抱歉我没有告诉你
I'm really sorry that I didn't tell you.
我觉得我害怕告诉你
I think I was scared
因为我知道你对待婚姻多么认真
because I know how seriously you take marriage.
好吧也许是有点过于认真了
Well, maybe a little too seriously.
嗯
Um...
我的意思是归根结底不过就是个一纸文件而已对么
I mean, after all, it is just a legal document, right?
我不知道
I don't know.
在大部分时间里我就是这么看待它的
That's how I saw it for most of my life,
不过我觉得我这么想是因为我的恋爱都太倒霉了
but I think that's because I was around bad ones.
我现在不这么想了
I'm less cynical nowadays.
有什么特别的理由么
Any particular reason?
这个我不知道
Uh...I don't know.
我还知道你
Another thing I know about you
很讨厌自己处于尴尬的局面
is that you hate being put on the spot.
所以对不起
So, I'm sorry.
这里有家咖啡厅我们不如
How about we go to... there's a cof...
我给史黛菲发短♥信♥说了我们要来这
Oh, I hope it's okay.
你别介意
I, uh, texted Stephie that we'd be here.
我也给斯图发短♥信♥了
I did the same thing with Stu...
什么
What?
嘿塞尔达
Hey, Zelda!
嘿朋友们我们找到了座位
Hey, guys. We got some seats.
过来坐空位去拿把椅子
Come grab a seat. Pull up a chair.
- 我了个去 - 这是真的么
- Holy crap. - I know, right?
- 装成这样难受死我了 - 我倒是希望难受死你
- This is killing me. - I hope it does.
- 真的 - 真不错
- I really do. - That's nice.
假装变成朋友来帮助他们的朋友
Pretending to be friends to help their friends.
这是斯图和斯黛菲觉得少有的
This was one of the few lies
不别扭的谎言
Stu and Stephie were both comfortable making.