我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst S05E07
Part 1
Oct. 14, 2020, 4:56 p.m.
Why am I hiding?
# 我何须隐藏 #
Why don't I speak?
# 我何必沉默 #
What am I waiting for?
# 我为何等待 #
How you feeling? Good.
心情如何 不错
You sure you're okay he's coming?
你确定他来了你不会生气
I'm not angry anymore.
我已经不气了
I think it might even be good to see him.
见到他也许是件好事
Good.
那就好
We float, we're floating
# 我们漂浮不定 #
Why can't I let
# 我何不 #
Myself out?
# 放空自我 #
What's your end-of-life plan?
你想要哪种死法
Easy, toss me off something.
简单 把我从高处扔下去就行
Huh?
什么
I want to know how it feels to fly.
我想体验飞一般的感觉
Ooh. Or sex murder me.
或者把我奸♥杀♥了
Yeah, scratch that. Sex murder me for sure.
别扔我了 奸♥杀♥就行
I'll be on Nancy Grace 24/7, a nation will mourn.
我会被南希·格蕾丝播报 全国为我哀悼
Don't let Ron Howard's daughter play me in the movie.
别让朗·霍华德的女儿扮演我就行
We have beef.
我跟她有过节
I want to be cremated,
我想被火化
with my ashes kept for eternity in an urn on your mantel.
我的骨灰盒永远放在你的壁炉台上
You may remarry, just no one sexier than me.
你可以再婚 但他不能比我骚
The one exception being Mark Ruffalo.
马克·鲁法洛除外
Fair enough.
行吧
Actually, I'm pretty tired.
我累了
Oh, okay.
好吧
Okay, good night.
晚安
It's just that...
可是...
uh, we've...we've sort of created an expectation where we do sex
我们不是说好了 只要一人想做
whenever one of us wants it. And yet, I'm still tired.
就可以啪吗 但我太累了
Are you mad about the florist? I'm fine.
你是不是还在气花艺师那事 没有
I want to make it up to you. Don't bother.
我想弥补你 别费心了
You can't. How can we make it even?
弥补不了 我们怎么才能扯平
Do you want to sock me in the face? I'm extra bruisey,
你想揍在我脸上吗 我很容易出淤青
so you'll get to relish the effects for weeks.
接下来几周你都能欣赏到战利品
There's nothing you can do about getting your dick sucked.
不管你做什么 吹♥箫♥这事是翻不了篇了
I could suck a dick.
我可以口别人
To even it out.
只要能扯平
Like those "Take a penny, leave a penny" Cups.
正所谓一报还一报
Make it a zero-blowjob sum gain for me.
更何况你稳赚 我不赔
Sounds fair. You do that. Suck a dick, Jimmy.
听着挺公平 就这么干 去吧 吉米
No, I'm serious.
我没开玩笑
Suck a dick. Suck a dick!
吹♥箫♥ 吸屌♥
Alternately, just let me be mad.
不然 就让我气着吧
Next, we have examples of some of our most popular fillings.
接下来 这是我们最火的几种口味
Uh, Butterscotch-Cream Cheese,
咸奶油芝士
Almond Ganache, Lemon Curd, Earl Grey Medley,
杏仁巧克力 柠檬凝乳 什锦伯爵茶
Apricot Jam, Kiwi-Pistachio Buttercream.
杏桃酱 奇异-开心果奶油味
Hey, you wouldn't think kiwi and pistachio
你可能觉得奇异果和开心果
would go well together, and yet, they don't.
配在一起效果不好 没错 的确难吃
So when's the big day? June 9.
你们什么时候举♥行♥婚礼 六月九号♥
Sixnine. Nice. Sex number.
六九 好日子 "性"运数字
They get it. What about you?
他们懂梗 你们呢
We're already married. Shh.
我们已经结了 嘘
We got totally caught up in the hype
我们完全被婚庆宣传坑了
and spent way too much money on our wedding.
婚礼花了太多钱
Our ring bearer was an actual bear.
我们的护戒使者是一头真的熊
Deep-sixed our finances for years.
这几年都要入不敷出了
So we stick it to the wedding industrial complex
所以我们一有空就来婚庆机构
whenever we can. It feels so good.
蹭吃蹭喝 爽翻
Yeah. Rachel has a personality disorder.
瑞秋有人格障碍
I shoplift. I mean, I used to.
我曾经是个小偷
So scamming free cakes or menu tastings
骗吃免费蛋糕和菜品
really scratches the itch.
缓解了我偷东西的欲望
It's our third tasting of the day. Quinn is in AA.
这是我们今天第三场试吃 奎因在匿名戒酒会
Micro-transgressions make drinking
不过是轻微违法
fucking seltzer water tolerable.
就害得我只能喝苏打水
I love shoplifting.
我也喜欢偷东西
I basically stole this whole outfit.
我这一身几乎都是偷来的
And Jimmy's a total alcoholic.
吉米也是个酒鬼
Hey, if you guys want our help gaming the system,
如果你们也想钻体制的漏洞
we could save you a buck or two.
我们可以帮你们省点小钱
We have low to no morals, so we would be totally up for that.
我们没什么道德底线 完全愿意这么干
Great.
太好了
Jimmy, we're gonna have couple friends.
吉米 我们有夫妻朋友了
The hardest of passes.
没意思
Couple friends, Jimmy.
夫妻朋友诶 吉米
All married people need couple friends.
所有已婚人士都需要夫妻朋友
It's a must-have. Couple friends.
必须要有夫妻朋友
Stop saying "Couple friends."
别再说"夫妻朋友"了
We are not going to have...
我们才不会交什么...
Couple friends!
夫妻朋友
Thank you so much for having us over, you guys.
非常感谢你们的邀请
Oh, we love wine hangs on the patio.
在露台喝酒真惬意
We have never done this once.
我们从没这么做过
Why not? You have a gorgeous view.
为什么 这里风景多好啊
We do? Do we? Hmm.
是吗 有吗
Here is our wedding binder.
这是我们的婚礼材料
The orange tabs are the easiest places to scam.
橙色标签是最容易被坑的地方
Purple means you can get actual cash out of them.
紫色标签表示你可以从中捞一笔
DJs, photographers, flowers.
DJ 摄影师 花
We may actually be in the market for a new florist. Right, Jimmy?
我们得重新找个花艺师了 对吗 吉米
Venues.
场地
Very cool. I'm glad we could do this.
好酷 我们能交朋友真好
Hey, how are you guys?
你们俩还好吗
Shh. Oh, they can't hear us.
嘘 她们听不见
We're not really even here anymore. Watch.
我们甚至已经是空气了 看着吧
I don't believe in the Holocaust.
我不相信大屠♥杀♥
So, example... I like that you can smoke there.
比如... 你可以在那抽烟
Huh. Huh. Let me try.
让我试试
Um, Gretchen, you eat your butt,
格雷琴 吃屁♥股♥
and farts from your butt. Oh...
还放了个屁
So, why'd you ask about me and Gretchen?
你为什么突然问起我和格雷琴
Oh, well, planning a wedding can be stressful.
策划婚礼的压力可不小
Also, because of the little thing with the florist.
再加上你和花艺师那点事
Rachel and Gretchen have been texting.
瑞秋和格雷琴相谈甚欢
So I gather privacy goes out the window with couple friends?
所以夫妻朋友间连隐私都不存在吗
Jimmy, you have no secrets anymore.
吉米 你已经没有任何秘密了
Fantastic. But seriously,
真有意思 说真的
if you ever need someone to listen, I'm here.
如果你需要倾诉 随时找我
Okay, Michael Messner, sociologist and proponent
好的 迈克尔·梅斯纳先生
of more emotional elasticity in traditional masculine roles.
主张传统男性应增强情绪弹性的社会学家
I know, I know. I'm a big old softy.
我知道我是个多愁善感的大老粗
AA will do that to you.
这都怪匿名戒酒会
Never stop drinking, Jimmy.
千万别戒酒 吉米
It's horrible.
太可怕了
Man, I would love to come out here
我真想什么时候再过来
and fly my drone over the reservoir sometime.
让无人机在水库上转几圈
Oh, I have a drone, too.
我也有无人机
Well, "Had."
曾经有
They really should put a "Return Home" Button on the controls.
他们真该在遥控器上设置一个"回家"键
They do.
有这个键啊
Ah. What do you know?
你还真懂
So, um, what did Gretchen tell Rachel about the, uh,
所以 格雷琴怎么跟瑞秋说的
you know, t...the time I let someone else fly my drone?
就是... 我让别人上了我的"机"
Was she upset about the flight?
她是不是很失望
Because she's been cagey about it.
因为她不想跟我多谈
Well, how would you feel if someone flew her drone?
如果她被人用"机"上了 你什么感觉
So this place, these are the photographers.
这个场地 这些是摄影师
我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst
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