我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）

You're the Worst S05E06

Part 4 Oct. 14, 2020, 4:55 p.m.

What?!
那个塌屁♥股♥的小碧池是你
That flat-booty bitch was you?
我压根没在约炮周约炮
I didn't fuck during Fuck Week.
啥
What?
所以你俩都清心寡欲的
So neither of you goobers have been banging at all?
不山姆说格雷琴跟人睡过了
Yeah, Gretchen has. Sam told me.
她那是在山姆面前装酷
She lied to Sam to look cool.
我去你俩真是
God. You both
蠢到极点
are such gigantic losers.
那只有我在约炮周和人啪了
And I'm the only one who fucked during Fuck Week,
这还不是我的约炮周
and it wasn't even my Fuck Week.
格雷琴这生米快成熟饭了
Well, Gretchen's about to do it.
可不是吗
Yeah, she is.
真是谢谢你啊
Thanks to you.
你现在处于什么阶段呢
Where are you now?
吃醋
Jealousy.
看得出
Yeah.
# 我听闻 #
I heard
# 你将远行 #
You were going
# 踏上新旅途 #
Down a new way
# 你说 #
You say
# 你眼前迷茫 #
You've been lost
# 时而恍惚 #
For awhile now
# 你却不知为何 #
But you're not sure why
# 千言万语说不尽 #
And this sounded much
# 在你我眼中闪烁 #
It sparkled in our eyes...
谁
Wha...?
你回来啦
Oh, you're home.
吉米谢谢你提出约炮周这么好的点子
Jimmy, thank you so much for suggesting Fuck Week.
不客气
Oh, no problem.
真的谢谢你
No, really.
老实说这还真挺好玩的
To be perfectly honest, it sounded fun,
我一开始毫无性趣还自我怀疑
but I just wasn't feeling it at first, which worried me.
今晚我就随便搞了个人
So tonight I had meaningless sex with a rando.
哦是吗那太好了
Oh. That's great, great to hear.
而且吉米我开始觉得
And, well, Jimmy, it made me realize
我再也不想那样了
I don't want to do that anymore.
和你在一起我就很幸福了
I'm happy being with just you.
我以后不会骗自己了
And I'm not even lying to myself, which,
虽然我骗别人多一些
if I'm not lying to someone else is usually the case.
但说真的
But it's true.
我只想要你
I just want you.
你那边情况如何爽没爽到
Did it work for you? You get it out of your system, too?
我其实早就觉得没必要了
I actually realized that I didn't need it before you did,
所以我没参与
so... I didn't partake.
你参与了呀
Yes, you did.
比如口红印吻痕还有美臀
The lipstick, the hickey, the Insta-butt?
好吧其实为了不毁了你的约炮周
Yeah, well, I didn't want to take Fuck Week away from you,
所以我就装个样子给你看
so I just faked it for your benefit.
不不
No! No!
吉米但我约了
Jimmy! But I did,
我们的婚姻不平等了
which means now we're going into our marriage unequal.
不没事真的没事
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, it's... it's okay, it's okay.
我被人口过我们打平了
I-I got my dick sucked, so, it's even.
我还以为你这周没去钓妹子
Oh, I thought you didn't hook up this week.
对我没有
No, right. No.
我难道没说吗
Didn't-didn't... didn't I say I...
我其实碰到一个小意外
I actually had a small encounter, like,
在可容忍♥的误差界限之内
within the margin of error of said week.
误差界限什么意思
Margin of error? What does that mean?
说起来有点好笑你还记得
Oh, it's f... it's funny. Do you remember
上周我一个人在家挑桌花吗
when I picked out centerpieces alone l-last week?
我当时有事啊
Because I was working.
对你不在的时候...
Yeah. Yeah, well, while y-you were doing that...
那个花艺师
the florist, you know,
她... 帮我口了
she kind of, um... she sucked my dick.
你还记得因为你当时说
You... you remember, because y-you said
我不属于不良少年
that I wasn't... I wasn't a bad boy.
想起来没所以严格来说
Remember? So, yeah, yeah, technically,
这事是在约炮周前开始的
it happened before the commencement.
但这有点小题大做了
But that is splitting hairs,
真的
really, because
因为我们都一致认同
we both came to the same conclusion.
我们不想再这么做了
That we don't want that anymore.
等等
So, wait...
你之前所作的一切
you did all of this...
提议约炮周还处心积虑地
Suggested Fuck Week, went to elaborate lengths
装出一副夜夜笙歌♥的样子
to make it seem like you were fucking...
来刺♥激♥我和别人打炮
So I'd fuck someone, even though I didn't want to,
是为了让你自己好受些
just so you could feel better about yourself?
照你这么说
Well, um, uh, I mean, when you put it that way,
这事还真有点蠢
it does sound a bit foolish.
不我觉得棒极了
No. I'm impressed.
真的
You are?
知道你和我一样是满口胡话惹人嫌弃的骗子
Makes me feel better to know you're as big of a dishonest,
我好受多了
disgusting fucking liar as I am.
晚安吉米
Good night, Jimmy.