魔法师（2016）

The Magicians S04E08

Part 5 Aug. 20, 2020, 1:25 p.m.

"Napster"?
这不是个音乐分享网站的名字吗
Like the music-sharing site?
我认识肖恩·帕克来着
I met Sean Parker at an Arby's.
你知道吗我有时真是低估你了
I seriously underestimate you sometimes, you know that?
是我知道可不是吗
Yeah, no, I know that.
以后不会了
Well, not anymore.
为了费罗里
I hate Fillory for making me say this,
我们不得不"搞垮纳普斯特"了
but we have to shut down The Napster.
你干什么呢
Hey, what are you doing?
波佩希望感觉自己在海滩上
Poppy wanted to feel like she was on a beach,
所以我在帮她
so just... I'm helping her out.
这可真是好正常哦
Definitely acting normal.
大家我找到了
Guys, I think I've got it.
是啊那是某种象征的表现手法方法
Yeah, I mean, that's one way of putting it...
让熔岩喷发什么的
The way the lava's erupting.
你们还没想到吗
Don't... don't you get it?
这就是圣水
It's the elixir.
圣水就是龙的精♥液♥
The elixir is dragon spooge.
她为什么会偷这个
Why? Why would she steal that?
奶奶个锤啊
Holy fuck.
记得我们说昆廷是孩子他爸吗
So, remember how we said Quentin was the father?
我们撒谎了
We lied.
所以你其实是说
So you're saying you...
往我的输卵管里输入了龙的精♥液♥
Turkey-bastered myself with dragon semen.
没什么大不了的
No big.
我有一些...好些问题
I have a few... thousand questions.
把龙当成普通的精♥子♥捐献者就好了
Think of dragons as universal sperm donors.
可以孕育一些非常酷的混血儿
Makes for some really cool hybrids.
我的孩子将成为史诗
My kid's gonna be epic.
听上去有点危险
It sounds kind of dangerous.
你知道它会有多大吗
Do you have any idea how big it's gonna...
不我这是第一例
Oh, nope. This is a first.
史无前例哦
Historic.
我建议你们最后给我退后
I suggest you back the fuck up.
没人能带走我的孩子
No one is taking my baby.
世界上第一个真正的龙妈妈如是说
Said the world's first true mama of dragons.
听着波佩我虽然不认识你
Look, Poppy, I don't know you,
但你的举止有些...
but you're acting kind of...
相信我孕育魔法生物会让你头脑不清
just trust me when I say magical pregnancies can mess with your head.
尤其对于你周围的人
Especially the people around you.
噢太糟了
Oh, crap.
你们稍等一下啊就等我两秒钟
You know what, hold that... Two... thought two seconds.
伙计们边上说
Guys, sidebar?
幼龙胎儿
Dragon fetus.
这就是昆举止这么奇怪的原因
That's why Q's acting crazy.
它一定有什么天生的防护机制
Must have some sort of built-in protection.
是通过触摸传染的
It's touch.
这还是本有怀孕情节的龙类小黄书
So that's dragon pregnancy porn?
又不是什么见不得人的事
Don't kink shame.
不上面说龙宝宝会散发信息素
No, it says here that dragon babies have a pheromone.
任何东西碰到它都会受它控制
Anything touches them, it takes over.
强迫他们照顾胎儿确保它安全
Forces them to nurture so the baby's safe.
昆摸了波佩的肚子
So Q touched Poppy's belly,
所以他现在父爱爆棚
and now they're nesting.
那我们要怎么办
The hell are we gonna do?
防漫游者的咒语
Traveler-proof wards.
真麻烦
Balls.
我还以为这是件轻松活
I'm supposed to be on easy duty.
命令是"抓住他们带回去"
"Tag 'em and bag 'em,"
不是"解决好人♥质♥问题"
not "Manage 'a hostage situation,"
去他的
for shit's sake.
我们确定有人♥质♥吗
We know it's a hostage situation?
别犯傻了
Don't be daft.
当人们告发朋友或是家人
When people turn in friends and family,
往往会涉及私人情感
sometimes they take it a touch personal.
你觉得她意识到是史蒂芬妮叫我们来了吗
You think she realized that Stephanie called us?
真♥主♥在上我也不知道
Muhammed, I have no idea.
而且我也一点不在意
I also don't really give a fuck.
我在意守则规定我们要闯进去
I do. Protocol dictates that we break in there.
在发生任何情况之前逮捕逃犯
Arrest the fugitive before anything happens.
等你破了咒语之后告诉我一声
Let me know when you get through the wards.
我就在这旁边等你
I'll just be over here.
打打飞机什么的
Wanking.
我们可以召唤尖叫书
We can deploy the screamers.
到时候你来写情况说明
You're doing the paperwork.
爱丽丝我不知道
Alice, I don't know
为什么他们会在这里好吗
why they're here, okay?
也许只是一次友好的常规拜访
It's probably just a... A friendly, routine visit.
承认吧斯蒂芬妮
Just admit it, Stephanie.
你把自己所有的问题都怪在我身上
You blame me for all your problems.
不是这样的
That is not true.
你根本没有把我当作女儿
You barely think of me as a daughter.
为了自己的利益一有机会告发我
The second you had a chance to turn me in
你毫不犹疑就行动了
for your own benefit, you took it.
不我没有
No, I didn't!
我是告发了卡罗尔
I... turned in Carol.
你说啥
What?
嗨卡罗尔
Hi, Carol.
我们是来找圣水的它已经没了
We came for the elixir. The elixir's definitely gone.
我们找不回来了现在怎么办
We're not getting it back, so now what?
我不知道
I don't know.
或许我们得找点别的东西
I guess we gotta find something else
来交还给龙
to give the dragon.
这上面说龙蛋要三年的孕育时间
It says here that dragon eggs take three years to gestate.
所以这还是本科普性质的
So this is informative
有怀孕情节的龙类小黄书
dragon pregnancy porn.
波佩上周才偷的灵药
Poppy stole the elixir last week.
她怎么可能现在肚子这么大了
Would she be this pregnant already?
你觉得她在撒谎
You think she's lying.
毕竟是波佩
Well, it's Poppy.
你觉得那个听起来更像真的
I mean, what... what sounds real?
一个爬行动物和红头发人的混血
A reptile-redhead hybrid or a lying thief
还是一个私藏受精龙蛋的骗子小偷
stashing actual fertilized dragon eggs somewhere?
我会让他屈打成招的
I'll beat it out of him.
所以你是...
So you're...
- 正常的人类怀孕 - 真的吗
- Normal human pregnant. - Seriously?
我们怎么能相信你说的任何话
How do we ever believe anything you say?
这叫误导
It's called a misdirect.
为了让你们不要找到法尔科
Yeah, so that you didn't find Falcor.
不许叫它"法尔科"
We're not calling it "Falcor."
能不能让我...
Would you please let me have...
好吧可是你怎么可能用
Okay, well, how is it even possible
圣水让这个蛋受精
you used the elixir to fertilize that?
龙是一种神奇的生物
Duh. Dragons are just fancy fish.
在蛋上喷一点就搞定了
Spray a load on the egg, and voila.
够了你们俩这是被信息素迷惑了
Okay, you two have got the pheromone crazies.
你们摸了蛋所以现在它在让你们
You've touched the egg and now it's making you
干各种蠢事
do stupid things.
你给我放开法尔科
You let go of Falcor!
要是你敢伤害我的宝宝我就杀了你
I will murder you if you hurt my baby!
你听明白了吗
Do you understand?
伙计们
Uh, guys?
为什么我会想舔这个蛋我想舔这个蛋
Why do I want to lick this egg? I want to lick this egg.
噢过几分钟就好了
Oh, that goes away in a few minutes.
- 完蛋 - 烤箱手套搞不定这个蛋的
- Oh, boy. - Egg beats oven mitts, bitch.
现在你和我共用一个老公了
Now you're my sister-wife.
哟茱莉亚想舔舔看这个蛋吗
Yo, Julia, you want to get a lick off this egg?
两对父母
Oh, four parents?
《博爱》里这样倒也可以
I mean, I guess it worked on "Big Love."
茱莉亚别舔那个蛋
Julia, do not lick that egg!
不不要