无耻家庭

Shameless S03E05

Part 5 Jan. 8, 2020, 2:58 p.m.

你记得厕所堵了是怎么通的吗
You know how you plunge a toilet when it's backed up?
记得
Yeah.
想象成一个男人在通另一个男人的厕所
Think of it as one dude plunging another dude's toilet.
可以领养啊
Could always adopt.
我不想要别人的孩子
I don't want someone else's kid.
我希望宝宝能继承
I want a little punk with
你漂亮的眼睛和狡黠的微笑
your pretty eyes and your crooked smile.
我不知道小维
I don't know, V, at some point
也许我们得接受这就是命
we might have to accept that it's not meant to be.
命
Not meant to be?
我17岁的时候被强♥奸♥ 染上性病不能生育
Was I meant to get an STD at 17 from some lame-ass rapper
是命吗
that would trash my tubes?
当我在网上查了他一下午
Was I meant to Google him all afternoon
发现他有8个孩子是命吗
to find out he has eight kids?
我在脸书上加他好友给他留言
Was I meant to friend him on Facebook
控诉他毁掉我的生活也是命吗
to write on his wall some psychotic rant about how he ruined my life?
-宝贝没事的 -不不是
- Baby, it's okay. - No, it's not.
操♥他♥妈♥
Fuck his weak-ass rhymes,
操那些赤脚庸医
fuck that tree frog-lookin' doctor,
操♥我♥过去20年花在
and fuck all the fuckin' money I spent on condoms
套子上的钱
for the last 20 years.
还有你操你这
And fuck you for acting like you don't wanna
-逆来顺受的态度 -等等
- fight harder for this. - Whoa.
你知道我有多想要孩子
You know I do, more than anything.
那我们就继续努力吧
Then let's fight.
别踢了
Enough with the kicking!
-上帝啊 -她在哪
- Christ! - Where is she?
不行我放弃了
I can't-- I give up.
我要睡觉
I need sleep.
我来和你缕一缕
Let me spell this out for you.
城建局如果挖出了遗骸
The city digs up some bones.
警♥察♥就会来
The police show up.
他们查出那是金吉姑妈的
They figure out it's Aunt Ginger.
他们去确定遗骸的年代
They date the bones.
他们发现她已经死了14年
They realize she's been dead for 14 years.
然而她的社保支票
And yet, her social security checks
却月月都有人兑现
are being cashed every month.
这不是醉酒驾驶弗兰克
This isn't a DUI, Frank.
你埋了一具尸体
You buried a body and you stole
并窃取联邦政♥府♥的资产
from the Federal Government.
你会蹲一辈子监狱
You will never get out of prison.
想想吧
Think about it.
该死
Fuck.
你记得那个
Hey. You know the guy
在夜店外被你海扁的家伙吗
you beat the shit out of at that club?
他想让我潜入他的大宅
He wants me to sneak into his mansion,
帮他拿点东西
take all of his crap.
真的
Really?
滑稽
Hilarious.
他自己不能去闹离婚
He can't get it himself. Divorce.
说我可以随便拿
Says I can take whatever I want.
他很有钱你想去吗
He's loaded. You want in?
天呐用空包弹行不行
Jesus! Use blanks, maybe?
该死
Fuck.
能带我表兄弟们去吗
Can I bring my cousins?
-可以 -那好
- Yeah. - All right.
我去
I'm in.
真不明白你怎么会看上
I don't know what you see
那个靠吃伟哥才能上膛的老头子
in that geriatric viagroid.
他给我买♥♥东西给我点客房♥服务
He buys me stuff, orders me room service.
不怕跟我接吻
He isn't afraid to kiss me.
大♥麻♥烟卷快要卖♥♥完了
Yeah, we're low on joints.
冰箱里还有一些大♥麻♥叶
I got extra weed in the fridge,
但还没卷
but it needs rolling.
你们看上去好像需要帮助
You guys look like you could use some help.
-是的太好了 -不不需要谢谢
- Yeah, that'd be great. - No, we're good, thanks.
能帮我们卷点大♥麻♥烟卷吗
Can you roll us some spliffs?
好啊需要一些纸
Sure. We need papers.
在那儿呢
Right there.
你俩真牛
You guys are really killing it.
哇哦大巨人
Whoa, you are a giant.
要是敢问我是不是打篮球的
Ask me if I play basketball
我就打碎你的蛋蛋
and I'll punch your nuts.
买♥♥点啥
What do you want?
两个烟火一包仙女棒
Two fountains, a pack of sparklers,
三卷大♥麻♥ 一根冰棍
three joints, and a bomb pop.
你还需要去做社区服务吗
Hey, you got any community service hours left?
怎么了
Why?
茉莉可以帮忙他主动要求的
Molly could help, he offered.
不用了我都搞定了
No. You know what? I'm covered.
这里也没啥事了你可以回家了
Actually we're good here too. You can go home.
让她在这待着吧
You know what? Have her stick around.
我马上要回酒吧了
I gotta hit the Alibi in ten minutes away.
-我自己能行 -我想待在这
- I can handle it. - I'm good to stay.
不用了你还是回家吧曼迪
No, please just go home, Mandy--
好歹回一次你自己那个破家吧
to your own fucking house, for once.
真伤人啊
That was harsh.
不是吧姐♥妹♥们♥
Really, ladies?
很好笑
Really funny.
我是菲奥娜
Hi, this is Fiona.
是二号♥收银员
I'm working register two.
我被锁在厕所了
I'm locked in the bathroom.
我已经拧过把手了
I did try the knob.
好吧我再试试
Fine. I'll try again.
哪里让你觉得可以在
On what planet is it cool for you
员工卫生间抽烟啊
to take a smoke break in the employee bathroom?
我都不抽这牌子好吧
I don't even smoke Parliaments.
恭喜你发育了
Holy crap, congrats on your puberty.
是啊小咪♥咪♥看起来不错
Yeah, your tits look great.
谢谢
Thanks.
俗话说的好变化总一夜之间
You know, they always say it happens overnight.
去游泳吧
Go for a swim.
去试试你的新身体
Try out your new bod.
好啊
Okay.
这才第四杯
It's my fourth.
第四十四杯我都不管
I don't care if it's your 44th.
我们不能退
We don't do buybacks.
-我穷死了 -小公主新鲜消息
- I'm broke. - Hey, news flash, princess.
来这儿喝酒的百分之一百五都是穷鬼
So is 150% of the patronage here.
你来啦欢迎回来
Oh, there she is. Welcome back.
假期怎么样
How was your vacay?
我去冲浪了被水上摩托撞了
Oh, I went surfing, got hit by a jet ski,
-还看见海豚自♥慰♥ -是吗
- saw a dolphin masturbate. - Yeah?
我手指断了父母要离婚
Well, my finger's broken, my parents are divorced,
-我爹是个男同性恋 -男同性恋
- and my dad's a fairy, so-- - A fairy?
你好老古董
Hello, 1983.
我要的二氧化碳罐拿来了吗
Did you get my CO2 tanks?
嗯你能快点吗
Yeah. Hey, can you make it quick?
我要出去
I gotta get out of here.
-好好 -谢啦
- Yeah, yeah. - Thank you.
说实话别介意
You know, not for nothin', but, uh,
没人喜欢听一个大男人抱怨
no one likes to hear a grown man whine.
就像男人穿UGG一样
It's like the verbal equivalent of a dude wearing UGGs.
感谢你的关心谢谢了
Yeah, well, I appreciate the sympathy, thanks.
赶紧振作吧
Get over it.
菲奥娜没精力操心你这些事
Fiona doesn't have room for it.
她为了家里不断粮已经够忙的了
She's busting her ass just to keep food on the table.
库克县的好市民啊
Good denizens of Cook County,
我有一个提议
I have a proposition.
你♥他♥妈♥又要干嘛弗兰克
What the fuck is it now, Frank?!