小镇滋味

Santa Clarita Diet S03E03

Part 2 Oct. 14, 2019, 11:20 a.m.

I have got a million ideas. Give me some stationary
然后再拿一支笔放到我的嘴里
and put one of your pens in what's left of my mouth.
-是那位塞尔维亚骑士朋友 -接电♥话♥吧
- It's our Knight of Serbia friend. - You should take it.
汤米你打来真是太好了
Hey, Tommy. I'm glad you called
因为我们查到了房♥产经纪活死人的重要线索
because we have a very promising lead on an undead realtor.
她叫罗斯玛丽·辛克莱...
Her name is Rosemary Sinclair and--
克里斯塔·考德威尔吗
Christa Caldwell?
不不是克里斯塔
No, It's not Christa.
但不是她
But it's not.
但不是她
But it's not.
好吧但真的不是她汤米
Okay, but it's not. Tommy?
汤米今天要去杀克里斯塔
Tommy's going to kill Christa today!
-不是她 -他认为是
- But it's not! - He thinks it is.
但不是她
But it's not.
我跟她说了三次
I told him three times.
-但真不是她 -他看到了安妮设计的那篇报道
- But it's not. - He saw the article Anne planted,
现在他很确定
and is now convinced
克里斯塔就是牡蛎农场逃跑的那个金发女活死人
that Christa is the undead blonde from the clam farm.
该死的安妮
Fucking Anne!
我们得阻止汤米
We have to stop Tommy.
我知道
I know.
克里斯塔人品很糟糕但我们不能让她死
Christa's such a horrible person, but we can't let her die.
确实不行该死的
No, we can't. Damn.
要怎么阻止他
How do we stop him?
我不知道他不听我的
I don't know, he won't listen to me.
很抱歉
Wow, I'm sorry.
我是想清一下嗓子提醒你们
I tried to make a throat-clearing sound,
但是那可能就是从脖子里掉下去的部分组织
but I think that's one of the parts that fell out of my neck.
你们不如让汤米看到克里斯塔还活着
Why don't you show Tommy Christa's alive?
让她做一件活死人做不了的事情
Get her to do something an undead person can never do,
比如吃东西然后拍个视频发给他
like eat food, and then send a video of it to him.
-这个办法很聪明 -是啊加里
- That's a smart idea. - Yeah, Gary.
看来你不仅是花瓶而已
Turns out you're not just a pretty face.
这玩笑太早了吗
Too soon?
-你们知道发生了什么吗 -不知道
- You guys know what's going on? - No.
环境社的人都被从课堂里叫出来了
Everyone from Environmental Club got pulled out of class.
也许是我们的祖父母去世了
Maybe all of our grandmothers died.
坐下都坐下
Sit, sit, sit. Sit.
早上好艾瑞克
Good morning, Eric.
昨天
Yesterday...
联调局特别探员苔丝·罗杰斯找到了我
I was approached by FBI Special Agent Tess Rogers.
她正在调查近期发生的液压破碎站点爆♥炸♥案
She is investigating the recent fracking site explosion.
安静
Silence!
联调局正在调查各种相关人员和组织
The FBI is investigating various individuals and groups
包括你们的环境社
as well as this Environmental Club,
你们有着很大的嫌疑
which is rightfully under suspicion
因为你们曾经公开声明反对美国的...
as you have gone on record as being opposed to America's...
能源独♥立♥目标
energy independence.
怎么了莱斯莉
What is it, Leslie?
我们很支持能源独♥立♥ 我们只是反对毒害...
We're for energy independence. We're just opposed to poisoning--
够了联调局特工单独询问你们的时候
Enough! You'll all have a chance to talk
有的是你们开口说话的机会
when the FBI interviews each and every one of you.
什么
What?
我就知道这个消息会让你们窃窃私语的
I thought that would get a murmur out of you.
我告诉你们吧我奉劝你们
Well, let me tell you this. I encourage each of you
把你们所看到的环保主义者的可疑行为
to share whatever observations you have made,
一五一十地全部说出来
of suspicious behavior amongst your fellow environmentalists.
不要漏掉任何细节
No detail is too small to leave out.
不要顾念任何情分
No bond is too strong to be violated.
我知道你们在想什么
And I know what you're thinking.
"诺瓦克校长我可不是打小报告的人"
"Hey, Principal Novak. I ain't no snitch."
那我告诉你们
But let me tell you this.
说出真♥相♥
There ain't no shame...
没什么好羞耻的
in telling the truth.
别担心我们不会有事没人知道任何事
Don't worry, we'll be okay. Nobody knows anything.
其实温特应该知道些什么
Yeah, actually... Winter might know a little something.
温特看到你扔书包了吗
Winter saw you getting rid of the backpack?
-你为什么没告诉我 -对不起
- Why didn't you tell me? - I'm sorry.
我当时没觉得有什么我不希望吓到你
It didn't seem like a big deal. I didn't want you to freak out.
要是她告诉联调局怎么办
What if she tells the FBI?
那就糟糕了
Well, that would be terrible.
不你应该说
No. You're supposed to say...
"别担心艾瑞克温特不会跟联调局说
"Don't worry, Eric. Winter won't tell the FBI.
她目睹了我把装过炸♥药♥的书包扔掉"
She saw me throw out the backpack we used to transport explosives."
别担心艾瑞克温特不会...
Don't worry, Eric. Winter won't...
后面我忘记了
I forgot the rest.
-老天爷啊 -我们只需要给她一个理由
- Oh, Jesus. - We just need to give her a reason
认为扔书包这件事没什么可疑的
not to be suspicious about the backpack,
这样她就不会跟联调局说了仅此而已
so she doesn't mention it to the FBI. That's all.
不敢相信会这样
I can't believe this is happening.
我们当初为什么要炸掉液压破碎站点太愚蠢了
Why did we even blow up that fracking site? It was so stupid.
我们真够蠢的
We were so stupid.
并不蠢我们成功了
It wasn't stupid. It worked.
我们犯法了艾比美国是讲♥法♥律的国家
We broke the law, Abby. And we're a nation of laws.
法律和秩序法庭要有秩序
Law and order. Order in the court.
你这是怎么了
What's happening to you?
我他妈精神崩溃了
I'm fucking spiraling.
你这份土豆加得太夸张了吧
Well... That's quite a potato you put together for yourself.
我很喜欢汤沙拉和其他
I love Soup and Salad and Such.
你知道我今天打算怎么做吗
You know what I'm gonna do today?
我要先从"其他"开始吃
I'm gonna start with such
-然后一路往上走 -好吧
- and work my way back. - Well,
那你留点肚子因为克里斯和克里斯塔的助理说
save some room, 'cause Chris and Christa's assistant
他们随时可能会过来
said they're supposed to be here any minute.
我刚才在想加里的事
I was thinking about Gary.
你有没有注意到
Did you see how excited he got
他帮我们的新公♥司♥想点子的时候有多激动
when he was coming up with ideas for our company?
是啊我刚才也在想他
Yeah, I was thinking about him too.
我知道这样很疯狂但我们可以把他聘为第一个员工
I know it's crazy, but what if we make him our first employee?
给他买♥♥个耳机和Alexa[亚马逊人工智能助手]
Hook him up with a headset and Alexa.
连健康保险都不用帮他买♥♥
We wouldn't have to give him health insurance.
椅子也不需要
Or even a chair.
挺好的不过其实...
That'd be nice, but actually...
我在想别的事
I was thinking about something else.
他说他不想独自生活一辈子
When he said that he didn't want to live alone forever,
让我意识到
I realized...
我也不想
neither do I.
亲爱的你还有很长时间才会面对这个问题
Sweetheart, that's not going to happen for a long time.
但总归是会发生的除非...
But it is going to happen. Unless...
除非
Unless?
你让我咬你
You let me bite you.
那样我们就可以一辈子在一起了
And we can spend eternity together.
我没想到能在"汤沙拉和其他餐厅"里
I did not expect to be offered immortality
能拿到永生的机会
at the Soup and Salad and Such.
当然我们可以等到艾比上大学之后
We'd wait until Abby went off to college, of course.
你还真是深思熟虑了一番
Whoa, you've really been thinking about this.
是的所以
I have.So...
你怎么看哈蒙德先生
What do you say, Mr. Hammond?
你是否愿意与这个女人结为夫妻共同生活...
Will you take this woman to be your wife for the next...
一千年什么的
1,000 years or so?
永生...
Living forever...
需要考虑很多
is a lot to think about.
慢慢来这不是简单的决定
Take your time. It's a big decision.
但是亲爱的我全心全意地...
But, my darling, with all my heart...
我真的希望你能答应
I do hope you'll say yes.
克里斯和克里斯塔来了
Chris and Christa are here.
太好了我们去拯救她的生命吧
Great. Let's go save her life
这样她就能在晒黑床上自然意外身亡了
so that she can die naturally one day in a tanning bed accident.
我的天呐
Oh, my God!
这不是克里斯和克里斯塔嘛
It's Chris and Christa.
乔快看是克里斯和克里斯塔