废柴联盟（2009）

Community S05E02

Part 3 Oct. 19, 2020, 1:15 p.m.

I think our opinions about pop culture are fed to us
我觉得我们对流行文化的观点是灌输我们
by machines designed to criminalize human autonomy.
机器设计的东西将人类自主♥权♥定罪
Good one.
说得好
Dear god.
上帝啊
Abed. No, stand back.
阿布蒂别退后
Give him space.
给他一点空间
Nicolas Cage, good or bad.
尼古拉斯·凯奇好还是坏
A challenge, certainly, but not unsolvable,
当然是个挑战但并非无解
Because all actors have distinct values,
因为所有演员都有不同的价值
which I use to find answers.
而我则利用这一点寻找答案
Abed, how much Nicolas Cage did you...
阿布蒂你对尼古拉斯·凯奇做了多少...
Enough!
够了
I watched enough to find... the answers.
我看了很多足够找到答案了
Because this... this is my reality,
因为这是我的现实
this is how I learned to be, and my being
这是我的认识而我的人生
doesn't allow for Nicolas...
绝不允许尼古拉斯...
Freaking Cage, okay?
草泥马的凯奇
Oh, yeah!
嗷耶
Yeah! Oh! Oh!
耶嗷嗷
Oh, I'm a cat. I'm a sexy cat.
我是一只猫我是一只性感猫咪
Abed?
阿布蒂
Think of something safe like
想点安心的东西比如
Holly Hunter, or Don Cheadle!
荷莉·亨特或唐·钱德勒
Abed? Abed!
阿布蒂阿布蒂
That was brilliant.
太赞了
You gave Annie A-minus?
你给安妮打了个A减
How could you? What were you thinking?
你怎么这样你想什么呢
Are you drawing a peanut? It's a duck,
你在画花生吗这是鸭子
and it's none of your concern, actually.
而且这不管你的事
Are you trying to cartoon?
你是要画漫画吗
Trying and succeeding. State your business.
正努力取得成功说你的事儿吧
I want to know what kind of monster
我想知道是什么样的怪物
minuses the best student in his class.
会给自己班上最好的学生减分
I'm a monster?
我是怪物
I was in the storm drain lair of the Black River Ripper.
我是栖息在雨水沟巢穴的黑水河开膛手
I have seen human heads used for things other than heads,
我目睹了人类的头脑用在头脑以外的事物上
so you best not be calling me a monster.
所以最好别叫我怪物
Okay, you're a bad teacher.
好吧你是个糟糕的老师
I got her off your back.
她不再纠缠你多亏了我
I was handling it.
我明明应对得很好
Unlike you, I know how to engage my students.
不像你我知道怎么鼓励我的学生
I mean, I may not love teaching,
我是说我或许不喜欢教书
but I did fool around with it today,
但我今天确实糊弄得不错
and I may hook up with it again a few more times
也许我还会再糊弄几次
even if I do dump it right before Christmas.
即使我可能会在圣诞节前撂挑子
We do not work for them. Maybe we do.
我们不是为他们而工作的也许是
That does not count as an argument.
那不算是辩护
Yeah, well, drawing ducks doesn't count as cartooning!
是啊画鸭子还不算画漫画呢
It's one duck, his name is Jim,
就一只鸭子他叫吉姆
and publishers are interested!
出版商们很感兴趣
Miss Edison, good news.
埃迪生小姐好消息
I talked to Professor Hickey and
我跟汉基教授谈过
it turns out your project was an "A."
原来你的作业得了A
You used your connections to change my grade?
你走后门帮我改成绩
No, an A-minus means you actually earned an "A,"
不得了A减其实代表你得了A
but your teacher doesn't like you.
但是老师不喜欢你
It's a secret faculty thing. What?
这是教师队伍的小秘密什么
Are you kidding? Et tu, Brute?
你在开玩笑吗怎么连你都这样
Am I using that right?
我用对了吗
I've been busting my butt for five years,
我辛辛苦苦学习了五年
and the whole thing comes down
成绩却要看几个老废柴的脸色
to a few old losers' petty insecurities?
和他们可怜的不安全感
Oligarchy! Et tu, Brute!
完全是寡头政♥治♥ 怎么连你都这样
We've got to tell people!
我们得去告诉大家
Minuses are made up!
A减B减什么的都是编出来的
It's riot time! Yeah!
造♥反♥搞起来
Bring me their heads!
把他们的头颅拿来
Pop pop!
噼里啪啦砰砰
Abed? I couldn't find you at school, so I got worried.
阿布蒂在学校找不到你我有点担心
You're throwing away all your little movies, why?
你把你的电影都扔掉了你干什么啊
They have no value anymore.
它们没有价值了
Well, if you're looking for something to believe in,
如果你在寻找信仰
I know a skinny, little Hebrew handyman you could meet.
我可以为你引见一位瘦瘦的希伯来杂工
I'm not going to become Christian, Shirley,
我不会成为基♥督♥徒的雪莉
Or a better Muslim.
或是一个更好的穆♥斯♥林♥教♥徒♥
This was my religion.
这是我的宗教信仰
I thought the meaning of people was somewhere in here.
我以为人类的意义在这其中
Then I looked inside Nicolas Cage
然后我看透了尼古拉斯·凯奇
and I found a secret.
发现了一个秘密
People are random and pointless.
人类随机而无意义
well, in my religion,
在我的宗教信仰中
the whole point is that you can't understand every little thing,
最重要的事是你不会了解每一件小事
and you know, there's a word for people
有个词就是给人类的
who remind you that you're not God,
提醒他们你们不是上帝
and invite you to try a little harder.
诚邀你们再努力一点
Prophets, Messiahs, Fung Fu pandas.
先知救世主功夫熊猫
So Nicolas Cage is Jesus? uh, no,
尼古拉斯·凯奇是耶稣吗不
but he clearly works in mysterious ways,
但他行事的确诡异
and maybe that's just his job.
也许那就是他的工作所在
And that's why critics can call him a genius or an idiot
所以影评人可以叫他天才或是白♥痴♥
and be right no matter what.
不管怎样都是对的
A demon to some and an angel to others,
有人觉得是魔鬼有人觉得是天使
like a cenobite.
就像修道士
Excuse me, did you say cenobite?
什么你是说修道士吗
Yeah, you know, cenobite, like from Hellraiser.
是啊修道士「猛鬼追魂」里那个
You like hellraiser? You know the word "Hellraiser"?
你喜欢「猛鬼追魂」你知道猛鬼追魂这词
I thought Pinhead in space was a bit of a letdown,
我觉得太空针头鬼有点扯淡
but I'm in for the ride.
但是我挺喜欢的
Rise up, Greendale!
起来吧格林德尔
Your teachers have been lying to you!
你们的老师一直都在欺骗你们
You deserve slightly higher grades!
你们本应该拿到稍高学分的
Slightly higher grades! Slightly higher grades!
稍高学分稍高学分
The whole world is watching this!
全世界都在看着我们
Yeah! oh, Wait.
噢耶等等
I'm out of data minutes.
我没有流量了
The whole world will be watching this on the first of next month!
在下个月第一天全世界都会看着我们
Slightly higher grades! Slightly higher grades!
稍高学分稍高学分
Jeffrey, do something! Slightly higher grades.
杰夫瑞做点什么稍高学分
Distract them. Take your shirt off!
转移注意力大♥法♥ 上衣脱掉
Here. Slightly higher grades!
来我帮你稍高学分
Slightly higher grades! Everybody,
稍高学分所有人
Calm down! Just listen!
冷静下来听我说
Do you think the students and teachers at Harvard
你们认为哈佛的学生和老师
are at each other's throats?
会这样拼命大吵大闹吗
No, because they're all rich.
不会因为他们都很有钱
We all have something in common too.
我们也有共同点
We all suck. We're all broke.
我们都很逊都是穷光蛋
We all just went through an entire week
我们一整周吃恶心的肉丸餐
of meatball lunches without even blinking.
连眼都不眨一下的
Oh, that's on me.
我的错
I converted the lunch menu to a spreadsheet.
我弄表格时一不小心把午餐单搞成重复的了
The teachers here are teachers here
学校的老师之所以来到这里
because they did something wrong, same as the students.
是因为他们做了错事跟学生一样
So get on the same team, because, take it from me,
所以我们还在站成一队吧听我的没错
those of us that get to leave aren't going anywhere.
因为离开的那些人也好不到哪去
Boo! No, you suck!
下去吧你烂透了
Jeffrey, go with my "Take off your shirt" plan!
杰弗瑞还是用我想出的脱衣绝技吧
May I point out that you're doing this together?
我能指出你们在一起嘘我吗
It's all based on rows and columns of cells.
它基于横排竖排什么的
I think that's why the call it "Excel."
所以才叫做「Excel」