废柴联盟（2009）

Community S05E01

Part 4 Oct. 19, 2020, 1:15 p.m.

You found my Clive Own Tumblr.
我汤不热的小号♥被你发现了
And what happened to Annie the unstoppable go-getter?
不懈努力的优等生安妮又变成了什么样子呢
Well, there was that gas leak last year.
去年发生了一起煤气泄漏嘛
Oh, don't blame it all on the gas leak year.
别都怪在煤气泄漏上
This was a four-year process.
在这四年里
We went in one end as real people
我们的生活从现实的人生
And out the other end as mixed-up cartoons.
退化成乱七八糟的二次元世界了
Cool. Sure.
酷啊酷你妹
This coming from the guy who's had
说这话的某人曾在学校里
how many psychotic breaks on campus?
精神崩溃过几次来着
Are we including the gas leak year?
要算上去年的煤气泄漏那次吗
You all came here with a chance to be something,
你们报考这所学校时都曾踌躇满志
and you all had that taken away from you.
现在这些志向都去哪儿了
Get something back.
你们需要补偿
Seek damages.
要求学校赔偿损失吧
Sign here.
在这儿签字
But you're our hero.
但你是我们的英雄啊
I mean, in the commercial. The commercial was a lie.
在广♥告♥里... 广♥告♥是骗人的
You staged a robot fight? Yeah.
机器人♥大♥战是假的吗没错
In real life, the robot wins.
在现实中机器人赢了
Troy?
特洛伊
If Jeff didn't change, then Jeff is right.
既然杰夫没变化那他就是对的
Case closed. Let's make some money.
已经结案了咱们分点钱吧
Okay, Jeff, if this is what you really want to do.
好吧既然这是杰夫做出的决定
I'll sign.
我签字就是了
The choice to make is yours.
做出决定的人是你自己
No, it's yours.
不是你
We're putting Greendale in your hands.
这所学校的未来就交给你了
Do we all have to say something?
我们都必须发表两句感言吗
No, you can just sign it. Okay.
你签字就是了好吧
You brought us together.
是你把我们凝聚在一起的
With lies.
通过谎言
But what you do is above lying, remember?
你所做的不仅仅是骗人那么简单
You show us the right truth.
你教会我们真正的道理
You won't regret this.
你们不会后悔的
I'd like to take the study room table in back and burn it.
我想把这张桌子拿到后面烧了
Burn it? Why?
为什么要烧了它
The same reason I never returned Time Bandits to Blockbuster.
就好比我永远不会把「时光大盗」还给租赁店
Nobody else deserves it.
没有人能配得上它
Jesus!
天哪
Looks as if you've lost your way.
你好像迷路了
Pierce?
皮尔斯
Continue on this path, and you might miss your last chance
继续这么走你会错过在中♥央♥花♥园♥
to see the Pierce Hawthorne Museum of Gender Sensitivity
由皮尔斯·霍桑博物馆举办的
And Sexual Potency on the central quad.
「性别意识与性♥交♥能力」展览最终场
The museum and this hologram were donated in compliance
依照法♥院♥指令此次展览与我的全息影像
with a court order I'm not allowed to discuss.
均为无偿赞助详情我不便多说
Let's just say some women can't take a compliment.
只能说有些女人真是夸不起啊
Unbelievable.
难以置信
What I am allowed to discuss is Greendale,
法♥院♥允许我发表以下言论
and I'll say this:
关于格林德尔
Don't turn your back on it.
请你不要背叛它
Take it from a man with no legal right to be there.
就听我一句劝吧虽说法♥院♥不许我去学校
You're in a special place.
这个学校是个特别的地方
A crappy place, sure,
或者说很烂的地方
But only because it gives crappy people a chance
但它给了废柴们一线机会
to sort themselves out.
理清头绪的地方
Did I sound gay at the end?
刚才的话是不是太基情了
Do you want to do another take?
我能重新录一段吗
Jeffrey, I'm not decent. I know.
杰夫瑞我还没穿衣服呢我知道
These are the signatures of the five people
这五份签名来自五个
that are crazy enough to care about this toilet.
依旧关心这所烂学校的疯狂学生
And tonight, I almost got them to sue it.
我今晚差一点就说服他们起诉学校了
Heed the warning!
以此为戒吧
It's not easy being dean, Jeffrey!
这院长可不好当杰夫瑞
Then stop being the dean!
那你就别当了
It's my whole ideantity!
那我会失去存在感的啊
I mean, wah, see what I did there? That's proof!
院长的工作就是我存在的证明啊
Get your crap together.
省省吧你
Your job is not to hand out degrees.
你的职责不是教书育人
Your job is to make this a toilet
而是把这所学校弄得一团糟
that people don't have to be crazy to care about.
这样学生们也不会发了疯地来保护它
But you could stay here and help me save the school.
你可以留下来帮我一起拯救学校
For how much money?
你付我多少钱
I-I can't offer you any money.
钱我是付不起
I could offer you a job.
但我能给你份工作
You just described slavery.
你当我是奴隶么
I mean, there's nothing in the budget for school saver,
我是说预算里没有「拯救学校」这一款项
But I could hire you as...
但我能聘用你做...
Screw you, Abed.
我顶你个肺阿布蒂
I'd be depressed right now if these samples from work
要不是因为这样做有助于我开启人生新篇章
weren't giving me a new outlook on life.
我肯定早犯抑郁症了
If you're interested in learning more,
如果你们感兴趣
Ask your doctor if Joyvatrex is right for you.
跟你的医生咨♥询♥可不可以服用欢乐剂
Oh, honey.
亲爱的
If we sue Greendale, can I be a surprise witness?
如果要起诉学校我能做关键证人吗
Wait. Don't tell me.
等等别告诉我
Stop!
等一下
We shouldn't sue the school.
我们不该起诉学校
Ohh. Come on!
拜托你又来
Are you trying to give us emotional whiplash?
你是想从精神上打击我们是么
Look, if you feel there's more work to be done on yourselves,
如果你们觉得还有「壮志未酬」
then as crappy as this place is,
这个糟糕的学校
It's a place that you can do it.
能帮你们完成梦想
You got a job teaching here, didn't you?
你得到了在这儿教书的机会是么
I don't want to talk about it.
求别问
Well, then, I'm getting back into forensic science.
那我想继续研究法医学
That was my actual dream. It's my fault I bailed on it.
这是我真正的梦想我不该放弃的
A film degree doesn't make me a filmmaker.
一纸文凭并不说明我是合格的导演
I need to learn how to work with other people.
我还要学如何与人打交道
I need to figure out who I am. I'll help you.
我想了解真正的自我我会帮你
Get out of my brain.
从我的脑袋里出去
I need to learn how to really run a business
我要学会如何经商
by my own standards, not Greendale's.
要符合我自己的标准而非格林德尔的
I'm gonna get a four-year Psych degree,
我想取得四年制的心理学学位
then a master's, and become a real psychologist.
接着读研然后成为真正的心理学家
Or you could find another major.
其实换个专业也不错嘛
A real psychologist.
成为真正的心理学家
How about English? Psychology.
读英语吧心理学
All right, what's important is,
好吧关键是
No matter what,
不论如何
we'll be trying to talk Britta into doing something different
我们会想办法说服布雷塔另谋出路
together.
齐心协力
Burn, hopelessness.
燃烧吧绝望
It's a fire...
着火啦
Little victories count for a lot around here...
在这里小小的成功也是至关重要的...
Even if you never asked to win in the first place.
即使你一开始就没有求胜之心
And you have to enjoy those nice moments while you can.
人生得意须尽欢
See, he does a voice-over wrap-up at the end of every episode.
看每集结束时他都会以画外音做总结
Wow. Cool.
是嘛酷啊
Because around here, they never last very long.
因为在这儿欢乐不会持续太久
Once more. More teachery.
再来一次要更有老师范儿
I want to kill myself.
我想撞豆腐自尽
Use that.
就是这种感觉
Are you a good person?
你是好人吗
Yes, unlike you.
没错我与你不同
I can guarantee...
我能保证...
the Winger beaten you...
我一定会打败你...
Not any more.
再也不会了