瑞克和莫蒂（2013）

Rick and Morty S03E03

Part 1 Oct. 6, 2020, 11:51 a.m.

Morty?!
Morty
Morty! Rick?
Morty Rick
Hey, Morty?! -Rick?
嘿 Morty Rick
Are you far away, or are you inside something?
你在远处还是在什么东西里
Is this a camera?
这是相机吗
Is everything a camera?
还是说所有东西都是相机
RICK: Morty, the garage, Morty.
Morty 我在车♥库♥里听见没
Come to the garage!
快到车♥库♥里来
Morty?
Morty
Rick? W-Where are you?
Rick 你你在哪里
On my work bench, Morty.
在我的工作台上
Are you invisible and you’re gonna, like, fart on me?
你是打算隐身之后朝我放屁吗
Flip the pickle over.
把这根腌黄瓜翻过来
What, I’m gonna touch it,
搞什么我要是碰了它
and you’re gonna tell me it’s an alien dick or something.
你是不是要告诉我这是根外星鸡♥巴♥之类的
Come on, flip the pickle, Morty.
别废话赶紧把这根腌黄瓜翻过来
You’re not gonna regret it. The payoff is huge.
你不会后悔的包你惊喜
I turned myself into a pickle, Morty!
我把自己变成了一根腌黄瓜
Boom! Big reveal -- I’m a pickle.
大揭秘我是腌黄瓜
What do you think about that?
你觉得怎么样
I turned myself into a pickle!
我成功变身成一根腌黄瓜
W-What are you just staring at me for, bro?
你就这么盯着我♥干♥嘛
I turned myself into a pickle, Morty!
我把自己变成了一根腌黄瓜
And? And?
还有呢还要什么
What more do you want tacked on to this?
你还想我在后面加上句什么
I turned myself into a pickle, and 9/11 was an inside job.
我把自己变成了腌黄瓜还有911事件是自己人干的
Was it? Who cares, Morty?
真的吗抓住重点
Global acts of terrorism happen every day.
国际恐♥怖♥主♥义♥天天有
Uh, here’s something that’s never happened before --
这件事是前所未有
I’m a pickle.
我变成了腌黄瓜
I’m Pickle Rick!
腌黄瓜Rick
Are you going to, I mean, you know --
你是打算这要怎么说
Is this the first part of some kind of magic trick?
这是什么魔术的第一个环节吗
I don’t do magic, Morty, I do science.
我不变魔术我只搞科学
One takes brains, the other takes dark eyeliner.
一个靠脑子另一个靠黑色眼线
Well, can you move? Can you fly?
那你会动吗还是说你会飞
Wouldn’t be much of a pickle if I could.
要是可以的话我就不能算是一根正宗的腌黄瓜了
All right, well, do pickles live forever or --
好吧那腌黄瓜可以长生不老还是
Morty, sTop digging for hidden layers and just be impressed.
别刨根问底了安静地崇拜我就行
I’m a pickle. II’m just trying
我现在可是一根腌黄瓜了我我就想
to figure out why you would do this --
搞明白你为什么要这么做
why anyone would do this.
怎么会有人做出这种事来
The reason anyone would do this is, if they could,
任何人会这么做的原因假设他们能做到
which they can’t, would be because they could,
事实上他们不能都是因为他们能做到
which they can’t. [ Door opens]
但他们不能
Morty, we have to get going, or we’re gonna be late.
我们得赶紧出发了不然就晚了
Where’s your grandpa? RICK: Right here, sweetie.
你外公人在哪儿在这儿呢
I’m a pickle! What?!
我现在是根腌黄瓜了你搞什么
Why would you -- Ugh!
你干嘛算了
Look, we’re running late. We have to go.
听着我们要迟到了赶紧出发
W-Where are you guys going?
你们要去哪里
We have an appointment downtown
我们预约了咨♥询♥ 要进城
that was set a week ago and agreed upon by everyone,
—周前就定了全员通过
including you.
也包括你
Oh, my God. Beth, oh, it totally slipped my mind.
哦天呐 Beth 我全忘光了
Geez, oh, man. I’m a pickle.
哎呀我成了腌黄瓜
I mean, I don’t know jf I can -- Ooh, geez.
我不知道我能不能哎呀
Rick, did you do this on purpose to get out of family counseling?
Rick 你是不是故意这样做想逃掉家庭心理咨♥询♥
Morty! It's okay, Beth.
Morty 没事的 Beth
I understand Morty’s suspicion.
我能理解Morty的猜疑
I’ve misled him before.
毕竟我以前骗过他
Morty, turn me so we’re making eye contact.
Morty 帮我翻个身好让我看着你的眼睛
Morty, I assure you,
Morty 我向你保证
I would never find a wayto get out of family therapy.
我永远不会"找法子"来"逃避"家庭咨♥询♥
I hope my lack of fingers doesn’t prevent the perception of my air quotes.
希望即便我没有手指你也能领会到我打引号♥的动作
Can’t you just turn yourself back into a human?
你就不能把自己变回人吗
Great question, Summer.
问得好 Summer
The unfortunate answer is
但不幸的是
I did this to challenge myself.
我这是为了挑战自我
And it could take hours or even days
可能会花上几小时甚至几天
before I’m able to figure out how to return to human form.
我才能搞清要如何变回人类形态
But, I mean, you know, your mom could put me
但是我是说
your mom could put me in a purse or a pocket, you know,
你妈妈可以把我放在钱包或口袋里
if she really needs me to go.
如果她真的需要我过去的话
Nobody needs anything. Okay, it’s fine.
什么都不需要没事的
I mean, you should just stay here and figure out
你就待在这儿
how to sTop being a pickle, okay?
然后搞清楚怎样变回来行吧
Hey, Rick, why is there a syringe of mysterious fluid
Rick 为什么有支装着神秘液体的注射器
hanging directly over you?
悬在你的正上方
Also, why is the string attached to it running through
还有为什么栓着它的绳子
a pair of scissors attached to a timer?
要穿过一把连接有计时器的剪刀
And why is the timer set to 10 minutes from now,
以及为什么时间定在十分钟以后
exactly when we would have left for therapy?
正好是我们出发去做心理咨♥询♥的时间
Well, Morty, if you must know,
Morty 如果你非要知道
the syringe is completely unrelated to this discussion
这支注射器完全和此次讨论无关
and, therefore, does not warrant further explanation.
因此根本不值得更进一步的解释
Enough. Kids, it’s time to go. We don’t want to be late.
够了孩子们该走了别迟到
W-W-What are you doing there, Beth?
你你你在干什么 Beth
W-What are you doing there, sweetie?
你在干什么宝贝儿
Well, I mean, you don’t want to get pierced by a needle
你也不想被一根里面充满了与你的处境
full of liquid unrelated to your situation.
无关的液体的针扎到对吧
How’s that gonna help?
毕竟没有什么用
Can’t argue with that.
无法反驳
Great. We’ll see you later.
很好我们回头见
Hey, hey, be careful with that.
嘿嘿小心点
It’s for something else. [ Car doors open, close]
它有其他用处
[ Engine starts] It’s really important,
真的挺重要的
so don’t break it.
别打碎了
Okay, I may have fucked up here.
好吧我他妈可能搞砸了
Dup, ap, ap, pap, Ut, dah, pap, pap, pap, pah.
Dup ap ap pap ut dah pap pap pap pah
T-T-Tah, tah.
T-t-tah tah
[ Cat meows] Oh, great.
哦真棒
Stupid cat.
蠢猫
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
喔喔喔喔
I know what it looks like to you, Izzy, but I’m not a snake!
我知道这看起来像什么 Izzy 但我不是蛇
I’ve seen the YouTube videos. I know cats are scared
我看过油管视频知道猫咪害怕青黄瓜和腌黄瓜
of cucumbers and pickles because they think they’re snakes.
因为看上去像蛇
[ Hisses] I’m not a snake!
我不是蛇
I’m a pickle, I’m a pickle!
我是根腌黄瓜我是根腌黄瓜
Whoa! [ Grunts ]
哇啊
Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
哇啊啊啊啊啊
Oh, crap, that sun is bright.
我靠完了太阳太大了
Okay, come on.
好吧振作点
This can’t really be the way I go out.
我不可能就这么完蛋了
This is the mega-genius equivalent
这就是超级天才版本的
of dying on the toilet.
死在马桶上
So hot.
太热了
This is how I’m gonna die.
我就要这么死了
Oh, God, moisture.
老天啊水分
Oh, God, the moisture. Dial it back, God.
我的天啊水分悠着点儿老天爷
Dial it back a little bit here!
太过了回去点儿
Oh! Oh.
呃哦
Oh, God!
我的天啊
Perpendicular, perpendicular!
悬崖悬崖来了
Oh, shit!
我靠靠靠
Oh! Oh!
啊啊
Oh!
啊
Come on. That’s it.
来啊这就对了
Come get this delicious brine.
来喝口美味的盐水
Aah!
啊呀