糟糕历史（2009）

Horrible Histories S04E08

Part 6 Jan. 3, 2021, 1 p.m.

This is cutting-edge Tudor dentistry.
当然如果我涂到好牙上
Of course, if I get any on the good teeth
它们也会脱落
they could fall out also,
但鱼和熊掌兼不能得不能兼得
but, huh, you can't have anything, er, I mean everything.
你不能就补下牙什么的吗
Can't you just do a filling or something?
听着我明白你很紧张
Look, I understand your nervousness,
要不然我先拔一颗曼迪的牙
why don't I remove one of Mandy's teeth first
证明不会疼的
just to prove that it's not going to hurt?
我无所谓
That's fine by me.
简直疯了
This is crazy.
不不
No. No,
伦敦主教就是这样为伊丽莎白女王做的
this is what the bishop of London did for Queen Elizabeth.
她担心拔牙会很疼
She was worried that having a tooth out would hurt,
因此主教拔掉了自己的一颗健康牙齿
so the Bishop had a healthy one of his own removed
证明不会疼
to show it wouldn't.
真事
来吧都铎先生拔掉它
Come on, Mr Tudor, whip it out.
对不起我还是疼着吧你们是疯子
I'm sorry, I'll live with the pain, you people are nuts.
既然我都坐在这儿了
While I'm in the chair,
我有颗牙确实有点疼
I do have some pain in one of my teeth.
幸运的是
Well, luckily,
我们正好有对症的药
we've got just the thing.
我知道
I know!
牙医甚至并非都铎时代
And being a dentist wasn't
最不寻常的工作
even the most unusual job in Tudor times.
宝座背后
你好欢迎再次收看《宝座背后》
Hello and welcome once again to Behind the Throne,
汉普顿宫现场报道
本周我们前所未有地获准采访
where this week we've been granted unprecedented access
亨利国王整个王室内最重要的助手
to the most important aid in King Henry's entire household.
托马斯·霍尼奇爵士人称"大便男仆"
Sir Thomas Heneage, the so called groom of the stool.
你好托马斯爵士
Hello, Sir Thomas.
你好吉莉
Hello, Jilly.
必不可少的
And of course a, er,
向您致以崇高敬意国王陛下
a very special hello to you, your majesty.
一如既往的迷人吉莉
Looking lovely as ever, Jilly.
那么告诉我托马斯爵士
So, tell me, Sir Thomas,
大便男仆的工作职责是什么
what does being groom of the stool actually entail?
基本上吉莉
Well, basically, Jilly,
就是说我是他的私人助手
it just means I'm his personal assistant.
我帮他穿衣打扮都好了陛下
I help to dress him, er... All done, sire.
好极了如果不介意的话
Excellent, now if you'll excuse me,
我要去下洗手间
I've got to go to the little boy's room and powder my nose.
没问题国王陛下
Very good, your majesty.
基本上我负责管理他的衣服
Yes, so basically, I look after his clothes,
就像这件华美的外套
like this beautiful jacket here,
是的非常漂亮
Oh, yes, that's beautiful.
是的很好看走你
Yes, it's lovely, there we go.
你究竟在干什么
What on earth are you doing?
这件已经穿过三次了
It's been worn three times,
吉莉必须烧毁它
Jilly, it must be destroyed by fire.
确实有这回事
-没错 -还有陪同他出行
- Right. - Then there's accompanying him on his travels
给他擦屁♥股♥
and wiping his bottom.
这些都... 对不起什么
Well, that'll... Sorry, what?
你可以进来了托米
Ready when you are, Tommy.
这就来国王陛下
Coming, your majesty.
不好意思你说帮他擦屁♥股♥
Sorry, when you say wiping his bottom,
你的意思不会真的是...
you don't actually mean that you... Oh!
好了国王陛下都擦干净了
There you are, your majesty, all polished.
干得漂亮
Arh, splendid.
紧接着吉莉我要分♥析♥一下
And then afterwards, Jilly, I like to analyse it.
大便男仆确实做这些工作
所以你给他擦屁♥股♥
So you, er, you wipe his bottom
然后研究他的屎
and then you look at his poo?
这是很重要的工作吉莉
Oh, it's a very important job, Jilly,
只是为了确认他健康状态良好
just to check that he's in a good state of health.
我们看一看大小不错硬度不错
Let's have a look, mm, good size, good consistency.
对不起托米
Sorry, Tommy,
我好像又酝酿了一点
I've got another one brewing, I think.
然后为了再次确认他的健康状态
And then just to double check he's in good health...
我会吸入皇室后臀的排气
I like to inhale the exhalation of the royal posterior.
所以排气是...
So the exhalation...
有什么不妥吗
Anything bad in that one?
这也确实是他的工作
仿佛天使的呼吸
The breath of an angel.
你觉得呢吉莉你感觉到了吗
What do you think, Jilly, are you getting this?
她知道什么啊她又不是专家
Arh. Oh, what does she know, she's not a professional.
又该擦屁♥股♥了托米
Wiping time again, Tommy.
来了国王陛下
Of course, your majesty.
夸张故事残暴行为*
*Tall tales, atrocious acts,
我们有最吓人的真♥相♥*
*we gave you all the fearsome facts
如果你喜欢本期节目
If you enjoyed that,
就一起来玩吧
why not come and play.
登录CBBC网站点击"糟糕历史"
Go to the CBBC Website and click on Horrible Histories.
等你哟
See you there!
历史不再是个谜*
*The past is no longer a mystery
但愿你喜欢糟糕历史*
*Hope you enjoyed Horrible Histories