糟糕历史（2009）

Horrible Histories S04E03

Part 4 Jan. 3, 2021, 1 p.m.

- Walter! - Your majesty.
希望我没有打扰您
I do hope I'm not disturbing you.
不对黄金单身汉我总是有时间的
No, I always have time for an eligible bachelor
比如像你这样的帅哥
such as your handsome self.
已经不是了
Well, funny you should say that
我找陛下您就是要说这件事
because I was just calling to inform your majesty of my intentions
我要娶贝丝·罗克莫顿为妻
to marry Bess Throckmorton.
什么赶紧下线别碍我的眼
What? Sling your hook! You're blocking my line!
这下只剩达德利了凑合吧
Maybe Dudley will just have to do. Yuck!
他又要结婚跟谁
What? Again? To who?
罗伯特·达德利要结婚了
公共投石超好玩
我将在9月21日迎娶莱蒂斯·诺利斯
都来啊
莱蒂斯·诺利斯
Lettice Knollys!
罗伯特脑子被门挤了啊
Ergh! What on earth would have led Robert
亲一下
戳一下
掐一下
扇一下
竟然看上了莱蒂斯
to develop a taste for Lettice?
都铎香火一事进展如何陛下
Any luck securing the Tudor lineage, your majesty?
没有塞西尔我要放弃了
No, Cecil and I'm just about ready to give up.
等等...
Hang on...
罗伯特·德弗罗也许我把话说早了
Robert Devereux. Ha-ha! I might have spoken too soon!
您有一封邮件
埃塞克斯伯爵
The Earl of Essex?
-他刚给我发邮件啦 -特大喜讯啊
- And he's just emailed me! - Oh, that's excellent news.
都铎邮件
抄送：起义
朋友们、亲人们、贵族和农民们, 是时候了, 让我们
重整旗鼓, 直捣皇宫, 推♥翻♥女王, 夺回我们的土地,
拿回我们应得的东西.
等一下这是封起义书
Wait a minute, this email is about a rebellion!
他要推♥翻♥我塞西尔
He's planning to overthrow me, Cecil!
这傻子这么不小心还抄送给我了
And the fool has CC'd me in by accident.
看我不砍了他
Off with his head!
再考虑看看吧
Let's not be too hasty.
要是找不到丈夫都铎的香火可就断了
You must find a husband or the Tudor lineage is finished.
找到罗伯特·德弗罗
我要他的项上人头
其实我已经结婚了
The truth is, I am already married.
您说真的陛下
Really, your majesty?
-您嫁给了谁 -英格兰
- To whom? - To England.
说得好陛下那我先下啦
Well said, Ma'am. And with that, I bid you adieu.
她真的没戏了
Oh, she's really lost it.
我还听得见塞西尔
I'm still here, Cecil.
那什么我是说那个...
Erm, er, what I meant was, erm...
沃尔特·雷利结婚没有请示伊丽莎白一世
what did Elizabeth I do when walter raleigh got married
女王是怎么对他的
without seeking her permission
A 给他写了封信表达自己的愤怒
Did she A: Send him an angry letter
B 禁止他出入朝堂
B: Ban him from court
还是C 把他关进监狱
Or C: throw him in prison
答案是...C
The answer is...C
伊丽莎白把沃尔特和他的新婚妻子贝丝
Elizabeth had Walter and his new wife, Bess,
关进了伦敦塔
imprisoned in the Tower of London.
邪恶的维多利亚时代
大家好我是广♥告♥人
Hi! I'm a shouty man,
我要向您展示的是新大西部铁路
and I'm here to tell you about the new Great Western Railway,
维多利亚时代的运输革命
the Victorian Transport Revolution.
您是否厌倦了嘈杂的伦敦生活
Tired of the busy London life?
您的鼻子是否总是蹭上磨石
Always got your nose to the grindstone?
[比喻埋头苦干]
那就快去伟大的西部旅行吧
Then why not take a trip to the Great West Country
大西部铁路公♥司♥会为您提供
on one of the Great Western Railway's
准确便捷的时刻表
conveniently timetabled services.
怎么在动我还没给钱呢
We're moving! I haven't paid!
不是一点才开吗
Oh, I thought it left at 1 o'clock!
的确但您说的是哪个时间呢
Ah, yes, but do you mean 1 o'clock
伦敦时间史云顿时间
London time, Swindon time,
还是布里斯托尔时间
or Bristol time?
我糊涂了
I'm confused.
这个问题非常复杂
It's perfectly complicated!
路线经过的城镇时区都有些微不同
Towns along the route use slightly different time zones
所以每个人的时间也都有不同
so not everyone agrees what time it is.
多亏了巴斯外箱式铁路隧♥道♥的开创性修建
Yes! Thanks to the completion of the groundbreaking Box railway tunnel
现在你只需要四小时就可以从吵闹的伦敦
just outside Bath, you can now travel from loud London
到达美丽的布里斯托尔啦
to beautiful Bristol in just four hours!
多美好的一次旅行啊
And what a journey it is.
您可以呼吸乡间的新鲜空气
You can take in the fresh, country air.
烟灰跑我眼睛里去了
Soot in my eyes!
还可以在令人心醉的史云顿做片刻小憩
And take a comfort break in stunning Swindon.
不好意思火车上没厕所
Excuse me. There are no facilities on the train.
请问厕所在哪里
Where are the toilets, please?
女用在这头男用在那头
Ladies down that end, gents down that end.
-就在站台上 -不会差多少的
- On the platform? - Good a place as anywhere,
提醒你啊小心滑倒
though I should warn you it can get a bit splashy.
您还可以在我们可爱的咖啡厅
And enjoy a bowl of fresh soup
享受一碗鲜美的汤水
in our delightful cafe.
一分钟后火车离站
We'll depart in one minute.
这汤太烫了不能喝太快
This soup is too hot to drink quickly!
我知道这样明天的锅里才不会少汤嘛
I know. Which means lots of leftovers to go back in the pot for tomorrow.
这锅已经维持了一个礼拜了
This lot's been going round for weeks now.
快上车
On board!
这些都将让您在到达布里斯托尔时
All of which means you'll arrive in Bristol
放松振奋无忧无虑
relaxed, revived, and carefree.
-旅途愉快吗先生 -你说呢
- Good journey, sir? - What do you think?
伟大的西部铁路
The Great Western Railway.
-伟大个屁 -很伟大别理他
- It's not great! - It is great. Ignore him.
很伟大的真的
It is, it is.
的确
It's true.
1840年前英国每个镇子用的时间
The time was not the same in every town in Britain
都不一样
until 1840.
甚至在1840年后
And even after that,
各个镇子上装的钟
different towns had complicated clocks
都会有三个或四个指针来显示
with three or four hands to show different times
不同地点的不同时间
in different places.
"什么时候了"
"What's the time?"
"反正到你该买♥♥个钟的时候了"
"Time to get a new clock, mate!" Ha-ha!
伟大的维多利亚机构之邮政服务
Great Victorian Institutiions, the Postal Service.
好了好了听到了来了
Yes, yes, all right! All right, I'm coming.
-什么事 -您的信夫人
- Yes? - Postman, ma'am.
-好的 -邮费两便士谢谢
- Right. - That's tuppence for the delivery, please.
好没问题
Oh, right, fine.
-记在我的账上 -好的祝您愉
- Charge it to my account. - Will do. Have a nice...
快
day.
天啊
Come on!
您的信夫人
Postman, madam.
但你刚刚才来过
But you were just here.
抱歉还有一封邮费两便士谢谢
More post, I'm afraid. Tuppence for the delivery, please.
没问题记到账上
Fine. Charge it to my account.
记账好的祝您愉...快
On the account, OK. Have a nice...day.
疯了
Cheek.
我就快...
I am going...
能不能让我清静一会
Why won't you leave me alone?
这是维多利亚时代邮政的乐趣所在夫人
Well, that's the joy of the Victorian postal service, madam.
每天最多12封风雨无阻
Up to 12 deliveries a day come rain or shine
一天最多曾送过12封信
且收费合理
and all for a reasonable charge.
两便士知道了记到账上
Tuppence, yes, I know. Charge it to my account.
好的夫人
On the account, madam.
快把我逼...
He is driving me...
真够了
Right!
两便士记账滚
Tuppence! Account! Go!
-这封免费夫人 -免费
- No charge, madam. - No charge?
没错
That's right. You see,
我们刚引进了新的一便士邮递系统
we've just introduced a new penny post system
[普通信件无论远近均收一便士邮资]
由寄信人
whereby the person posting the letter
贴这种面值为一便士的邮票
pays for the delivery in advance,with these postage stamps,
[1840年英国发行世界上第一张邮票]