熟女镇（2009）
Cougar Town
第六季
剧集 | 熟女镇（2009） | 导航列表
熟女镇（2009）
Cougar Town S06E12
Part 2
Dec. 8, 2020, 11 p.m.
How about a house call?"
"要不要我去你家出个诊"
Definitely do not send that.
千万别这么发
In hindsight,
回过头想想
maybe I should have asked for feedback before I pressed send.
也许我应该先问下大家的意见再点发送
Eighth! I can't be eighth!
第八 我不能只排第八
Relax. It's just kissing.
放松 只是接吻而已
You're still number one in the most important category.
在最重要的领域你还是排在第一名的
And, uh, what category is that?
是嘛 那是什么领域呢
Shoot! I should've something ready.
该死 我应该编好个什么东西的
Mary thought the text was funny.
玛丽觉得那条短♥信♥很幽默
She said we should go out tomorrow.
她说愿意明天跟我约会
Tom, that's amazing.
汤姆 那太棒了
It's incredible. It's all downhill from here.
很棒 但在这之后只会每况愈下了
I am gonna be nervous and weird.
我会很紧张 举止怪异
She's gonna think I'm creepy, walk out on the date,
她会觉得我是个奇葩 在约会时跑掉
and then I'm gonna have to kill myself.
然后我会无地自容只好自杀
Probably easier to just cancel.
也许还是取消约会比较好
Tom, take it easy.
汤姆 放轻松
You are built like a stepladder. Wow!
你结实得像个四脚梯
This date is gonna be fine.
约会将会很顺利
We just got to get you to that first kiss
我们只需帮你争取到第一个吻
so you can relax and be yourself.
之后你就能放松做自己了
How do I get to the kiss? I'm a mess.
我怎么能争取到接吻呢 我糟透了
Do you have any romantic skills you can bring to the table?
你有什么拿得出手的浪漫招数吗
Let's see.
让我想想
I'm pretty good with turtles. All right.
我和乌龟相处得很和谐 好
One of my knees bends both ways.
我有个膝盖可以弯向两个方向
Uh, I'm fluent in Gutnish,
我会说一口流利的哥特兰语
which is a long-dead nordic dialect.
那是个绝迹已久的日耳曼族方言
I'm a terrific dancer. That's it.
我很会跳舞 就是它了
Great! Wait. Uh, the Gutnish or the dancing?
太好了 慢着 是哥特兰语还是跳舞
Okay. This is how the date's gonna go.
听着 约会将这样进行
You'll pick Mary up,
你先去接上玛丽
being very charming
你会表现得很迷人
because I coached you on what to say.
因为我教给了你该说什么
Grayson will be close by
格雷森会躲在附近
in case you start to get weird.
以防你开始变得怪异
You'll take a romantic bike ride into town,
你们会浪漫地骑着单车去市中心
and if you start to say something creepy,
如果你说了什么诡异的话
just pedal faster or slower to get away from her.
就骑快点或者慢点 与她拉开距离
You'll go to a romantic movie,
你们会去看一场浪漫爱情电影
where there's no talking at all.
整个过程你不需要说话
You'll pass a man who needs help
你们会路过一个需要救助的人
and blow Mary's mind with your doctor skills.
你的医术会令玛丽对你刮目相看
Then off to drinks at the pub with friends.
之后就到酒吧和朋友们小酌几杯
I'll tell a funny story that makes everyone laugh.
我会讲个好笑的故事让大家开怀大笑
When a romantic song comes on the jukebox,
当点唱机里响起一首浪漫歌♥曲时
you and Mary will dance.
你和玛丽会一起跳舞
And then you'll kiss her and say...
然后你会亲吻她 对她说
I've been waiting for you my whole life.
我一生都在等待你的出现
I told you it would work.
告诉过你能成功的吧
Wait, so part of your fantasy
等等 所以你幻想中的一部分
is bragging to me that it worked.
是对我吹嘘说你成功了吗
Yep. But I never said that it wouldn't.
是的 但我从没说过这不会成功啊
Dude, this is Tom's thing.
哥们 这是汤姆的人生大事
Don't make it about you.
别抢风头
Yeah, pipe down, ace.
没错 消停点 蠢货
For once, this is about me.
这次终于轮到我主场了
Actually, I've been doing so much planning about this,
实际上 我为这事做了这么多策划
I kind of think it's about me.
有点觉得这是我的大事了
Oh, I know, sweetie.
我知道 亲爱的
Okay, Tom, how are you feeling!
好的 汤姆 你怎么样
Great. I'm gonna crush my date.
很好 我会搞垮我的约会对象
I mean, crush the date.
我是说 搞定这次约会
Less talking.
少说话
Are you wearing the shirt I got you?
你穿了我给你买♥♥的上衣吗
Oof course. I'm on it. And the pants?
当然 穿着呢 裤子呢
Turning around.
掉头回去换
Don't worry.
别担心
We'll have those knees covered up in no time.
他的膝盖很快就会被遮起来了
I really think this is gonna work.
我真心觉得这次能成
Jules, this is really sweet,
茱尔斯 你这么做很贴心
But Tom is less of a "Nice date" guy
但汤姆并不是那种迷人的约会对象
than a "Damp rag and duct tape" guy.
他更像是个会用湿抹布和胶带的变♥态♥大叔
His cologne is chloroform.
他满身都是氯仿味
Are you two gonna sit there like asses,
你们两个是要坐在这里说坏话
or are you gonna help?
还是要帮忙
Sit like asses. The ass one.
坐在这说坏话 说坏话
All right, you're on creepy patrol.
好吧 你负责监察怪异举止
Get to Mary's house,
去玛丽家
and as soon as you do, I want you to --
到了以后马上...
Uh, you may be ninth now.
你现在可能排到第九了
Damn it!
该死
Oh, you know, I'm not worried about Tom.
知道吗 我并不担心汤姆
I've coached him on what to say in everything.
我教给了他每个情形下要说的话
Hello, Mary. How about a bike ride?
你好 玛丽 一起去骑车好吗
Sounds perfect.
太好了
And what a beautiful home.
你家真漂亮
Except the windows are a little low to the ground.
只是窗户离地面有点近
It'd be real easy for someone to climb in late at night
这样别人会很容易在深夜爬进你家
and sniff your hair while you're asleep.
趁你熟睡时嗅你头发的味道
Sweet biscuits!
好疼
I mean, you want to get going?
我是说 我们出发吧
Grayson, how's operation "Keep tom from talking creepy" going?
格雷森 "防止汤姆说怪话"行动进行得如何
Well, it still has a sucky title,
这个行动的名字还是很难听
and Tom's having trouble creating separation on the bikes.
汤姆在尝试拉开距离 但有点力不从心
Do you have any hobbies?
你有什么爱好
I like playing with dolls.
我喜欢玩洋娃娃
Did you say "Playing with dolls"?
你刚刚是说"玩洋娃娃"吗
What? Are you smiling at my headset?
怎么 你们在笑我的耳机吗
I probably look like Sigourney Weaver
我大概看起来像西格妮·韦弗
in that movie with the alien.
在那部外星人电影里的造型
Do you mean "Alien"?
你是说《异形》吗
I don't think it's called that. Well, you're wrong.
我觉得不是那个名字 你错了
Guys, I really think Tom's gonna win Mary over.
各位 我真的觉得汤姆能赢得玛丽的心
Wrong again, 'cause no matter
又错了 因为无论这场约会
how good this date goes
进行得多顺利
or any future dates,
或是以后的任何约会
eventually, she's gonna have to see him naked.
到最后 她总会看到他的裸体
That would be a game-over moment
如果真能到那个地步
if there ever was one.
那会是结束一切的时刻
Well, if you two are just gonna be negative,
如果你们两个要这么消极
why don't you just leave?
不如还是离开这里吧
Do you know what? She's right.
你知道吗 她说得对
We could just go to the plaza
我们可以去广场那里
and watch this date blow up in person.
亲眼目睹这场约会以失败告终
That's a great idea.
这主意很赞
I'm in the plaza, Jules,
我在广场了 茱尔斯
just like we planned.
一切按计划进行
Tom's gonna be there soon. Do you have the movie tickets?
汤姆很快会到 你买♥♥到电影票了吗
Tickets in hand, Tom in sight,
票在手上 我看到汤姆了
just like we planned.
一切按计划进行
Why do you keep saying "Just like we planned it"
你为什么在每句话最后都说
after everything?
"一切按计划进行"
I'm not doing that.
我没有啊
Just like we planned.
一切按计划进行
Okay, I am doing that. Sorry.
好吧 我的确在说 抱歉
Oh, weird here today.
今天这里怪怪的
Very, uh...Leathery.
好多人穿皮革
Leathery like old?
老式皮衣吗
熟女镇（2009）
Cougar Town
剧集 | 熟女镇（2009） | 导航列表