把妹大作战（2014）

Undateable S02E11

Part 3 Dec. 2, 2020, 3:36 p.m.

Uh, pl-- please don't take this the wrong way,
别会错意了
but we have been saying some awful things about you.
但我们都狠狠吐槽了你一番
It seems to make her like us more.
这样好像能让她更喜欢我们
Also, we may or may not have been doing impressions of you.
而且我们也许有也许没有模仿你
Like you got to talk really fast
比如说你说话超快
and find what you're saying
然后在说话的同时
in the middle of what you're saying,
才想到在说些什么
and hopefully, everybody will understand.
希望大家都会明白你
Also, you got to do flappy hands
还有你每次亮明观点时
whenever you got to make a point.
都会扑腾双手
Okay, so, okay, baby bird? Okay.
好吗小小鸟好的
Oh, yeah, well,
好吧
It doesn't even matter what you say,
你们说的话根本不重要
and that's obvious, so whatever.
那很明显所以随便啦
That's obvious.
很明显
What's up, bro?
怎么了哥们
Wow. It's like you knew I needed a beer.
好像你知道我像喝啤酒一样
I-I thought you were at the bar.
我还以为你在酒吧呢
I was until I found out
之前是啊直到我发现
our friends are trying to get in on Sabrina's good side
我们的朋友在努力和塞布丽娜搞好关系
by talking crap about me
通过吐槽我
and doing impressions that don't bother me at all, but...
以及模仿我的行为我其实一点也不在乎但是
You know, I got to tell you, baby bird --
我得告诉你小小鸟
It makes me appreciate your loyalty even more, huh?
这让我更感激你的忠诚了
What -- why is my beer half done
为什么我的啤酒被人喝了一半
and taste like a Bob Marley album?
尝起来像是鲍勃·马利的专辑
Justin, thanks for having me -- oh.
贾斯丁谢谢你邀请我...
Looks like the husband is home.
看来丈夫回家了
Guess that makes me the other man.
这样我就成小三了
Okay, all right, yes, Kevin is here.
好吧没错凯文来了
Do you think you could just calm down?
你觉得自己可以淡定点吗
You know what? You're a betrayer!
知道吗你是个叛徒
You are a betrayer! All right?
你是个叛徒好吗
This is not how you're supposed to act in a marriage!
在一段婚姻中你不该这样做
Oh -- oh, you're one to talk.
你真能说
do you know that he comes to the bar every day --
你知道吗他每天都去酒吧
never asks me how my day is.
从来不问我过得怎么样
That's exactly what ended my marriage --
就是这个终结了我的婚姻
That and, uh, turning a little gay in prison.
这个以及在监狱里变基了一点
I can't believe you made a vegetable plate
不敢相信你为我们的死敌
for our sworn enemy.
做了蔬菜拼盘
You stole his light. He could have called the cops.
你偷了他的灯他可能报♥警♥的
He's not gonna call the cops. He's a criminal, all right?
他不会报♥警♥的他就是罪犯好吗
Yes, I will. I'll do it.
我会的我会报♥警♥的
All I need is 72 hours to get my urine clean,
我只需要72小时不吸毒让尿里没有药物
and then boom, boom, boom -- I'm a doctor again.
然后砰砰砰我又是医生了
You were a doctor?!
你是医生吗
I handled this right.
我的处理方式是对的
All right, Kevin and I sat down like adults,
凯文和我像成年人一样坐下
and we worked it out peacefully.
我们和平地解决了问题
He's not gonna have the light in our direction
他不会拿灯对着我们这边
so that we could sleep.
我们可以好好睡觉了
Problem solved.
问题解决了
No, no, no, no, no, no.
不不不
That was before Danny came blazing in here,
那是在丹尼闯进来
getting all up in my lady catcher.
激起了我少女杀手之心之前
Now I want an apology from... him.
现在我想要他道歉了
Oh, really? Yeah.
真的吗是啊
Well...You're not gonna get an apology from me.
我才不会向你道歉
And hold on --
等等
Let me download some other information for you.
让我下载其它信息
Steven Seagal's fat, and he's bad at karate.
史蒂文·西格尔超级肥而且不擅长空手道
Your mouth just wrote a check
你的嘴刚写了一张
that your body can't cash, bro.
你的身体无法兑现的支票哥们
Hands up. Hands up.
举起手来举起手来
Hands up!
举起手来
Karate! Karate! Karate! Karate!
空手道空手道空手道空手道
Karate! All righty!
空手道好了
All right. All right.
好了好了
All right. Hey!
好了
Now, you two obviously don't know
你俩显然对空手道
anything about karate.
一无所知
Can we just stop this?
咱能别闹了吗
Okay, fine.
好吧
Arigato.
谢谢[日语]
Soba noodles.
荞麦面
I'm still not apologizing.
我还是不打算道歉
Fine.
好吧
I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.
我告诉你我要怎么做吧
Since you two are so tight,
既然你俩这么要好
I'm gonna let Justin apologize for you.
我让贾斯丁替你道歉
Well, you know what?
知道吗
He's never gonna do that because we're a team.
他不会那样做的因为我们是一支团队
Kevin. Hey, baby bird, no.
凯文小小鸟不要
What are you doing? Kevin!
你在干什么凯文
On behalf of Danny, I want to apologize.
我代表丹尼向你道歉
I'm sorry for the way that he acted.
对不起他那样做了
Thank you.
谢谢
I'm just gonna grab my light now,
我现在要拿起我的灯
and I'm gonna get out of here.
离开这里
You need help?
你要忙吗
I got it!
老子可以的
I still got it!
老子还是可以的
That is when Kevin and Danny
那时凯文和丹尼
had the world's weirdest karate fight.
进行了世界上最诡异的空手道战斗
You know what a mugger recently told me?
你知道一个抢劫犯最近和我说了什么吗
Being good at video-game karate
在空手道游戏中很出色
does not make you good at regular karate.
并不意味着你在现实中也很擅长空手道
That lady took my wallet and my dignity.
那个女人抢走了我的钱包和自尊
Hey. The gang's all here.
大伙儿都在啊
You making fun of me, or what?
你们要不要取笑我啊
God. Get over yourself, Danny.
天啊少自以为是了丹尼
Not everything is about you.
并非所有事都是关于你的
Hey, you guys, you know what I like about Sabrina?
各位你们知道我喜欢塞布丽娜哪点吗
She never talks crap behind my back.
她从来不在我背后说我坏话
She always says it right to my face.
总是当面打脸
Thanks, Sabrina.
谢谢塞布丽娜
Aww. No one will ever love you.
没人会爱你
Danny, I don't know why you're making
丹尼我不知道你为什么
such a big deal about a light.
对一盏灯这么小题大做
It was never about the light. It was always about friendship.
重点不在于灯而是友谊
Now, you guys all know that I have your back, all right?
你们都知道我会挺你们
Well, we seemed to forget about that
我们好像都忘了这点
when we were all busy making fun of Danny
那时我们都在取笑丹尼
and his flappy hands just to get in good with Sabrina.
和他的扑腾手就为了和塞布丽娜搞好关系
And, Brett, really?
布雷特没搞错吧
I mean, I feel like if it wasn't for me
我是说我觉得如果不是我
pushing you to ask guys out,
催促你约男人出去
then you'd still be dating women that look like offensive linemen
你会还在和长得像橄榄球进攻前锋的女人约会
cause that's your type for some reason.
因为出于某种原因那是你喜欢的类型
I did like them large and in charge.
我喜欢体型庞大有控制欲的女人
And the two of you, you guys can't even look at me.
还有你俩都不敢看我
It's like I can see the weight of the guilt,
我好像能看见内疚感
just pressing down on your shoulders.
压在你们肩上
It's like I'm giving myself a piggyback ride.
好像我骑在自己肩膀上一样
And, Leslie, really, my sister, my own flesh and blood?
还有莱丝莉我的姐姐我的家人
Well, I got a question for you.
我要问你一个问题
Who was the man to vow never to tell anybody
是谁发誓绝不把这件事告诉别人
that the day you were born,
那就是你出生时
you had a thick, black coat of hair
你全身覆盖着一层