把妹大作战（2014）

Undateable S02E01

Part 2 Dec. 2, 2020, 3:32 p.m.

So, I'm gonna go.
我要走了
I'll see you around -- or not around, you know?
回头见或者不见
It kind of felt like this was a one-night thing.
这感觉有点像是一♥夜♥情♥
Not that you're that type of girl.
不是说你是那种姑娘
I mean, you deserve many nights.
你值得很多夜
I was lucky to get one.
我能跟你一♥夜♥情♥是三生有幸
I-I guess, uh, um -- um -- what I'm trying to say is...
我猜我想说的是
Hold.
等等
...we should -- we should go out again.
我们应该再次约会
I didn't think that's what this was, but what the hell?
我觉得这不是那么回事但是管他呢
Bye, Erica. It was great seeing you.
再见艾丽卡见到你很高兴
Hey, man.
哥们
You want to do this now or later? Now.
你想现在来还是待会儿现在
Okay.
好了
Operation booty recall is in full effect.
再次约炮行动全面启动
This heist will be exactly like "Ocean's Eleven,"
这次抢劫会跟《十一罗汉》一样
only instead of misters pitt and clooney
只不过扮演令人垂涎的飞贼的
portraying mouthwatering cat burglars...
不是皮特和克鲁尼先生
Sorry, got lost there for a second.
抱歉有点走神了
And, yes, Candace, before you ask, I am gay.
对坎迪斯你不用问我就是基佬
I had no idea,
我完全不知道呢
because all of my gay friends are in great shape.
因为我所有的基佬朋友身材都超好
I'm so sorry.
对不起
Off you pop. Okay.
你走吧好
Shelly, you are gonna keep
谢利你要缠住
the douchey gym manager occupied.
健身房♥经理那个混♥蛋♥
I need to know more about my character.
我得更了解我的角色
Can I be a Japanese businessman?
我可以演一个日本商人吗
Sure, why not?
当然啦为什么不呢
Then I'll create a distraction
那我就搬起
by lifting a tremendous amount of weight --
超重的东西让他们分心
getting banged by everyone's eyes
被大家视奸
checking out my bis, tris, and thighs.
看着我的肱二头肌肱三头肌和大腿
That's absolutely horrifying.
太吓人了
So when the douchey gym manager goes up to Burski,
当混♥蛋♥健身房♥经理走向伯斯科时
I'll switch Leslie's poster out for a new one,
我会把莱丝莉的海报换成新的
and just like that, we're gone.
就这样我们就全身而退了
Whose butt are you gonna use for the fake poster?
你要用谁的臀部做假海报
Candace, we need a favor.
坎迪斯我们需要你帮个忙
Oh, please. She's so tiny.
拜托她好瘦小
She could go camping in my panties.
她可以穿着我的裤子去露营
Quick question --
快速问问
Where would someone sign up for the panty camping?
裤裤露营在哪里报名啊
No, no, I got it.
不不交给我吧
You can tell them.
你可以告诉他们
Justin blew the one-night stand.
贾斯丁搞砸了一♥夜♥情♥
He couldn't let Erica leave,
他没法让艾丽卡走
and now he's dating a girl he doesn't even like.
现在他要跟不喜欢的女孩约会了
She came back in for her keys and I panicked.
她回来拿钥匙结果我慌张了
Oh, you never go back in.
你不能回头
I've left behind keys, purses, a dog.
我丢过钥匙包包一只狗
I'm like the opposite of a navy seal.
我是海豹突击队员的反面
I leave everything behind.
我将一切都抛弃
This is like Amanda all over again.
这简直是阿曼达事件重演
That was Justin's college girlfriend.
那是贾斯丁大学里的女朋友
Justin wanted out but he couldn't end it,
贾斯丁想分手但他没法分
so they stayed together until she graduated
所以他们一直在一起直到她
with a degree in zoology and moved to the Congo
拿到了动物学学位毕业搬去了刚果
to follow her dream of living with the baboons.
追寻她跟狒狒住一起的梦想
How did you finally let her know it was over?
你最后怎么告诉她结束了的
Unfortunately, we weren't able to have that conversation
不幸的是我们还没来得及聊这个
before she was torn apart and eaten by the baboons.
她就被狒狒撕裂吃掉了
Why don't you just tell her
你为什么不直接给她说
you're not remotely interested in any type of relationship?
你对任何恋爱关系都不感兴趣
Just dagger her, man. No!
开门见山不
I'm not that heartless.
我没那么无情
Did she text me today
她今天有没有发短♥信♥给我
and ask if I want to go to brunch tomorrow? Yeah.
问我明天想不想一起吃早午餐有
Am I actually gonna go?
我真的要去吗
Yes. I love brunch.
是啊我爱早午餐
Look, we'll go on a couple dates,
我们要约会几次
then I'm gonna take a "Business trip."
然后我要去出差
Spoiler alert -- I'm not on a business trip.
剧透警告我不是去出差
I'm just home catching up on "Scandal."
我只是在家补《丑闻》
Then she'll meet someone else.
然后她会遇见别人
She'll let me down easy. No one gets hurt.
她会放过我没人会受伤
Just nobody tell Nicki that I'm fake-dating someone.
谁也不许告诉尼基我在和别人假约会
Should we not tell her while she's real-dating someone?
而她在跟别人真约会吗
And a beer for my new favorite teddy bear
给我最爱的新泰迪熊来杯啤酒
whose name is...
他的名字是...
When I was a kid, I accidentally ate my teddy bear's eyes.
我小时候我不小心吃了泰迪熊的眼睛
We couldn't afford a new one
我们买♥♥不起新的
because of my dad's gambling problem,
因为我爸爸赌博
so I made eyes out of pasta shells -- Shelly!
所以我用面片做了眼睛谢利
That was an incredibly sad ride,
真是超悲伤的经历
but I'm glad you got there.
但我很高兴你想到了
She's a breath of fresh air but a dreadful waitress.
她是个小美女也是个糟糕的女服务员
I did not order a hot dog.
我没有点热狗
Nor do they serve hot dogs here.
他们这里也不卖♥♥热狗
Erica. Hey. What are you doing here?
艾丽卡你来这里干什么
I was just leaving.
我正准备走
Hey, maybe in the future, try harder to be a real man.
也许以后努力做个真男人吧
Will do.
好啊
Why would she say that?
她为什么那样说
Uh, I think she was just offering
我觉得她只是在提
some friendly advice, you know?
一些友好的建议
Uh, also, I broke up with her for you.
而且我帮你跟她分手了
What kind of person breaks up with a girl for another man?
哪种人会帮别人跟他女人分手啊
A best friend, a hero, a mentor.
最好的朋友英雄导师
I could go on.
我可以继续
I didn't want to do this A warrior.
我不想这样战士
I didn't want to do this your way, all right?
我不想按你的方式来好吗
I didn't want to be a bad guy.
我不想做个坏人
Whoa, wait. Hold on one second.
等等等会儿
You think I'm a bad guy.
我觉得我是个坏人
Yeah, I just said that.
是啊我刚说过呢
That's not true. I'm always trying to help you.
不是的我一直都想帮你
You guys heard what he did,
你们听到了他做的事
so let's take a little vote.
我们来投个票吧
If you think Danny's a bad guy, raise your hand.
如果你们觉得丹尼是个坏人就举手
What about you, Candace?
你呢坎迪斯
No, thank you. I really need this job.
不了谢谢我真的很需要这份工作
So I'm just trying to learn names and make friends.
所以我只打算记名字交朋友
Don't worry, sweetheart. You have plenty of friends here.
别担心亲爱的你在这里有很多朋友
Thank you, and, uh...
谢谢
Wait, your name is easy to remember
等等你名字很容易记
because when we first met, based off of your clothing
因为我们第一次见面时根据你穿的衣服
and the way you rubbed my shoulders,
还有你摩擦我肩膀的方式
I thought for sure you were a lesbi--
我还以为你肯定是拉拉
Leslie!
莱丝莉
Oh. Konnichiwa.
你好
I'm a Japanese businessman.
我是个日本商人
You mean you're a businessman from Japan.
你是说你是个来自日本的商人
Oh, no. I'm of Japanese descent.
不我是日本人
I think I was very clear on that.
我想我说得很清楚了
All right, I got 275 coming up.
好吧马上是275个了
Oh, my god!
天啊
Big mistake! Help me! Help me! Help me!
犯了个大错帮帮我帮帮我
That's your British butt, isn't it?
那是你的屁♥股♥ 对吧
Well, a little free advertising never hurt anyone, mate.
免费的广♥告♥又不会伤害谁哥们