再造淑女（2014）

Selfie S01E13

Part 3 Oct. 24, 2020, 9:48 p.m.

I'd like to ask about the time --
我想问一下你什么时候...
Yeah. I have a question, Corynn.
我有个问题科琳
What does it feel like to be a big fat liar?!
做个胖子大骗子是什么感觉
For starters, I'm certainly not fat.
首先显然我不是个胖子
Hey! You heard me! Liar!
别装傻了大骗子
Eliza! You still look super hot.
伊莉莎你还是那么惹火
Do you remember me?
你还记得我吗
Security!
保安
I got her! She's mine! I got her! Get away from me!
交给我我来交给我离我远点
Just get out of my way! Corynn...
不要挡路科琳
If you were voted "Most butt,"
如果你被选为最丑霉女
then who was voted "Most popular," Huh? Me?
那最受欢迎的人是谁难道是我吗
Come on, Corynn. I really wanna know.
说啊科琳我真的很想知道
Those are my stories! I'm Corynn McWatters!
她说的故事是我的我是科琳·麦克沃特斯
Uhh! I'm Corynn!
我才是科琳
The second she walks out, I'm gonna jump her.
只要她一走出来我就跟她撕逼
I'm gonna jump her! You can't stop me!
我要跟她撕逼你拦不住我的
She's not jumping anyone, sir.
她不会跟人撕逼的先生
As long she doesn't jump her inside the store,
只要她不在店里面跟她撕逼就行
we're good.
别的我不管
You are a grown woman. You are not jumping anyone.
你是个成年人了你不能去跟人撕逼
Corynn is a lying monster!
科琳就是个大骗子
Which is exactly why I said she's not a good role model.
所以我才说她不是个好模范啊
This is consistent
从你告诉我的事中
with everything you've told me about her.
我早就听出来了
I can't fathom why you're so surprised.
我不懂你为什么一副很吃惊的样子
Henry, I don't need you to be right right now, okay?
亨利我现在不需要你说对什么知道吗
Okay.
好
Corynn has taught me that everything about myself is wrong --
科琳告诉我我的一切都是错误的
The way I walked,
我走路的样子
the way I talked,
我说话的样子
the way I dressed.
我所穿的衣服
And I-I worked really hard
我真的很努力
to change that person.
去改变那个人
To not be that person.
去不做那个人
And then she... she stole that person.
可是然后她却...偷了那个人的故事
When you're young,
人年轻的时候
everybody pretends to be something they're not.
总是喜欢假装成别人的样子
I used to tell people my dad invented velcro.
我以前还跟别人说我爸发明了维可牢尼龙搭扣
I used to tell people I was good at skateboarding
我跟人说过我擅长玩滑板
even though I wasn't.
其实不是
I thought it made me seem cool.
我觉得这样说会让我很酷
You're not cool.
你才不酷
No.
是啊
I never was.
我就没有酷过
But she is.
但是她很酷
It's open!
门开着
It's open?
竟然开着
I really wish you wouldn't do that.
我真心希望你以后不要这样了
Somebody could come right in here.
否则随便什么人都能进来
There's nothing anyone can take
科琳·麦克沃特斯已经
that hasn't already been taken by Corynn McWatters
把我的一切都偷走了没什么可偷的了
except for this crystal Pepsi that I bought on eBay.
除了我在网上买♥♥的这瓶水晶百事
I can't believe what I'm seeing.
真不敢相信我眼前的景象
I know, right? It only cost $80.
谁说不是啊这个才80块
$80? All right, we're -- we're gonna come back to that.
80块好吧这个我们回头再说
I can't believe you're letting Corynn McWatters
真不敢相信你竟然要让科琳·麦克沃特斯
get away with this.
轻易逃脱了
What am I supposed to do? She's Corynn McWatters.
那我该怎么办她可是科琳·麦克沃特斯
And you're Eliza Dooley.
而你是伊莉莎·杜丽啊
You are the same girl
你可是那个
who gave Ryan Gosling's cousin a lap dance
在恩西诺的家庭派对上给瑞恩·高斯林[演员]的表兄
at a house party in Encino.
跳大腿舞的人啊
Or was that some other Eliza Dooley?
还是说那是另一个伊莉莎·杜丽
No. That was me.
不那就是我
I-I imagine that required a fair amount of bravery on your part.
那会儿你那样做肯定需要很大的勇气吧
Oh. It did. There was no music on.
确实当时音乐都没有
Okay, then. Where's that girl?
当时的那个姑娘去哪里了
Right here.
就在这里
Yeah!
就是这样
Whoo! Yeah!
这就对了
Okay.
行了
This is -- okay. All right. All -- okay.
行了行了行了
Your leg is...
你的腿...
I don't want you to give me a lap dance.
我不是让你给我跳大腿舞
I want you to stop feeling sorry for yourself
我是想让你不要自怨自艾了
and start standing up for yourself.
自己为自己争取吧
You have a lot to be proud of.
你有很多可以引以为傲的事
Yeah. Yeah!
对是吧
I also dry humped Macklemore.
我还跟麦克默[歌♥手]贴身热舞过
After a good night's sleep
美美睡了一觉
and some extra strength tylenol,
又多吃了强效泰诺止痛片之后
I decided to approach Corynn
我决定去找科琳
and have a calm, rational conversation about
跟她进行一场冷静理智的对话
what a trifling-ass bitch she was.
谈谈她怎么是个大贱♥人♥
Okay, I want a fair fight. Okay.
你们俩公平斗争去吧
Her kids are nearby, so nothing below the belt. Go.
她的孩子都在你说话注意点去吧
Hi, Corynn.
你好科琳
Remember me?
还记得我吗
Aren't you the crazy woman who was escorted out of my reading last night?
你不就是那个昨晚被撵出读书会的疯子吗
Yes, she is. Sorry.
正是她不好意思
But I'm also Eliza.
但我也是伊莉莎
Eliza Dooley.
伊莉莎·杜丽
"Most butt."
最丑霉女
Eliza? Wow.
伊莉莎是你啊
I haven't said this since I became a mother,
自打我当了母亲后就没这么说过了
but holy xxx, you look amazing. I know.
但是我xx 你看起来真不错啊我知道
You're like a totally different person.
你就跟变了一个人一样
No, you are a totally different person.
不你才是变了一个人
Specifically, my person.
具体来说是变成我了
More specifically, the person I used to be.
更具体来说是变成以前的我了
To be, uh, super specific, you stole her identity.
再具体一点的话就是你偷了她的故事
Which, depending on the state,
根据我们州的法律
is anything from a first-degree felony
你罪行可至三♥级♥轻罪
to a third-degree misdemeanor.
到一级重罪
So kiss your kids goodbye, Corynn.
所以你趁早跟你的孩子道别吧科琳
You're going to prison.
你要去坐牢了
She's -- she's not going to prison.
她...她不会因此坐牢的
That's a different kind of identity theft.
会犯罪的那是另一种身份盗窃
She was never that bright.
她脑子一直都不好使
This was a really bad idea.
这个主意糟透了
Let's just get out of here.
我们还是快点走吧
Eliza... No, no.
伊莉莎不不
I'm sorry I stole your sad-sack,
抱歉我偷了你那个悲惨的
"Most butt" nonexistence.
最丑霉女事件
Apology accepted. Thanks, Corynn.
没关系谢谢科琳
But I just need that backstory more than you do.
但是我比你更需要那个背景故事
No one wants life lessons and dinner planning ideas
不会有人想听一个以前刻薄但是依然美丽的人
from a still-gorgeous former mean girl.
说什么生活教训晚餐计划的
Former mean girl?
就是以前刻薄吗
You just burned Corynn McWatters!
你刚吐槽了科琳·麦克沃特斯
Now you try.
现在你试试
Hey, Corynn,
科琳
your quick-and-easy dinner ideas
你说的什么简易晚餐计划
are neither quick nor easy.
既不简单也不容易
I tried to make one last night,
昨晚我试过了
and it took me forever and it tasted like crap.
简直费足了时间而且做出来就跟狗屎一样
That's more of a burn on you, but really good try! Yeah!
你其实是吐槽了自己不过精神可嘉
I did it. I handled Corynn McWatters.
我成功了我搞定了科琳·麦克沃特斯
And now there was something Henry needed to do.
现在轮到亨利做点什么了