再造淑女（2014）

Selfie S01E02

Part 1 Oct. 24, 2020, 9:45 p.m.

Social media can be confusing if you're super old and dumb.
对于又老又无聊的人社交媒体很难懂
Why did you just favorite that tweet? She called you ugly.
这条为什么要点赞她说你丑
Because she's a hater.
因为她黑我
I love my haters. They make me famous.
我爱黑我的人黑黑能更红
You're not famous.
你可不红
I am in the twitterverse.
推特世界里我就很红
I see.
明白了
And your favorite thing is when people insult your looks?
对你来说最赞的事就是别人贬低你的外貌
Well, it's not my favorite thing.
并不是我认为最赞的事
Yet, you're favorited it.
那你还点赞
Favoriting an insult is a way of showing it doesn't hurt you.
别人黑你你还点赞说明它伤不到你
But it should hurt you.
但应该伤到你的呀
And maybe if I was still ugly, it would.
如果我还是奇丑无比的话也许会
Having haters online means that you made it.
网上有人黑证明你成功了
Okay, but having haters in real life
好吧但现实生活中有人黑
means that people hate you.
说明人们真的恨你
I'm sorry, but did you see what she was wearing?
不好意思你们看到她穿的啥了吗
I have cotton briefs that cover more.
我的棉内♥裤♥都遮得比她多
I can't believe H.R. hasn't cited her for inappropriate office attire.
不敢相信人力竟然没说她着装不宜办公
Please -- she's probably slept with everyone in H.R.
拜托她估计跟人力资源部的人都睡了个遍
How do you think she got to be the number-one sales rep?
不然你以为她怎么当上最佳销♥售♥代表的
You're killing me!
笑死我了
Can't be that funny.
有那么搞笑吗
It's like, "Hey, there, sweet potato. I'm on to you.
它说嘿小地瓜我盯上你了
"You're not a french fry,
你又不是薯条
stop showing up with my burger."
别总跟我的汉堡一起出现
You're hilarious. You should be President.
你太搞笑了你应该当总统
Eliza, may I speak with you for a moment in my office?
伊莉莎能到我办公室来谈谈吗
Charlie, hold my calls. Uh, no one called.
查理有电♥话♥别转给我没人打电♥话♥
Good. Let's keep it that way.
很好就保持这样的状态
I can't control who calls the office.
我无法控制谁会打来电♥话♥
Charlie, I beg.
查理我求你了
Okay.
好吧
Okay.
好吧
What do you think you were doing out there with that guy from Business Affairs?
你在那跟商♥务♥部♥的家伙干啥呢
What --
你...
Guys like it when you laugh at their jokes
男人讲笑话的时候喜欢你给他捧场
and make them feel powerful.
也喜欢你让他们觉得自己很强大
President -- like that guy could be President.
总统就凭他还当总统
You're right. Oh, God, you're so smart.
你说得对天呐你真聪明
You know, you should be on the Supreme Court.
你应该去最高法♥院♥
Well, I do consider myself fair and impart--
我的确觉得自己公正秉直...
That is not gonna work on me.
这招对我没用
And while we're at it, do you think that these tight tights
既然说到这了你觉得这些紧紧裤
and those short shorts and those high high heels
吊吊带和高跟跟
are appropriate office attire?
穿着办公合适吗
You sound like Joan and the Fuggalos.
你这口气就像是琼恩和小丑乐队的伪粉
Eliza, this isn't the twitterverse.
伊莉莎这里不是推特的世界
You have to think about how you are perceived in this office.
你必须想想办公室里别人对你的看法
No, I have to think about how I'm perceived outside this office,
不对我应该想想办公室之外的人对我的看法
which is hot,
那就是火♥辣♥性感
which is what helps me sell drugs to repressed, old doctors,
这样有助于我卖♥♥药给那些压抑的老医生
which is how I got to be the number-one sales rep.
所以我才能成为最佳销♥售♥代表
Well, people are gonna get the wrong impression.
这样人们会有误会的
When you dress like this and you act like this...
你穿成这样又这样搔首弄姿
...people are gonna assume
人们会认为
that you're sleeping with President Sweet Potato.
你跟地瓜总统有一腿
I am sleeping with him.
确实有一腿啊
I sleep with him all the time.
我一直都跟他上♥床♥
Since when?
什么时候开始的
Let me check.
我查查
Oh, here.
找到了
First text from Freddy --
弗雷迪的第一条短♥信♥
"You are hotter than the bottom of my laptop" --
你比我的笔记本电脑底座还火热
2 1/2 weeks ago.
两周半之前
2 -- 2 1/2 weeks ago, and you're already intimate?
两周半你们就开始亲热了
"Intimate"?
亲热
Is that how old people say "Sex"?
老年人这么说"上♥床♥"吗
No. Yes.
才不是的
Eliza, this is your second office relationship
伊莉莎我才认识你几天
in the short time that I've known you.
这就已经是你的第二段办公室恋情了
And I use the word "relationship" very loosely.
我说的还不是严格意义上的"恋情"
Okay, don't get all slut-shamey on me
不要因为你不懂我们这代人
just 'cause you don't get my generation.
就想要说我风♥骚♥可耻
It just so happens we're a lot more cas about sex
我们对于性要比你们婴儿潮时期出生的人
than you baby boomers.
随意多了
I'm not a -- I'm not a baby boomer.
我才不是婴儿潮时期出生的
Yes, you are.
你就是
I fall squarely within the parameters of Generation "X,"
我妥妥的属于X一代
thank you very much.
非常感谢
But, Henry, this is one area
可是亨利在这一点上
where I'm not sure you should be advising me --
我不确定你可以给我建议
you're not even on Facebook.
连脸书都不上
Hey, I'd rather be out of touch
我宁愿落伍
than touching everything that walks.
也不愿意见着活人就去摸
See?
看到没
It hurts when girls don't laugh at your jokes.
你说笑话女生不笑的话挺难受的
Eliza, you -- you asked me to help you cultivate meaningful relationships.
伊莉莎你让我帮你建立良好的人际关系
Is that what you think you're doing with Freddy?
你跟弗雷迪之间是这样吗
Could be.
有可能哦
Do you two ever make advance plans?
你们会一起计划未来吗
Kind of.
算有吧
Have you and Freddy ever been on an actual date?
你跟弗雷迪真正约会过吗
Basically.
基本上有吧
Come on, Eliza.
拜托伊莉莎
Have you and Freddy even been outside together?
你跟弗雷迪一起出去过吗
For the most part.
大部分时间是的
Does his wraparound terrace count?
他家露天阳台算吗
I hate to break it to you, but I'm gonna.
我不想告诉你真♥相♥ 但我还是要说
You are what Jamie Foxx and other men of my generation
你就是杰米·福克斯和我们这一代人
refer to as a booty call.
所称的"炮♥友♥"
And if your behavior persists,
如果你继续这样下去
that is all you will ever be.
那你就永远如此了
Whatevs.
管他呢
If I wanted more, there could totally be more.
如果我想要更多我完全可以更进一步
But the truth is, I wasn't so sure,
可事实是我并不确定
so I decided to feel Freddy out
所以我决定在弗雷迪跟我"深入沟通"后
after he was done feeling me up.
跟他进行深入沟通
Welcome.
不客气
Hey, uh, what do you think of our relation thingy?
你觉得我们之间的关系如何
I think it's awesome.
棒极了
How many favorites my "Sweet potato" tweet got?
我的"地瓜"推特收到了几个赞
Six.
六个
But seriously, would you ever want to, like,
说真的你有没有想过
go outside... with me?
我们一起去外面
Hmm. Never really thought about it.
还真没想过
Guess I, uh, kind of like what we have inside.
我还是喜欢咱们在室内的活动吧
Want to take an after-sex pic?
要不要来个事后自♥拍♥
Sure.
好
Eardrops.
滴耳剂
Hear-drops. No more teardrops with eardrops.
滴耳不滴泪
Don't fear drops.
恐惧无所谓
The ear pops. The pain stops.
双耳不再累疼痛随风飞
Sir?
先生
Uh, my parents are in town.
我爸妈来了
Charlie, it's back to square one now.
查理你害我又回到起点了
I don't hear my voice -- I only hear your voice.
我听不到自己的声音满脑子都是你的声音
Should we just these "My parents are in town" drops?
这玩意能叫"我爸妈来了"滴液吗
Does that sound like a good name?
这名字听起来很好吗
Just kidding. You can go now.
开玩笑的你去吧