再造淑女（2014）

Selfie S01E04

Part 3 Oct. 24, 2020, 9:46 p.m.

Now, I don't mean no disrespect,
我无意冒犯
but I did not come here to talk smack with you thirsty ratchets.
但我不是来这里跟你们这群饥渴的小婊砸八卦的
I came here for one reason and one reason only.
我来这里的原因只有一个
Charmonique? Mitchell.
夏莫妮卡米切尔
Hi, Mitchell.
你好米切尔
Jeanette, Chantaal, please break the hell out.
珍妮特夏特尔拜托你们俩麻溜滚粗
I was afraid I'd never see you again.
我还担心永远见不到你了
I would never let that happen. You have to know that
我绝不会让这种事发生的你要知道
I've waited a long time for this opportunity, Charmonique.
我等这一刻等了很久了夏莫妮卡
Me, too.
我也是
When I heard that you were a mother,
当我听说你当了妈妈
well, there were no words to describe the way I felt.
我的感觉根本无法用言语来表达
But when I found out you weren't married
但是当我又发现你没有结婚
or even with the father...
甚至孩子身边没有父亲时...
Mitchell, no, no. Wait.
米切尔不要说等等
Let's not do this here.
我们不要在这里谈这个
Let's get rid of our coats and find a quiet place to talk.
我们脱掉衣服找个安静的地方好好聊聊
Wonderful. That's a great idea. Okay.
好好主意好
Looks like you, sir boysenberry,
博伊森莓先生看来你
shall reign until the first of the month.
要统治到月初了
Whereas your days, lord key lime of custard, are numbered.
而你青柠奶油大人时日无多了
You, there!
还有你
You sneaky greek bastard.
你个卑鄙的小混♥蛋♥
Expired.
过期了
You'll hang for your crime!
敢犯如此大罪判你绞刑
I have to get out of the house.
不能再宅下去了呀
Popo shut us down?
警♥察♥来抓我们了吗[Ke$ha歌♥词]
Eliza, you cannot have a child at --
伊莉莎你不能带小孩子...
This isn't a wild party.
这里没有疯狂派对
Nope! But it 'grammed like one, right?
是啊但是看上去很像有对吧
It really did. You two really appeared to be having a blast.
真的很像你们俩好像在疯玩一样
Oh, we were... until you got here.
确实是啊直到你来了
Okay, deejay pre-k.
好吧 DJ小朋友
But it's almost midnight,
但现在都快午夜了
and I'm guessing it's way past your bedtime.
你早就该上♥床♥睡觉了吧
This one goes out to my man.
这首歌♥送给这哥们儿
I get it.
我明白
You think 'cause I'm Korean I automatically like K-pop.
你以为我是韩国人就肯定喜欢韩国流行乐对吧
I certainly don't mean to lecture you.
我不是有意对你说教
But when you engage in immoral sex,
但是如果你跟人发生不道德的性行为
it's not just an oops upside your head.
这不仅会迷失你的思想
It's also an oops upside the head of
更会迷失我们的造物主
our lord and creator, Christ Almighty.
全能基♥督♥的思想
Oh, Mitchell, come on.
米切尔拜托
You were on tour with Jodeci.
你可跟Jodeci乐队一起巡演过
Which is why I had to repent --
所以我才要忏悔
specifically for providing the leatherwear
尤其是我在他们的《恶作剧》视频中
in their "Freek'n you" video.
提供了他们穿的皮草
When I think about all the fornication I fostered...
我一想到自己以前助长了那么多次通奸...
I can't believe I flat-ironed my MJB for this.
真不敢相信我为了这个还把这假发给烫直了
Excuse me, Mitchell. I have to check in on my son.
不好意思米切尔我得去看看我儿子了
While you're at it,
你去的时候
could you also check in on the son of God?
能顺便看看上帝之子吗
He's been waiting to hear from you.
他一直在等你的消息呢
I've never put a child to bed before.
我从没哄孩子睡过觉
I'm sure it'll be fine.
你一定可以的
Good night, Kevin.
晚安凯文
And to you.
你也是
I'm going to turn the light off now.
我现在要关灯了
I understand.
我懂
You do what you got to do.
你该干什么就干什么吧
What was that?
什么声音
I'm not sure.
我也不知道
Is that him? I-is he choking?
是他吗他要被噎死了吗
I want my mom!
我要我妈妈
He wants his mom! What are we gonna do?!
他要找妈妈该怎么办啊
His mom's not here! Eeeliza!
他妈妈不在这里伊莉莎
We got to remain calm and be of comfort to Kevin.
我们得淡定给凯文提供安慰
The lights went out, and he's like a totally different person.
一关灯他就好像变了个人
Bedtime can be really stressful for kids.
睡觉对孩子来说是很有压力的
Let's try and soothe him, shall we? Yeah.
我们去安慰他好吗来
Kevin, is there something soothing
凯文睡觉前
that your mother does for you at bedtime?
你妈妈会做什么来安慰你吗
She fills my humidifier...
她会给加湿器添水...
Humidif-- ...
加湿...
puts on my air purifier,
打开空气净化器
turns off my closet light...
把衣柜里的灯都关掉...
You get the closet! Okay.
你负责关衣柜里的灯好
...turns on my bathroom light,
把厕所的灯帮我打开
finds my stuffed lion... Here!
找到我的毛绒狮子在这里
Okay, I got it! I got it!
好我找到了找到了
...gives him to me... Rawr!
把狮子给我嗷呜
...takes away one pillow, adds one extra blanket...
拿走一个枕头给我加条毯子...
Get the blanket! I got the blanket!
快去拿毯子我拿到毯子了
...sprays three pumps of lavender mist... Lavender!
喷三下薰衣草喷雾薰衣草
Yeah. ...cracks the window and closes the door.
好了关好窗户再闭上门
You get the door.
你去关门
All right.
好了
Then she sings "Ease on down the road" from "The Wiz."
然后她会给我唱《绿野仙踪》里的《轻松前行》
I never saw "The Wiz"!
我没看过《绿野仙踪》啊
There, there.
好了好了
Don't... make that noise.
不要再发出那种声音了
As I watched Henry pat Kevin's afro,
我看到亨利拍凯文的蓬蓬头时
I realized I wasn't going clubbing tonight.
就意识到今晚去不成俱乐部玩了
Come on, Kevin.
别哭了凯文
No super-cool deejays cry for their mommies!
那么炫酷的DJ怎么还哭着找妈妈呢
Hello.
喂
Eliza, is everything okay?
伊莉莎一切都好吧
Evrything's great. Uhoh, I hear Eddie Murphy.
很好啊我听到艾迪·墨菲的声音了
Kevin is just a little anxious. Maybe about going to bed.
凯文有点小焦虑可能是因为要睡觉了吧
Well, did you give him his bedtime nuggets?
你给他睡前吃鸡块了吗
His what? His bedtime nuggets.
什么睡前的鸡块啊
I told you -- he needs two or three of those
我说过了他睡前要吃两三块鸡块
before he can go to sleep.
才能好好睡觉
His bedtime nuggets, of course. I completely forgot.
他的睡前鸡块对啊我给忘了
Hey, Kevin, would you like some bedtime nuggets?
凯文你想来点睡前鸡块吗
You know what? I would.
好啊
Thanks, Charmonique.
谢谢夏莫妮卡
Somehow, you called at the exact right time
你打来的正是时候
and knew exactly what to do.
你也知道该怎么做
You're the best mom ever.
你真是史上最棒老妈
You know what? I am. Hmm.
当然这还用你说
Everything good? Everything's great.
一切都好吗很好啊
You know, I don't know if
我不知道
you were trying to make me feel bad about my life choices.
你是不是想让我后悔自己的人生选择
But I'm sorry, Father McMoney -- I don't.
但是很抱歉麦克麦尼神父我不后悔
And I'm glad that you found higher love.
我也很高兴你找到了更高境界的爱
But I have self-love, and that's real love.
但是我有自爱那才是真正的爱
So now if you'll excuse me,
我先失陪了
they're playing my jam.
到我喜欢的歌♥了
Sometimes, when the grind window closes,
有时烦恼的窗户关上时
the door to enlightenment opens.
觉悟的大门便打开了
Eliza?
伊莉莎
Yes, Kevin?
怎么了凯文
Did we get a like spike?
你反击成功了吗
We sure did, buddy. We sure did.
当然了亲爱的当然
You did?
真的吗
Absolutely not.
当然是假的
I actually lost followers
传上凯文的照片后
by posting those pics of Kevin.
其实我的粉丝减少了