杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S04E13
Part 1
Nov. 20, 2020, 12:30 p.m.
What in the hell is around your neck?
你这脖子挂的是什么鬼
This? It's a crystal charm, man.
这个 水晶吊坠啊
Yeah, the guys at work gave it to me.
同事给我的
Why? Technically, it's "Hazing,"
为什么 其实是个"羞耻牌"
but, uh, I secretly love it.
不过我倒挺喜欢的
That is the kind of crystal that should only rest
这种水晶只能挂在
between a set of old bosoms.
一对下垂的老胸间
Did that sound just come from your body?
这声音是从你体内发出来的吗
Whoa, how long you two been here?
你俩在那儿藏多久了
When was the last time you asked me that?
你上次这么问我是什么时候来着
Last Thursday.
上周四
So, at least Thursday.
那就至少是从周四藏起的
What kind of lazy... holes...
得是有多懒才... 什么毛病...
Don't you know what -ing day it is?
你都不知道今天是那天了吗
For crying out l...
哎呀呀我...
Glen, you should see a doctor.
格伦 你应该去看医生了
My name is Schmidt.
我叫施密特
I can't afford to miss work.
我可请不起假
I'm sorry, Glen, but I'm with Kai on this one.
抱歉 格伦 但这事我得站在凯这边
Thanks, Wilfred.
谢了 威尔弗雷德
You ain't good with names.
你还真是会记名字
Oh, honey, you're all turned around.
亲爱的 你真是糊涂了
No, you are. I think you are.
不 你才是 我觉得你是
Stop. I think you are. I'm gonna get you...
不要 我觉得你是 我要让你...
I've done some research. Oh, ooh, how about a head's up, man?
我做了些研究 非礼勿视好吗
Have I seen those glasses before?
这小眼镜我见过吗
I feel like I want to remember them.
好像没什么印象了
I got these in seventh grade, and I love them.
我七年级的时候配的 一直是我的爱
Stop asking questions.
不要问了
All right, check it.
好了 听听这个
So nerd Coach went to the library,
呆呆的教练去了图书馆
and some place that actually exists
还去了文献馆
called the Hall of Documents.
没想到真的有这地方
The Downtown Branch? Mmhmm.
市中心那座吗 没错
How's Kathleen's eye?
凯思琳的眼睛怎么样了
Oh, Kathleen's dead.
凯思琳过世了
What? Yeah.
什么 是的
So, check it out, guys, this is all research.
看吧 伙计们 所有研究成果都在这了
You two don't have to date in secret anymore at school.
你们在学校不用再藏着掖着了
Yeah, it's all here in the Lipinski v.
利平斯基诉普拉特县联合校区的
Platte County Unified School District.
案例都讲清楚了
Precedence for days!
大有先例哦
Wow. Wow, you did this for us. No.
你为我们做了这么多 才不是
I just want to pat it.
真想拍一拍
I just want to, like, frickin' pat it.
拍一拍 拍一拍
I want to nurse it.
我想给它当奶妈
Yeah, I want to provide it with milk.
没错 就是想给它喂奶
I used to be the hot teacher.
以前最性感的男老师可是我
Now you know how I felt when you turned up.
这下知道你刚来时我的感受了吧
A miserable path awaits you.
悲惨的将来等着你呢
So you want us to come out,
所以你想要我们公开
so that you can go back to hooking up
这样你又可以去勾搭
with all the hot teachers?
那些性感女老师了
Very much so.
正是如此
But I'm thinking about you guys, too.
但我也还是想着你们的
I mean, wouldn't it be better
我是说 你们不用再藏着掖着了
if you didn't have to hide your relationship?
岂不是锦上添花吗
Yeah, you know what?
是啊 说真的
I think we should do this.
我觉得我们应该公开
I... we should do this, let's stop hiding.
我... 我们应该公开 不用再瞒着了
Yeah.
是啊
But, Jess, will this make things tricky for your work
可是 杰茜 这样高调公开的话
and will it in turn make you distracted and preoccupied
会不会影响你工作 让你时不时心不在焉
during our splishy-splashy?
各种走神
No, no, of course not. I won't let it.
不 当然不会 我不会让这影响到工作的
Then let's do this.
那就公开吧
Yeah, let's.
好耶 公开
Yes! We are coming out!
好嘞 我们要公开了
Cracking. I'm chuffed.
好极了 我高兴屎了
Dude, I do not get you.
伙计 我真是听不懂你说话
I trust you, Miss Day.
我相信你 戴老师
Mostly because I do not want to read this.
主要是因为我不想看这堆东西
That's great!
非常好
I'm the easy one, dawg.
我很随和的 狗狗
Seriously, it's the teachers you need to worry about.
说真的 你要担心的是那些老师们
Especially you.
特别是你
You tend to care what people think about you.
你得要考虑大家对你的看法
That's like saying a penguin "Tends" to be cute.
你这就跟要企鹅会卖♥♥萌一样
It's all it does, bro.
我可就会卖♥♥萌哦 伙计
So, good luck
那到时候
when the teachers present their field trip proposals.
老师们展示他们的郊游方案时祝你好运了
If they catch a whiff of favoritism,
他们要是逮住你有一点点偏袒
they are going to tear you apart like...
她们就会把你撕碎 就像...
like a beautiful baguette, you know what I mean?
像一根美丽的法式长棍 你懂我的意思吗
When you-you're having dinner,
你正吃着晚饭
and you just suddenly say, "Hey, forget the bread knife.
突然说 别拿什么面包刀了
Let's just rip into this with our bare hands."
我们用手把它撕碎吧
Ah, I love that.
我喜欢这个比喻
Hey, what'd they say? What do you got?
医生怎么说 你得了什么病
You can tell me, I can take it.
说吧 我能接受得了
I-I don't know if I can take it if...
我不知道能不能接受你要是...
If you died, I'd be lost.
你要是死了 我会疯了的
J-Just tell me, I'll be there for you,
尽管告诉我吧 我会一直在你身边的
I'm big and strong.
我足够强大
Is it cancer? What's your problem?
是癌症吗 你什么毛病
Oh, Schmidty, you have cancer?
小施 你得了癌症
I can't watch you go
我不忍♥心看着你
through cancer, buddy, you're not strong enough.
经受癌症的摧残 兄弟 你远不够强大
What is wrong with you?!
你到底有什么毛病
Your friend keeps forgetting
你朋友又忘了
his ulcer medication.
他溃疡的药
Ulcer medication?
溃疡药
He's lying, please.
他骗你们的
Take him home, make sure he does nothing all day.
带他回去 确保他卧床休息
Look, I'm not doing nothing all day.
我才不要卧床休息
Can't take days off wor...
工作不能耽搁
My firm is wooing red potatoes, and I want that account.
我公♥司♥正培育红土豆呢 我要拿到那个单子
Don't listen to that aggressive male nurse.
别听这个战斗种族男护士的话
Wearing the same shoes as an old Russian woman.
穿的鞋都跟俄♥国♥老太一样
It's not an ulcer, he's ly...
我这不是溃疡 他在撒...
Yeah, that's your ulcer telling you to stop being a dick.
没错 你的溃疡叫你别犯浑了
Before we begin our presentations,
在我们开始今天的陈述之前
in the spirit of full disclosure and transparency,
秉承公开透明的精神
I have something to tell you.
我有些事情要告诉大家
Mr. Geauxinue and I are dating.
我和查金尼先生正在约会
No, n-n-n-no.
不 不不不
No, I just felt someone pass over my grave.
不 我感到有人从我的坟前走过
Right.
是啊
I don't see a ring.
没看到你戴戒指
This is a total joke.
这肯定是个玩笑
Oh, you're joking.
原来你是开玩笑的
There's none scenarios that this is possible.
剧本绝对不可能这么写
Ladies, I know you're upset,
女士们 我知道你们不高兴了
but you know what I do when I'm upset?
知道我要是不高兴会做什么吗
I hook up with me.
跟我勾搭起来
But I want to assure you
但我想向你们保证
that this will not affect my judgment as vice principal.
这并不会影响我作为副校长的判断力
Let's hear those field trip proposals!
来听听大家的郊游提议把
Where are we gonna take those kids, guys?!
该带孩子们去哪儿呢 伙计们
And you know what makes the water delicious?
知道怎样能让水变得好喝吗
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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