消消气（2000）

Why don't you go say hi?
你怎么不去打招呼
I can't talk to him in that bathing suit. It is pretty small.
他穿着那个我没法和他打招呼 确实够小的
How can he walk around in a bathing suit like that?
他怎么能穿着那种泳裤走来走去
I mean, he's at the beach, he can wear whatever he wants, right?
我是说 他这是在海滩啊 他想怎么穿就怎么穿 是吧
What's he doing? He's just kind of settling in.
他干什么呢 他慢慢坐下呢
Did you see the back of his bathing suit? How does he walk around like that?
你看到他泳裤的后边了吗 他怎么能穿成这样走来走去
Can we go? Let's just go.
我们能走吗 我们走吧
We just got here, we're not gonna go.
我们才刚来 我们才不走
That's ridiculous. Plus, if you get up, don't you think he'll see you then?
太荒谬了 而且 如果你起来 他不就看到你了吗?
I've got to stay like this now, for the rest of the day?
那我今天一天 就得保持这个姿势?
I guess that's up to you.
我觉得那就取决于你了
Kiss that therapist goodbye.
要和那咨♥询♥师说再见了
The only question now is, do I tell Richard Lewis?
问题只在于 我要告诉理查德路易斯吗?
Are you sure it was Dr. Weiss? It was him, it was him.
你确定那是韦斯医生吗? 那就是他 就是他
No question about it. It was Weiss, Dr. Weiss.
毋庸置疑 就是韦斯 韦斯医生
Thong, up his ass.
只穿一条丁字裤
Like Richard Simmons? Richard Simmons has a thong up his ass?
就像理查德西蒙斯吗? 理查德西蒙斯穿过丁字裤吗?
Did you ever see him do that shit? No.
你没见过他那么穿吗? -没有
Holy shit.
苍天啊
So, you know, I just wanted to tell you, you know, so l'm leaving...
哎 你懂 我只想和你说 你懂的 我不会再去...
You know what, this is so unfair of you.
知道吗 你这样简直太不公平了
I turn you on to this guy, he's a brilliant doctor.
我给你介绍的他 他是个很棒的医生
I would've never told you. You should be thanking me.
我就不该介绍给你 你应该谢谢我
Saving you from this hedonist giving you advice.
把你从这个享乐主义者手里解救出来
Hedonist, he's a hedonist?
享乐主义 他是个享乐主义者吗?
He's not a hedonist. What is he?
他不是个享乐主义者 他是什么?
This is my 28th therapist since 1969.
这是我 1969 年以来第 28 个咨♥询♥师
I don't want to go anymore, l don't want to break the record.
我不想再换人了 我不想再打破这个纪录了
The recap is very hard. Your recap is two, three months, isn't it?
重头再来会很难吧 你重头再来得花两三个月 是吗?
Two, three months? That's just the crib.
两三个月?那只是皮毛
I was born in Brooklyn, and I felt alienated...
我生在布鲁克林 还有我感觉被孤立
and I became an alcoholic. Okay, you don't have to do it right now.
后来我成为一个酒精成瘾者 好 你不用全都告诉我
How am I gonna tell him l'm gonna leave now?
我得怎么去和他说我要离开他了?
Is it like a woman? Can you do it on the phone?
和女人不一样吗?你不能在电♥话♥上说吗?
You're not canceling cable.
你又不是要退掉有线电视
You have to go in. He's a human being. You got to say...
你必须本人过去 他也是个人 你必须得说...
Let's go out to lunch, let's talk about this, 'cause we need a game plan.
我们去吃午餐吧 好好谈谈这事 我们需要个详细计划
There's no plan, you go in and quit. What are you gonna do?
要什么计划 你进去 说要走 你还能怎么做?
Can't we have lunch and discuss this? I can't.
我们不能吃个午餐 谈谈这个吗? 我不行
Why not? I've been auctioned off for some charity.
为什么不行? 我把时间慈善拍卖♥♥了
What is this, Roots? What you mean, "auctioned off?"
搞什么 《寻根》吗? 什么叫"拍卖♥♥了"
It's some celebrity auction.
是名人拍卖♥♥
Somebody paid $4,000 to go have lunch with me.
有个人花了4000美金来和我吃午餐
Do you believe that? You should be flattered.
你敢信吗? 你应该感到荣幸
He wants to have lunch with Larry David.
他想和拉里大卫共进午餐
I feel a lot of pressure to be entertaining, you know?
我觉得要风趣的压力很大 知道吗?
All right, enjoy your lunch.
好吧 享受午餐吧
Mr. David! Mr. David, over here.
大卫先生 大卫先生 这边
Hiya, John Tyler. John Tyler?
你好 约翰泰勒 约翰泰勒?
Like the president.
和总统名字一样
President Tyler.
泰勒总统
Yeah. Should I call you Mr. President?
对 我该叫你总统先生吗?
This is great. Thank you for donating your time...
这太棒了 谢谢你为了慈善捐出...
for the auction and everything.
自己的时间 还有你做的一切
"Tippecanoe and Tyler, too."
"提皮卡努还有他泰勒"
You know what "Tippecanoe" was? No.
你知到"提皮卡努"是什么吗 不知道
You don't know? If I was named after a president...
你不知道?如果我是以总统命名的...
l would know everything about him.
我会知道他的一切的
I wasn't named after him, it's just a family name.
我不是以他命名的 只是一个姓罢了
You never know. I'm related to King David. Really?
你又说不准 我还和大卫王有关系呢 真的吗?
Yes, so, a president and a king...
真的 看 一位总统一位王...
at the same table. Pretty big table.
在一个餐桌上 好一张餐桌啊
It's a family name, really. Big family?
真的 就是一个姓而已 大家族吗?
Yeah, five brothers and sisters, you know, lrish.
嗯 五个兄弟姊妹 你了解的 爱尔兰人
You ever catch your parents having sex?
你碰到过你父母上♥床♥吗?
No. Me either.
没有 我也没有
You know they did, but you wonder when.
你知道他们一定上♥床♥了 但你会好奇到底在什么时候呢
So where you from?
那你是哪来的?
Jersey, originally. Yeah?
老家泽西岛 是吗?
You ever see Joe Piscopo's Jersey Guy?
你看过乔皮斯柯波演的"泽西佬"吗?
"I'm Jersey guy.
"我是个泽西佬"
"I'm from Jersey, l'm the Jersey guy."
"我从泽西来 我是泽西佬"
Yeah, people from Jersey didn't really find that guy funny.
真正泽西来的人不觉得那家伙有意思
Ever play the salt and pepper shakers?
玩过胡椒和盐的罐子吗?
What song is this?
听这是什么歌♥
"Happy Birthday To You."
"祝你生日快乐"
Happy birthday
生日快乐
Happy birthday, Mr. President John Tyler
生日快乐 约翰泰勒 总统先生
Happy birthday
生日快乐
Anyway, everybody from Groat's Syndrome Association just...
总之 每个格罗特综合征团体里的人都...
Thank you for your time...
很感谢你肯花时间
and for donating the lunch. We really appreciate it.
感谢你能捐出午饭 我们真的很感激
Please, whatever you need, l'll donate anything you want.
没事的 无论你们需要什么 我什么都能捐
I'll donate it all. My time, my organs.
我都会捐了的 我的时间 我的器官
What do you want, you want a kidney? I'll give it to you.
你想要什么 想要个肾吗?我把肾给你
What else do you need?
你还要什么?
I've got a terrific penis. I could donate a penis.
我老二很不错 我可以捐根老二
I've got good spleen, excellent spleen.
我的脾也挺好 很不错的脾
Mr. Spleen gets rid of dirt and grime
脾脏先生 摆脱尘垢
And grease in just a minute
除污驱渍 不需多候
Mr. Spleen will clean your whole house
脾脏先生 全家清洁
And everything that's in it, Mr. Spleen
家中一切 脾脏先生
lf you change "Mr." to "Monsieur," say, "Monsieur Spleen"...
如果你把"先生"改成"先森" 就成了"脾脏先森"
then you'll think that the commercial was...
那你就会以为广♥告♥是...
Monsieur Clean, Monsieur Clean
清洁先森 清洁先森
lt's a devastating illness...
这是种很可怕的疾病
and we just appreciate everything you've done.
我们真的感激你做的一切
I've never heard of it. What is it called?
我从来没听说过 叫什么来着?
Groat's syndrome. And what does it do?
格罗特综合征 那症状是什么?
It's a nervous system syndrome...
是一种神经系统疾病...
that makes people extremely excited and nervous.
让人感觉极度激动紧张
My niece has it. Of course, Dick Groat.
我的侄女有这病 嗯 迪克格罗特
Named after Dick Groat...
以迪克格罗特命名...
who used to play shortstop for the Pittsburgh Pirates.
原来在匹兹堡海盗队打游击手的
I know, 'cause he was a bald guy. And he didn't feel very well...
我知道的 因为他也秃顶 而且他表现不太好...
'cause he was very excited all the time, is that it?
就因为他时刻都过于兴奋 是吧?
No, the doctor that initially diagnosed it was named Groat.
不是 首次确诊这个症状的医生叫格罗特
You sure it wasn't Dick Groat? Yeah, l'm pretty sure.
你确定不是因为迪克格罗特吗? 对 非常确定
Dr. Groat might be Dick Groat's father, for all we know.
格罗特医生可能是迪克格罗特的父亲 谁知道呢
No? No, my niece has it, and...
不是吗? 不是 我侄女有这病 而且...
You might want to check into that.
不如你仔细查查吧
So, he's wearing this skimpy kind of Speedo bathing suit...
他就穿一条布料很少的速比涛泳裤一样的...
his boys are hanging out all over the place.
他的小♥弟♥弟♥四处晃荡
I'm not going back there. No way, I can't, would you?
我是不会再回去了 不可能的 我不行的 你不会吗?
To the beach? No, to the therapist.
回沙滩吗? 不 回咨♥询♥师那
Yours will be ready in just a few minutes, sir.
您的几分钟就好 先生
Mind if I start? He said it'll just be a couple minutes.
介意我先吃吗? 他说我的几分钟就好了
So, you don't want me to start, is that it?
那 你是不想让我先吃 是吧?
It's a couple minutes. You don't mind, do you?
就几分钟了 你不在乎吧 在乎吗?
I just think it's kind of weird.
我只是觉得有点怪
I mean, if you had your food come first...
我是说 如果是你的菜先到了
l would say, go ahead and start, what do I care?
我会说 您开吃吧 我在乎这个干嘛?
I would wait for you to get yours. I wouldn't want you to wait.
我会等你的菜上了再吃 我不想让你等
I'd be uncomfortable if you waited.
如果你等了我会不舒服的
I'd feel it would be polite to wait for your food to arrive.
我觉得等你的菜上才是礼貌的做法
I think it's kind of impolite to prevent a person...
我举得不让别人吃饭就挺不礼貌...
who is hungry from eating.
尤其是人还饿着
Yeah, but we're supposed to be having lunch together.
嗯 但我们是应该共进午餐的啊
Do we have to start at the exact same time? I don't get that.
我们非得同时开吃才算吗?我不理解
I don't see why you can't wait two seconds for your cold sandwich. It's not even hot.
我不明白你的凉三明治怎么就不能等一会 本来就不是热菜