消消气（2000）

I really like it, it's a nice house. It's big, but I like it.
我真的挺喜欢的 是个不错的房♥子 它很大 但是我喜欢
All right, that's all I needed. The master bedroom?
好的 这么说就妥了 主卧呢?
I love the master bedroom, the downstairs, the fireplace.
主卧 楼下 壁炉 我都喜欢
Let me ask you something.
我问你点儿事
Did you notice that when I asked him about the sweater...
我刚才跟他聊那件毛衣时 你注意到了吗...
he said it was 100% cashmere?
他说那是100%山羊绒?
There's no way that sweater's 100% cashmere.
那不可能是100%山羊绒
It's, like, maybe 35, 40, 50 at the most, but 100?
可能就35% 或40% 最多50% 但他说100%?
That can't be... The sooner the better, l'm ready to...
那不可能... 越快越好 我准备...
Wait a second, do you trust this guy...
等一下 你相信那家伙吗...
'cause the guy's lying about a cashmere sweater.
因为他聊那件山羊绒毛衣时说谎了
You feel comfortable with that?
你心里舒服?
We're not buying a sweater, we're buying a house.
我们不是买♥♥毛衣 我们要买♥♥♥房♥♥子
Okay, listen, we have to talk about how much to offer.
好吧 听着 我们需要聊一聊出价
Absolutely.
当然
What kind of person lies...
什么样的人才会...
about a percentage of cashmere in his sweater?
对自己毛衣的山羊绒含量说谎?
You know, fake cashmere and all...
你知道的 假山羊绒什么的...
l do think it's a good idea for you to work with Jason.
我确实觉得让你和杰森共事的主意不错
You know, I love Jason.
你知道的 我爱杰森
I just don't want to go back and do TV.
我只是不想重操旧业
Come on, TV is a great medium. Too much work.
来吧 电视是很棒的媒体 干不完的活
Too much work? You have to work. It's a pain in the ass, I can't do it.
活儿多?你必须工作呀 那太烦人了 我做不了
No, you need to work.
不 你得去工作
I'm married, that's plenty of work.
我结婚了 这就很多事儿了
Okay, but you need to start writing.
好吧 但是你得开始创作了
Just, you know, I think for your own good, for your own sanity.
你知道的 是为你自己好 让你精神正常
Why, l'm not insane. You think l'm insane?
为什么 我没失常呀 你觉得我失常了?
Listen, Richard Lewis wants me to manage him.
听着 理查德刘易斯想来我这儿
Really. Yeah.
真的 对啊
But I need you to be honest with me.
但是我想听你说句老实话
Sure. No, really honest with me.
当然 不 真的老实说
Okay. Is he a highmaintenance guy?
好 他是个难伺候的人吗?
What, are you kidding? So, his act is pretty close to...
什么 你开玩笑呢? 他的举止很像那种...
Yeah, but so what?
是啊 但那又怎么样呢?
I'm gonna sign him, you like that.
我准备签下他了 你要是觉得可以
Good.
很好
I can't believe he didn't even mention that to me.
难以置信 他都没跟我提过这事儿
Hey, Tom!
嘿 汤姆!
How are you, man? Jeff, hi, good to see you.
挺好的吧 伙计? 杰夫 嗨 看见你真高兴
Good to see you, too.
我也很高兴见到你
Tom Clark, Larry David.
汤姆克拉克 拉里大卫
Larry David, nice to meet you.
拉里大卫 很高兴见到你
Nice to meet you. Tom, sit down, man.
我也是 汤姆 坐会儿 伙计
Tom sold me my Toyota Sequoia. Toyota of Hollywood?
我的丰田红杉是从汤姆那买♥♥的 好莱坞的丰田店?
Toyota of Hollywood, yeah. You're a car dealer?
对 好莱坞的丰田店 你是汽车经销商?
Dealer, yeah. Really?
对 经销商 真的?
But I like to sell, too. Do you?
但我也喜欢销♥售♥ 是吗?
Somebody special comes in, a bigwig...
常会有很特别的人来 有大人物...
He's a bigwig? Yeah, he manages.
他是个大人物? 对啊 他是经纪人
That's good, l'm managed by a bigwig.
那真棒 有个大人物来做我经纪人
What do you drive? I drive a Prius.
你开什么车? 丰田普锐斯
You're happy with the Prius?
你对普锐斯还挺满意的?
Very happy, and the Prius is extremely happy with me.
相当满意 普锐斯对我也非常满意的
Let me ask you a question.
我问你个问题
How does somebody become a car salesman?
怎样成为一名汽车销♥售♥员?
Do you have to have a lot of experience for that?
干这行需要很多经验吗?
It was in my blood, yeah.
我反正是天生就适合这行
I mean, it takes years to be a car salesman.
但成为一名汽车销♥售♥员的确得花几年时间
You know, I always felt l could be a great salesman.
你知道吗 我一直觉得自己可以成为一名优秀的销♥售♥员
You gotta have the gift.
你得有天赋
'Cause believe me, l could talk anybody into anything.
因为 相信我 我能劝服任何人做任何事
Except women into sex, that's one thing I can't do.
除了劝女人和我上♥床♥ 这事儿我做不了
Besides that, I know how to manipulate people, l'm very good at it.
除了这个 我知道如何操纵别人 我很擅长这个
Car salesmen are not bullshit. I mean... No, of course, they're not.
我想说...汽车销♥售♥员可不是唬人 对 当然 他们不是
We're an honest pack, between ourselves.
说实在的 其实我们是老实人
To be honest with you, l like to make money.
坦白地讲 我喜欢赚钱
But I love to sell cars, I really do.
但我也爱卖♥♥♥车♥ 真的
If I wanted to do that for one day...
如果我想当一天汽车销♥售♥员...
Sell cars. Yeah.
卖♥♥♥车♥ 对的
Just for a day.
就一天
I don't think so.
我不这么认为
I want to see if I can do it. I thought that I'd be great at it.
我想看看自己能不能干 我觉得自己会很擅长这行
You can't do it, you're a writer.
你做不了 你是个编剧
What do you do? Do you know who he is?
你是做什么工作? 你知道他是谁吗?
That's Larry David, he created Seinfeld.
这是拉里大卫 《宋飞正传》的主创
Okay.
好吧
Forget that, I just want to try it for a day. I think that would be great.
得了 我只是想试着做一天 我觉得那很棒啊
Come in and work for me.
到我这工作吧
Maybe l'll do it for two or three days. Who knows?
我可能会干个两三天 谁知道呢?
What're you doing? What are you talking about?
你这是干嘛?你在说些什么呢?
What do you mean two or three days? What do you care?
两三天是什么意思? 你关心个什么?
What do I care? What if l'm good at it? Excuse me.
我关心什么? 不好意思 如果我很擅长这行呢?
What if you're good at it? Yeah.
如果你很擅长那行? 对啊
You're not gonna sell a car the first day.
第一天你一辆车也卖♥♥不出去的
I guarantee you...
我向你保证...
l will sell more cars than anybody in your showroom.
我会比你展厅里的其他销♥售♥员卖♥♥的多
You won't sell a car the first day. Nobody does it the first day.
第一天你卖♥♥不出去的 没人能第一天就开张
You'll see, okay, fine. I'll tell you what. Come by...
好啊 行 你等着瞧吧 我跟你说啊 过来...
get some brochures, you know where we are.
拿些宣传册 你知道我们店的位置
I'll get the brochures, l'll study up...
我会去拿宣传册 钻研一下...
and l'll learn everything, don't worry about it.
我会学明白的 别担心
I'll have it down when I get there. Come by on Monday?
等我到那儿就都掌握了 周一过来?
I really appreciate this, it's like a fantasy that I have.
真是太感谢了 这就像是我所幻想的
This'll be great. Monday morning. You got it. Great.
那太棒了 周一早上见 没问题 太棒了
Thank you.
谢谢
I'm pretty excited.
我很兴奋啊
My gosh, that's wonderful. No, that is no problem.
天啊 很好啊 不 没有问题
Larry just walked in, I can't wait to tell him. Okay, bye.
拉里刚进来了 我等不及要告诉他了 好的 拜
You're not gonna believe this. We can move into the house on Monday.
你不会相信的 我们周一就能搬进去了
Really? Yeah, it's all done.
真的? 没错 都妥了
So fast?
这么快?
Yeah, it was a cash deal, there was no escrow.
对啊 现金交易 没有第三方
They've already moved their stuff out, we're ready.
房♥主已经把东西都搬出去了 我们也准备好了
So, make sure that you are clear on Monday...
所以呢 确保你周一没事儿...
which l'm sure is not going to be a problem for you.
我很确定这对你来说不是问题
I actually can't do it on Monday.
实际上我周一去不了
Why?
为什么?
I got a job. You did?
我找了份工作 真的?
That's good, did you call Jason?
那挺好的 你给杰森打电♥话♥了?
I'm selling cars.
我要去卖♥♥♥车♥
What?
什么?
I was having lunch today with a guy who owns a Toyota showroom.
我今天中午跟一人吃饭 他有个丰田展厅
He sold Jeff some cars and...
杰夫从他那买♥♥过车...
So, now you're going to be a car salesman?
所以说 你要当汽车销♥售♥员了?
Yeah, you know, he said I could try it.
是啊 你知道吗 他说我可以试一下
What is wrong with you? Why? What?
你没事儿吧? 为什么这么说?怎么了?
You've committed to this?
你确定要做这个了?
Yeah. It's only for, like, a couple of days.
对啊 只做几天
Or however long I want to do it. I just want to get it out of my system...
或者 我想做多久就做多久 我只想换个环境...
You can't do it on Monday.
不能周一去
I have to do it on Monday. I have to show up for my first day at work.
我必须周一去 第一天上班我得过去
What, am I supposed to call in sick?
怎么样 我应该打电♥话♥请病假?
That's not gonna fly.
不是个好主意
Prius? That's ours, that's easy.
普锐斯?咱家就是这车 很容易啊
"Can I help you?"
"需要帮助吗?"
What do you think?
你怎么看?
"Excuse me, sir, perhaps the Land Cruiser would interest you.
"打扰了 先生 您可能会对兰德酷路泽系列感兴趣
"And we have, Corolla, Canola...
"我们有卡罗拉 坎诺拉...
"and Rave." ls it Rav?
"还有Rave"这是Rav吗?