少男奶爸（2012）

Baby Daddy S04E11

Part 1 Nov. 30, 2020, 2:28 p.m.

And that's how you get a little girl to stop crying.
这就是你怎么让一个小女孩破涕为笑
You know, I'm more concerned
知道吗我更关心的是
with how to get a big boy to stop dancing.
怎么让一个大男孩别再跳舞了
Seriously, dad, it is so not a big deal.
真的老爸没关系
I'm totally cool.
我没事的
Yeah, yeah, I'll talk to you later. All right.
行回头再聊就这样
Oh my god, my life is over.
天哪我的人生彻底完了
Oh my god, you're overreacting.
天哪你太小题大做了
Sometimes, when you see what it looks like,
真的如果你能看到自己的样子
it will make you stop.
就不会再这样了
My dad canceled our trip to Tahiti.
老爸取消了我们去大溪地的度假
Now I've got a week off with no prospects,
现在我有整整一周无事可干
nowhere to go, and no money.
无处可去还没钱可花
God, when did I turn into Ben?
天哪我什么时候变成本了
Hey, I have some personal days.
知道吗我有假期
Maybe we could staycation together.
不如我们在附近找地方一起度假吧
Oh, that would be so much fun.
一定会很有乐趣的
Yeah, sure, if you're you getting to hang out with me.
当然了你能跟我这样的人一起混
But what about my fun?
我又有什么乐趣
My life is about to change forever.
我的人生即将彻底改变
Well, you're tall and have big hands,
你人高马大手也大
so the transition shouldn't be too hard.
这对你来说应该不是什么难事
You're gonna regret that later.
你会后悔说这句话的
Mr. Jon Bon Jovi
乔恩·邦·乔维先生
is selling his new york penthouse,
要出♥售♥他在纽约的顶层豪华公♥寓♥
and he is looking for a realtor,
他正在找地♥产♥中介
and I think his search is over.
如今他可以不用再找了
Hi, Jon. I'm Bonnie Wheeler.
你好乔恩我是邦妮·维勒
To sell a property as special as yours,
要想卖♥♥出像你的公♥寓♥这么特别的地♥产♥
you could go with a realtor with decades of experience,
你可以选择一个拥有多年经验的地♥产♥中介
or you could go with...
也可以选择
me, the ultimate fan,
我你的铁杆粉丝
who conceived not one, but two kids
有着不光一个而是两个
to Shot Through the Heart.
给我"锥心之痛"的小子
Jon, I know I may be Living on a Prayer,
乔恩我知道或许我只是"活在祈祷中"
but I promise I will sell your place,
但我保证一定会卖♥♥出你的房♥子
Dead or Alive.
"无论死活"
Bonnie Wheeler. I give real estate a bad name.
邦妮·维勒我就是地♥产♥界的"坏小子"
Mom...
老妈
I thought dad burned down the Bon Jovi shrine.
我以为老爸不是烧了你的邦乔维圣坛吗
He did.
他是烧了
I rebuilt it.
我又重新建了一个
**It's amazing how the unexpected*
*人生妙无边惊喜无极限
**can take your life and change directions*
*劝君莫等闲雌雄随我愿
Now is that convince you to go to the concert with me?
这样能让你跟我一起去演唱会了吗
No...
恐怕不行
and I probably shouldn't go anywhere for about 15 minutes.
而且我这十五分钟内最好哪都别去
Fine, but if you don't hear from me by Saturday,
行但如果周六你还没我的消息
you'll know I got on their tour bus.
就知道我混上他们的巡演大巴走了
Just take a friend.
带个朋友去吧
One who doesn't do this.
一个不会这么做的朋友
Hey, can I get you guys anything?
你们需要点什么吗
You know, like, a beer, or perhaps some birth control?
比如啤酒或者说套套
Maybe you can help me
或许你可以帮我
convince your brother how amazing Rubber Fox is.
说服你哥哥橡皮狐乐队有多棒
Rubber Fox? I love them.
橡皮狐我超爱他们的
Wait, are you going to their show tonight?
等等你是要去他们今晚的演出吗
They've been sold out for weeks.
我听说门票好几周前就卖♥♥光了
You wanna come? Hell yeah.
你想去吗当然了
Hell no. What's wrong?
当然不行为什么不行
You just told me to take a friend.
你刚才不是说让我叫朋友一起去吗
Yeah, friend,
是啊朋友
as long as they're female, or gay, or both.
前提是女的或者同性恋或者两者都是
Besides, Ben's working.
再说了本要上班
Hey, Carter, you clock me out later,
卡特如果你今天晚点帮我打下班的卡
and I'll clock you in early tomorrow?
我明天早点帮你打上班的卡怎么样
Sure. Yes!
行啊太棒了
And I'm officially not working.
这下我就不用工作了
Okay, I just gotta get home, wash up,
好了现在我得回家梳洗一番
and put some new strings on my air guitar.
再顺便练练我的摇滚造型
I'll meet you at the Garden.
晚点麦迪逊花♥园♥见
And I'm gonna go home and change,
我也回家换身衣服
and then pick Ben up at the Garden,
然后去麦迪逊花♥园♥接本
because the concert's not there.
因为演唱会不在那儿
Just so you know, that's not gonna end well.
跟你说这不会有什么好结果的
So, Tuck, I see you decided to
塔克看来你还是决定
take a little staycation after all,
在附近找地方度假了
one that you just didn't invite me to join.
只是你没有邀请我
Riley, I thought we went over this.
莱丽我以为我们都说清楚了
My vacation is six days, seven nights, and zero Rileys.
我的假期是六天七晚但不包括任何莱丽
Now, if you'll excuse me,
现在恕我失陪
I need to go wash off this suntan lotion.
我得去把这身美黑乳液给洗了
I don't know why you people love it so much.
真不知道你们为什么喜欢这玩意
Officially the best day ever!
今天简直不能再棒了
My video resume worked,
我的视频简历起作用了
and I am one of two finalists
现在我是出♥售♥邦乔维豪华公♥寓♥的
to sell Bon Jovi's penthouse.
最后两名竞争者之一
We are talking pools, tennis court,
那房♥子有好几个游泳池网球场
and a commission check that will help me follow my dreams.
还能给我提供一份大大的佣金让我追逐梦想
What dreams? To get the hell out of real estate.
什么梦想不用再干地♥产♥中介
Did you say pool?
你刚才说了游泳池吗
No, I said, "Pools,"
不我说的是"好几个游泳池"
as in, "I'm so rich, I built a second pool,
因为"我太有钱所以又建了一个游泳池
"because I forgot I already had one."
因为我不记得我已经有一个了"
So the place is vacant? Yeah, yeah.
这地方现在没人住是啊
I just need to find a rich guy with deep pockets.
我只要能找到个有钱的男人就好
Oh man.
天哪
If I had a dollar for every time I said that,
如果我每次说这话都能有一块钱
I could afford that place myself.
这会我自己都买♥♥得起了
What about a rich woman?
有钱的女人行吗
Like my boss, Mary Hart.
比如说我老板玛丽·哈特
Yeah, if you show me the apartment,
如果你带我去看看这公♥寓♥
I'll talk it up to Mary.
我或许能问问玛丽
You would do that for me?
你愿意为我这么做吗
Oh my god, Tucker. Thank you!
天哪塔克太谢谢你了
I'm sorry, what? Boob canyon!
抱歉你说什么乳♥沟♥憋死我了
You're welcome.
不客气
I will see you first thing tomorrow.
我明天一早就来找你
Don't think I don't know what you're up to.
别以为我不知道你想干什么
"Does it have a pool? Is it vacant?"
"那有游泳池吗没人住吗"
You're about as transparent as my attempt to go with you.
你的心思就跟我也想去的念头一样昭然若揭
Seriously, can I please go?
说真的能带上我吗
I don't know what you're talking about, Riley.
我不知道你在说什么莱丽
Hi, can I speak to someone about tennis lessons?
你好你们这能报名网球课吗
Dude! Oh my god, you just scared me.
老哥你吓死我了
Do you have any idea what time it is?
你知道现在几点了吗
Oh, I'm sorry. Was Emma a problem?
抱歉艾玛吵得你睡不好了吗
No, Emma was not a problem.
不不是艾玛的事
It's 12:45 in the morning, that's the problem.
问题是零点过三刻你才回来
Care to explain yourself?
你都干什么去了
Uh, not really, dad.
不告诉你老爹
The concert ended at 11:00, we got something to eat,
音乐会11点结束我们吃了点东西
and I dropped her off at her place.
然后我送她回家了
Her place? I knew it.
回她家我就知道
We're just friends. Calm down.
我们只是朋友而已别紧张
Ben, you are physically
本你先天缺乏
incapable of just being friends with a girl.
和女生成为普通朋友的功能
You seriously don't trust me to be alone with your girlfriend?
你真的不相信我和你女友独处吗
Are you seriously asking me if I'm serious?
你真的在问我是不是说真的吗
Well, you're gonna be seriously bummed,
那你可就要真的难过了