第五大道

Avenue 5 S01E09

Part 4 March 19, 2020, 9:27 a.m.

没错就是这样我并不聪明
Well, exactly. I'm not clever,
但我长得像是很聪明马特
but I look as if I should be. Matt!
可能我应该把胡子刮掉
Maybe I should shave this off.
有胡子给了我有智慧的错觉
It's giving me delusions of wisdom.
其实你不能刮
Actually, you can't.
我们合同里明确要求你留胡子
Beardedness is stipulated in your contract.
马特
Matt!
瑞恩贾德
Ryan. Judd.
你♥他♥妈♥这么久都去干嘛了
What... the fuck have you been doing?
只是...
Just, uh...
狂吃零食尖叫发泄一下
you know, having snack attacks and shrieking.
你没听见...
Did you not hear...
你根本就没躲起来啊
I mean, you're not even hiding.
我们都在躲藏我在躲藏
Well, we're all hiding. I'm hiding.
-你也在躲藏 -确实是
- You're hiding. - You are.
你写了"空虚" 到底什么意思
Wh-- What the hell was "the void?"
-我肚子空了 -天啊
- My empty tummy. - Oh my god.
比起随便一个有大风扇的白色房♥间
That makes so much more sense than a random
这个说法要合理多了
white room with a big fan.
马特我们需要气闸密♥码♥
Okay, well, Matt, we need the airlock codes.
不行我在逐条列出我的想法第309条
No. I've been itemizing my thoughts. Thought 309:
"每年我们都错过自己的死前忌日
"Every year, we pass the pre-anniversary of our death
但我们对此毫无知觉于是从未收到过礼物"
but we don't even know it, so we don't get presents."
说真的马特我们现在就要密♥码♥
Seriously, Matt, we need-- we need the codes now, so--
第14条
Thought 14:
"章鱼真可怜
"Poor octopus...
它有八条手臂却没有一只手
eight arms, but no hands.
去你♥妈♥的♥ 上帝"
Fuck you, God."
这观点不错
Yeah, that is a good point.
快说密♥码♥ 马特我们要密♥码♥
The codes! Matt, we need the codes.
-把密♥码♥给我 -老天啊
- Give me-- Give me the codes. - Oh, jeez.
你放哪了你干什么
Where-- Where are they? What are you doing?
你干什么不你站直了我来...
What are you doing-- No, you stand upright, and I'll--
不不不你站...
No, no, no. You stay--
快说清楚这是怎么回事
All right, full report. What is going on?
妈妈你真好
Mom, you're sweet.
天啊
Oh my god!
-拉芙 -拉芙
- Hi, Rav! - Rav!
我没那个心情瑞恩
Not now, Ryan.
别向我打招呼
Oh, don't "Hey, Rav" me.
-你得向我道歉 -为什么是因为...
- You need to apologize. - For what? About--
是因为地球上每个人都恨你吗
is this about the fact that everybody on Earth hates you?
我反对那样
'Cause I am against that.
就这么一句话可不够
I'm sorry, that's not good enough.
我不得不离开地球
I had to leave an entire planet behind
因为一群暴徒想用口水淹死我
because a baying mob wanted to bay me to death!
就因为你我在地球上的生活全毁了
My life on Earth is buggered because of you!
我想要的只是你承认这一事实
And all I'm asking is that you just acknowledge that
然后他妈的向我道歉
and fucking apologize!
你为我工作
You work for me.
我确实为你工作悔死我了
With deep bloody regret, I do!
爱瑞丝
Iris!
-感觉太爽了 -这是人身攻击
- That felt amazing! - That's assault.
对对这是人身攻击
Right! Right. Yes, that is assault.
爱瑞丝我刚才为什么没走开爱瑞丝
Iris! Why didn't I walk away? Iris!
这完全是暴♥力♥行为
That's real violence.
好谁要当下一个你吗
Right, who's next? You.
你最好把密♥码♥告诉她马特
You better give her the codes, Matt.
暴♥力♥永远不是解决之道
Violence is never the solution.
打他就打他吧
Just hit him. I think hit him.
我还没碰你呢
I haven't even touched you yet.
我告诉你密♥码♥ 0005
I'm telling you the number. Oh-oh-oh-five.
Five?
-赛勒斯 0005 -代表大道五号♥
- Cyrus? Zero-zero-zero-five... - For Avenue 5. I made it so that
这样任何理性思考的人都可以猜到
anyone thinking rationally would be able to guess it.
但不理智的人
But anyone thinking irrationally,
想自杀的人就想不到
anyone suicidal, would not.
我就没想到你是说我想自杀吗
Well, I didn't get it. Does that mean I'm suicidal?
你只要说是
Because honestly, just give me the nod,
-我立马就去... -永远别这么说
- and I'm ready to... - Don't say that. Ever.
贾德在哪
Uh, where's Judd?
他应该没走远
He can't-- He can't have gotten far.
他肯定朝补给船去了
He must be headed for the shuttle.
-你说什么 -糟了
- What did you say? - Oh, shittle.
米娅
Mia.
什么时候有补给船了
Since when is there a shuttle?
什么一直以来我对所有人这么友好
What? All this time, I've been unduly pleasant to everyone,
结果有办法离开
and there was a way to get off?
能慢点吗我最近膝盖不舒服
Can we ease up? I have recent knees.
快点大家加把劲
Come on, people, come on!
快点快点
Faster, faster!
时间不够了我要开始记名字
We run out of time, I'm gonna be taking names,
房♥间号♥ 还有拔牙齿了
room numbers, and teeth!
亲爱的人们并不喜欢
Honey, people do not respond well
口腔暴♥力♥威胁
to threats of dental violence!
反正你喜欢弗兰克
Well, you do, Frank.
出发出发出发
Go, go, go, go, starbuck!
好的先生
Yes, sir.
走啊走走走
Go! Go, go, go!
好的先生我们在走走走了
Yes, sir. We're going, going, going, going.
那个按钮启动了预发射
That button initiates prelaunch.
其他都是自动的
The rest is automated.
那他妈还要飞行员有什么用
What the fuck is the point of having a pilot?
还有第二个按钮
There is a second button.
我会在合适的时候按下去
I shall press that in due course.
-很好听上去很好玩 -我是保罗
- Oh, good. That sounds fun. - I'm Paul.
太好了我抓到他了
Oh, yes! I've bagged him!
这肯定就是猎人的感觉
This is what big game hunters must feel like.
我要是那个飞行员回程途中
If I was that pilot, I'd have my finger
肯定会一直把手放在弹射座椅按钮上
on the ejector seat button the whole way home.
你们知道我能听见你们说的每一个字吧
You guys realize I hear every word you're saying about me.
很伤人
It's very hurtful.
贾德先生
Well, Mr. Judd,
地球上的人都痛恨你
back on Earth, people really hate you.
如果你回去的话你会被大卸八块
So if you go back, you're gonna get ripped limb from limb,
然后每块再被卸成八块
and then bit of limb from bit of limb, so...
不我吗为什么
No! Me? Why?
按顺序回答仇恨对是你
In order, hatred, yes, you,
还因为你策划了大屠♥杀♥
and because you contemplated mass murder.
转念一想六个月算什么
On second thought, what's six months anyway?
还不到我在我妈子♥宫♥里待的时间
I was in my mom's womb longer than that.
认识你很高兴
It was great getting to know you.
很感谢你跟我分享你名字的故事
Thank you so much for sharing that story about your name.
他不想走了他不想走了
He doesn't wanna go, he doesn't wanna go.
-英雄归来 -好
- The hero returns. - Yeah!
比莉你的笑声有点吵再练练
Billie, your laugh. It's a bit loud. Work on that.
什么你要去哪
What? Where the hell are you going?
你耍了我
You tricked me!
这个悲哀的小丑
Okay, the sad clown
好像误会了我们的意图
seems to have misunderstood what we're trying to do here.
好了启动吧
All right, let's start this mother!
他是谁他为什么坐在贾德的座位上
Who the hell is he, and why is he in Judd's seat?
那是乔丹·哈特瓦
That is Jordan Hatwal,
换顺序读就是大傻♥逼♥
which is an anagram for Huge Asshole!
乔丹我喜欢过你但我非常非常怪
Jordan, I did like you, but I am very, very weird.
-没错她很怪 -飞行员去哪了
- That is true. She is. - Where's the pilot gone?
刚想起来我要去换一下旅行导尿管
Just remembered I've got to, uh, change the, uh, travel catheter.
见鬼了
Fuck me!
-去吧 -什么发生什么了
- Go on, go! - What? What's happening?
你要送我回地球
You're gonna drive me back to Earth?
小男孩终于长成男人了