第五大道

Avenue 5 S01E03

Part 4 March 19, 2020, 9:25 a.m.

这菜单真奇怪不过你说得对
That's a very odd menu, but sure, absolutely.
很好
Great.
心都醉了这酒太妙了
Tickle my ring piece, that is absolutely exquisite.
-什么情况 -你说什么
- What is that? - What's what?
喝一口香槟你就变成英国人了吗
Does drinking champagne turn you British?
什么意思你但你知道
What you mean? You-- But you know.
你不是知道吗
I mean, you knew, didn't you?
什么你是英国人
What? You are British?
你真的从英国来的吗
You're from actual Britland?
不是
No.
我搞混了抱歉
I get so confused. I'm sorry.
我就是抱歉真不好意思
I just get-- I'm sorry. I really am sorry.
你都道歉三次了你真是英国人
That's three sorries. You really are British.
我跟一群人假装自己是美国人
I'm pretending to be American to one lot of people.
我跟另一群人假装自己是船长
I'm pretending to be a captain to another lot of people.
-我假装在乎... -什么你说什么
- I'm pretending to care-- - What? Sorry, what?
该死我又说漏了是吧
Shit, I've done it again, haven't I?
说漏什么你在说什么我不太...
Done what-- what have you done? I don't really--
-没什么 -好吧
- Nothing. - Okay.
你刚才说假装是船长
You said pretending to be captain?
对
Yeah.
好吧那真船长在哪里
Okay, where is the real captain?
他在外面
He's... out there.
-比玛丽晚大概十分钟 -不不
- About ten minutes behind Mary. - No, no, no. No. No.
-对就是这样 -不这不可能
- I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Uh-uh. No. That's not happening.
-这一点都不好笑 -凯伦听我说
- Not funny. Not funny. - Karen. This is-- Listen.
你知道吗你该闭嘴了
You know what? You need to shut up!
好吧正在闭嘴
Okay. Shutting up.
不这也太你
Oh, no. This is so-- You--
我们都你就是个说谎的混♥蛋♥
We're-- And you're a lying D-head!
我是被雇来当形式船长的好吗
I was hired to be like a ceremonial captain. Okay?
这话什么意思那你是演员吗是吗
What? What does that mean? So you're an actor. Yeah?
好吧刚过去的十秒里
Oh, okay. Right, in the last ten seconds,
你已经换了大洲和职业
you just changed continents and careers.
不其实我的第一份工作是卖♥♥酒的
No, actually, my first career was in the wine trade.
好啊我们被困在太空中的铁罐里
So, we're just up here in this giant tin can
掌舵的还是个酒鬼
with a boozehound driving!
说句公道话大部分演员都是酒鬼
To be fair, most actors are boozehounds.
我的老天爷
Oh, big fat Buddha.
我要喘不过气来了
I am hyper-effing-ventilating here.
你要干什么
What are you doing now?
我得倒着因为我不想在骂完你之前
I need to invert because I do not wanna pass out
就昏过去你个吸丁的混♥蛋♥
before I finish yelling at you, you mother-effing C-sucker!
要是其他人知道了
When other people find out about this...
他们才不会丁丁听懂了
No, they're not going-- Oh, "cock." Got it.
他们不会知道的这就是重点
They're not going to find out. That's the whole point.
-这就是 -对好啊
- That's-- - Okay, yeah.
因为你的头会被钉在中庭
Because your head is gonna be on a spike in the Atrium.
你先安静一下行不行
Oh, wind your neck in, will you?
你觉得大家想看到谁管事
Look, who do you think people want to see in charge?
他们想看到船长还是葡萄酒商
They wanna see a captain or a vintner?
我觉得是船长你说呢
I think a captain, don't you?
重点是我们被困在这个带商标的假阳♥具♥里
The point is, we are trapped here on a branded dildo
在太空中飞驰满载惊慌失措的禽兽
hurtling through space, full of panicky animals
如果我不展现领导力的话
who are gonna start painting the wall with their turds
他们马上就要开始大粪涂墙互相啃脚了
and eating each other's feet unless I show leadership,
而我需要你来帮助我
and I need you to help me do that.
给我一杯
Give me one of those.
好而且这个客舱归我对吧
Okay. I also get this cabin, right?
客舱当然
The cab... Oh, absolutely.
其实我我本来打算
I was actually... I was gonna give you a...
把迷你酒吧的钥匙放在信封里给你的
an envelope with a mini bar key in it. I was...
顺便一提不是很迷你
which is by the way, not so mini.
贾德星系
-我受不了了 -你很享受吧拉芙
- I can't do this anymore. - Are you enjoying this, Rav?
两个字虫洞
Two words. Worm holes.
如果它们存在就可以被创造出来
If they exist, they can be created.
我怀念毛毛雨我怀念狗叫声
I miss drizzle. I miss dogs barking.
我怀念没有贾德名字的卫生纸
I miss toilet paper without a J on it.
我这个巨婴随时能换个干妈
Yeah, I can get myself adopted anytime!
我受不了了
I can't do this anymore!
我受不了了
I can't do this anymo...
好了船长
Okay, Captain.
首席乘客联络员上岗了
Chief Passenger Liaison Officer on duty.
你开始搞偷渡客了啊
So. Screwing the stowaway now, huh?
我没有什么
No, I am not. Not... What?
这是什么意思
What is that? I...
不是凯伦在协助乘客服务
No, Karen is helping with passenger services.
对 "凯伦"
Right. "Karen."
我打赌你现在肯定沾沾自喜
I bet you're feeling pretty pleased with yourself.
-没有 -你最好别
- No. - Well, you shouldn't.
-我没有 -因为我从没见那女人满意过
- I'm not. - 'Cause I've never seen that woman happy.
那不关我的事
Well, that has nothing to do with me.
我相信你床上猛♥男♥
Yeah, I believe you, Mr. Bad in Bed.
跟你聊几句很开心
Well, I really enjoyed this little talk,
但我要去舰桥了
but I'm off to the bridge now.
舰桥在震的时候别来敲门
when the bridge comes a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'.
我待会再见你和你的炮♥友♥
See you and the little fuckatee later.
赛勒斯
Hey, Cyrus.
我身着闪亮短裤的骑士有什么消息
My knight in shining shorts. What do you got?
你们会喜欢的有个小问题
You're gonna love this. Uh, slight snag.
我没有把飞船的额外重量考虑在内
I didn't factor in the ship's extra weight.
额外的五百个彩票中奖者
Those 500 extra lottery winners.
你要用数字搞我们了是吧
You're gonna number-fuck us, aren't you?
你没有考虑
You didn't factor...
意思是你没算进去就想问清楚
meaning you didn't count. Just to be clear.
是的实际上我的结果是再加六个月
Right. Yeah. So, my numbers are actually adding six months.
在你之前估计的六个月上
Six months more than the six months
再加六个月
that you estimate.
三年基础上再加六个月
Six months in addition to the three years.
你是说航行现在要三年半才能结束
you're saying the voyage is now gonna take three and a half years,
再问清楚一点
just so we're appallingly clear.
-是滴 -"是滴"
- Yep. - "Yep"?
你不能说"是滴" 现在可不是说"是滴"的时候
You can't say "yep." This isn't a time for "yep."
"是的" 表肯定
"Yes." Affirmative.
赛勒斯你就像是背着一大袋屎的圣诞老人
Cyrus, you're like Santa Claus with a sack full of shit.
你有什么可行的建议吗
Do you have any options that you can suggest?
有一个
Well, there's the one.
你知道我在说什么
You know what I'm talking about.
我知道你知道我在说什么
I know you know what I'm talking about.
不我不知道我又不是表情专家
No. I don't... I'm not fluent in facial expressions.
-你讲出来吧 -好好
- You should try words. - Okay, okay.
可以缩短航行时间
It could be shorter...
只要我们丢掉额外的五百人
if we lose those extra 500 people.
丢掉
Lose?
他们又不是一串钥匙你♥他♥妈♥的精神病
They're not a set of keys, you fucking psychopath.
船长洗衣服出了点问题
Oh, Captain, we have a laundry issue.
是吗
Oh, do we?
你肩上那么多道杠不该这么紧张
For a man with such epaulettes, you look remarkably rattled.
那么凯伦今天就该你履行职责了
Well, now, Karen. Today may be the day you justify your title.
新的航行时间出来了
We have a new journey time.
好的不我不喜欢
Okay. Oh, no. I don't like the way
你的嘴型很长时间吗
your mouth is shaping up. Is it a big number?
三个半
Three and a half.
不我♥操♥ 我♥操♥他妈的奶棍不
No. F me. F me with a... CB. No!
-年吗 -不是小时
- Years? - No, hours.
每次都要解释吗
Are we gonna do this every time?
-当然是三年半 -好吧
- Yes! Three and a half years! - Okay.
-你什么时候告诉他们 -我不告诉
- When are you gonna tell them? - I'm not.
这才是重点凯伦你去告诉他们
That's the point, Karen. You're gonna tell them.
你告诉他们还要安抚他们