家有正太（2014）

About a Boy S01E03

Part 3 April 8, 2021, 12:22 p.m.

But instead, you snubbed us
但是正好相反你拒绝了我们
and made Andy jump out of a moving car.
还强迫安迪从疾驶的车上跳下来
Made him?
强迫他
He opened the door and flew out!
他自己打开车门飞出去的
You know what? Just get out of my house, okay?
行了滚出我家去
Andy, help me out here, man.
安迪帮我说句话啊
The truth is, you're not godfather material.
事实上你不是当教父的料
What? It's really hard to raise a kid, Will.
什么抚养孩子是很艰难的
You have no idea.
你根本无法想象
You're clueless.
你对此一无所知
There's no time for anything else.
没有时间做其他任何事
We're so behind on Homeland,
《国土安全》我们一直没时间看
We don't even know if Abu Nazir is a bad guy.
我们都还不知道阿布·纳齐尔[剧中人物]是坏蛋
Abu Nazir is a terrorist!
他是个恐♥怖♥分♥子♥
It couldn't be any clearer!
地球人都知道
Have you never heard of spoiler alerts?
你不能先提醒一下再剧透吗
Honestly, this hurts. This hurts me, man.
说实话我很伤心兄弟
you have pain.
你还知道伤心呀
That's hilarious.
真好笑
Andy was so devastated
安迪昨天被你那样
by your shoddy treatment of him yesterday
假慈悲地狠狠一整
that he couldn't even get out of bed this morning.
他今天早上都下不了床
Oh, really? Is that why you couldn't get out of bed this morning?
是吗他是因为那个而下不了床的吗
Yeah. Really?
就是的真的吗
'Cause I thought it was because
我还以为是因为
he drank two bottles of Shiraz
他昨晚跟我的邻居菲欧娜
with my next-door neighbor Fiona last night!
喝了两瓶穗乐仙呢
What? What?
什么什么
I... Who the hell is Fiona?
我...菲欧娜是谁
The woman he spent the night with last night.
与他共度昨晚的女人
That's... Spent the night with, Andy?
那个...共度良宵啊安迪
Honey, we...I had a little bit of wine with her
亲爱的我们...我跟她喝了点酒
because he'd already gone out.
因为他放了我的鸽子
All we did was talk about the kids.
我们只聊了点孩子的事儿
That's all we did.
只是聊天而已
Is that all you did, handy Andy?
只是聊了个天吗巧手安迪
Aw, man.
不是吧老兄
Who the hell is handy Andy?
巧手安迪又是谁啊
Andy. I may have fixed her cabinet.
安迪我还帮她修了柜子
Thank you.
我谢谢你啊
Hey, man.
应该的老兄
You know, I really wanted to go out with you last night.
你知道吗昨晚我真的很想跟你去玩的
But you couldn't adjust your plans by an hour.
但你就连一小时都抽不出来
One hour.
就一个小时
It's not just about last night, Andy.
不仅仅是昨晚的事情安迪
You never have time for me anymore.
你再也没时间跟我玩了
I mean, we've watched the Super Bowl every year
从高中起我们每年都一起看
since high school,
超级碗比赛
and last year, I got tickets to the SuperBowl,
去年我都搞到了比赛门票
and you... and you bailed on me.
你却丢下了我
For my wife, who went into labor, man.
那天我老婆要生孩子拜托
Ah, she knew I got those tickets, man.
她肯定知道我有门票
I think she self-induced.
我觉得她自己催产的
Oh! That's disgusting.
好恶心啊
That's my life. All right?
照顾孩子就是这样好吗
And the fact that you consistently don't recognize that...
还有件事你一直不知道
It really bums me out that you haven't taken the time
你从来不花时间跟我的孩子相处
to bond with the kids.
这让我很难过
You don't even know their names.
你都不知道他们叫什么
I absolutely know their names.
我当然知道他们叫什么
Oh, really? Name them.
是吗那你叫啊
Listen, I'm gonna bond with them, okay?
听着我会跟他们好好相处的好吗
When they're fully functioning.
只要等他们完全长大了
When they don't need, like, a team to go poop.
不再需要排着队去便便了
I'm sorry, Will.
抱歉威尔
This is who they are now.
现在的他们就是这样
This is who I am now.
现在的我也只能这样
You may be my best friend,
你是我最好的哥们儿
but you have not been a good friend.
但不是个称职的哥们儿
Come on, guys.
我们走
Whoa, whoa, whoa, no spinning, okay?
不要瞎转好吗
Foosball is a precision sport.
桌式足球是一项精密的运动
It's a meticulous combination
它是足球和外科手术的
of soccer and surgery.
严密结合
Well, spinning is faster.
转起来快一点嘛
Oh, my God, you should see Andy play.
天哪你应该看看安迪是怎么玩的
He's like the world's most precise surgeon
他就像世界上最一丝不苟的外科医生
and Ronaldo rolled into one.
和罗纳尔多的结合体
He once did a bicycle kick.
他打过一记漂亮的倒挂金钩
A bicycle kick in foosball!
桌式足球里的倒挂金钩啊
I still don't know how he did it.
我到今天都不知道他怎么打出来的
I love hanging with you, Will,
我喜欢跟你一起玩威尔
but I can't handle your obsession with Andy.
但我受不了你一直说安迪
Andy is way out of line
安迪说我这个朋友不称职
saying that I'm not a good friend.
真是太过分了
I mean, he's just taking his frustration out on me
他自己不爽就拿我出气
because he's not free to do the things he wants to do,
因为他没有自♥由♥去做想做的事
and I am free to do them.
而我拥有那种自♥由♥
But don't blame me for your freedom,
但请别把你的不自♥由♥
which you don't have,
怪到我的头上
or for not bonding with your infants,
也别怪我不跟你的宝宝相处
who are arguably incapable of bonding.
他们根本就不具备与人相处的能力
Did you, like, think I became Andy halfway through that?
你刚刚说话时把我当成安迪了吗
Because that was really weird.
因为刚才真的好怪异
I'm leaving, Will.
我要走了威尔
No offense, it's just that
无意冒犯只想告诉你
until you work things out with Andy,
在你跟安迪的事情解决之前
I'd prefer to stay on my side of the dumbwaiter.
我还是想呆在升降机的另一边
Once again, I have something important and wonderful to tell you.
我又有重要的好事要告诉你们
You're not gonna be the Godfather, Will.
你当不了教父威尔
But if you wanna be Fredo,
但你要是想当弗莱多
I'll gladly put you in a rowboat and shoot you.
我很乐意送你上船再给你来一枪
I'm not here to be the Godfather, Laurie.
我不是来当教父的劳丽
I am here to be a friend.
我是来做个真正的朋友
I would like to babysit
你们俩出门的时候
the little people while you two go out
我愿意帮你们照顾这些小家伙
and spend some alone time for a few hours.
跟他们单独相处几小时
Just...or maybe a little less.
就几小时或者再短点
A little less would be ideal for me.
最好还是相处短点儿
Um, and maybe I'll even bond with, um,
或许我也会跟他们建立起感情
little Jonah and...
跟小乔纳还有
and the girl and...
那个小丫头还有
Maddie and Alex.
麦迪和亚历克斯
I'm gonna learn their names.
我会记住他们的名字
That...this is awesome.
那那太好了
This is amazing.
太棒了
Thank you so much, Will. See?
太感谢了威尔看到没
Um, are you insane?
你疯了吗
We are not leaving our babies alone with him.
我们才不能把孩子丢给他一个人照看
Can we talk about it?
我们能商量下吗
There's nothing to talk about.
没什么好商量的
I think there is something to talk about.
我觉得有必要商量下
Well, I think there isn't.
但我觉得没必要
Laurie, family meeting. Now.
劳丽家庭会议现在就开
I hate when you do that.
最讨厌开家庭会议了
Just let's go.
快去
We'll be right back.
我们马上就回来
Come on. Just don't...let's go.
快点别...走吧
Fridge monster!
冰箱怪物
Okay, it's back in the fridge.
好吧又跑回冰箱了