公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S06E21
Part 6
Feb. 20, 2024, 9:35 p.m.
说那是第一次他需要那么做
Said it was the first time he ever had to do that.
你的男孩上了律师资格考试的问题呢 你听说了吧
Ja boy's a question on the bar exam! Ya heard!
总之 Tom的小酒馆 今晚 到场
Anyway. Tom's Bistro, tonight. Be there.
别 就让我跟她... 嗯
Don't. Just let me talk... Mmm.
嗯 安置费看起来挺公平
Well, the relocation package seems fair.
但牙科计划就不止是公平了
But the dental plan is more than fair.
我是说 配偶每年三次洗牙吗 大赚了
I mean, three annual cleanings for the spouse? Ka-ching!
嘿 有人说"牙科计划"了吗
Hey, someone say "dental plan"?
怎么样啊
How's it going?
Jeremy Jamm议员 Jamm牙科诊所
Councilman Jeremy Jamm, Jamm Orthodontics.
嘿 我觉得我们都同意这场演唱会烂到爆 对吧
Hey, I think we can all agree this concert blows, right?
如果你们真想看人扎堆
If you guys really wanna see a crowd,
可能晚上路过来看下我的脱离集♥会♥吧
you might wanna stop by my secession rally later tonight.
肯定会很出人意料的
That is gonna be off the hook.
你们听说过Warrant乐队吧 - 是啊
You ever heard of Warrant? - Yeah.
有个翻唱乐队在这 自称叫做樱桃派
There's a cover band right here, that call themselves Cherry Pie.
挺肯定搞到了他们的贝斯手
Pretty sure we got their bass player.
哦 哇 - 会挺好的
Oh, wow. - Gonna be pretty good.
*摇啊滚啊 耶 毒药*
Rock and roll Yeah, poison
那是啥啊 - 就是一般摇滚啊 兄弟 会很好玩的
What is that? - Just general rock, man. It's gonna be fun.
*她是我的樱桃派 哦 耶 耶 耶*
She's my cherry pie Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
那家伙是议员啊 - 疯了 对吧
That guy was a councilman? - Crazy, right?
好吧 我们来聊员工
Okay, let's talk staff.
最初几个月 你只会有6名雇员
For the first few months, you're only gonna have six staffers.
四个会从奥马哈过来
Four of them will be coming up from Omaha.
哦 所以那意味着有两个空缺吗 - 是啊
Oh, so, does that mean that there's two openings left? - Yeah.
因为我碰巧认识一些最专注的人♥民♥公仆
Because I happen to know some of the most dedicated civil servants,
以及地球上生活过的最棒的人
and greatest people to ever walk the planet Earth.
你想雇谁就雇谁
You can hire whoever you like.
这就是我缓解离开带来情感打击的方式
This is how I will soften the emotional blow of me leaving,
我会带人和我一起走
I will bring people with me.
但只有两个 我带谁呢
But just two. Who do I bring?
哦 我知道了 我牺牲自己的位置换第三个人
Oh, I know, I'll sacrifice my spot for a third person.
不 那根本不会管用
No, that's not gonna work at all.
但你必须承认 那是个很高尚的主意
Well, you gotta admit, it was a very noble idea.
The Decemberists - The Crane Wife 3
我只能低垂下头 深深低垂下头
And I will hang my head, hang my head low
我只能低垂下头 深深低垂下头
And I will hang my head, hang my head low, low, low...
Ginuwine 能和你呼吸相同的空气是我的荣幸
Ginuwine, it is an honor to be breathing the same air as you.
没开玩笑
No joke.
但实话说 我们都是社交名流
But real talk, we're both men about town
经常被各种聚会邀请轰炸
being constantly bombarded with party invitations.
这家伙是谁啊
Who is this guy?
我的朋友 今晚他的餐厅开张
My friend who's opening a restaurant tonight,
而你要去那里 表弟
and you're going to be there, cousin.
除非你想让我上台
Unless you want me to get on stage
聊我们以前怎么一起洗澡的事情
and talk about how we used to take baths together.
每次我拿走你的橡皮小鸭子们你哭成什么样
How you cried whenever I took away your rubber duckies.
The Jackson 5 迈克尔杰克逊的家庭乐队
该死啊 Donna 你为啥要把嘎克逊五兄弟扯进来啊
Damn, Donna, why you gotta bring the Quackson Five into this?
你们怎么样啊
How y'all doing?
Lil' Sebastian 这首歌♥是给你的
Lil' Sebastian, this one is for you.
因为你是 我的 小马
Because you're. My. Pony.
Ginuwine - Pony
我只是个单身汉
I'm just a bachelor
我在寻觅一个搭档
I'm looking for a partner
一个知道怎么"骑"的人
Someone who knows how to ride
而不会摔下来
Without even falling off
Ron 我得问你点事
Ron, I have to ask you something,
而我想让你考虑一下 好吗
and I want you to consider it, okay?
真的考虑一下
Really consider it.
你觉得离开Pawnee搬去芝加哥如何
How would you feel about leaving Pawnee and moving to Chicago?
等等 别啊 我还没说完
Hold on. Come on, I'm not done.
你会为联邦政♥府♥工作
You'd be working for the federal government.
你知道吗 抱歉我想让我亲爱的朋友和伦理导师
You know what? Excuse me for wanting my dear friend and ethical mentor
陪伴我前往一趟终生的冒险
to accompany me on the adventure of a lifetime.
我挺高兴的 Leslie
It's very sweet, Leslie.
而且国家公园部可能是
And the National Parks Service is probably
唯一一个有点价值的政♥府♥部门了
the only branch of government worth a damn.
但Diane和我很乐意在这里养家
But Diane and I are quite happy raising our family here.
现在失陪一下
Now if you'll excuse me,
那边有个摊子提供一种叫做"油炸香肠被"的东西
there's a booth over there serving something called "fried sausage quilts,"
所以我要去把那个摊子买♥♥下来
so I'm going to buy the booth.
Freddy意面 嘿
Freddy Spaghetti, hey!
Andy Dwyer 或者Johnny Karate 我是你的超级粉丝啊
Andy Dwyer, or Johnny Karate, I'm such a huge fan!
省省吧 混♥蛋♥
Save it, jagwipe.
我曾经锁定了这个地方
I had this place on lockdown.
我的票子和寂寞妈妈都是滚滚地来
I was rolling in cash and lonely moms,
然后你突然冒出来 抢了我的位置
and then you come out of nowhere, and you blow up my spot.
你要完蛋了
You're going down.
嘿 孩子们 意面时间到
Hey, kids, spaghetti time!
好吧 回见
All right, see ya.
孩子们 掌声欢迎Johnny Karate
Clap your hands, kids, it's Johnny Karate!
你们好 我是Johnny Karate
Hello. I'm Johnny Karate.
*想象中的朋友很酷*
Imaginary friends are cool
*想象中的朋友能替你受苦*
Imaginary friends take the fall for you
爹地 你应该表演音乐啊
Daddy, you should play music.
是啊 Ron 来嘛 上去 好好玩一下
Yeah, Ron. Go on, get up there, have some fun.
我已经校准了射击照相馆里所有步♥枪♥的准心了
I recalibrated the sights on all the rifles in the shooting gallery.
我今天一天已经玩够了
I've had enough fun for one day.
哦 我知道那个眼神 她在哪
Oh, I know that look. Where is she?
她在附近 把孩子们藏起来
She's near. Hide the children.
你好啊 Ron 你好啊 Ron的朋友
Hello, Ron. Hello, Ron's friend.
Tammy
Tammy.
什么能把你带到一场儿童演出上来
What could possibly bring you to a children's performance?
找个新生儿准备当做祭品吗
Preparing a ritual sacrifice of a newborn?
不 只是来钓点爹地
No, just trolling for some daddy.
抱歉 我说错词了
Sorry, I pronounced that wrong.
来钓点爹"屌♥"
Trolling for some dad-D.
Diane 要不你带女孩们去吃冰淇淋
Diane, why don't you take the girls for some ice cream
让我来处理这个住在下水道的排水女巫
while I dispose of this sewer-dwelling gutter witch?
拜 Tammy 总是乐意见到你
Bye, Tammy. Always a pleasure.
她挺可爱的
She's cute.
所以 你想换个地方吗
So, you wanna get out of here?
她的存在让你变成了一碗无味道的中性凝胶
Her very existence renders you a neutered bowl of tasteless gel.
另找个人的生活去糟蹋吧
Find someone else's life to ruin.
你骗不了我的 Ron
You're not fooling me, Ron.
你这个小小的家庭伪装一点都没改变你
This little domestic charade of yours hasn't changed you one bit.
你还是以前的那个Ron Swanson
You're still the same old Ron Swanson.
而我会打败你的
And I will defeat you.
我会在我的裤裆里打败你的
I will defeat you right into my pants.
谢谢 所有人疯起来
Thank you. Everybody go crazy!
好了 谢谢 伙计们 记住
All right, thanks, guys. Remember.
空手道只对坏人用
Karate on bad guys only.
嘿 哥们 你在那边真的很不错啊
Hey, man, you were really great out there.
哦 嘿 Burly 你怎么样啊 哥们
Oh, hey! Burly! How you doing, man?
挺好的啊 哥们 记得我侄子吗 Jack
Pretty good, man. Remember my nephew, Jack?
他是你们的超级粉丝
He's a really big fan.
哇 嘿 Jack 很高兴见到你 小兄弟
Whoa. Hey, Jack. Good to see you, bud.
嘿 听着 哥们 我很抱歉老鼠耗子最后的结局那么奇怪
Hey, listen, man, I'm really sorry things ended so weird with Mouse Rat.
你知道那真不是我想象我们散伙的方式 你知道吧
You know that's not really how I pictured us breaking up, you know?
是啊 我知道
Yeah, I do know.
我总觉得我们会 你知道 无所谓 散伙是因为我进了小马队
I always figured we'd, you know, whatever, break up because I got drafted by the Colts.
然后在第一场比赛 当然了 我摔断了腿
And then in the first game, of course, I break my leg.
人群开始欢呼我的名字 然后我给他们竖起大拇指
The crowd starts chanting my name, and I give them the thumbs up.
然后我去医院 我真的很擅长下棋
And then I go to the hospital, I get really good at chess,
我最终终于打败了电脑
I end up beating the computer finally.
然后乐队就有点逐渐疏远了
And then the band just sort of drifts apart.
我就是那么预计的 但是... - 是啊
That was how I saw it, but... - Yeah.
放轻松吧 - 是 回见
Take it easy. - Yeah, see ya.
宝
Babe!
那也太棒了 那是最棒的演出了
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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