公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S06E03
Part 2
Feb. 20, 2024, 9:35 p.m.
别离网啊 Ron 网是最棒的了
Don't leave the grid, Ron. The grid is the best.
如果有啥 你应该上更多的网
If anything, you need to get more on the grid.
网 网 网 网 网 网 网--
Grid, grid, grid, grid, grid, grid, grid--
如果你们帮我退网 我让你俩都早回家
If you help me get off the grid, I will let both of you go home early.
退网 退网 退网 退网
No grid, no grid, no grid, no grid.
Bloomington兽医学校
好了 你迎新会的东西都准备好了吗
All right, so you have everything you need for orientation?
好了啊 一个空雪碧瓶 兜里一个老人的指甲
Yeah, an empty Sprite can, an old man's fingernail in my pocket,
还有一张Patrick Ewing在过山车上的照片
and a picture of Patrick Ewing on a roller coaster.
我准备好了 - 很好
I'm all set. - Great.
嗨 我这位朋友下个月要登记进兽医学校了
Hi. My friend here is enrolling in the vet school next month,
而她想有人带她转转
and she would like to be shown around.
完全没问题 很高兴 我是Laura
Totally, happy to. I'm Laura.
我是April Ludgate Kevorkian
I'm April Ludgate Kevorkian.
所以你跟Laura去
So you go with Laura,
她看起来真是个好人 不需要受到折磨
who seems really nice and does not deserve to be tortured.
而我在宝宝商店那边结束之后再来见你
And I will come meet up with you after I finish at the baby store.
确定想把我留在这跟她一起吗
Sure you wanna leave me here with her?
我要是谋杀犯怎么办 - 哦 挺好笑的
What if I'm a murderer? - Oh, that's funny.
这比我想象中的还要糟糕
This is worse than I could've imagined.
他们的资产负债率也太荒谬了
Their debt-to-equity ratio is ridonkulous.
真是个好笑的词
What a hilarious word.
让我想起了荒山里的一座庙
It reminds me of a ridiculous donkey.
他是最棒的 - 这对他们意味着什么
He's the best. - What does this mean for them?
他们几年前就陷入财政危机了 和Pawnee一样
They were in financial trouble a few years ago, like Pawnee was,
但他们的政♥府♥还在一直借钱
but their government just kept borrowing money.
Eagleton已经在一场史诗般的财政灾难边缘
Eagleton is on the brink of an epic financial disaster.
啊
Ahh.
现在 那才是你对我说过最性感的话
Now that is the sexiest thing you've ever said to me.
真的吗 那个
Really, that?
这下罢免选举要白送给我了
This is gonna hand me the recall election.
我把Pawnee从破产中拯救出来了
I saved Pawnee from bankruptcy.
现在轮到我来提醒人们那个事实
Now I get to remind people of that fact
同时我们看着我们最坏的敌人在破产中崩溃
as we watch our worst enemy collapse into bankruptcy.
此外 猜猜我在比赛之后能怎么做了
Plus, guess what I get to do after the game now.
你假装你是Ingrid
You pretend you're Ingrid.
我们假装这个盒子是我用来做赌注的那篮子苹果
Let's pretend this box is the basket of apples I bet them on the game.
我知道你接下来要干什么
I see where you're going with this.
不 你不知道
No, you don't.
是 你要问我是不是喜欢苹果-- - 你喜欢苹果吗
Yeah, you're gonna ask me if I like apples-- - Do you like apples?
此处指的是《心灵捕手》 "Good Will Hunting"
我们大前天晚上才刚刚看完这部电影的 所以... - 你喜欢苹果吗
We just watched this movie two nights ago, so... - Do you like apples?
我不想这么做 - 那这些苹果怎么样
I don't wanna do this. - How about them apples?
Paul 如果你在看到另一张这种带我名字的
Paul, if you ever see another one of these with my name on it,
我要你开车进森林然后埋了它
I want you to drive into the woods and bury it.
我不能决定谁收到信 先生 我只是送信而已
I don't decide who gets mail, sir. I just deliver it.
推卸责任--
Passing the buck--
懦弱和黑心的人最后的庇护所
the last refuge of the cowardly and black-hearted.
这话有点过分了 - 滚
That seems harsh. - Get out.
我们搞定了你的手♥机♥
We got rid of your cell phone.
这是你最后一张信♥用♥卡♥
This is your last credit card.
你确定要我剪掉这张卡吗
Are you sure you want me to cut up this card?
它让你进停车场啊
It gets you into the parking garage.
我现在要坐公交车了 而且我会用现金付
I'll be taking the bus now, and I'll be paying in cash.
我在世界上还存在什么痕迹 想啊 人们
What other traces of me exist in the world? Think, people.
JJ餐厅不是挂了你一张照片 那次你-- 啊
Isn't there a photo of you up at JJ's diner, from that time when you-- aah!
来啊 Tom
Come on, Tom!
这地方也太难以置信了 有所有我需要的
This place is unbelievable. It has everything I need:
视频监视器 无铅橡皮奶嘴
Video monitors, lead-free pacifiers.
NASCAR车手
这是我第一次见到围嘴上没有印着Dale Earnhardt Jr.的脸的
These are the first bibs I've ever seen without Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s face on them.
真的吗
Really?
April
April?
抱歉 失陪
Excuse me, sorry.
April 你为啥没在迎新会啊
April, why aren't you at orientation?
呃 我刚在迎新会 但它太没劲了 所以我走了
Um, I was at orientation, but it was lame, so I left.
然后我就继续走 现在我在这儿了
And then I kept walking, and now here I am.
我们现在就要回去了 小姐
We are going back there right now, young lady.
不不 - 来吧
Mm-mm. - Come on.
天啊 放手啊 陌生人
God, get off me, stranger.
太抱歉我们迟到了 我们刚从破产早午餐回来
I'm so sorry we're late. We came from our bankruptcy brunch.
著名爵士流行歌♥手
然后Michael Bublé演唱了 但他表演时间有点长了
And Michael Bublé played, but he ran a little long.
我爱Michael Bublé
I love Michael Bublé.
破产早午餐是最好的主意吗
Was a bankruptcy brunch the best idea?
是哦 我们就别吃早午餐了...
Sure, let's not have brunch...
像动物一样
like animals.
嗯 这些支出里有些是有问题的
Well, um, some of these expenditures are questionable.
呃 你们的公共泳池里装满的是瓶装水吗 - 完全身体补水
Uh, you filled the public pools with bottled water? - Total body hydration.
这里这项是什么 这项来自公共工程部的巨大开支
What is this here? This massive expenditure from public works?
啊 是的 嗯 是的
Ah, yes. Well, yes.
我们给全镇买♥♥了HBO
We purchased HBO for the whole town.
不好意思 你们花政♥府♥的钱在电视订阅上吗
I'm sorry. You spent government money on a TV subscription?
HBO的广♥告♥词
那可不是电视
It's not TV.
好了 呃 Leslie为经济复苏组织了一个展示
Leslie All right. Uh, Leslie's put together a presentation for a financial recovery.
很好
Great.
你们可能会觉得很有教育性
You may find it very informative.
我们从第一张幻灯片开始
Let's get started with our first slide.
"哎呀 哎呀 哎呀..."
"Well, well, well..."
啧啧啧
Tsk, tsk, tsk.
JJ 几个月前 我进来这里 然后开始吃鸡蛋
JJ, a few months ago, I came in here and began eating eggs.
他们很好吃 所以我又点了些
They were delicious, so I ordered more.
不久之后 我相信我吃掉了--
Before long, I believe I had eaten--
20分钟内吃了51个鸡蛋
51 eggs in 20 minutes.
做都来不及做 最后十个还在壳里
Couldn't cook 'em fast enough. The last ten were still in the shell.
创造了JJ餐厅记录 然后你拍了他的照片
It was a JJ's Diner record, and you took his picture.
现在 我们需要那张照片 处于隐私原因
Now, we need that picture, for privacy reasons.
好吧 但我不知道任何人能怎么认出是你
Okay, but I don't know how anybody would know it's you.
男人
最多鸡蛋
我们遵循了你的指示
We followed your instructions.
那已经是过多信息了
That's too much information.
我们走
Let's go.
我们现在要去哪啊
Where are we going now?
我在很多的餐厅吃过很多的食物
I've eaten a lot of food in a lot of restaurants.
为啥其他所有人都这么不擅长吃啊
Why is everyone else so bad at eating?
我同意回到这里只是因为我们的协定
I only agreed to come back here because of our deal.
你保证要跟着演吗
Do you promise to play along?
是的 - 是吗
Yes. - Do you?
是的 - 嗨 你回来啦
Yes. - Hi, you're back.
再次问好
Hello again.
你记得的 我是April
As you remember, I'm April,
而这位是Ann 我65岁的奶奶
and this is Ann, my 65-year-old grandmother.
是的 那正是我
Yes, that's who I am.
无论如何 我们很想听一些Bloomington的事情
Anyway, we'd love to hear about Bloomington.
看起来像是个很潮的大学城哎
It seems like a real hip kind of college town.
姥姥 天啊 没人再用"潮"这个词了
Mee-maw, God, no one uses the word hip anymore.
有时候我希望你和你的姐妹会成员们一起在泰坦尼克里下去了
Sometimes I wish you went down on the Titanic with all your sorority sisters.
我很乐意带你们参观校园
I would be happy to show you guys around the campus.
有什么你们特别想看到的地方吗
Is there anything in particular that you wanna see?
你们的本地墓地怎么样
How are your local graveyards?
我有点计划要做
I have some planning to do.
"你们搞砸了
"You blew it.
"彻底砸了
"Super hard.
"完全滑稽
"Complete buffoonery.
"太好笑了" 以及"你们活该"
"It's hilarious." And "You deserve it."
嘿 你觉得或许能稍微少激动一点点吗
Hey, you think you might wanna take it easy on them a little bit?
哦 他们偷走所有钱脱离我们镇的时候少激动了吗
Oh, like they took it easy on us when they stole all our money and seceded from our town?
那是200年前了 冷静点
That was 200 years ago. Cool it.
好吧 我跳过
Fine. I'll skip ahead.
你们有没有帮助我们的计划啊
Do you have a plan that will help us or not?
去死吧
#破产#
我们在州里能借的完全都借完了
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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