糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories S07E12
Part 2
Jan. 2, 2021, 2:38 p.m.
正如你们一家会在圣诞派对的游戏中斗嘴
Just as your family bicker over Christmas party games
或者争执最后一块蛋糕归谁
or who should have the last slice of cake,
我的孩子们
so, my boys,
若弗鲁瓦
若弗鲁瓦 约翰 亨利和狮心王理查
Geoffrey, John, Henry and Richard The Lionheart
约翰
亨利
理查
多年以来 为了谁该继承英格兰王位
have argued with their father, over the years,
亨利二世国王
同他们的父亲争执不休
about who should get the throne of England.
即使是王室婚姻
Even one's royal marriage
也有酸甜苦辣
has had it's ups and downs.
我的花心丈夫处处留情
I was not happy about my husband's
让我很不开心
endless stream of girlfriends,
而当我和前夫
and he was understandably cross
法兰西国王合谋杀他时
when I sided with my ex-husband, the King of France,
路易七世国王
他肯定也很生气
in an effort to kill him.
因此 当你和家人围坐一起
And so, as you sit down with your families,
如果你的家庭和我的有一点相似
and if yours are anything like mine,
请尽量不要在圣诞晚餐时给彼此下毒
try not to poison each other over Christmas dinner.
衷心祝愿大家圣诞快乐
Have a very merry Christmas.
再敢动我的布丁 你就完蛋了
Touch my pudding again and I will end you.
至少在鼠君家族 大家都很友爱
Well, at least the Rattus family are all friends.
我还邀请了我的侄子鼠克拉普斯来做客
Look, I've even invited my nephew Scrappus to visit.
告诉大家我们相处得多愉快 鼠克拉普斯
Tell them how well we all get along, Scrappus.
这太伤人了
Well, that's harsh!
我有两万两千个侄子 鼠克拉普斯
I've got 22,000 nephews, Scrappus!
我不可能记得住你们所有鼠的生日
I can't be expected to remember all your birthdays.
这根本不值得吵
Certainly nothing to fall out about.
有的家族矛盾严重到开战
Some families even went to war.
请看这家
Here's one.
他们是同一家族的两个分支
They were two halves of the same family,
各自成立了自己的王朝
who both founded their own dynasty.
以白玫瑰为族徽的约克家族
The Yorkists, whose symbol is a white rose,
和以红玫瑰为族徽的兰卡斯特家族
and the Lancastrians, whose symbol is a red rose.
他们的冲突引发了 相信你们已经猜到
They clashed during - yes, you've guessed it -
正是玫瑰战争
the Wars Of The Roses.
约克家族 兰卡斯特家族
情况太糟糕 兰卡斯特国王亨利六世
Things got so bad, the Lancastrian King, Henry VI,
尝试用特殊手段让大家重归于好
tried something rather unusual to make everyone friends again.
他把它称为"友爱日"
He called it Love Day!
糟糕历史电视台
新闻联播
欢迎来到这个令人愉悦的日子
And welcome to this lovely occasion,
1458年友爱日
Love Day 1458.
1458年友爱日
圣保罗大教堂现场直播
玛格丽特王后带领着
Yes, led by Queen Margaret,
英格兰王室成员们
members of the English royal family
依次走进圣保罗大教堂
process into St Paul's Cathedral.
偶有失足 看来他确实很紧张
Oh, little stumble there, nerves obviously playing their part!
约克家族佩白色丝带
The Yorkists in their white ribbons,
约克家族佩白色丝带
兰卡斯特家族则系着红丝带
and the Lancastrians in their red.
玛格丽特女王轻轻地
Oh, little shove there from Queen Margaret
兰卡斯特家族系着红色的丝带
推了瓦立克伯爵一下
on the Earl of Warwick.
虽然王室成员看似在打闹
Yes, bit of regal horse play,
但我相信他们都贯彻着和平友爱的精神
but I'm sure all in the spirit of peace and harmony,
现在只差玛格丽特女王的丈夫亨利六世了
and we now just await Queen Margaret's husband, King Henry VI.
他来了
Oh, yes, and there he is.
国王亨利六世向贵族来宾们致辞
大伙儿干得不错啊
Ok, great stuff, guys!
干得不错 真棒 大家都静一静
Great stuff, that's lovely. Let's all just simmer down.
今天的目的是让你们小兰兰 互敬
So, the aim today is to get you Lankies - big up!
和你们小约约 互爱
and you Yorkies - respect!
共聚一堂 感受友爱
together in one room, just feeling the love,
共建和谐快乐的大家庭
one big happy family.
你们每人只需要靠在你身边的人身上
So, all you have to do, just lean over to the person next to you
然后牵住他的手
and just hold hands, yeah?
妙啊 又疯了一个国王
Great, a King's gone mad again.
反正我也打算让约克公爵来夺权的
Yeah, thinking of getting the Duke of York to take over, anyway.
你和谁的军队呢
You and whose army?!
我和 我的军队
Well, me...and my army.
-我和我的军队 -我的
- Me and my army! - Mine!
-不不不停手 -敌对双方相处的很融洽
- No, no, no, no! - And the rival side's getting along swimmingly.
在三年血腥的战争后
Yes, how wonderful it is
看见这些贵族成员重新聚在一起
to see these noble families back together,
多么令人开心啊
after three years of bloody fighting.
大家静一静
Guys, guys!
这两大家族真的进行过长达三年的战争
别忘了今天是什么日子
Hey! Let's remember what today's called.
友爱日
Love Day!
不是争斗之日
It's not Fight Day, is it?
也不是用胳膊夹住别人的头然后用...
It's not Grab Someone In A Headlock And Beat Them With A...
-那是什么 -是个勺子
- What's that? - It's a spoon.
用勺子敲爆它之日
..Spoon Day.
今天的主题是友爱
Today is all about love.
所以无论过去发生了什么
So, whatever's happened in the past,
我们只需要忘掉那些不愉快然后互相牵手
we just need to forget about that and hold hands.
和杀了自己父亲的人
It's hard to hold hands
-牵手可不太容易 -他也杀了我父亲
- with the man who's killed your dad. - And mine!
好吧 但重要的是
Ok, but the important thing
他们已经说了他们很抱歉
is that they've said they are really sorry.
-他们没说 -我们也不感到抱歉啊
- No, actually, they haven't. - Well, we're not.
那我让你认错怎么样
How about I make you sorry?
-那你就杀了我呀 -这可是你说的
- Over my dead body! - Oh, you said it, pal!
大家听着
Look, guys!
在这美好的一天里 大家都充满活力
They're in high spirits indeed on this, uh, wonderful day...
大家停一停
Guys!
我们就不能互相牵手吗
Can we all, for one day,
就这一天的时间
just hold hands?!
我们不要重蹈圣诞节时的覆辙了
Let's not have a repeat of Christmas.
这就对了 现在你们二位先生 请吧
Right? Right, now you two gents, come on.
这就对了 这很难吗
There you go. How hard was that?
快点吧 我们可不能在这耗一整天
Come on, we haven't got all day.
还有女士们
And you ladies.
就这样
And there we have it.
在他们离开大教堂之时
As they make their way out of the Cathedral,
1458年友爱日
值得铭记的一天
真高兴看到大家团结友爱的样子
it's amazing to see the spirit of friendship and togetherness.
这比我想象中顺利得多
Well, that actually went better than I thought it would.
约克家族和兰卡斯特家族打了三十多年
The Yorkists and the Lancastrians fought for over 30 years,
直到兰卡斯特的一个分支
until finally the war was won,
都铎家族
by a branch of the Lancaster side
赢得战争的最终胜利
called the Tudors.
多铎
但这个家族的故事也一样错综复杂
But things were almost as complicated for them,
这一切都从多铎国王亨利八世
and it all started when the Tudor king, Henry VIII,
有了一个叫玛丽的女儿开始
had a daughter called Mary.
玛丽公主
四百九十年前
嘿 天主教民们
Hey, Catholic crew!
我是玛丽
Mary here!
#爸爸的小公主#
Hashtag Daddy's little princess!
一点儿没错 因为我爸爸是亨利八世
No, totally, because Daddy is Henry VIII
而我是他唯一活下来的孩子
and I'm the only surviving child, so,
所以未来要当女王了
going to be Queen one day!
继承人玛丽公主
四百九十年前
大家好
Hello!
-爸爸 你太尴尬了 -抱歉 亲爱的
- Dad, you're so embarrassing! - Sorry, darling...
继位更新
亨利八世国王的继承人 女儿玛丽
继承人玛丽公主
四百九十年前
好吧 亨利八世 我爸
Ok, so Henry VIII - Dad -
说他和我妈阿♥拉♥贡的凯瑟琳的婚姻
is saying that his marriage to my mum, Catherine of Aragon,
不算数 因为她和他死掉的哥哥有过婚姻
doesn't count because she used to be married to his dead brother
然后他十♥八♥年♥后才意识到这一点
and he's only just realised that, like, 18 years later,
糟糕历史（2009）
Horrible Histories
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