副总统（2012）

Veep S01E01

Part 5 Oct. 12, 2020, 8:23 p.m.

因为我忙着跟倒霉的拖沓
Because I am busy in there apologizing to that...
道歉
Fucktard.
天啊
God!
好吧
Okay. It's fine.
Burton先生我很抱歉
Mr. Burton. I am so sorry.
今天真是状况百出
We're having a complicated day here.
我不太想开这个新闻发布会
I'm not happy about having to give this press briefing.
当然您的幸福与否是我的首要任务
Yeah, and of course your happiness is top of my agenda,
远远高于气候问题和买♥♥卖♥♥儿童
right above climate control and child trafficking.
天啊会不会发展成狗血情节
Oh, my gosh, is this gonna become like Moonlighting
我们坠入爱河然后开始乱搞
where we fall in love and start fucking?
Gary要去Jonah的办公室
Amy: Gary is going to go to Jonah's office
然后神不知鬼不觉地把卡拿回来
and somewhat surreptitiously get the card back.
我没穿大衣我得把卡藏起来
Well, I don't have a coat. I need to hide the card.
我大衣上有咖啡
There's coffee on my coat.
你可以借我的大衣
Sue: You can borrow my coat.
谢谢 Sue 谢谢 Sue
Thank you, Sue. Thank you, Sue.
谢谢 Sue - 解决办法 Sue
- Thanks, Sue. - Solution, Sue.
当然有解决办法 - 谢谢
- Of course. There's some solutions. - Thank you.
谢谢你真好
Thank you so much. That was really kind of you.
首先你要把帽子摘了
First of all, you should put the hood down.
我没打算把帽子戴上
I wasn't going to put the hood up.
祝你好运 Gary
Well, good luck, Gary.
我相信你还是能干好的
I am convinced that you can probably do this.
谢谢
Thank you.
用我通知他们你要来吗
Sue: Want me to ring through, tell them you're coming?
不天啊 - 好吧一个笑话
- No, my God! - Okay, okay, a joke.
点燃了现场的情绪
Hello. Lightening the mood here.
天啊 - Amy 想个B计划吧
- Oh, my God. - Amy, come up with a plan B.
好吧因为...
Okay? 'Cause...
Gary?
Jonah.
你是来偷那张错签的卡吗
Are you here to steal the incorrectly-signed card?
拜托不是 - 这场面看上去真的很糟
- Come on, no. - This looks really bad.
不糟 - Gary 我是你朋友
- It's not bad. - Gary, I'm a friend of yours.
我觉得你不是
I don't think you are.
根本不是 - 我开玩笑呢
- At all. - I'm just kidding.
Gary 放松好吗我会把卡给你
Gary, loosen up, okay? I'm gonna give you the card, all right?
好吗说实话我有点害怕
Alright. To be honest, I was a little scared.
是啊是啊
Yeah, yeah.
给你 - 谢谢
There It is. - Thank you.
只是真的 - 好吧
- It's just really... - Okay.
抱歉 - 说条件吧
- I'm sorry. - Let's just get to the bad part.
说吧因为我知道你有条件
Let's just get to the bad part 'cause I know you got one.
我不喜欢这种紧张气氛
I don't like tension. I got acid reflux. Let's get to the bad part.
我想今晚和Amy约会
I want Amy to go on a date with me tonight.
好吧好吧好吧这不可能
Okay, okay, okay. That's impossible.
别担心好吗我们不会上♥床♥
Don't worry about it, okay? We're not gonna have sex, all right?
因为她恨我 - 好吧
Because She hates me. - Okay. Uh-huh.
但Amy是个8分 - 好吧
- But Amy's an eight. - Okay.
如果所有我想与之发♥生♥关♥系♥的8分
And if all the other eights that I do want to have sex with
知道我能把到一个8分
see that I am eight-capable,
那我很快就能和一个8分上♥床♥了
then I'm going to be having sex with an eight very soon.
这是实习季 Gary
It is intern season, Gary.
你看我像拉皮条的吗
Do I look like a pimp to you?
你看起来就是个拉皮条的
You look exactly like a pimp.
Dan 等着掉馅饼呢
Dan, waiting for some crumbs to fall?
去死 - 不
- Fuck off. - Sue: Uh, no.
我得和她谈一下
Got to talk to her for one moment, please.
她现在真的很忙
No, she's actually really burdened right now with a bunch of...
真的一秒钟的事
Sue, it'll take one second, literally.
Mike 她在转圈呢 - 好吧我再来
- Mike, she's spinning. - Oh, okay. I'll come back.
嘿小南瓜什么事
Hey, what's up, pumpkin?
你怎么还在这儿
What the fuck are you still doing here?
副总统让我来的
Vice President asked me to stop by.
好吧
Right.
加油 Gary 加油加油 Gary
Go, Gary. Go, go, go, Gary.
加油 Gary - 干得好
- Go, Gary. - Well done, buddy.
不你 - 是的
- No, you didn't. - Yes.
拿到了 - 是的
- You got it? - Yes, I did.
哇 Gary 你干得好
Wow, Gary. Good for you.
很好抱歉
Good for... oh. Excuse me.
嘿很好
Hey, all right.
是的虽然我和Jonah做了交易
Yeah, although I did have to make a deal with Jonah.
Amy今晚要和他约会
Amy's got to go on a date with him tonight.
不不行
Oh, no, she's not.
他不想和你上♥床♥
Well, he doesn't want to have sex with you.
只想晚饭和电影
He just wants dinner and a movie.
不 Amy不会和Jonah约会的
No, Amy is not going on a date with Jonah.
镇静不上♥床♥的约会
Get a grip. It's a date and no sex.
对我来讲这是12年的婚姻
For me, that was 12 years of marriage.
我给你们找个旅馆
- I'll get you guys a motel. - Ugh.
天啊不
Selina: Oh, God, no!
闪开闪开闪开
Make a hole! Make a hole! Make a hole!
天啊 - 看看这个
- Oh, my God. - Look at this.
什么什么 - 看
What? What? - Look.
总统已经签了这个
The President already signed this one.
我们得在新的上伪造总统的签名
Okay? We're gonna have to forge the President's signature on the new one.
这可是死刑
Gary: Well, that's a capital offense.
告诉你们这可是会被电椅处决的
Yeah, you could be legally electrocuted for doing that, just so you know.
我没在我很明确地拒绝了
I'm not here. I have plausible deniability.
听着我来我做
Dan: Look, I'll do it. I got it.
关键是上下颠倒了
The key is you do it upside down.
太夸张了
That is extraordinary.
有你不能做的吗
Is there anything you can't do?
前戏阳光直射
Amy: Foreplay, direct sunlight.
女士我任您差遣 - Amy 是的
- Ma'am, I am at your service. - Um, Amy, yes.
我想和你谈谈这事
I wanted to talk to you about this.
我给Dan提供了一份永久职位
I have offered Dan a permanent post
在这个办公室好的
Here in The office. - Okay.
很好 - 没问题
Great. - Not a problem.
我去给黑莓充电
I'll get the BlackBerry fired up.
我没问题 - 好的
Sounds good to me. - Here We go.
有时间吗 - 有
do you have a second? - Sure.
你雇他了 - 嗯
you hired him? - Mm-hmm.
你雇了华盛顿头号♥混♥蛋♥
You hired the biggest bastard in D.C.?
是的我擅长和混♥蛋♥打交道
Oh, yeah, well, I'm fluent in bastard.
是我的招牌之一
Okay? It's one of my languages.
Amy 我利用Dan得到我想要的东西
Amy, I used Dan to get what I wanted.
他利用你得到他想要的
He used you to get what he wanted.
不我肯定是利用他
Uh-uh, no. I definitely used him.
我是利用者他是被用者
I'm the user, and he's the usee.
好吧 Amy 来了
Okay, Amy, here we go.
虾仁意面再来一个A片
Shrimp Linguini and a porno.
嘿开玩笑
Oh, hey. I'm just kidding.
是鸡肉意面我马上到
It's chicken Linguini. I'll be over here.
Dan是个阴谋家他很狡猾
Dan is manipulative. He is cunning.
我知道所以我才会雇他你为什么不听我的
I know. That's why I hired him. Why aren't you listening to me?
半年内所有这些烂事消停了
In six months, when all this bullshit dies down,
我们往清洁工作委员会里安插一个石油的人
we're gonna put an oil guy on the clean jobs commission.
你要往清洁工作上泼石油
You're pouring oil on clean jobs?
天啊 Amy 成熟点吧
Oh, please, please, Amy, grow up.
他们就是这样解决古巴导弹问题的
This is how they solved the Cuban missile crisis.
这是我的古巴
This is my Cuba.
Dan告诉你这是你的古巴吗
Did Dan tell you that this is your Cuba?
他真是坨屎
He's such a shit.
我知道我就是想告诉你这个
I know, that's what I'm trying to tell you.
你就是把他当坨屎卖♥♥给我的所以我雇了他
You sold him to me as a shit and that's why I hired him.
他恶心屎我了我需要这坨屎
He's shitty me, okay? I need a shit.
你一定会后悔 - Amy 我需要屎
- You are so going to regret... - Amy, I need a shit.
有人吗你好 - 你好
- Knock, knock. Hello. - Hello.