生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S06E12
Part 2
Oct. 6, 2019, 7:39 p.m.
一实验室不怕死的毒瘾疯猴 随时听候差遣
One of them could end up in the backseat of her car.
可以扔一个进她的汽车后座
Or her shower.
或是她的浴室
Ladies, ladies, please.
女士们 女士们 拜托
We're not here to talk about Penny, okay?
我们不是来这里讨论佩妮的 好吗
We're here to talk about me.
我们是来讨论我的
Uh, I mean Einstein Von Brainst... Oh, darn it!
我是说爱因斯坦·冯·集思... 我靠
All right, I guess the cat's out of the bag.
好吧 说溜嘴了
Let me explain what's going on
那我就来解释下发生了什么事吧
Ricardo is really Leonard...
里卡多其实是莱纳德...
We know what's going on, Sheldon!
我们知道发生了什么事 谢尔顿
Well, what should I do?
那我应该怎么做
Well, Alex is your employee.
艾利克斯是你的员工
If she's doing something that's making Leonard uncomfortable,
如果她做出一些让莱纳德觉得不舒服的事
you should talk to her.
那你应该跟她谈谈
Oh, no, he's not uncomfortable at all.
不 他才没有不舒服呢
No, he's loving it.
他暗爽死了好吗
Yeah, he's strutting around like he's five foot six.
对啊 他趾高气昂地好像自己有两米那么高
What... He's loving it?
什么 他很暗爽
Sheldon, you need to talk to Alex right away.
谢尔顿 你得马上跟艾利克斯谈谈
Talk to her? That's all you've got?
谈谈 就只有这种建议啊
With a cool name like Sheldon Cooper's Council of Ladies,
"谢尔顿·库伯姐妹顾问团"的名字这么牛气
I really expected more.
我本来期望很高呢
T恤还我 Give me back the T shirts.
把
Alex...
艾利克斯
check my schedule.
查下我的日程表
What does my afternoon look like?
今天下午我有什么安排
I think it's pretty wide open.
我记得好像没有任何安排
Oh, wait. Here's something at 4:00.
慢着 四点有安排
"Give Alex a talking to"?
"跟艾利克斯谈谈"
Well, that snuck up on us, didn't it?
这安排真是悄无声息出人意料啊
Is there a problem?
有什么问题吗
Let's not call it a problem.
那其实不叫问题
Let's call it an opportunity.
我们应该称其为"机会"
To solve a serious problem.
一个解决严重问题的机会
What did I do?
我做错什么了
You don't know? Oh, you poor dear.
你不知道吗 可怜的小宝贝
Your ovaries are squirting so much goofy juice
你的卵巢把太多愚蠢分泌物
into your brains you don't even know which way is up.
都送到你脑子 害你人都傻了
You made an inappropriate sexual advance
你对霍夫斯塔德博士做出
towards Dr. Hofstadter. What?
不恰当的性企图 什么
I didn't make a sexual advance on anybody.
我没有对任何人做任何性企图
Now, there's no need to get defensive.
别这么快就开始激动辩解
I'm not unsympathetic to your plight.
我对你的情况表示同情
My father used to say that a woman
我的父亲过去常说 女人就像
is like an egg salad sandwich on a warm Texas day.
德州温暖天气中的鸡蛋沙拉三明治
What?
什么意思
Full of eggs and only appealing for a short time.
鸡蛋[卵子]满满 诱惑短短[容易坏]
This conversation is making me uncomfortable.
这次谈话让我觉得很不舒服
Yeah, you and me both, sister.
不止你 我也是 妹妹
Now,
现在
please understand...
请你明白
I don't hold you responsible for your behavior
你的行为 我并不觉得是你的错
because, see, from an evolutionary standpoint,
因为从进化的角度看
you're a slave to your desire to reproduce.
你不过是自身繁殖欲望的奴隶
But during the work day,
但在工作时间
when you feel possessed by amorous intent,
当你觉得自己有求欢的意图时
may I suggest that you suppress it
我能否建议你
by leafing through this illustrated book
通过翻阅这本性传播疾病的绘本
of sexually transmitted diseases?
来抑制住你的欲望
Let's see here. Oh, yes.
我们看一下 就这页
Check out this oozy doozy.
你看看这张小恶心图片
I have to go.
我要走了
So does this fellow,
这位仁兄也是
but he can't without it burning like hot soup.
但他走不了 他那里就跟热汤那样烧得慌
Hey, pretty lady.
嗨 美女
Oh, you seem extra happy.
你看起来格外开心啊
Uh, I guess I am.
应该是吧
Any particular reason why?
有什么特别的原因吗
Mm, I don't know, just having a good day.
不知道 就是今天过得还不错
This morning Sheldon fell asleep on the way to work,
早上谢尔顿在去上班的路上睡着了
so I got to listen to the radio
所以我有机会听广播
that was pretty crazy.
好疯狂的一早
Anything else?
还有别的吗
I found this quiz online called
我在网上发现一个小测试
Which Star Trek Character Are You?"
名叫"测测你是星际迷航中的谁" "
and it only took me four tries to get Captain Kirk.
我测了四次 终于测到柯克船长[角色]
That's great.
很好啊
Oh. It. Was.
的确如此
Well, I'm glad you're having such a great day.
很高兴你今天过得这么开心
And the one thing that could make it even better
还有一件让我更开心的事就是
is an evening with my special girl.
晚上要跟我特别的姑娘约会
Oh, and who's that?
哪一个啊
What do you mean?
这话什么意思
Oh, I just didn't know if you meant me or Alex.
我不知道特别的姑娘 是指我还是艾利克斯
Um, why would I mean Alex?
为什么会指艾利克斯
Because I know she hit on you
因为我知道她对你有意思
and I know you liked it!
而且我还知道你很暗爽
What...?
哪里...有
Don't play dumb with me, Ricardo Shilly Shally!
别跟老娘装傻 里卡多·谢利沙力
I'm missing something.
我是不是漏了什么事
Did you say something to Penny about Alex?
你是不是跟佩妮说了艾利克斯的事
Oh, yes. Yeah, and a fat lot of good it did me.
没错 而且还得到了"很多帮助"呢
All she did was get mad at you.
"帮助"就是她光顾着生你的气了
Why would you do that?
你为什么要这样做
I needed advice about a woman.
我需要关于女人的建议
I would have asked you,
我本来可以问你的
but if the last few years have proven anything,
但要说过去几年证明了什么
it's that you can't tell a uterus from a unicycle.
那就是你连子♥宫♥和独轮车都分不清
At least I know not to blab to a girl
至少我知道随便对女生透露
about somebody flirting with her boyfriend.
有人追她男友是不对的
Good to know.
知道这个太好了
Yeah, a few more helpful hints like that,
你再多说点这类的金玉良言
you may find yourself on the Council of Ladies.
就可以名正言顺地加入姐妹顾问团了
Hello.
你好
I see.
这样啊
Uh, what time?
几点
Very well, then.
好的
That was the Human Resources Department at the university.
是学校的人事部打来的
Apparently, my assistant Alex has filed a complaint
我的助理艾利克斯居然投诉了我
accusing me of inappropriate behavior in the workplace.
说我在办公场所有不当行为
Oh, my God, what did you do?
老天啊 你做了什么
Hmm, let me think.
我回忆一下
Nothing. I'm a delight.
没什么啊 我超萌超有爱的
Human Resources Department.
人事部
Human Resources Department.
人事部
Human Resources Department.
人事部
Come in.
请进
Hello.
你好
Ah, Dr. Cooper, have a seat.
是你啊 库珀博士 请坐吧
Thank you.
谢谢
I called you in today because your assistant
我今天叫你来是因为你的助理
Alex Jensen has lodged a complaint against you.
艾利克斯·詹森投诉了你
So I've been told.
我听说了
But I can't understand what she has to complain about.
但我不明白她有什么可抱怨的
I mean, she has a front row seat as I make scientific history.
她处在见证我改写科学界历史的最前线
There's string cheese in my mini fridge,
我的迷你冰箱里随时备有奶酪棒
and that's for anyone.
大家都可以享用
Yeah, and just yesterday
而且就在昨天
I led her away from a life of sexual promiscuity
我向她展示染上妇科病的生殖器图片
by making her look at pictures of disease ridden genitalia.
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The Big Bang Theory
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