生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S05E03

Part 2 Oct. 4, 2019, 2:25 p.m.

当然没有
Sure she would.
老妈你不介意Bernadette 这周末住这吧?
Ma,do you mind if Bernadette stays here this weekend?!
她都能免费让你喝奶了我怎么会拒绝呢?
Hey,if she's willing to give the milk away for free,who am I to say no?!
看吧她不介意
See?She's good with it.
说实话你跟那印度小伙一起过夜后只要是个女孩来住我都不介意!
Frankly,after all your sleepovers with the little brown boy,a girl is a big relief!
我竟然错了这么多年
All these years,I've been so wrong.
火车越小乐趣越多
The tinier the train,the more concentrated the fun.
你是研究大脑的科学家
You're a brain scientist.
解释下为什么一个如此聪明的人喜欢玩玩具火车?
Can you explain to me why a brilliant man likes playing with toy trains?
除非让我切开他脑袋
Not without cutting his head open,no.
把我的眼睛画得像埃及艳后怎么样?
How about making my eyes like Cleopatra?
合适吗? 出席婚礼?
Really?For a wedding?
大概你是对的
Perhaps you're right.
我的颧骨和诱人的骨盆已经足够惹人遐想了
My cheekbones and beckoning pelvis already have a certain "hello sailor" quality to them.
我好了
Ready.
好酷像007
So handsome. Like James Bond.
他比007好因为他更精小
He's better than James Bond,because he's tinier.
我为你准备了这个给我戴上
I got you this to give to me.
亲婚礼上人们一般不戴胸花
Oh,sweetie,guests don't normally wear corsages to a wedding.
舞会上才戴
That's more of a prom thing.
我从来没去过舞会
I never went to my prom.
我妈给我表哥钱让他带我去但他用那钱磕药了
My mom paid my cousin to take me,but he just used the money to buy drugs.
给她戴上吧
Put the corsage on her.
Amy 这是给你的
Amy,this is for you.
你摸完后记得戴我手腕上
When you're done copping a feel,that goes on my wrist.
火车开啦!
All aboard!
正式宣布
It's official.
我是H-0型火车迷啦
I'm an H-O trainiac.
晚餐进行得很顺利
So,dinner went nice.
恩还行吧
Yeah. Yeah,I guess.
你妈总会帮你切肉吗?
Does your mother always cut your meat for you?
有肥肉时才会
Only when it's fatty.
宝贝不要嫉妒嘛
Well,don't be jealous,babe.
总有一天会轮到你的
Someday you'll get to cut it for me.
Bernadette 我找到个新的冲牙器你要用吗?
Bernadette!I found the extra head for the Waterpik if you want to use it!
- 不用了 Wolowitz夫人 - 你确定?
- I'm okay,Mrs. Wolowitz. - You sure?!
我刚从牙缝里冲出一大块鸡胸肉
I just squirted half a brisket outta my teeth!
老妈给点隐私好不好啊
Hey,Ma,how about a little privacy?!
老妈明白嘿♥咻♥嘿♥咻♥
Oh,I know what that means! Hubba-hubba!
天呐
Oh,God.
没事的放轻松
Relax,it'll be fine.
好吧
Okay.
你们亲热完给我说声
Let me know when you're done canoodling!
老妈需要做个足底按♥摩♥
Mommy needs a foot rub!
你想要跳舞吗?
Would you like to dance?
不了谢谢我跳舞很烂
No,thank you.I'm really not much of a dancer.
你显然也不怎么健谈
You're not exactly winning any trophies as a conversationalist,either.
抱歉啊
I'm sorry.
那对新人玩得很开心啊
The bride and groom seem happy.
当然开心啦
Why shouldn't they be?
在这么一个激♥情♥四射的夜晚他们马上就可以名正言顺地交♥配♥了
They have a feverish night of socially-approved copulation ahead of them.
在某些文化里我们会守在卧室门口庆祝他们性高♥潮♥的到来
In some cultures,we'd stand outside of their bedroom cheering as they achieved orgasm.
看样子会玩到很晚啊我明天还要早起工作
That sounds like a late night,and I have work in the morning,so...
Leonard 你也许并没发现我现在玩得很开心
Leonard,you may not have noticed,but I am being a delight here.
你好像整个人都心不在焉的样子
And you're not holding up your end of the evening.
不好意思啊这场景让我很想念我那远在印度所谓的女友
Oh,sorry. This wedding just reminds me of my kinda-sorta girlfriend 9,000 miles away.
我那所谓的男友正在家里玩小火车
I have a kinda-sorta boyfriend who's playing with a model train right now,
我也没抱怨什么啊
you don't hear me bitching about it.
Leonard 提个小建议装深沉只有在比你高...
Leonard,a word of advice-- moody self-obsession is only attractive in men
而且会弹吉他的男人身上有用
who can play guitar and are considerably taller than you.
我没有郁闷啊
I'm not moody.
我很开心
I'm fun.
你有证据证明你很开心吗?
You have any evidence to support that statement?
我和你一样开心啊
Well,hey,I'm just as much fun as you are.
真的吗?
Really?
你会在手指上画八字胡来打破这个僵局吗
Are you willing to draw a mustache on your finger as a conversational icebreaker?
我就会哦
I am.
好吧你想怎样啊?
Okay,fine,what do you suggest?
我们已经饱餐了一顿乐队...正在激♥情♥弹奏
We just had a lovely meal,the band... is on fire...
你旁边正坐着一位浓妆艳抹的大美女
and you're sitting next to a beautiful woman wearing whorish makeup.
我们可以去跳个舞然后跳到浑身是汗
Why don't we head out on the dance floor and see if I can sweat through these dress shields.
再重申一遍我跳舞真的很烂
Once again,I-I'm really not much of a dancer.
没关系我来带你
Don't worry... I'll lead.
Howard?
Howard?
准备睡觉啦?
Ready for bed?
还没我要刷牙可是你妈霸占洗手间都快一小时了
No. I need to brush my teeth,but your mother's been in the bathroom for,like,an hour.
是她有时候是很慢等一下哦
Yeah,she sometimes has problems doing her business.Hang on.
老妈赶紧出来吧
Ma,give up!
今晚你上不出来的!
Tonight's not your night!
你咋知道我才坐下
You don't know that!I just sat down!
那休息一会啊
Come on,take a break!
Bernadette想要刷牙
Bernadette needs to brush her teeth!
她可以进来刷牙我不会难为情的
She can come in and brush her teeth!I'm not embarrassed!
问题解决了
Problem solved.
不要我才不去呢
No,it's not.I'm not going in there.
亲爱的不要这样嘛
Oh,come on,honey.
她只是坐在那里看杂♥志♥而已
She's just sitting in there reading a magazine.
你不会看到什么的我经常这样进去的
You can't see anything.I go in all the time.
哈哈雄鹰着陆了(便便出来了)
Ha! The eagle has landed!
成功入"海"
And we have splashdown.
等一下我去点根蜡烛
Wait here,I'm gonna go light a candle.
然后我们就开始翻云覆雨
And then we make passionate love.
马上到了哦最后一层
There we go,last floor.
我都不知道怎么回事
I just can't figure out what happened.
我就把脚伸来伸去几次就扭到了
I put my left leg in,I took my left leg out,I put my left leg in,and something just snapped.
集体排舞是年轻人的游戏
The hokey pokey is a young man's game.
我真的玩得很开心
I did have a great time.
多谢你让我玩得这么开心啊
Thank you for reminding me it's okay to have fun once in a while.
不客气
You're welcome.
也谢谢你把天鹅冰雕的头掰下来好让我抵着拉伤的腹股沟
And also for breaking the head off the ice swan so I could hold it against my pulled groin.
我特擅长推理我预感到...
I excel at spatial reasoning,and I had a hunch
它那曲线柔和的脖子能很好地支撑你的生殖器
that the graceful slope of its neck would cradle your genitals nicely.
好还是谢谢了
Well,okay.Again,thank you.
还是不客气
And again,you're welcome.
进来喝杯茶吗?
Want to come in,have a cup of tea?
不了谢谢我得回家了
No,thanks.I'm gonna head home.
那好晚安
oKay.Well,good night.
晚安
Good night.
Ames 嗨
Ames,hi.
婚礼怎么样?
How was the wedding?
挺好的
Great.
不过我不小心让Leonard爱上我之后就不好玩了
Until I accidentally made Leonard fall in love with me.
进来咱聊聊
Come in,let's talk.
要来杯酒吗?
Do you want a glass of wine?
我来不就是为了喝杯嘛
Wine is one of the reasons I'm in this fix.
还因为我这诱人的屁♥股♥
That and this dang pelvis.
到底怎么回事?
Okay,I'm sorry,what exactly happened?
也算是必然的他没了女朋友既孤独又脆弱
The inevitable-- he was lonely and vulnerable from missing his girlfriend,
我呢既美丽又善解人意还有瞧我这身
while I was charming,supportive and,let's face it,
整个一淫♥荡♥版麦当娜
in this dress,the perfect combination of Madonna and whore.
天哪他对你动手动脚了?
Oh,God,did he make a move on you?
还没不过只是时间问题
No,but it's only a matter of time.
我怎么就没预料到呢?
How could I have not seen this coming?
我现在不得不伤那小可怜的心了
Now I'm gonna have to break the little sad sack's heart.
他肯定会没事的
Yeah,I'm sure he'll be okay.
Penny 虽然咱俩被同一个男人搞过我会很开心
Oh,Penny,much as I would treasure knowing that the two of us had been defiled by the same man,
Leonard实在提不起我的"性"致
Leonard just doesn't get my motor running.
你想怎么办呢?
So,um,what are you gonna do?
用我跟他谈谈不? 婉拒他?
Do you want me to talk to Leonard,let him down easy?
不让他爽一晚上吧
No. I'll let him have tonight.