小镇滋味

-你来干什么 -我决定我需要你回到我的生活
- What are you doing here? - I decided I need you back in my life.
是吗
Really?
那太好了
That sounds great!
我或许永远不会让你走
I may never let you go.
这听上去就没那么好了
That sounded less great.
我的球上没有腿
There's no legs on my ball.
洛基的也没有
Or Loki's.
这本塞尔维亚书里肯定写了什么
There's gotta be something in this Serbian book.
你以为肯定会有专门的一章写蜘蛛怪
You'd think spider monsters would be worthy of their own chapter.
我把我的球解冻 看看会怎么样
Maybe I'll defrost my ball and see what happens.
别解冻
Do not defrost it.
它曾经在我体内 乔
This was inside of me, Joel.
我的身体 我的球 我做主
My body, my ball, my choice.
拜托 要是今年我能赢一次争论 就让我赢这个吧
Please, God, if I win one argument this year, let it be this one.
好吧 我不解冻 除非你一直告诉我我不能
Fine, I won't thaw it out. Unless you keep telling me I can't.
我们要怎么处理雷蒙娜
What are we gonna do about Ramona?
不能让她四处遗留尸体
We can't have her leaving bodies around.
我知道 你觉得我们得...
I know. Do you think we'll have to...?
-我不想杀她 -很好 我也不想
- I don't want to kill her. - Good. Me neither.
她跟艾比差不多大吧
She's, like, Abby's age.
再说 她是那家药店里
Plus, she's the only one at that drugstore
唯一在乎顾客满意度的
who gives a damn about customer satisfaction.
或许我们能教她
Maybe we could teach her.
我们去杀我们第一个纳粹的时候可以叫上她
We could have her tag along when we go kill our first Nazi.
我说不好 亲爱的 我们事情好多
I don't know, honey. We've got a lot on our plate.
我不想开一所活死人的精修学校
I don't wanna be opening up a finishing school for the undead.
天啊
Oh, my God!
这骑士的盾牌上有球腿先生
That knight has Mr. Ball Legs on his shield.
-这是什么意思 -不知道
- What does it mean? - I don't know.
他是对抗活死人的骑士吗
Is he a knight that fights the undead?
还是活死人骑士
Or is he an undead knight?
无论如何 都很恐怖
Either way, it's terrifying.
我意识到这不是他们的错 是该死的塞尔维亚的
I realize it's not their fault, but fucking Serbia!
除了网球运动员
Other than tennis players,
他们国家还出产过任何好的事物吗
has anything good come out of that country?
我回来了
I'm home!
你们刚才在做什么
You were doing something.
-我发誓 每次都这样 -没有
- I swear to God, every time. - Mm- mm.
艾比 学校怎么样
Hey, Abby, how was school?
正常 就像你们所希望的那样
Normal, just like you wanted.
你们不是请了丽莎来吃晚餐吗
Hey, didn't you guys invite Lisa for dinner tonight?
为了补偿杀死她丈夫
You know, to make up for you killing her husband,
以及以他为食
and this one eating him?
-天 我们完全忘了 -必须得取消
- Oh, God, we completely forgot! - We have to cancel.
不行
We can't.
这次晚餐就是为了补偿上次取消的
This was the dinner to make up for the last one we canceled.
你们要是再取消
Mm, if you cancel again,
或许会让你们看上去什么都不懂
it might look like you don't know what you're doing.
我们知道 艾比
We know, Abby,
我们什么都不擅长因为我们是你父母
we're bad at everything because we're your parents.
不 是因为在此之前
No, it's because prior to this,
你们过着无忧无虑 快乐的郊区生活
you led a mindlessly happy suburban existence,
让你们从根本上
which left you fundamentally unprepared
不知道如何应付生死攸关的决定
to deal with the life-and-death decisions
而现在每时每刻都困扰着你们
that now plague your every waking moment.
-老天 -别听她的
- Jesus. - Don't listen to her.
我去解冻一份千层面
I'll defrost a frozen lasagna.
你能去地下室拿瓶红酒吗
Can you go down to the basement and grab a bottle of wine?
-还有从地震应急包里拿包汤 -好
- And a soup from the earthquake kit. - Okay.
真希望能有一天能按计划进行
But just sometime, I'd like one day to go as planned.
明天 我保证 全天都搭书架
Tomorrow, I promise. All bookshelves, all day.
当然 明天
Sure, tomorrow.
-抱歉我打击了老爸 -不是你的错
- I'm sorry I broke Dad. - Oh, it's not your fault.
又是雷蒙娜 又是球腿先生 他今天太累了
Between Ramona and Mr. Ball Legs, he's had a big day.
-什么腿先生 -摆桌 亲爱的
- Mr. Who Legs? - Set the table, sweetie.
那么
So...
你和希拉决定好怎么处理我的未来了吗
have you and Sheila come to any conclusions about my future?
还没 加里
Not yet, Gary.
该死 我们只有番茄汤
Damn it! All we have is tomato soup.
番茄汤和千层面不能一起上
You can't serve tomato soup with lasagna.
还没做好
It's just not done!
你还好吗
You all right?
有人需要聊天了
I see a man that needs to talk.
没事
I'm fine.
最近几天我就想搭书架
All I wanted to do the last couple days was build bookshelves.
我这是逗谁呢
But who am I kidding?
希拉这样子 我再也做不了正常的事了
With Sheila's situation, I'm never gonna do normal things again.
嗯 她的改变对我影响也很大
Yeah. Her change has had a big effect on me too.
问问我是怎么影响的
Ask me how.
不用了 我能看到
No, I see that.
听着 你们两个很棒 真的
Look, you two are awesome, really.
互相倾听 一起做决定
You listen to each other. You make decisions together.
我从来没有过 或许永远也不会有
I've never had that. I may never have it.
你可说不好 你可以
Dude, you don't know that. You could, uh...
-我打断你了 -没错 希拉有很多事
- Anyway, I interrupted you. - Sure, Sheila's got a lot going on.
她的生活永远会比你重要 就像
Her life's always gonna be bigger than yours. It's like...
就像娶了英国女王一样
It's like being married to the Queen of England.
-不完全是那样 -可以从两个角度看
- It's not exactly like that. - You got two ways of looking at it.
要么是"我的需求永远排第二位"
Either it's, "My needs are always gonna come second"
要么是"老天 我在上英国女王"
or "Jesus Christ, I'm fucking the Queen of England."
感恩你所拥有的吧 哥们
Appreciate what you have, buddy.
别纠结于那些不切实际的目标了
Stop trying to turn it into something it's never gonna be.
谢谢 但我们今晚有客人
Thank you, but we're having dinner guests,
所以我得把你放柜子里 再给你嘴巴塞只袜子
so I gotta put you in the cabinet, stuff a sock in your mouth.
-明白 -好
- Understood. - Okay.
-雷蒙娜 -你好
- Ramona! - Hi.
安妮和丽莎呢
Where are Anne and Lisa?
我妈在做她著名的九层蘸酱
Oh, my mom's finishing making her famous nine-layer dip,
安妮去教堂了
and Anne had a church thing.
不过雷蒙娜永远回到我生活里了
But Ramona's back in my life... forever!
你们又复合了
You guys are together again?
实际上 雷蒙娜希望我过会儿
Uh- huh. In fact, Ramona here wants me to go later
陪她去杀人
with her to kill someone.
-什么 -她说她希望我做你的乔
- What? - She said she wants me to be her Joel.
有人还记得吗
Does that ring any bells for anyone?
-乔 -不
- Joel? - No.
我们今天才去了 跟她说她得更小心
We just went over today and told her she has to be more careful.
对 我们意识到
Yeah, and that we realize
她是多么不容易 因为她孤身一人
how much harder she has it because she's all alone.
没人帮她清理 抬尸体
And doesn't have anyone to help her clean up and carry bodies,
像我为希拉做的那些事
like I do for Sheila.
-我明白了 -我也明白
- Okay, I see what happened. - I hear it too.
雷蒙娜 你不能带上艾瑞克
Ramona, you can't just take Eric.
为什么 他很完美
Why not? He's perfect.
他很小 要是想跑 我能抓住他
He's little, so if he tries to run, I can catch him.
然后我会对他的腿
Then I'll do something small
做点让人难忘的小事 让他再也不敢跑
but memorable to his legs so he won't try it again.
大家听到了吗
Hear that, everyone?
大家听到现在什么情况了吗
Does everyone hear what's happening right now?
失陪下
Excuse me.
-我得去看看千层面 -我也去
- I need to check on the lasagna. - I'll come with you.
-不 -你说得对 厨师太多了
- No. - No, you're right. Too many cooks.
-你在干什么 -我在上英国女王
- What are you doing? - I'm fucking the Queen of England!
-什么 -这是一种措辞
- What? - It's an expression.
意思是不再回望过去
It means no more looking back.
我全押
I'm all in.
我不知道你是怎么到那去的
I don't know how you got there,
但我喜欢你现在身处的地方
but I dig where you're at.
锤刀准备好了 我们去拯救那男生吧
Hammer-knife's ready. Let's save the boy.
艾比 你回你房♥间去 待在里面
Okay, Abby, you go to your room and stay there.