老爸有招

Man with a Plan S03E03

Part 4 April 11, 2020, 12:18 p.m.

we need to have a serious conversation
请趣奇照顾你的事
about you hiring Funchy.
能快点吗
Can we hurry this up?
我把一位坐轮椅的老妇人放在了鸭塘边
I left an old lady in a wheelchair by the duck pond,
她不会一直睡着的
and she is not gonna sleep forever.
但愿吧
I hope.
你为什么提这事
Why are you doing this?
护士的事不是老唐在处理吗
I thought Don was handling the nurse stuff.
老唐转交给我了
Don handed it off to me.
我就知道他会这样
Which I knew he would.
一切都在按照我的计划进行
Oh, this is working out just like I planned.
所以你之前说
Oh, so all that stuff
他是爸爸最喜欢的孩子是想套路他
about him being the favorite was to trick him.
不那部分是真的
No, no, that part's true.
我只是不想先问你怕会伤他的心
I just didn't want to hurt his feelings by asking you first.
太好了现在没人伤心
Well, I'm glad we're not hurting people's feelings.
爸听我说你也清楚
Hey, look, Dad, we all know
膝盖手术肯定会很辛苦
that this knee surgery is gonna be tough,
你肯定会需要人帮助
and you're gonna need some help.
好吧你们总是替我着想
Okay, okay, you're always looking out for me.
我去厨房♥里拿杯喝的
I'm just gonna grab a drink from the kitchen,
然后我们就开始
and then we can get started.
该死看来这招只对小唐好使
Damn, I guess that only works on Donny.
听我说你需要护士
Listen, you need a nurse,
但是没人能跟你吵
but nobody can argue with you,
所以我必须激发你更好的天性
so I'm gonna have to appeal to your better nature.
所以我要请我搭档出手安迪
That's why I'm calling in my teammate, Andi.
我就知道你会找她帮忙
I knew you would ask her to do it.
这家里的一切尽在我掌握之中
I pull all the strings in this family.
不管她说什么
Nothing she says
我都不会改变主意
is gonna change my mind.
我才不要请护士
I'm not getting a damn nurse!
好吧来看看你对一位妈妈的话会是什么反应
Okay, let's just see how you do in the hands of a mom.
乔
Joe.
我很爱你我希望你能让我骄傲
I love you, and I just... just want you to make me proud.
怎么你是我少年棒球联盟的教练吗
What are you, my Little League coach?
我相信你内心也愿意试试看的
I believe you have it in you to try this,
因为你是我认识最勇敢的人
because, well, you're the bravest man I know.
-这话很有说服力因为是实话 -对
- That's powerful because it's true. u202d- Yeah.
你也知道请护士的唯一理由
And you know the real reason to get a nurse
是想帮贝芙减轻负担
is to lighten the load for Bev,
我知道你愿意为你的妻子奉献一切的
and I know you'd do anything for your wife.
好吧我请个护士
Fine, I'll have a nurse.
不许反悔太棒了搞定
No take-backs. Ha! We got him.
但我不会对他很好的
But I won't be nice to him.
真好拿到这份工作我好开心哦
Oh, yay! I'm so glad I got this job.
我告诉你这份工作不好做
Let me tell you, this isn't gonna be easy.
他最近很易怒
He's been real touchy
因为他的大♥麻♥贩子退休去了奥兰多
since his pot guy retired to Orlando.
那是药用大♥麻♥ 我是用来治疗青光眼的
It was medical marijuana. I only used it for my glaucoma
以及抵御你妈妈的无聊故事
and your mother's boring stories.
我也很喜欢维他命大♥麻♥的效果
I, too, am a big believer in Vitamin Weed.
我告诉你如果我是你的护士
You should know, if I'm your nurse,
毒品检测我肯定过不了
I won't be able to pass a drug test.
不过好消息是
The good news is,
你也过不了
neither will you.
这人不错
I like him.
但是你不许用测婴儿的方式测我的体温
But no taking my temperature the baby way.
我不知道这些按钮有什么用但是你输了
I don't know what these buttons do, but I just knocked you out.
趣奇
Hey, Funchy.
你怎么来了他还没做手术呢
What are you doing here? He hasn't had his surgeries yet.
我给他带了点术前药物
I brought him a little pre-op medicine,
你懂我意思吧
if you know what I mean.
我从人行道上就闻到你的意思了
I could smell what you mean from the sidewalk.
你为什么打给我
Why did you call me?
浴室地漏里有一坨头发
There's a hair ball in my shower drain,
我听说你很擅长解决这个
I hear you are good at fixing that.
-没问题我先去拿杯喝的 -好
- Well, no problem, let me just get a drink first. - Yeah.
这套路太完美了
It's the perfect trick.