脆莓公园（2012）

Brickleberry S02E03

Part 2 Oct. 11, 2025, 7:31 p.m.

并把我的管理权下放给Ethel
and I am passing on my executive duties to Ethel.
Ethel?
Ethel?
Woody 我可不止能...
Woody, I am more than capable of...
明智之选 Woody
Great choice, Woody.
我会让整个公园高效运转而且别指望我小中风
The Park will be so much more efficient, and I won't mini-stroke
因为我能对工作带来的压力进行自我调节
out because I can actually deal with the pressures of the job.
你说什么? 我能自我调节
What? I can deal with it!
我啥都调节得了你个...
I can deal with anything, you...
要心无旁骛 Woody
Mind your Chakras, Woody.
不要在通往宁静的路上迷途哦
Don't stray from your cosmic pathway.
这是我一辈子拉得最畅快的一泡屎了
Ah, this is the most relaxing poop I have ever taken.
你们俩就不能换个地儿办事吗?
Any chance you could do that somewhere else?
Astral说这里充盈的能量最多
Astral says this spot has the best energy.
Malloy 我希望我们俩能交个朋友
Malloy, I'm hoping that we can be friends.
滚粗怪胎
[Bleep] off, weirdo.
Malloy - 抱歉
Malloy! - Sorry.
请滚粗怪胎
Please [Bleep] off, weirdo.
我真的很喜欢你 Malloy
I really like you, Malloy
我给你画了幅画就让它作为连接我们友谊的桥梁吧
and as a gesture of our new friendship, I painted this for you.
看上去就像有人在油布上放过大号♥
That looks like someone took a shit on a canvas.
不错 Malloy 你的眼力挺好
Bingo, Malloy. You got a good eye.
但这幅象征艺术作品不会是我们家唯一的新客人
But this scat art isn't the only new addition to our home.
Astral要搬来和我们一起住 - 什么?
Astral's moving in with us. - What?
别担心你甚至都不会觉得她住进来了
Don't worry, you won't even notice she's here.
好爽
Oh, boy!
她... 是不是... 很棒?
Isn't... she... great?
猜怎么着她简直就是把水枪
Guess what. She's a squirter.
就像在哈莱姆区开消防车兜风一样
It's like going down on a fire hydrant in Harlem.
哈莱姆区: 纽约黑人区
她恨不得要把我的水给吸干了
She could break up a riot with that thing.
一会见小水枪
See you later, squirt.
你到这儿来做什么? 把那胖子给榨干了?
What are you doing here? Is the chubby chase over?
Woody睡觉了
Woody is asleep.
我只是想让你知道我已经是他生活的一部分了
I just wanted to let you know that I'm part of his life now.
我们是灵魂伴侣你应该接受这一点
We are soul mates and you should accept that.
你以为你是他的第一个女朋友吗? 真是天真
Oh, you think you're his first girlfriend. That's cute.
你看之前他泡过不少妞但最后都是殊途同归
See, he's had many, but it always ends the same way.
Malloy Jolene做的晚餐美味不?
Malloy, isn't this a nice meal that Jolene made?
一会见亲爱的
Mwah. See you later, honey.
她摸你哪里了? 在洋娃娃上指出来
Where did she touch you? Point it out on the doll!
就在那里
Right there.
还捏了好几下
A lot.
很快你也将被历史尘封蠢货
And you'll be history soon too, asshole.
你的名字是这样叫的吧? "蠢货"
That is how you pronounce your name right? "Asshole".
我和别人不一样
Well, I'm not like the others.
你会发现我不是个好对付的主
You won't get rid of me so easily.
你从哪来的自信?
And why is that?
命运让Woody和我相逢
Destiny brought Woody and I together!
没人能斩断我和他的红线
Nobody's gonna get in the way of our love
你要敢捣乱别特么怪我不客气
and if you try, I will [Bleep] kill you!
很高兴我们能进行畅聊
Well, I'm glad we had this talk.
你给我走着瞧疯婆娘
I'll show that psycho bitch.
你说什么来着?
What did you say?
我说我爱你哟妈咪
I said I love you, Mom.
美好又无忧的一天开始了
Ooh, beautiful, stress-free day.
我可饿坏了
I'm starving.
昨晚肯定燃烧掉了不少卡路里
Must have been from burning all those calories last night.
早安呀 Malloy
Oh, good morning, Malloy.
你眼睛怎么了? - 你女朋友打...
Hey, what happened to your eye? - Your girlfriend hit...
在头上扎钉子的时候提醒我不要打自己的眼睛
The nail on the head when she told me I shouldn't punch myself in the eye.
好吧我小可爱说的话从来没错
Well, my little honey pot gives good advice.
蛋煎好咯
Oh, eggs are done.
Woody 你女朋友就是个... - 水枪? 我当然知道
Woody, your girlfriend's a... - Squirter? Don't I know it.
就像舔一头白鲸的气孔一样爽
It's like licking Moby Dick's blowhole.
是啊你的女朋友是把水枪我就是想这样说
Yes, you're girlfriend's a squirter. That's what I was trying to say.
不她有毛病她威胁说要灭了我
No, she's insane. She threatened to kill me.
有毛病? - 闭嘴
Insane? - Shut up.
好吧我知道你的意思了
Oh, I know what you're doing.
你想让老爹围着你一人转 - 我可没这个意思
You want your Daddy all to yourself. - That's not what I'm doing.
她对我说她要半夜来我的房♥间...
She told me she's gonna come into my room in the middle of the night...
...帮我盖被被就像亲生妈咪一样
And tuck me in, like a real Mom.
先生太酷啦
Wow, Mister. That is so cool!
这就算酷了么? 看看这个
Oh, you think that's cool? Check this out.
就说这招更帅吧
I told you it was cool.
学前班郊游居然没人挂掉?
Pre-school field trip, and not a single fatality?
真是耳目一新我只是尽责做好工作啦
Oh, how refreshing. Just doing my job.
林警警长Ethel 通话完毕
Head Ranger Ethel, over and out.
干得不错啊 Ethel
Ah, good job, Ethel.
谢谢你啦 Ethel
Oh, thank you, Ethel.
Connie 我要你帮忙 Woody的女朋友是个疯婆娘
Connie, I need your help. Woody's girlfriend is bat-shit crazy.
她对我挺好呀恐怕是你嫉妒了吧
She seemed nice to me. Maybe you're just jealous.
我嫉妒那你就是...
Yeah, and maybe you're just...
唉我连吐槽你的精力都没了
Ugh, I don't even have the energy to insult you.
去秤上看看你又长肥没
Just step on a scale.
丹麦面点都去哪儿啦? 今天是"熊爪饼星期三"啊
Where's all the danish? It's bear claw Wednesday!
现在变成"鲜果星期三"了
Now it's fresh fruit Wednesday.
这垃圾吃起来一点儿都不像甜甜圈
Ugh! This doesn't taste anything like a doughnut!
什么破玩意
I hate it!
嘿老娘还半口没吃呢
Hey, I didn't get to eat yet!
算了没关系
Uh, but it's okay.
我的信条是"正能量增效率"
My motto is "efficiency through positivity".
我们齐心协力的话必定能大有所成
By working together, we can achieve greatness.
失陪一下应该是很重要的事
Sorry, probably really important.
脆莓国家公园我是警长Ethel
Brickleberry National Park. Head Ranger Ethel speaking.
公园的开支报告迟交了?
The Park expense reports are late?
我们要写报告的? 我马上动手
We have those? I'll get right on that.
对不起您先别挂断
Sorry, can you hold?
您好我是警长Eth...
Hello, head Ranger Eth...
什么叫"湖里失火了"? 老天呐先别挂
What do you mean the lake's on fire? Oh, my God, hold on.
Ethel 今天我不来上班了我生病啦
Ethel, I can't come to work today, I'm sick.
Denzel 这里需要你
Denzel, I need you here.
你不是又在玩火箭背包吧?
Hey, are you on your jet pack?
没呀
No.
哎看啊有个老黑在天上飞
Hey, look, it's a flying black guy!
可能是我哦
Maybe.
冷静点獾啃掉了你家孩子的脸?
Calm down. A badger ate your baby's face?
请稍等我的紧急频率扫描仪都快响爆了
Hold on. My emergency scanner's going off!
我是Ethel 您有什么紧急情况?
This is Ethel! What's your emergency?
Ethel 我是Steve 你知道Connie害怕生鱼吗?
Ethel, it's Steve. Did you know that Connie is afraid of raw fish?
什么?
What?
我不想说"早跟你说了的"
I don't want to say, "I told you so".
行啊别老叨逼叨因为这火箭背包老好玩儿了
Great, then don't say it, because this jet pack is still awesome.
哇擦
Oh, shit!
还是挺好玩的
Still awesome.
Denzel 这特么什么情况?
Denzel! What the hell did you do?
靠 Ethel 你的正能量都哪儿去啦?
Damn, Ethel. What happened to being positive?
老娘正你个...
I'm positive you're a...
你说得对你对要有正能量
yeah, right, right, positivity.
也许你应付不来警长的差事 Ethel
Maybe you can't handle this, Ethel.
我应付不来? 管理这个公园就是小菜一碟好吧
Maybe I can't handle this? Running this Park is a piece of cake!
哎哟不好
Oh, no!
我居然在这头小象面前说"菜"
I brought up cake in front of the baby elephant!
大家快逃啊
Run!
等一下 Connie 我不是故意的
Wait, Connie, I didn't mean it.
老天别是Steve去啊
Oh, God. Not Steve.
还好还好我刚才好担心
Oh, God, you had me worried.
我还以为你要干蠢事呢
I thought you were gonna do something stupid.
真抱歉让你失望啦 "头儿"
Sorry to disappoint you, "boss".
蠢人不可能又救游客又救狂犬病狼的好吧
I don't think a stupid person saves tourists or rescues rabid wolves.
狼啊
The wolves!
老天救命啊