脆莓公园（2012）

Steve, how much did you spend on all this crap?
800刀咯 - 啥?
$800. - What?
区区小钱只为解我心头之恨 何乐不为?
Small price to pay for revenge, am I right?
是啊...
Yeah, uh...
Steve 我想起来了 我这儿有拖鬼把 要不要来一把?
Steve, that reminds me. I have this ghost mop I want to sell you.
不了 多谢 早买♥♥好了
No, thanks. Already have one.
黄博会
拯救巨♥乳♥协会 硬梆梆硬梆梆
约会传奇 坚挺Rex 是时候引蛇入洞了
直肠直入式大全
屁鼓
那边看《菲律宾大脚恋语5》死胖子的人都排成队了
There's even a line to see the fatties from Filipino Foot Fetish 5!
难以置信 居然没人给我赏脸
I can't believe no one wants to meet me.
太操蛋了 Malloy
Well, this sucks, Malloy.
亲笔签名 每张百刀
那片子还真是匹黑♥马♥
That was a surprisingly solid film
尽管看到最后 你才会发现这只不过是个前传
despite the fact that you didn't realize it was a prequel till the end.
我就是个笑话 不敢相信你把我给哄到这来了
I'm a joke. I can't believe you talked me into coming here.
我的传奇已然终结
My legacy is dead.
乐观点 Woody 看毛♥片♥的撸管男们乐意花点小钱
Cheer up, Woody. These porn nerds are just cheap.
亲笔签名只要10刀了
Autographs now only $10.
1刀就能签名哦
$1.00 autographs.
好吧 没人爱你了 - 耶稣爱我
Okay, no one loves you. - Jesus does!
那你得祈祷他没看《坚挺Rex5: 复活节大淫乱》
Not after he saw the Rex Erection IV Easter [Bleep]day.
女士们先生们 很荣幸向各位...
Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure
介绍这世界上最伟大的黄♥片♥明星
to introduce the biggest porn star in the world!
自♥慰♥棒的教父 爆菊界的巨星 本年度色情奖的志在必得之人
The God of rod, the master ass blaster, the shoe-in for this year's Boney Award!
鸡动公爵
Duke Dick!
恶搞经典游戏毁灭公爵 含有大量色情成分
那家伙抄老子的姿势
Hey, those are my moves!
那是老子的拍屁拨浪鼓 老子的海员撬蛤蜊
That's my Navajo Chap Slap and my Inverted Clam!
那可是老子的提股看花式啊
And that's my Mr. Belvedere!
鸡动公爵要进入战斗位置了
Yo! Duke Dick in the hit zone!
现在是什么时候了? - 是引蛇入洞的时候了
What time is it? - It's time to bust ass!
那可是老子的名言
And that's my catchphrase!
现在谁想见识见识公爵的名招?
Now, who wants to see Duke do his famous move?
飞龙在天
The Duke Rocket!
你给我打住了
Stop right there!
趁公爵控制不住情绪之前 来人把这娘们赶下台去
Someone get this Queen offstage before the Duke gets filled with rage!
你丫抄老子姿势 烂屁♥眼♥的东西
You stole all of my moves, asshole!
烂屁♥眼♥? 我的屁♥眼♥可赢过五项色情大奖
Asshole? My asshole has won five Boney Awards!
给我放尊重点 小子
Show some respect, son!
老子可不是什么小子 小毛孩
Oh, I ain't your son, hombre.
老子是特么坚挺Rex
I'm Rex [Bleep] Erection!
坚挺Rex曾经是我的英雄 直到他告诉我"你不行"
Rex Erection was my hero until he told me I'd never make it.
搞什么...
What the...
亲爱的公爵 你的枪口径太小 好好上学吧 Rex
"Dear Duke, you got a small tool. Stay in school. Rex".
现在傻眼了吧
Well, I showed you.
长江后浪推前浪 你死在沙滩上了 老家伙
Now I'm on top, and you're all washed up, old man.
别高兴得太早 你知道老子要做什么吗?
Not for long, because you know what I'm gonna do?
我哪知道 跟你孙子聊Skype吗?
I don't know. Skype with your grand kids?
错 老子要重出江湖
No, I'm gonna come out of retirement
老子要拍自己的电影 老子要赢色情大奖
I'm gonna make my own movie, I'm gonna win that Boney!
然后把奖杯插到你那坐拥殊荣的后门里去
And then I'm gonna shove it up your award-winning asshole!
是啊 是啊
Yeah, right.
哪个导演会碰你那高端大气上档次的白屁♥股♥?
What Director would touch your washed-up white ass?
我会
I will.
拜托 深山老林里的毛球能导演个毛线
Dude, a hairy little woodland creature can't direct a movie.
是吗 那彼得•杰克逊呢?
Uh, what about Peter Jackson?
新西兰导演 身高1.69米 曾执导《指环王》《金刚》《霍比特人》等
好吧 算我说错了
Okay, I stand corrected.
好了 Malloy 我吃了四罐艾力达
Alright Malloy, I snorted four lines of Levitra.
口服性功能障碍治疗药物
子弹已经上膛 就等号♥令开火了
There's soup in the mushroom! Let's shoot this thing!
先别急着性奋 我还在选女演员呢
Put a pin in that boner. I'm still auditioning actresses.
Connie 都带进来
Connie, bring them in!
太肥 胳膊太粗 屁♥股♥太平 那是头驯鹿
Too fat, trucker arms, flat ass. That's a Moose.
拜托 Connie 给我找点有血有肉没自尊的女人好不
Christ! Connie, bring me some real women with no self-esteem.
抱歉 Malloy 我真累得够呛
Sorry, Malloy, I'm just really tired.
我也累得够呛了 让你这头只会打哈哈的海象给我当助理
I'm really tired too... of having a wheezing elephant seal for an assistant.
又不是我要给你当助理的
I never actually asked to be your assistant.
Connie 永远别特么顶我的嘴
Connie, don't ever [Bleep] backtalk me.
我错了
I'm so sorry.
靠 你又哪根筋抽了?
Oh, God. What is this now?
三♥级♥片♥? 滚粗
你知不知道这对女性是多大的侮辱?
Do you have any idea how demeaning this is to women?
所以呢
Yes.
但不 我不会让你演的
And, no, you cannot be in it.
打死我也不想演这部电影
I would never be in this movie.
等等 为什么不能让我演?
Wait, why can't I be in this movie?
你不会是觉得我胳膊粗吧 对吧?
You don't think I have trucker arms, do you?
我鼻子太大了? 还是胸太小了?
It is my nose? Are my boobs too small?
你知道不? 我才不会中你的激将法呢
You know what? I'm not gonna fall into your little trap.
快特么让我演这部电影
You put me in this goddamn movie!
让我演
Put me in!
Malloy 让我演电影
Malloy, put me in this movie!
好吧 但我不会给你发钱
Fine, but I'm not gonna pay you.
Yes 让姐觉得风韵犹存
Yes, I'm pretty.
那么你是说幽灵唯一没有骚扰你的那次
So you're saying the only time the ghost didn't bother you
正是你老爸蹲号♥子的那四个月?
was during the four weeks your daddy was in jail?
是啊 我想那幽灵肯定是忙着诬告我老爸醉驾了
Yeah, I guess he was too busy framing my dad for all those DUI's.
你给咱俩订披萨了? - 不是 是灵媒
Ooh, you ordered us a pizza? - No, it's a medium.
那你只给自己订披萨了? - 不是 我给咱俩找了个灵媒
So, you ordered yourself a pizza? - No, I got us a medium.
所以一张披萨得分成三块吃?
Oh, so we only get three slices a piece?
那你丫至少有加订点面包条什么的吧?
You at least get some bread sticks or some shit?
不对 Denzel 我找了个灵媒来帮咱们捉鬼
No, Denzel, a medium to help us hunt down this ghost.
披萨怎么可能捉鬼 Steve?
How's a pizza gonna hunt down a ghost, Steve?
你好 我是... - 别别别别
Hi, I'm St... - No, no, no, no, no.
不用自我介绍 且让我来解读你
Don't tell me about yourself. I'll tell you about yourself.
你喜欢吃糖 - 好准
You like to eat candy. - Yes!
你没有女朋友 - 没错儿
You don't have a girlfriend. - No!
你叫我来 是为了得到某种东西的...
And you brought me here for some information on...
信息
Some subject.
我滴天爷 太对啦 我想找的是一只恶鬼
Oh, my God, yes! I'm looking for an evil ghost.
你觉得他会在哪儿?
Where do you think he is?
坟地吧...
Oh! The graveyard.
老子就知道
I knew it!
Steve 你没看出来这女人在耍你嘛?
Steve, can't you see this woman's playing you?
全特么扯淡
This is bullshit!
哟 有个不信邪的 让我与灵界稍微沟通一下
Oh, a non-believer. Let me go check in with the other side.
我感应到...
I'm sensing...
你祖奶奶经常错念词 比如"图猪馆" 还有"卫森间"
Your Grandmother mispronounces words like libary and bafroom.
我勒个擦
Holy shit!
能为您效劳吗? 我是本精♥子♥银行的CEO 今天我们很忙呐
Can I help you? I'm the CEO of this sperm bank, and we are very busy today.
您还得多费心 因为我想借贷精♥子♥
Well, you're going to get even busier because I need a loan.
我完全可以满足你 直接JJ贷就成
Ooh, I can give you a loan. A loan bone.
停 台词是"借贷JJ"
Cut! The line is bone loan.
"JJ贷"是毛线玩意儿?
What the hell is a loan bone?
我完全不能理解我的角色
I'm having a real problem understanding my character.
他想打炮
He wants to have sex.
那动机是什么呢? - 打炮啊
Well, what's his motivation? - To have sex.
那他童年时代过得幸福不?
Well, did he have a happy childhood?
赶快脱♥光♥衣服 狠狠 [哔-] 她 [哔-] 的 [哔-] 就行了
Just take off your clothes and [Bleep] her in her [Bleep] [Bleep].
说啥呢? 老哔哔响我没听清
What? I couldn't hear you over all the beeps.
餐饮后勤组
不好意思 我在微波牛肉卷
Sorry. I was making Taquitos in the microwave.
来人 查查他有绿卡没
Can someone check his green card?
你特么这是要去哪儿?
And where the hell do you think you're going?
我啊? 我去吃个午饭 让我的裸替来接♥班♥
Me? Oh, I'm just gonna go grab lunch while my, uh, body double steps in.
慢着 你不会是要我本尊全♥裸♥出镜吧?
Wait, you didn't think I was gonna do a nude scene, did you?
如果我要找的是不露咪♥咪♥的三流女演员
If I wanted a shitty actress who wouldn't show her tits
我不如去雇Kevin James
I would have hired Kevin James.
美国男演员 代表作美剧《后中之王》
我才不要受你这糟心气呢 Malloy
Oh, I don't have to take this from you, Malloy.
老娘不干了 - 哎哟别啊 哪里有人能替代你呀?
I quit! - Oh, no! How will I ever replace you?
老子拿俩桔子粘拖把上就能搞定
I could just glue two oranges to a mop.
你会后悔的