脆莓公园（2012）

这事算搞定了
That's done.
啊? 你来这儿干嘛?
What? What are you doing here?
Krog爱你 我们 终身伴侣
Krog love. We mate for life.
你说些什么胡话啊 Krog?
What you talking about, Krog?
我的兄弟姐♥妹♥们♥ 要想得救 先得解囊
My chillins, if you want to heal, you've got to give.
花钱花到肉疼才能得救
You gotta give till it hurts!
必须要疼到你嗷嗷叫
You gotta give until you say, "ow!"
熊孩子才不需要圣诞节 圣诞节是魔鬼瞎编的
Your kids don't need Christmas. The Devil made up Christmas!
大学学位对于心灵救赎有个毛用
What's a college education got on spiritual rejuvenation?
物质消费都是邪恶的
Ooh, all material things are evil!
除了耶稣号♥专机 这才是好东西
Except for the Jesus jet, which is awesome!
兄弟姐♥妹♥们♥啊 治愈时间已到
Oh, brothers and sisters, it's healing time!
谁先来?
Who's first?
我 我 选我
Me, me! Pick me!
这里有个兔唇男 重复一遍 兔唇男
We've got a harelip here. I repeat, a harelip.
这货可是大金矿 喜感十足的大金矿
This guy is a gold mine. A hilarious gold mine.
孩子 你叫什么名字?
And what is your name, my son?
"饼"吉明 "咪"普曼
Menjamin Mippman.
他说他叫作肉桂小饼干
His name is Cinnamon Biscuit.
以上帝和梅尔•吉布森电影赐予我的神力
By the power vested in me by God! And Mel Gibson's movies!
电影演员 导演 制片人 代表作《勇敢的心》《爱国者》
我就此宣布 你的病治好了
I now pronounce you healed!
有效果没? - 搞毛... 你再一次被治好了
Oh, did it nerk? - What the...? You're healed again!
这次有用没?
Did it nerk nat nime?
快痊愈啊 快好啊 你个兔唇崽子
Heal, heal, you harelipped son of a bitch!
给我痊愈
Heal!
肉桂哥 你还好吗?
Uh, Cinnamon, you okay?
小饼干先生 小饼干先生
Mr. Biscuits? Mr. Biscuits!
太好啦 真管用呀 我的兔唇不见啦
Oh, great, it worked that time. My harelip is gone.
看 我都能好好说话啦
See? I can speak normal now.
听起来再也不会奇怪了
I don't sound ridiculous no more.
赞美耶稣 又一个奇迹
Praise Jesus! Another miracle!
他偷了我们的钱 抓住他
He stole our money! Get him!
你们要干嘛?
What are you doing?
嘿 别
Hey! No!
不至于 大伙
Come on, man!
诸位 拜托
People, please.
怎能如此对待上帝的使者呢?
Is this any way to treat a man of God?
要是人们对耶稣下此狠手 你们怎么想?
Yeah, what if they had done this to Jesus?
闭你丫的嘴 Steve
Shut the [Bleep] up, Steve.
Woody神父只不过需要
Reverend Woody just needs to
和他的朋友兼生意伙伴上帝同学稍作切商
have a conversation with his friend and business partner, God.
我保证湖水会在短期内恢复营业
I promise the lake will be up and running in no time.
最重要的事是 请各位谨记 没人需要退款
The most important thing to remember is, no one needs a refund.
至少能让我们砸他石头吧?
Can we at least stone his ass?
何乐不为呢? 扔一块十块钱不贵吧?
I don't see why not. Ten bucks a rock sound fair?
你们知道 这事不...
You know, this is not...
听着 Krog 我喜欢你 但...
Now, Krog, I like you, but, uh
我还没准备好开始一段认真的感情
I'm not really ready for a serious relationship.
你拿这些石头骨头干嘛?
What are these rocks and bones for?
慢着 你把你东西都搬我屋了?
Wait, are you moving your stuff in?
你又对我的墙做什么? - Krog重装饰
What are you doing to my walls? - Krog redecorate.
这特么什么玩意儿? 棍子男干仗野水牛?
What the hell is this shit? A stick man fighting a buffalo?
我得呼吸点新鲜空气 - 你不许走
I gotta get some air. - You not go.
永远不许离开Krog
You never leave Krog.
你高兴了嘛 鸡♥巴♥?
Are you happy now, Dick?
我再也不要做这事了 Malloy
I don't want to do this anymore, Malloy.
那些人全都是怪物
Those people are monsters.
嘿 赚钱的贼车不会停的 起来再试下
Hey, this money train ain't stopping. Now, try again.
上帝啊 跪求您还此湖以奇力吧
Oh, God, please return the power to this lake...
看在那些病秧子的面儿上
For the sick people.
看在钱的面儿上 - 他知道钱的事啦 Malloy
And for the money. - He knows about the money, Malloy!
上帝 听得见我吗 上帝?
God! Can you hear me, God?
能 Woody 我能
Yes, Woody, I can.
你才不是上帝 - 确实 但我兼♥职♥扮他
You're not God. - No, but I do play him for a living.
话说回来 传说中的奇迹之湖在哪儿? 让我也沾沾光
Anyway, where's this Miracle Lake I've heard about? I could use a dip.
我得了点超级闹心的梅毒
I've got the most bothersome case of penis pox.
这湖过去就是奇迹之湖来着 但现在不管用了
Well, this used to be Miracle Lake, but she don't work no more.
不会有人想跳进这个湖吧
Oh, you don't want to go in that lake.
我可把医疗垃圾都倒里边了
Why, that's where I dump all my medical waste.
医疗垃圾?
Medical waste?
所以奇迹之湖才会有奇力吗?
So that's the reason this lake had powers?
你特么的往我们家湖里倒医疗垃圾搞毛啊?
Why the hell did you dump medical waste in there anyway?
你给我签了许可呀
Well, you did sign this permit.
我可真不能喝得烂醉还签许可了
I gotta stop getting drunk and signing permits.
感情进展如何呀 洞人上校?
How's it going, Captain Caveman?
不咋地 Krog就一疯子
Not good. Krog's crazy.
一连好几天把我关小木屋里
She had me locked in my cabin for days.
我是拿着原始粗木轮子忽悠她 跳窗户才跑出来的
I had to distract her with a crudely carved wheel and jump out the window.
想不到解冻40万岁的穴居人老太太再跟她做♥爱♥这种事会不灵光
I can't believe thawing out and making love to a 400,000-year-old Neanderthal didn't work out.
写上报纸肯定超叼啊
It looked so good on paper.
Ethel 你得救我啊
Ethel, you've got to help me!
我倒是确实有三个前男友在自然历史博物馆上班啦
Well, I do have three ex-boyfriends who work at the Natural History Museum.
算门卫的话四个呢 他们应该会替你接管她吧
Well, four if you count the janitor. I'm sure they'd take her off your hands.
慢着慢着 等下
Wait, wait, wait. Hold on.
他们不会拿一堆扯鸡♥巴♥淡的外星人实验招呼她吧?
Are they gonna do a bunch of crazy-ass E.T. experiments on her?
没准 - 很好 给我弄死那婊♥子♥
Probably. - Good, [Bleep] that bitch up.
发现她了 一个有生命的穴居活人
There she is! A living, breathing Neanderthal.
各位都小心点哦 她看着蛮壮
We can't be too careful. She looks strong.
等等 先退回去
Wait, wait, back up.
所以你是说 是医疗垃圾让这个湖有奇力的
So you're telling me that it was medical waste that gave this lake its power?
这不明摆着嘛 - 那这事儿就好办了
So it would appear. - Well, there's only one thing to do.
告诉人们真♥相♥ - 使劲往里边倒医疗垃圾
Tell people the truth. - Dump in more medical waste.
对头 我特么秀逗了吧? 真♥相♥你大爷
Yeah. What the hell was I thinking? The truth.
别看我 伙计们 我可是倒没了
Don't look at me, fellows. I'm fresh out.
不过我还留着一份详细的非法倾倒存货清单 以备税务之需
But I do keep a meticulous inventory of my illegal dumping for tax purposes.
干得漂亮
Good thinking.
如果你们重造这组垃圾 应该能收到同样效果
If you recreate the batch, it should have the same effect.
你去哪了? Krog担心死了
Where you been? Krog worried sick.
你咋还在这儿晃悠呢?
Oh, what are you doing here?
应该早变成博物馆展品之类了啊
You're supposed to be stuffed in a museum or some shit.
咋回事嘛?
What happened?
今日惊奇事: 国家公园惊现一史前女性冰冻人
Amazing news today. A prehistoric ice woman was found in a National Park.
科学家计划对其展开一系列疯狂外星人实验
Scientists plan to do a bunch of crazy-ass E.T., experiments on her.
对不起哦 宝贝
Uh, I'm sorry, baby.
不如我补偿你一顿美味晚餐咯?
Oh, how about I make you a fancy dinner?
我去拿饮料... 你去取鱼排
I'll grab the Kool-Aid. You grab the fish sticks.
好嘞 宝贝
Okay, baby.
放我出去 放我出去
Let me out! Let me out!
别着急 等我准备好跟40万岁老太太共度一生 就解冻你
Don't worry. I'll thaw you out when I'm ready for a serious relationship in about 400,000 years
你个神经病克鲁马努婊♥子♥
you crazy-ass cro-magnon bitch.
旧石器时代晚期欧洲的高加索人种
卸车 快点 卸车 卸车 快卸车
Dump it! Hurry, dump it! Dump it! Dump it!
有用了
It's working.
有用了 我们又来啦
It's working! We're back!
听好了 汝等病秧子死屌♥丝
Hear me ye sick and dying losers!
奇迹之湖已重装开业
Miracle Lake is back in business!
让我们大治大愈吧
Let's do a mass healing!
大伙都下水 湖水管用了
Everybody in! The waters fine!
成功了 医生
Well we did it Doc.
想不到我们真能原封不动重造你的医疗垃圾
I can't believe we were able to recreate your medical waste exactly.
话说要找到三磅两盎司的亚美尼亚胎盘可真费劲啊
What are the odds we'd find a three pound two ounce Armenian fetus?
亚美尼亚胎盘? 看我这操蛋手写字
Armenian fetus? Oh drat my sloppy handwriting.
我写的是两磅三盎司的伊朗胎盘
That says two pound three ounce Iranian fetus.
伊朗 亚美尼亚 能有几个区别啦?
Iranian, Armenian, what difference could it make?
奇迹发生了
It's a miracle!
你们都做了什么? 这些人...
What did you do? All these people are...
Malloy 这玩意儿不能让人满血复活了
Malloy, it doesn't heal people anymore.
嗯 我知道
Yeah, I know.