脆莓公园（2012）

把枪留下 - 好吧
Leave the gun! - Fine!
Connie 我很抱歉...
Connie, I'm sorry...
Donnie 道歉这事我不大擅长 但是...
Donnie, I'm not good at this apology stuff, but...
我对说你基♥督♥不容这事很抱歉 或许等你再长大点 你和...
I'm sorry I said you were the antichrist. Maybe when you grow up a little, you and...
接受道歉
Apology accepted.
多谢 Donnie 你可真大度 等等 你会说话?
Oh, thanks, Donnie. You're pretty cool. Wait, you can talk?
Denzel 我要撕掉你的小鸡鸡 把它喂给地狱的恶魔们
Denzel, I'm going to rip out your dick and feed it to the demons of hell!
♪ 谁是我的萌宝宝? ♪
♪ Oh, who's my cute baby? ♪
♪ 你就是我的萌宝宝 ♪
♪ You're my cute baby! ♪
♪ 我爱我的萌宝宝 因为他是萌宝宝 ♪
♪ I love my cute baby, because he's a cute baby! ♪
♪ 萌 萌 萌 萌 宝宝 宝宝 萌 ♪
♪ Cute, cute, cute, cute, baby, baby, cute! ♪
♪ 我爱他 萌 ♪
♪ Love him! Cute! ♪
他说他要撕下我的小鸡鸡去喂魔鬼
He said he was going to rip my dick off and feed it to a Demon.
他就是个天杀的恶魔 - 是真的吗? 听起来好可怕噢
He the goddamn antichrist! - Seriously? That sounds horrifying!
我准备吃热狗的
I'm about to eat a Hot Pocket
你要在我放进微波炉前 检查一下它是不是魔王的化身吗?
you want to double-check it's not Beelzebub before I pop it in the microwave?
热狗
Hot Pocket!
你真胖 - 好吧 那又怎么解释?
You're fat! - Okay, then why does that happen?
这里面的科学道理很简单 Denzel
There's a simple scientific explanation, Denzel.
很明显 地下水里的杀虫剂浓度很高
Clearly, pesticides have built up in the groundwater.
那又有什么科学道理吗?
And how does science explain that shit?
有很多鸟类疾病会导致鸟在迁徙途中死亡
There are several avian disorders that can cause birds to die mid-flight.
是嘛? 那这个又怎么解释?
Oh, yeah? Well, what about that?
快看 是一个太阳圈 中间还有颗幸运星呢
Hey, look! It's a sunny circle and a happy star!
听起来不错嘛 - 老天 拜托
That sounds about right. - Aw, come on!
你可以和我一起呆在避难所里 小毛球
You can stay with me in the bunker, cubsie wubsie.
其他人都会在岩浆的烈焰中烧死
Everyone else will die in a firestorm of lava.
搬个家不就行了吗 你这天杀的疯子
Why don't we just move, you [Bleep] maniac!
就是这儿了 俺们的最高机密避难所
And voo-la! Our top secret bunker.
真树
这是通往避难所的电梯吗?
So is this the elevator to the bunker?
你确定这玩意扛得住火山?
Are you sure this thing is volcano-proof?
它什么都扛得住
Oh, it's everything-proof.
它扛得住僵尸 吸血鬼 巨龙...
Keeps out zombies, draculas, dragons...
还有犹太人
And Jews.
真棒 简直就像做梦一样
Hot dog! It's like a dream come true!
只要大门一关 外边的人就永远都开不了这门了
And once this door is closed, it can't ever be opened from the outside.
永远都不 俺是说 永远都不
Ever. I mean, ever.
入口
糟了 Booby 我想我们把门给装反了
Uh oh, Bobby. I think we put the door on backwards.
卧♥槽♥ 你是说我们永远都别想出去了?
Holy shit! You mean we're trapped in here forever?
不 不是永远 直到俺们死了那天
Oh, no, not forever. Just till we die.
谢谢你的鼓舞 你这头蠢驴
Well, thanks for boosting my spirits, [Bleep]Face!
Steve 你是我最好的朋友
Steve, you're my best friend.
就信我一次 让我揭穿那孩子的真面目
Just give me a chance to prove what that baby really is.
别再这样啦 - 拜托 Steve
Not this again. - Come on, Steve!
Donnie出生的那天 那火山刚好喷发
This volcano blew its top on the day Donnie was born.
这是末日的征兆啊 看看那火山四周的云吧
It's a sign of the apocalypse! Look at the clouds around it!
我只看到一头开飞机的大象还有...
All I see is an elephant flying an airplane and...
等等 那是什么? 一头有奶♥子♥的长颈鹿
Wait, what's that? A giraffe with titties.
见鬼 你个傻缺 Steve
Damn, you stupid, Steve.
早安 Connie 孩子怎么样了?
Hey, Connie. How's the baby?
我发现Donnie确实和别的孩子不一样
I've come to realize that Donnie is different from other babies.
是时候了 我们得宰了...
It's about time! We gotta kill...
他有天赋 他很聪明 他喜欢把早教节目倒着播
He's gifted! He's so smart, he likes watching baby Einstein videos backwards.
看着
Look.
杀 杀 杀
Kill, kill, kill.
撒...撒旦
Sa... sa-tan.
撒旦 我可爱的撒旦
Satan. My sweet Satan.
说来也怪 Donnie教会我的东西一点不比我教会他的少
It's weird. I learn as much from Donnie as he learns from me.
就在今天 他用阿♥拉♥姆语给我教圣经呢
Like today, he's been teaching me Biblical Aramaic!
汝等都将在绝望中痛苦地死去
Al es-bataar qumran iskatu rakanoth!
他是不是又可爱又聪明?
Isn't he the cutie-wutest?
那么 Connie?
So, um, Connie?
你到底是怎样怀上这孩子的?
How exactly was this baby conceived?
就是标准的人工授精
It was a pretty standard artificial insemination.
好吧 亲爱的 只要一会就结束了
Okay, my dear, this won't take a minute.
撒旦万岁 让吾等沐浴于烈焰之中
Ave satanas! Sanguis bibimus!
我勒个大去 你们不是在玩我 对吧?
Oh, hell, no. You guys are messing with me, right?
谢谢你们的到访 但我得花时间奶Donnie了
Thanks for coming by, but I gotta feed Donnie now.
闲人免进 滚 此地不是防空洞
那么说我们下半辈子都得困在这里了?
So we're stuck down here the rest of our lives?
至少你老得黄土埋半截了 我还是幼熊咧
At least you're old and near death. Think of me.
这下可好 我们该怎么办呢?
Great! What are we supposed to do now?
繁衍后代嘛 谁先上?
Repopulate the Earth! Who wants some?
还有其它选项吗?
Anything else we can do?
我倒是装了一个娱乐中心
I did install an activity center.
美国桌游
谁想玩"骚瑞"棋?
Who wants to play sorry?
Bobby 里面没棋子
Uh, Bobby? All the pieces are missing.
老天爷 你逗我玩呢吧
Damn you, Goodwill!
你们两个逗逼气得我大肠激躁症都犯了
Oh, you two Morons are really firing up my irritable bowel syndrome.
这个破烂棚子的茅坑在哪?
Now where's the shitter in this tootincommon tool shed?
就在那...
Oh, it's right over...
日 厕所到底在哪?
Shit! Where is the bathroom?
安装在吊柜顶部的板材 用于装饰美化厨柜效果和安装射灯
记得不 Bobby 你当时决定装天花线
Well, remember, Bobby, you decided to go with the crown molding
就没装厕所
instead of the toilet.
总有人得考虑转卖♥♥价格的嘛
Well, somebody's gotta think about resale value.
没厕所? 我憋不住了
No bathroom? I've got to go!
试试别老是想着 来 吃点零食
Try to take your mind off of it. Here, have a snack.
我们存了梅干 咖啡 回锅豆
We got prunes, coffee, refried beans.
咱们的甜点是超劲泻药巧克力
And for dessert we got them chocolate ex-lax candies.
底特律圣洁会
对不起啊 之前我不信你 Denzel - 甭放心上
Sorry I doubted you, Denzel. - Don't sweat it.
我们找个帮忙的就能行 Vernon牧师?
We just need some help from... Preacher Vernon?
反基♥督♥徒降临了 和你预言的一样
The antichrist has come, just like you said.
我说过这话? - 貌似说过吧
I said that? - Uh, kind of.
我们该怎么办?
What should we do?
我来看看蛇们有何反应
Let me see what the snakes say.
这一条好喜欢咬 放回去好了
Oh, he like to bite. Gotta put him back.
蛇们说... 我们要举♥行♥个驱魔仪式
They say... we got to do a exorcism.
你说搞驱魔?
Did you say exorcism?
我不知道诶 我经常蛇毒上脑 头脑不清楚
I don't know. I got a lot of snake venom related brain malfunction.
我这是在哪? 谁在我裤裆里放的蛇?
Where am I? Who put these snakes in my pants?
♪ 王老先生有块地 咿呀咿呀哟 ♪
♪ Old MacDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O! ♪
♪ 他在田边养小... ♪
♪ And on this farm, he had a... ♪
鬼 - 小鬼?
Cacodaemon. - Cacodaemon?
行吧
Okay.
♪ 小鬼叫... ♪
♪ With a... ♪
♪ 这儿叫... ♪
♪ Here, and a... ♪
♪ 那儿叫... 这儿叫... ♪
♪ There. Here a... There a... ♪
♪ 到处都叫... ♪
♪ Everywhere a... ♪
♪ 王老先生有块地 ♪
♪ Old MacDonald had a farm. ♪
♪ 咿呀咿呀 ♪
♪E-I-E-I... ♪
♪ 哟 ♪
♪ O! ♪
恶魔之子喜欢唱王老先生 就跟《圣经》里说的一模一样
Oh, antichrists love old MacDonald. Just like it say in the Bible.
好 我们准备了圣水 尖木桩
Okay. We got holy water, sharpened stakes,
还有准备让他签名的《鬼玩人3》
and a DVD of Evil Dead 3 for him to sign.
万事俱全
We ready.
但是咱们仨能打赢魔界王子的机率有多大?
But what chance do the three of us have against the Prince of evil?
咱们四个 我加入
The four of us. I'm in.
你不是只相信科学吗?
I thought you only believed in science.
以前信 后来我帮忙照顾了下小Donnie
Oh, I did, then I babysat little Donnie.
他吐出了一只大蜥蜴蝠
He puked up a giant lizard bat
然后说我妈在地狱里专职做口♥活♥
then said something about my mom sucking [Bleep] in hell.
去他♥娘♥的♥科学 咱们驱死这王八犊子
[Bleep] Science. Let's exorcise that bitch!
好嘞 大家都来抓条蛇
All right! Everybody grab a snake!
妹子 那条黑色独眼蛇随便抓
Now lady, feel free to grab the one-eyed black one
但你可别瞎碰我JJ啊
but don't you dare touch my penis.
那可是属于耶稣的
That belong to Jesus.
嗨 Connie 我...
Hi, Connie, I...
现在是小Donnie的午睡时间
It's little Donnie's nap time.