牧场趣事（2016）

杀牛就不用亲自动手了
the second one just takes care of itself.
你可不是个轻言放弃的人
You're not one to give up easy.
你♥爸♥说你被20支球队拒绝过
Your dad said you were cut from 20 different teams.
就是说你19次
That's 19 times you didn't
都没信别人说你不行
believe someone who told you you were shitty.
是的女士 - 那就行了
Yes, ma'am. - All right, then.
那你振作起来吧
How about you get your shit together?
好的女士
Yes, ma'am.
感谢你能跟我聊聊
I appreciate the talk with me.
最近挺糟心的 但我觉得你说的对
It's been a rough go, but I think you're right.
我不会再喝酒了
I'm gonna get sober again.
嘿 海瑟 谢谢你能来
Hey, Heather, thanks for coming.
好吧 出什么事了
Okay, what the hell is going on?
你给我发了十条短♥信♥
You sent me ten text messages.
"911 紧急情况 来我住的小木屋"
"911. This is an emergency. Come to my cabin."
"这不是约炮 除非你有兴趣"
"This is not a booty call. Unless you're down."
我不想用短♥信♥跟你说这事儿 可是 天啊
I didn't wanna send it to you in a text, but, man...
关于尼克你说的对 他是个疯子
You're right about Nick. That guy's fucking crazy.
出什么事了
What happened?
尼克私闯进我家了
Nick broke into my house.
我回到家发现他正坐在我家沙发上
I come home, and he's sitting on my couch
像个乡巴佬雕像一样
like a hillbilly gargoyle.
什么 - 可不是嘛
What the fuck? - Yeah.
他走运 我的师♥父♥教过我要克制
He's lucky my sensei taught me some restraint.
这事儿你告诉我♥干♥什么 你告诉我妈了吗
Why are you telling me? Have you told my mom?
没有
No.
我担心要是尼克知道我打电♥话♥或是发短♥信♥给她 他会乱来
I'm afraid if I call or text your mom, Nick's gonna see it and freak out.
你能告诉她吗
Will you talk to her?
我很担心 我想确定她没事
I'm worried. I wanna make sure she's okay.
当然了 我会跟她说的 那你呢 你没事吧
Yeah, of course, I'll talk to her. What about you? You all right?
没事 不用担心我 我能照顾自己
Yeah, you ain't gotta worry about me. I can take care of myself.
肯尼切斯尼
Kenny Chesney!
你喊的是"肯尼切斯尼"吗
Did you say, "Kenny Chesney"?
我把能想到的最有力的话喊了出来
I channeled the most powerful thing I could think of.
我会跟我妈说的
Ugh. I'll talk to my mom.
那好
All right.
谢谢
Thank you.
谢谢你再次抽空见我 诺依曼女士
Thanks for meeting with me again, Ms. Neumann.
这要成习惯了
This is becoming a bit of a habit.
是啊
Yeah.
抱歉
Sorry about that.
你看到了 我把帽子拿在手里
Uh, as you see, I come hat in hand,
这对我来说挺重要的 因为我头发很乱
which is a big deal for me, 'cause my hair is a mess.
我刚试了款新的护发素
I rolled the dice on a new conditioner.
还真是多谢了 查理兹塞隆
Thanks a lot, Charlize Theron.
这是野马队的用球吗 - 是的
Is that a Broncos football? - Yep.
上面有全队的签名
Signed by the whole team.
太酷了 上面还有地方
That's awesome. You got a little blank space there.
拜托别在我的这个球上签名 柯尔特
Please don't sign my football, Colt.
这话我不是第一次听了
Not the first time I heard that.
所以有什么我能帮你的
So, what can I do for you?
我知道你想买♥♥彼得森牧场
I know you want to buy the Peterson Ranch.
我妻子现在正怀着我们的第一个孩子
My wife's pregnant with our first kid.
我一直梦想着能在那间牧场成家立业
It's always been my dream to raise our family on that ranch.
你前面已经帮了我们很多了 - 好吧
You've done a lot for us already-- - Okay.
我要就此打断你的话了 柯尔特
Let me stop you right there, Colt.
这是个商业决策
This is a business decision.
你♥爸♥要卖♥♥那间牧场
Your dad wants to sell that ranch
就算我不买♥♥ 也会有其他人买♥♥
and if I don't buy it, someone else will.
而且很抱歉这叫你很难接受 但是
And I'm sorry if this is hard for you, but...
嘿 你想在这个球上签名吗
Hey, do you wanna sign this ball?
我不是叫你不要买♥♥
I don't want to stop you from buying that ranch.
我只是 等这笔买♥♥卖♥♥确定之后 我想替你经营这间牧场
I just... When the deal's closed, I wanna run it for you.
真的吗
Really?
不会有人比我
Nobody else you hire will be more motivated
更想经营好这间牧场
to make that thing work than me.
而且没人像我一样这么了解这块地
And no one knows that land as well as I do.
我不知道 我以前雇佣过你哥
I don't know. I hired your brother
我们电脑里的病毒到现在还没清理干净
and we still got viruses on all the computers.
听着 公鸡没什么可在乎的 我有
Look, Rooster didn't have nothing to work for. I do.
我愿意赚更少的钱而付出双倍努力
I will work twice as hard for less money.
你前面亲口说的 这是商业决策 对吗
You said so yourself. It's a business decision, right?
用合算的价钱请到好牧主
How can hiring a great rancher for a great price
怎么会是糟糕的商业决策呢
be a bad business decision?
我愿意试试让你来经营这间牧场
I am willing to give you a shot at running that ranch,
前提是你♥爸♥同意
if you get your dad's blessing first.
真的吗 你会雇用我吗
Seriously? You'll hire me?
如果他同意的话
If he says it's okay.
好的 那好 谢谢 这真是太好了
Okay. All right, thank you. This is awesome.
我
I...
既然咱们是在谈合同 我要提条件
Now that we've entered a negotiation, I'd like to counter.
你能替我去问我爸吗
Could you ask my dad for me?
不能
No.
好吧
That's fair.
我问的时候你会跟我一起去吗 - 不会
Will you come with me when I ask him? - No.
该死
Damn it.
我真可以在这个球上签名吗
Can I really sign the football?
不行 - 那好吧 我们谈得很愉快
No. - Okay. Yeah, good talk.
诺依曼山的牛情况如何
So, how do the Neumann's Hill cattle look?
非常好 我让你看看
Really good. I'll show you.
我买♥♥了部带肖像模式的新苹果手♥机♥
I got a new iPhone with a portrait mode.
以前要是想拍出这么好的肖像照
It used to if you wanted a picture this good,
得带着牛去西尔斯商场拍才行
you'd have to take your cow to Sears.
我知道 我收到你的圣诞贺卡了
I know. I got your Christmas card.
那么 乔安妮住过来之后事情都顺利吗
So, um... how's everything going with Joanne moving in here?
挺好的
Fine.
你干什么错事了
Now, what'd you do wrong?
她之前说想好好谈谈 可我不想
She wanted to talk and I didn't.
跟目前的情形差不多
Not unlike the current situation I find myself in.
好吧 挺难办的
Well, that's tough.
你想谈谈吗
You wanna talk about it?
此外 她还把我的咖啡机
On top of that, she replaced my coffee pot
换成了一台很酷的机器
with a fancy pod machine.
最糟糕的是 我喜欢这台新的咖啡机
Worst part is, I kinda liked it,
虽然煮出来的咖啡是法式香草味的
even though the vanilla was French.
你买♥♥克里格咖啡机了 什么型号♥的
You got a Keurig? What model?
就是那种煮杯咖啡要20分钟的
I got whichever one takes 20 minutes to make a cup of coffee.
所以 她的房♥子烧没了
So... her house burns down.
她买♥♥了礼物给你 还想跟你好好谈谈
She buys you a gift and then she wants to talk.
这女人还真有胆量
Why, that woman's got a lot of nerve.
你得跟她道歉
You're gonna have to apologize.
她现在躲着我
She's avoiding me.
今早我还没起床 她就起床上班去了
She was up and off to work before I woke up this morning.
我觉得这个岁数开始新恋情太晚了
I think I'm too old to start a new relationship.
别怪岁数 你这老家伙
Ah, don't blame age, you grumpy son of a bitch.
我岁数不小了 但我是个开心果
I'm old, but I'm a delight.
要是你不想跟她在一起
If you don't want her in your life,
那你干吗要让她住到你家来
why did you ask her to come stay to begin with?
我没说我不想跟她在一起
I didn't say I didn't want her in my life.
如果真是这样 你得表现出来给她看
If that's true, you gotta show her.
之前我跟沙琳感情遇到危机时 我动用了三样东西道歉
When I screw up with Charlene, I apologize with the three F's:
花 足底按♥摩♥和福德洛克汉堡
flowers, foot rub and Fuddruckers.
我不喜欢那家店
I hate that place.
要是我自己动手做汉堡 凭什么还要付钱
Why am I paying if I gotta build my own damn burger?
你配不上乔安妮
Yeah, you don't deserve Joanne,
但似乎她不明白这点
but, uh, seem like she don't know it.
所以换作我是你 我会不惜一切
So, if I were you, I'd do everything I could
不让她意识到这一点
to keep her in the dark.
嘿 戴尔 - 嘿 柯尔特
Hey, Dale. - Hey, Colt.
老爸 我需要跟你谈谈
Dad, I need to talk to you.