牧场趣事（2016）

火球
Fireball!
明天就我们俩去登记结婚
Tomorrow will just be our thing.
好啊
Yeah...
这说法我喜欢 - 是啊
I like our things. - Yeah.
这就像你玩填字游戏时
This is like when you do a crossword puzzle
我玩Xbox游戏机
while I am playing Xbox.
或是你看书时我玩Xbox
Or when you read a book while I'm playing Xbox.
或是你玩Xbox时
Or when you play Xbox,
犯了个错
and I see you did something wrong,
可我什么都没说直到轮到我玩
but I don't say nothin' until it's my turn to play Xbox.
如果可以跟Xbox上♥床♥
Okay, if you could have sex with an Xbox,
你还会跟我在一起吗
would you still be with me?
跟你结婚我真是太高兴了
I'm so excited we're getting married.
哦 天啊 你可真坏
Oh, my God! You're so bad!
看看这些人
Look at these people,
火烧眉毛了才想起来囤货
waitin' on an emergency to stock up on supplies.
行了 博 可不是谁都会
Well, Beau, not everybody
在地下室里储存够吃三年的牛肉干的
has three years of beef jerky in their bunker.
小心被他们听到找上门来
Shh. They'll hear you and come for it.
要是我把钱给你
Hey, if I give you some money,
你能替我买♥♥过敏药吗
will you buy me some allergy medicine?
没问题 你怎么不自己去买♥♥
Sure. Why can't you?
上次我女儿来镇上时
Well, last time my daughter was in town,
用我的驾照
she used my driver's license to buy, like,
买♥♥了40盒速达菲用来制冰♥毒♥
40 packs of Sudafed to make meth.
我为此上了黑名单
I'm on a list.
我持有的枪比加拿大全国的数量都多
I got more guns than the entire country of Canada.
我就没上什么黑名单
I'm on no list.
上帝保佑美国
God bless America.
本奈特先生 你的处方药好了 130块
Mr. Bennett, your prescription's ready. That'll be $130.
还好我有医保
Good thing I have insurance.
这是扣除医保之后的价格
That's after insurance.
开什么玩笑 每个月130块
Are you kidding? 130 bucks every month?
要是医保什么都覆盖不了
What's the point of having insurance
还要它干吗
if it doesn't pay for anything?
我不买♥♥了
Keep 'em.
嘿 博 博伊德医生说你需要那种药
Beau, hey, Beau, Dr. Boyd said you needed that medicine.
当然了
Well, of course she did.
她要付直播电视公♥司♥足球转播套餐的钱
She wants to pay for that DirecTV soccer package.
不是所有事都存在什么阴谋论
Everything isn't a conspiracy.
行了 他们是串通好的
Oh, hell, they're all in this together:
医生 制药公♥司♥ 医保公♥司♥
the doctors, the drug companies, the insurance providers,
食品行业
the food industry.
"请好好吃饭" 去他们的
"Please take on a full stomach." Fuck them.
你说话就像给<拉什林堡脱口秀>打电♥话♥的那些人
You sound like those guys who call into the Rush Limbaugh Show.
我是给拉什林堡打过电♥话♥
I've called Rush Limbaugh.
你为什么要付这笔钱
How the hell are you supposed to pay for this?
他们在不公平地对待我们 因为他们知道可以这样
They're trying to screw us 'cause they know they can.
我知道这不公平 但你又能怎么样
I know it isn't fair, but what're you gonna do?
如果是你的孩子需要这些药 你会不买♥♥吗
If one of your kids needed these pills, wouldn't you buy 'em?
好吧 走吧
All right, let's go.
胡扯
Bullshit.
嘿 - 怎么样
Oh, hey. - What's up?
你闻到烟味儿了吗
Do you smell smoke?
闻到了
Yeah.
新闻里说当局会控制火势不让它烧到145高速路上
News said they're doing a controlled burn down off the 145.
没什么好担心的
Don't think it's nothing to worry about.
他们之前还说不用担心禽流感呢
Yeah, they also said don't worry about the bird flu,
可我过街时
but I tell you what, I see a pigeon sneezing,
还看到鸽子打喷嚏呢
I'm crossing the fucking street.
嘿
Hey,
你明天能去法♥院♥吗
come down to the courthouse tomorrow?
怎么了 法官是女的吗
What's the matter, you got a female judge?
要我去搞定她吗
Want me to come down there and bang her gavel?
我和艾比要去登记结婚
Me and Abby's getting married.
我们没请任何人 但
We ain't inviting anyone, but...
我希望你能来当我们的证婚人
I want you to come and stand for us.
这是我的荣幸
Yeah, dude. I'd be honored.
可你们怎么不办婚礼了
What're you doing bailing on the wedding, though?
你欠我一个喝醉了的伴娘
You know, you owe me a drunken bridesmaid.
婚礼会办的 但要等到孩子出生以后
Oh, we're still doing the ceremony. Just after we have the baby.
艾比想在婚礼上畅饮
Abby wants to get drunk at the wedding.
到时候宝宝还可以穿超小号♥的燕尾服
Plus, the baby can wear one of those tiny tuxedos.
如果你不出席 宝宝可以借你的穿
If you weren't in the wedding, I'd say he could borrow yours.
是啊 那太好了
Yeah, that's cool.
你知道等宝宝九岁时我会给他买♥♥烟的 对吗
You know, I'm gonna start buying your kids cigarettes when he's like nine, right?
帮我把发电机从车上搬下来
Hey, do me a favor. Come help me unload this genny.
好的 你把它修好了
Yeah, you fix 'er up?
你从哪弄来的
Where'd you get this?
从那家新开的发动机店买♥♥的
Oh, from this, uh, new generator store just opened up.
店名叫"关你鸟事"
It's called None of Your Fucking Business.
你的假想女友去上的高中也叫这个名
That's the same high school your pretend girlfriend went to.
说真的
No, seriously though,
是你偷的吗
did you steal this?
老兄 拜托 不用担心
Oh, dude. Come on, man. Don't worry about it.
哦 不 那可不行 规矩你知道的
Oh, no. Fuck that, man. You know the rule.
便利店里能装进口袋里的东西都行
Anything you fit in your pocket from 7-Eleven's okay:
咀嚼药草 糖果 玉米片
dip, candy, nachos.
我们在做
Look, man. We're all doing what we gotta do
能让牧场经营下去的事
to keep the ranch going--
不 我们不干非法的事 老兄
No, no! We ain't all doing shady shit, man.
是吗 那张支票是哪来的
Oh, really? Where'd you get that check from?
你知道我不能说
Look, you know I can't tell you.
那我就不能说这台发电机是哪来的
Well, then I can't tell you where the generator came from.
不 区别在于
No, there's a big difference between
一个是跟想保密的人借钱
taking a loan from somebody who wants to help out quietly
另一个是偷发电机
and stealing a fucking generator.
有什么区别
What's the difference?
一个的结局是"把电♥话♥拿起来"
Well, one ends with the phrase "Pick up the phone".
"玻璃对面涂唇膏的那个人就是你公鸡叔叔"
"The man wearing lipstick behind the glass is your Uncle Rooster."
老兄 我这是在帮老爸的忙好吗
Dude, I'm solving Dad's problem, okay?
如果火烧到我们这里来 虽然不可能
If the fire hits us, which it's not going to,
我们就有了能让水泵和水洒工作的发电机
now we got a generator to run the pumps, run the sprinklers.
你怎么跟老爸说
All right, what're you gonna tell Dad?
不知道 你跟老爸怎么说 我就怎么说
I don't know. Tell him the same shit you did.
"我不能告诉你 老爸 我是个神秘英雄"
"Well, I can't tell you, Daddy. I'm like a mysterious hero."
"我想穿有鞋内底的靴子"
"I like to wear boots with insoles in 'em."
"但我们俩都穿袜子的时候"
"But when we're both wearing socks,"
"我比英俊的老哥公鸡高不了多少"
"I'm not much taller than my handsome brother Rooster."
你总归得跟老爸说点什么
You'll have to tell Dad something.
不用你管 快帮我把它搬下来
It's not your problem, dude. Now help me unload this thing.
拜托 你那边能再抬高点儿吗
Come on, can you lift your side a little higher?
我说什么呢 你可比我矮30公分呢
Oh, shit what am I saying? You're like a foot shorter than me.
要是看到我那张约翰韦恩的签名照片
If you see my signed John Wayne photo there,
就把它装进盒子里
put it in the box.
要是那样就没地方放两个儿子做的工艺品
If that means there's no room for some of the boys' artwork,
让它们烧去吧
let it burn.
几乎所有的照片里都只有柯尔特
Almost all the pictures are just Colt.
他知道怎么用相机的自动定时器之后
Once he figured out how to use the auto-timer,
就用那个功能拍了两年的照片
that's all he did for two years.
后来他发现了吹干机
And then, when he discovered the hair dryer,
他摆弄那玩意儿又摆弄了两年
that's all he did for two years.
他这是把发梢染成金色的了吗
Did he frost his tips?
我不知道这是什么意思
I don't know what that means.
放进盒子里
Put it in the box.
你怎么看 火不会烧到我们这里吗
What do you think, Beau? The fire gonna miss us?
我当然这么希望 我可不想96年的大火再来一次
I sure hope so. I don't wanna live '96 all over again.
你当时有损失吗
Did you get hit?
有很多优良的草场被烧了
Yeah, we lost a lot of good grass,
但牛群没什么损失
but no cattle.