最后一个男人（2015）

The Last Man On Earth S01E01

Part 5 Dec. 2, 2020, 2:02 p.m.

你的脚怎么了
I dropped the manhole cover on it.
被井盖砸了
I'm fine.
没事
You don't look fine.
你看着不像没事
I'm fine.
我没事
Son of a bee sting!
他妈哒
You win, manhole!
败给你了井盖
Carol, what are you doing?
卡萝尔你要干什么
What does it look like?
你看着像什么
It looks like you're making a toilet fountain.
像你要拿喷泉当厕所用
Bingo.
回答正确
And you'll be happy to hear
我放弃饮水计划了
I've given up on the water project.
你听了肯定高兴坏了吧
And everything else, too.
其他一切也都放弃了
Are-are your pants on?
你穿着裤子吗
For now.
还没脱
Look, wh... what are you talking about?
你说什么呢
I can't even raise a tomahto. Tomato.
我番茄都种不活是西红柿
What makes me think I could ever give birth
又怎么能繁衍出
to a whole new civilization?
一个崭新的文明呢
Carol, I think you're overreacting a little.
卡萝尔我觉得你小题大做了
Look, you're off the hook.
你就此解脱了
I was wrong about our purpose.
是我想错了
We weren't chosen.
我们不是被选中
We were forgotten.
而是被遗忘了
Carol, it's just a stupid garden.
卡萝尔不就是个傻♥逼♥菜园吗
Yeah.
是啊
It's also a parking spot.
还有停车位
I really do have to go.
我真得方便了
Like, bad.
快憋不住了
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it, damn it, damn it!
妈的妈的妈的
Damn it!
妈的
You've been tamed, sir.
我已经驯服你了先生
Damn it!
妈的
Damn it!
妈的
Carol.
卡萝尔
Hello, Phil.
你好菲尔
How's the foot? Not great.
你的脚怎么样了不怎么样
How's the toilet fountain? Full.
你的喷泉厕所呢满了
Ah, geez, Carol.
天卡萝尔
Could you come with me for a minute?
你能跟我出来一下吗
You know anything about this?
你知道这怎么回事吗
Nope. Can't help you.
不知道帮不了你
Really?
真的吗
No. Carol, I mean, look at this thing.
卡萝尔你看看这一切
Whoever did this would've had to stay up all night
要弄好这个肯定得花上一整夜功夫
and go research water systems at a library
还得去图书馆研究水利系统
and then put all this stuff together.
然后才能弄得好吧
Do I look like somebody who could do something like that?
你觉得我像做那种事的人吗
Y-You're right. Couldn't have been you.
说得对不可能是你
You want to come over for dinner tonight?
今晚你想来一起吃晚餐吗
Yeah. I'd like that.
好啊我愿意
Okay.
好
Well, see you.
那回见
Hey, uh, Carol?
等等卡萝尔
You know I did this, right?
你知道这是我弄的对吧
Yeah, I know, Phil.
我知道菲尔
It was... a lot of work and it took all night
真的...是项大工程而且折腾了一整晚
and I had to go to a library and read a bunch of crap.
我还去图书馆研究了一大堆东西
Yeah, it's very, very obvious it was you who did it.
我知道很明显是你弄的
Feels good, I'll admit.
不得不说感觉不错
It feels good to be so selfless.
无私奉献的感觉真不错
Anyway, we can talk more about it at dinner.
晚餐的时候我们可以再聊
Okay.
好
I have a feeling we're gonna remember
我觉得我这一壮举
what I did here today for a long time.
肯定会让我们铭记很长一段时间
And that's cool.
感觉真不错
There's a fork, if... if you need it.
有叉子如果你需要的话
I'm good.
不用
This is really nice.
这样真好
I know.
我知道
You showed a lot of chutzpah today, Phil.
你今天真是胆识过人菲尔
And it made me think that
这让我觉得
maybe God does want us to lay together.
上帝可能是想让我们在一起
Okay.
好啊
I've been really horny, so...
我一直很饥渴所以...
Well, that's nice.
这样好啊
I should probably go wash my balls first.
我好像应该先去洗洗我的蛋蛋
Meet you back here in five? Want to knock it out?
五分钟后来找你好吗好好爽一把
No.
不
Wait, I don't... What do you mean?
我不...你什么意思
I'm not gonna have sex with you unless we're married.
要是不结婚我才不跟你做♥爱♥
Oh, it's nice to see you smile.
看到你笑了真好
That is your first really good joke.
这是你说的第一个成功的笑话
That's very funny.
好好笑哦
Phil, I'm not kidding.
菲尔我没开玩笑
We have to be married first.
我们得先结婚
You're serious. Yes.
你是认真的对
Then, no.
那不要
Phil, we can't...
菲尔我们不能...
Absolute no.
绝对不行
Why not?
为什么不
Wh... what do you mean, "why not?"
什么叫"为什么不"
Why?
为什么要
The first child of this new world is not gonna be a bastard.
新世界的第一个孩子不能是个野种
Yeah, 'cause it's not gonna exist,
当然因为那个孩子不会有
'cause I'm not gonna marry you.
因为我不会跟你结婚
Then you're the bastard.
那你就是个混♥蛋♥
Fine, I'm the bastard.
好啊我是混♥蛋♥
And good-bye human race.
永别了人类
Thank you for dinner.
谢谢你的晚餐
I am going to go back to my house...
我要回我家...
Right.
好啊
think about how crazy you are.
去想想你有多神经病
Okay.
好啊
Enjoy those... You are being serious?!
你享受... 你是认真的吗
Yes.
对
Why do you have to be married?
你为什么一定要结婚
It-it doesn't mean anything anymore.
婚姻没有任何意义了啊
It means something to me, Phil.
对我来说有意义菲尔
Well, it doesn't mean anything to me.
对我来说没有意义啊
Then why do you care?
没意义你跟我较什么真
What is happening here?!
搞什么飞机啊
It's tomato! It's tomato!
是西红柿西红柿
Oh, hi.
你好
Fine.
行
We're married.
我们结婚了
Phil, get down on one knee and do it properly.
菲尔你要单膝跪地正式求婚
This is so stupid.
真是太傻了
Can you do it over here? Carol...
能过来跪吗卡萝尔...
Well, do it... We...
就来这里... 我们...
Get it over here... over here...
过来到这边来...
No! This is where the proposal is happening.
不要我就要在这里求婚
Okay. You want it, you come over here and get it.