大世界之旅（2016）

There was the original 20-valve Quattro,
后来很显然...有R8 还有TT RS 以及我这辆车
the R8, obviously, the TT RS, and this.
2007款奥迪RS 4
The 2007 RS 4.
在我的字典里 史上最棒的三款发动机是雷克萨斯的V10
The three best engines ever made, in my book, are the Lexus V10,
阿尔法罗密欧的V6 以及这一款
Alfa Romeo's V6, and this,
奥迪4.2升 自然吸气
Audi's 4.2-litre naturally-aspirated
414匹马力 V8发动机
414-horsepower V8.
老天 我超爱V8发动机
God, I love V8s.
詹姆斯 你的Evo 赢过多少次世界汽车拉力锦标赛？
James, how many World Rally Championship wins does your Evo have?
哈蒙德 你能问我这个问题 我太高兴了 因为我还真知道 一共26次
Oh, well, I'm glad you asked me that, Hammond, because actually I do know. It's 26.
了不起啊 赢了那么多次
That's impressive. That's a big number.
但还有更了不起的 我的斯巴鲁赢过46次 比你还多
Here's a bigger number. Mine has 46, which is many more.
杰里米 你的奥迪 赢过多少次世界汽车拉力锦标赛？
Jeremy, how many World Rally Championship wins does your Audi have?
我想想
Let me think.
一次...也没有
It's none.
对 没有 一次都没有
Yes, none. None at all.
你现在开着 不是四驱的奥迪参加冰雪挑战
What you have done by turning up at this challenge in your Audi not-a-Quattro
简直就像 在农场上开兰博基尼埃文塔多犁地
is exactly the same as you turning up at your farm with a Lamborghini Aventador.
没错 兰博基尼造过拖拉机 但埃文塔多可不是拖拉机
Yes, Lamborghini made a tractor, but that isn't one.
你可以在皇家道尔顿茶杯里撒一大泡尿
You could take a massive piss in a Royal Doulton tea cup.
没错 皇家道尔顿的确造过小便池 但茶杯不是便池
Yes, they did make urinals, but that isn't one.
我这车比你们的快多了
It's a damn sight faster than your cars.
并没有
Well, it's not.
在各种环境下 这辆车都是最快的
This is the fastest car in all environments.
在拉力赛中可不一定 毕竟奥迪根本没有参加过
Well, we don't know about rallies because it hasn't been in one.
我能说吗？这并不是 我去过“最具荒野特色”的地方
Can I just say, it's not the most wildernessy place I've ever been to.
沿途有的风景非常壮观 但是...
I mean, some of the scenery's pretty spectacular, but
道路没有封闭 路旁还有电线杆
roads, Armcos, telegraph poles.
没错 对于一片荒野来说 这里很多风景也太“没有荒野特色了”
There's a great many non-wildernessy things around for a wilderness, yes.
我还是第一次对 英国广播公♥司♥和卫报的评价感到困惑呢
Not for the first time, I'm baffled by the views of the BBC and The Guardian.
但是我们深信不疑 接下来很快将进入真正的荒野
Convinced, however, that we soon would enter the wilderness,
我们停在了 一家汽车配件店
we pulled up at a car accessories shop
储备一些重要的物资
to stock up on important supplies.
我想买♥♥一个挡风玻璃雨刷器 给我的斯巴鲁翼豹WRX STi V限♥量♥版用
I'd like to buy a windscreen wiper for a Subaru Impreza WRX STi V-Limited edition.
那好 我要看看 能不能买♥♥到播音乐用的SD存储卡
Well, I'm gonna see if I can buy some SD cards to play music.
糟糕
Shit!
老天爷啊！完全没有抓地力
Oh! Good God! There's absolutely no grip!
好吧
Right.
我靠
Holy crap!
根本不需要迈开腿 -我还以为在荒野里...
You don't need to move your legs! -I thought in the wilderness...
导演滑倒了 -导演滑倒了
Director down. -Director down.
我们倒是想跑过去帮你 但我们做不到啊
We'd run over and help you, but we can't.
你没事吧？ -没事 继续吧
You all right? -Oh, yes. Sorry, carry on.
终于 我们小心翼翼、体体面面地
Slowly and with dignity,
挪到了入口...
we all worked our way to the entrance.
...完蛋
...hell.
不行 这方法根本没用
No, that hasn't worked at all.
根本行不通
No, that's not worked.
...幸运的是 我们终于找到了些许摩擦力
Where, mercifully, we found some friction.
我非常喜欢穿越荒野 快看这个
This, I quite enjoy going across. Look at this.
这就是荒野风吧？一切都关乎生存 -这是...
This is a wilderness, isn't it? It's about survival now. -This is a...
我算是明白 英国广播公♥司♥和卫报是什么意思了 -是的
I can see what the BBC and The Guardian meant. -Well, yeah.
你需要什么？斯巴鲁
What do you need? Subaru?
是的
Yeah.
哪一款车型？翼豹 哪一款翼豹？
Well, what sort is it? Impreza, which one?
傲虎、翼豹、力狮 -是WRX
Outback, Impreza... -WRX.
2003款的WRX STi V限♥量♥版
It's a 2003 WRX STi V-Limited edition,
限♥量♥555辆 产地日本
one of 555 made in Japan
为了庆祝2003年... -BRZ？
to celebrate the 2003... -BRZ？
在世界汽车拉力锦标赛中 荣获车手锦标赛冠军 -哦，对对对
Drivers Championship victory In the World Rally Championship. -Yeah, all right.
你的车是G12、G22、G13、G23吗？
Yes. Is it a G12, G22, G13, G23?
我不知道
I don't know.
你不知道？ -但是...
You don't know? -Well, I...
WRX 在这里 -没错
WRX. Here it is. -Yes?
找到了 V-10
Got it. V10.
对了 还要买♥♥SD卡
Right, SD cards.
挪威语的“SD卡”怎么说？
How do you say 'SD card' in Norwegian?
“我是个蠢货”
'I'm a twat'.
你好
Hello.
SD卡
SD card.
SD卡？ -你们有吗？
SD card? -Have you got them?
因为我的车太老了
Because my car is quite old.
杰里米？
Jeremy?
那是什么？ -“雪地抓地力”
What is it? -Snow grip.
全都是挪威语
Well, it's all in Norwegian.
可能只有挪威才需要用 -我们都不知道是什么用途
Well, I mean, it doesn't come out in Norwegian. -Well, but we don't know what it does.
我不知道 但想想看 “雪地抓地力”
Well, it's, I dunno. Let's think, snow grip.
对 喷在你的轮胎上 -这能让柏油路变得很滑
Yes, I think you spray it on your tyres. -It makes tarmac really slippery.
喷在你的脚上 -这是龟牌蜡
Yeah, well spray it on your feet. -It's turtle wax.
你为什么要把龟牌蜡
Why would you put turtle wax on something?
不，这只是他们生产的 喷在你的脚上-喷在你的脚上！
No, it's made by them. Spray it on your feet! -Spray it on your feet.
像这样 -喷在你的鞋底
Like that. -The bottoms of your shoes.
对的 -这东西？
Yeah. -These two?
东西置备完毕我们返回车上
Purchases made, we headed back to the cars.
这下好了！
Yeah.
而我用自身内置的
With me using my inbuilt
暖流喷射系统融化出了一条小路
warm fluid dispensing system to melt a path.
向前挪步
Shuffle forwards.
真是天才
Genius.
重回公路
Back on the road,
黑白相间的景色愈发壮观
the black-and-white scenery became even more spectacular.
我的天啊 快看那边
Holy shit. Look at that.
但美景中出现了一个污点
But there was one blot in it.
你们注意到没有 从我们离开足球场起 这辆红色沃尔沃
Have you noticed this red Volvo that's been following us
就一直在跟着我们？
since we left the football pitch?
当时我看到它开下来了 但确定是同一辆沃尔沃吗？
I see, yes, I saw it then as we came down there. Is that definitely the same Volvo?
前面有四个矩形拉力灯的那辆吧？
With the four rectangular rally lights on the front of it?
没错 就是同一辆
Yeah, it's the same one.
很快 我们的车就快没油了
Soon, we were getting low on fuel.
在荒野里怎么买♥♥汽油？
How shall we buy petrol in the wilderness?
估计我们得用树皮和页岩自行炼一些吧
Perhaps we shall have to make some out of tree bark and shale.
不用了 没事的 快看 前面有个加油站
Oh, no, it's all right. Look, there's a petrol station.
便利店
就在我们给车加油 把小零食装车的时候
And, while we were loading up with fuel and snacks,
成立于2018年 汉堡之家
练粗线条？ 我还以为你说要多加薯条
我有所发现
I noticed something.
詹姆斯？ -怎么了？
James? -Yes?
我们左转右转拐来拐去
Now, we have made some left and right turns.
没错 -结果那辆车...
Yes. -And that,
你知道我在想什么吗？ -知道
you know what I'm thinking? -Yes.
威尔曼先生 是的 -威尔曼先生为我们准备了
Mr Wilman? Yes. -Mr Wilman has provided us
一辆备用车 因为他觉得经过...
with a backup car because he assumes that after...
我们多久没拍戏？
How long have we not been filming?
三年吧? 他觉得我们 已经忘了怎么开车 可能还会撞车
Three years? We'll have forgotten how to drive. And we'll crash into a tree,
哈蒙德大概率会撞车 哈蒙德 我们弄明白了
which Hammond probably will. Hammond, we've worked something out.
你看
Look.
那肯定是辆备用车 -是的
That's gotta be a backup car. -It's a backup car.
那是一辆沃尔沃 三 四...五 一辆五门沃尔沃
It's a Volvo three, four, five, it's the five-door.
我姐姐就有过一辆 我不得不说
My sister had one, and I'm going to have to say,
这可能是西欧生产的
it's possibly the worst car
最糟糕的汽车
made by Western Europe.
这么长时间 那辆车就一直伴我们左右
And it's been with us the whole time.
是的 -对 没错
Yes. -It is then, yep. It is.
随着我们继续向北 天气终于变得有些许荒野之意
As we headed further north, the weather finally turned wilderness-ish.
下雪了
Yeah, snowing.
下雪了
Snowing.
这就是现在的天气状况
That's what it's doing.
由此导致 我无法展示这辆四驱奥迪的卓越速度
Which put the kibosh on me demonstrating the superior speed of my Quattro.
好吧 看样子我们不太可能
Yeah, we probably can't do
在这里测试零到百公里加速了吧？ 因为路况有点复杂
a nought-to-sixty run here. Can we? 'Cause it's a bit squirrelly.
这真的让人很恼火
This is infuriating, actually,